Hey guys. I'm back again, from a very long hiatus. I'm putting my SayuxMello fanfic on hold because of blasted writer's block. So anyway, I've been into a lot of Bleach lately, so I decided to write a Bleach fic. It's an UlquiHime fanfic, so please bear with me. I still don't know how I feel about the ship, but all I do know is that I wanted to write something with Ulquiorra in it, since I am a huge, huge fan of his. Didn't want to make an OC because it's kind of pointless. As much as I hate Orihime, I just had to put her in it for the sake of writing something with Ulquiorra. Heh, and a bit of Grimmjow and Szayel too. Hope you enjoy, despite the OOC-ness. Sorry. (I'm actually writing this with my Ulquiorra plushie on my lap. Haha) I'll try finishing my last DN fic in good time.

Christmas in Hueco Mundo

An UlquiorraxOrihime oneshot

Inoue Orihime widened her eyes as an irritated Grimmjow passed by her, shaking off pieces of white, cold ice slush from his Espada uniform. He grumbled, "Damn snow's so annoying."

"Grimmjow!" Orihime yelled, startling the sixth Espada. He jumped a bit and faced her, more annoyed than he already was. While glaring at her, he shook his head for the remaining clumps off snow to fall off his sky blue hair. Orihime watched the snow melt into water on the white floor.

Grimmjow crossed his arms impatiently and growled, "What is it, woman? Called me to say something pathetic and stupid again?"

"What's that?" the orange-haired girl asked, pointing at the melting snow. The Espada stared at her in disbelief.

"Piss. What do you think it is?" he replied unsmiling, raising an eyebrow.

Orihime's innocent eyes merely grew wider. "Grimmjow-san, where did you just come from?"

He rolled his eyes, clearly not having the patience to answer any of her questions. "What is it to you, woman?"

Suddenly, Szayel appeared from behind them both, also covered in drooping snow. The pink- haired eighth Espada answered her, "Somewhere in your world, on assignment for Lord Aizen. The rain appears to be frozen now. You haven't seen snow before, Orihime?"

Her flawless face lit up in excitement. "Snow! That only means one thing!"

She hopped up and down in front of both bewildered Espada. "Oh, this is going to be so much fun!"

"What's the girl talking about?" Grimmjow muttered to Szayel.

Szayel shrugged. "How should I know?"

"Well, you're the smart one here. Aren't you supposed to know everything?" snorted Grimmjow.

Orihime sighed in exasperation. "It's the Christmas season, you idiots! Gift-giving, snowball fights, decorating the trees and your homes, warm fuzzy feelings, hot chocolate, Santa Clause!"

Her giggles were endless. "Ahhh, I have to tell Ulquiorra and Aizen-san!"

"Did that bitch just call me an idiot?" slurred Grimmjow, his temper rising again.

He and Syazel gawked after Orihime, who was skipping back to her room singing something that went, "Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way! Oh what fun it is to ride in a one-horse-open sleigh, hey! Jingle bells, jingle bells…"

--

"ULQUIORRAAAAAAA!!" Orihime screamed into the fourth Espada's ear, catching him standing in the hallway outside her room. His expression was vacant once more as he slowly turned around to face her. "I have spoken to Aizen-san about my request and he says he'll talk to you about it!"

She instinctively clutched Ulquiorra's arm as she began walking with him. The young girl doesn't even know what has gotten into her, but she had a hitch it was the holiday spirit, even if the Espada wasn't very nice to her most of the time. She just had a sudden urge to be nice to him. Ulquiorra sighed as he remembered what Lord Aizen had said to him a few moments ago.

"Ahh, Ulquiorra, as you have heard, it's the Christmas season back in Orihime's human world, and I want you to make this the best Christmas she has ever had. She is quite excited about this, and is our guest here, so do whatever she tells you to do, regarding the fact that it is healthy for her of course, and that she must stay in Hueco Mundo at all times. Keep her out of harm's way and make her feel as happy as she can get. In other words, pamper her."

"Yes, Aizen-sama," Ulquiorra nodded without complaint.

"He already has, wo—I mean, Orihime-san," he said through gritted teeth. He had to follow Aizen's orders.

Orihime smiled up at him. "AAAND?"

"And…I agree to help you on this Christmas tradition of which you speak of," sighed the cuatro Espada, closing his eyes.

"Yaaaay!" Orhime squeaked. "You'll have fun too, Ulquiorra-san, I swear!"

Ulquiorra took a deep breath and exhaled, "As you wish."

--

Orihime took advantage of Aizen's orders to Ulquiorra and the rest of the Espada. She wrote a list of things down on a long piece of parchment and asked Ulquiorra to travel to the human world to buy everything. He narrowed his grass green eyes as he scanned through the list quickly.

