Hey Guys! This is a very depressing fan-fiction. I know, I would be disappointed in myself too. I don't own Marvel. And..

WARNINGS: Suicide, cutting, mentions of sex, mentions or rape and sexual assault.

You have been warned. I don't want to offend anybody of hurt someone. I have been through some of these things and did research of some topics so I am not just a dumb white chick 'glorifying' shit, I would hate myself if I did that.

So leave a KUDOS and comment your thoughts. Please reach out to a friend, family member or to someone you trust. For more stuff like this go check out 'Something's Gotta Give' for more shit.

Enjoy! :)

Wades Pov:

Walking down the street to you.

Queens is such a nice place, how could you ever leave?

I walk towards the cemetery and see how dark and fucking gloomy it is. The fog swirls and hangs there like I am not here.

Your grave is beside a tree.

I chose to put it there.

Just for you, I know you hated stupid shit like this but I didn't want those greedy men to be beside you.

I am still jealous of them still when they are closer to you right now. Wow, what's happening to me? I am getting crazy over you again.

Help me, I want you so bad.

I walk to the tree.

Your tree.

I walk to your spot. The trees sparkle as the sun hits you.

You're grave.

I look at your grave. It was a decent grave, nothing fancy since grave stones are not cheap. I am so sorry that I couldn't help you. Or save you.
I have failed you.

Flashback

"Peter what the fucking hell is wrong with you today god!"

He storms towards me with tears running down his cheeks.

"You know NOTHING!" His scream sends shivers down my spine.

I grab him by the waist and place my lips onto his. We kiss for a moment before he starts to squirm and squeal.

We broke apart

For the last time...

He storms right out of my reach. I stare into his back feeling regret and shame over what I did.

It was just a kiss. Right?

End flash back.

I should have known then. Right then and there. I can't believe I didn't see it then. What the fuck is wrong with me? I was a horrible boyfriend! I never payed attention to him enough! Should have done more!

I feel tears starting to form. I don't want to cry right now baby. No, no, no.

I feel on my knees crying and sobbing on your grave.

"I'M SORRY PETER! PLEASE FORGIVE ME!"

I want to touch you. I want to hear your moans screaming my name. I miss the feeling inside of you. I want to be inside of you again baby.

But somebody bet me to it. I know Skip raped you on the day you died. I found out through footage of that day in the school locker room. You begging for my help.

"WADE PLEASE HELP ME!"

The blood gushing down your leg from the roughness that Skip was forcing upon you. Your tears, the pain and agony your face shows crushes my heart over and over again.

I can't think about it now. Not now, not ever.

The hot tear stains on my face are starting to fade, my mouth felt dry and sore from all the begging and crying.

"I'm sorry Peter. I love you."

I stood up and left you to rest in peace. I want you so bad right now. I miss you.

Walking back to my apartment was hard. It felt like I was leaving you alone in that cold place. Stepping inside the apartment building was very chilling and depressing. I look at the couch and remember the moments where we made out on the couch, we even had our first kiss there.

"Hey Wade, thanks for saving me earlier."

I remember the way you laid on the couch. You were asking me to get on top of you and do dirty things to you. The feeling of walking over to you and sitting beside you fills my veins.

"Peter..."

"Wade..."

I remember the softness of your cheek when my hand touches it, you said something. I barely remember it though, I was too focused on your begging wet lips.

It was on the lines of "Are you going to forget this?"

All I could remember is my lips crashing onto yours. Licking for an entrance and you granting it, my tongue exploring yours and your moans. They were calling for me.

We almost had sex but Tony was calling. You looked disappointed.

"I have to go." Your whisper seductively into my ear. I kiss your lips again taking your breath.

"It could be an emergency." Your smile makes me even more fucking horny.

"Okay baby boy."

Oh my dear God your ass made me feel so horny. After you left I jacked off for hours to you. That memory cherished in my heart.

I got up from the couch and turned around to see Tony fucking Stark.

"What the?!"

"Wade we need to talk about Peter."

His face looked serious and depressed.

"Were suing the school."

"Okay..."

"We need you to testify. Also we found more footage of ummm you know."

He looked embarrassed and disgusted.

"And ummm we need to talk about all of this with the rest of the Avengers. I'll take you there now."

He looked teary and completely destroyed. We walked out together and got inside his really expensive car. I had just realised something, I never questioned how he got inside.

"Tony."

"Yes Wade."

"How the fuck did you get inside my apartment?"

"You left it open and you were on the couch looking really depressed. In deep thought."

I looked at Tony with tears in my eyes.

"I was thinking of Peter."

He looked back at me with sympathy.

"Oh."

"I remember we almost had sex." I gave him a slight smirk.

"Wait wat?" He looked shocked and a little angry.

"Yeah, until you called." I felt a little angry with him then but I don't about Tony now. I care about you Peter.

"Oh. I apologise. He was under-aged though. I hope you were safe."

"Tony. I was always careful with him. Ever since May died I was slow and careful with him."

A silence filled the car.

"He loved you a lot." my head turned to Tony once again.

"He always talked about how you took care of him and love...ed him..." His voice sounded tired and stressed.

He started to cry and choke on his tears. Thank God this was a self-driving car. We would have died.

I hug Tony as he cries. I think of you again. How you cried into my shoulder when Flash and his group beat you up every day. I told you I could get rid of them but you begged not to. You were always a good kid, even back then.

We arrive at the tower and by then Tony had suck up all the tears and emotion from his face. He showed me to my room, which was Peters.

"Sorry there was no more rooms left. You get Peters."

I look inside the room and see that nothing has been changed. Exactly as he left it, that day.

"It's fine. He wouldn't mind, I'll just sleep on the floor."

He nods and leaves the room.

My dear darling Peter. I miss you.

(In the meeting room.)

I look around the room barley paying attention to what Tony and Steve are saying. Something about the school not doing well enough and didn't tell them about any school incidents and that I had to and about Skip.

Memories of the last week of Peter's life came rushing through my mind. They were happy ones, he seemed a little stressed and panicked but I thought it was about the missions and exams coming up.

He would have aced those exams. He was so smart. He was the smartest person in the world.

"Wade?"

"Hmm yeah?"

Steve gave me a concerned look.

"I know you're sad. But please pay attention."

"I know I was just thinking about him again. He was so smart."

Tony smiled a little.

"He was smarter then all of us." He chuckled.

They continued on the lawsuit. They had found out that Skip had been harassing Peter the whole time he was there. I felt anger grow inside of me, my veins popping and my breathing hitching.

"Wade?" Tony called.

I storm out of the room grabbing my coat and heading straight to Peter's school.

I walk in and see how the school is now. Students hanging up 'Don't kill yourself' posters around which made me furious. All it took is for my baby boy to die to prove their dirty work?

I see him. That evil shit walking around the halls like he owns the place. He makes me sick to the stomach. I look right at him, he looks back. He doesn't seem to be worried or scared. I FUCKING WANT TO KILL HIM.

"Wade?"

I look around behind me to see Steve and Tony.

"We better go now."

Steve put his hand on my shoulder.

"Please Wade." Tony added.

I cooled down a little bit.

Sorry babe. I didn't mean to get angry.

"Yeah. I'm sorry it won't happen again."

They looked concerned and worried but no words were spoken on the drive back to the Avengers facility.

It was night now. I slept on the floor beside you baby. I wanted you so bad right now. I love you, I miss you.

I woke up from another nightmare Petey. It was about that day you died. I will never understand why.

I went inside the building to get answers from him. I want to know what the fucking hell is going on with him, I want to help him! His room wasn't that far to get to. Tony was looking a little stressed about the latest mission.

"Hey Tony! I'll just be talking to Peter."

Tony turned his head towards me.

"Wade there's something wrong with him. He is in a mood so watch out." He chucked and looked worried.

"Yeah." I walk up the stairs to hear a bathtub running. Is he taking a bath? He hates baths. I walk a little faster because I was a little worried. I knock on the door and….

He didn't answer.

"Peter?!" I knock louder. I felt worried.

"I am breaking in!" I smash the door wide open. His room locked neat and tidy. Just the way he liked it.

"Peter!?" I call for him.

He never answered.

I turn to his bathroom door. Water was leaking out the door. It looked a little red.

OH NO…..

I took no time to smash the door open and to see with my own eyes.

Peter covered in his own blood leaking out of his hands.

"Nononononononononononononononono NO!"

I rush to his side, tears whelming my face as I lift him out of the tub and placed him on the floor.

"PETER!" I scream his name. I tried to stop the bleeding but it was coming out too fast. I cup his face and placed my head on his.

"PETER PLEASE!" I whale in pain. I can't lose him! NO!

Tony and Steve rush inside the room. Tony dropped to his knees as Steve calls the ambulance.

"Peter baby no!" Tony crawls to Peter's side and holds his head onto his lap.

"Peter!" He screams his name in deep sorrow as so do I. He rocks back a forth as he kisses Peters forehead. Steve comes over and his eyes were bloodshot red and he fell to his knees beside Peter.

"Tony…." He leaned on his husbands shoulder crying his heart out.

Peter my darling why? WHY?

It was the worse day in our lives.

Steve, Tony and I were crying over the porch as they pronounce you dead. You were being zipped up in a body bag and placed in the ambulance. We cry harder as you were driven away.

I could never forget you. Never.

I got up and got ready. I didn't go into your bathroom since I'll just cry and remember everything again. I miss you.

I walk down to the living room and saw Tony.

"The trail starts today. You and I are getting testified first then Steve. Just be honest and play by the rules."

Steve walks in and kisses Tony.

"You'll be fine babe. So will Wade."

They kissed and we both walked to the car. The drive was just Tony telling me what to say and not to say while Steve was just driving. I nod and asked questions.

When we got there Tony and I stood in front of the building. Tony looked at me and said.

"I can't stop imagining and thinking about what it would be like if we could save Peter." He smiled a little.

"Me too. I wanted to marry him. He was the only one for me." I stare at the clouds and thought of our wedding day if it would to happen.

I miss you Peter. My dear darling.