One Christmas Tree

Loads of Christmas balls

Twelve Santa Clause caps

Nine reindeer figurines

Fruitcake

One dancing Santa Clause

Three bottles of wine

Flan

Christmas wreaths and garlands

Christmas lights

Mistletoe plants

Holly leaves…

The list was endless. He walked along the hallways and grabbed Grimmjow by the collar as soon as he saw him. He continued tugging as the sixth Espada tried to restrain. "You're coming with me."

Grimmjow pulled back, but his opponent was stronger than he. "What?! Where?!"

Ulquiorra continued dragging Grimmjow from the floor and pulled harder. "Christmas shopping," he replied simply.

"Ugh, again?" the blue-haired Arrancar grunted. "When the hell will this Christmas charade stop? And why does Aizen even want to please the woman? She's…a woman!"

Ulquiorra paused for a moment. "I don't know," he answered honestly, but then threateningly, "Though whatever Lord Aizen wants, Lord Aizen will get. You will follow his and Orihime's orders and do whatever they tell you to do, without any complaint at all. And you will do whatever pleases Orihime-san."

"Since when have you been calling her Orihime? I thought you wouldn't stoop to the level of your so-called trash," Grimmjow challenged. Ulquiorra was interrupted when a booming voice came across the halls.

"Ulquiorra! Grimmjow!" the happy orange-haired girl called, waving her arm enthusiastically. "Are you going to do my Christmas shopping today?"

The fourth Espada gave a slight bow at her entrance. "Yes, Orihime-san. Grimmjow here will assist me in finding your desired items."

Grimmjow grimaced and mumbled, "Why can't the woman do it herself?"

Ulquiorra shot him a glare and elbowed him hard on his stomach, hitting Grimmjow's hollow hole. He winced and scowled at Ulquiorra.

Orihime giggled, "That wasn't very necessary, Ulquiorra. Anyway, I'd gladly go with you, but Aizen-sama wants me to stay here at all times. You could bring Szayel with you if you want."

"At least I'd get to devour some souls while over there," Grimmjow trailed off. Orihime frowned.

"You will not devour anyone when you're in the human world," she warned darkly.

Grimmjow glowered at her. "Give them wedgies then."

"No harming any human or animal or any other sort of creature!"

"Poke fun at them then."

"No verbal abuse!"

"Then I'll--"

Ulquiorra held up a hand in front of his comrade. "Grimmjow, shut up."

Grimmjow bit his lip in defeat while Orihime sighed in relief.

The fourth Espada then faced Orihime and took a small bow. "I'll make sure he doesn't do anything foolish."

"That's great," she bounced, tossing a lock of her auburn hair from her face. "Please go now; I want to start decorating this dismal place as soon as possible."

"Yes, Orihime-san."

"And Ulquiorra?" Orihime coyly called as he quickly whirled around while still dragging Grimmjow by his shirt. "It's just Orihime."

She smiled at him, revealing a faint blush embedded on her soft cheeks. She definitely liked him much more now that he was starting to respect her. He even calls her by her own name now, and not woman. A peculiar feeling developed inside Orihime's stomach, causing her to let out a giggle. Ulquiorra, still unsmiling, nodded.

"As you wish."

The sixth Espada was still being pulled by Ulquiorra, refusing to walk anywhere. He mockingly mimicked, "As you wish."

Ulquiorra's hand swiftly yanked Grimmjow's sky blue hair and began pulling his roots instead of his Espada uniform.

--

"Deck the halls with balls of holly, falalalalalalalala. 'Tis the season to be jolly, falalalalalalalala," Orihime sang as she began placing the Christmas balls on the tree Ulquiorra picked out. Szayel wanted to choose a plastic pink tree while Grimmjow was arguing to have it traditionally green, but Ulquiorra had the say and took the snow white colored pine tree which he thought suitable for Hueco Mundo.

Grimmjow though, was the hardest to shop with in Ulquiorra's opinion, since he wanted to kill everyone who giggled in amusement at his blue hair. Szayel on the other hand, was flattered by the attention he got for his bright pink locks.

"Ulquiorra-kun!" Orihime chimed in a sing-song voice. "Could you please pass me the huge yellow star in the shopping bag?"

He did so, and she placed the star right at the top of the white tree, which finally got color after all of Orihime's decorating. Orihime squealed once her creation was complete. She jumped up and down and hugged the three Espada she was with, choking mostly Ulquiorra.

"AHH, IT'S SO BEAUTIFUL, ORIHIME-SAN!" Szayel gushed along, musing over the oversized Christmas tree.

Orihime nodded enthusiastically. "I know it is! And it's all thanks to the help of you three! I love you guys!"

"Group hug!" announced the eighth Espada, as he pulled in Orihime and Ulquiorra. Grimmjow folded his arms in his hard-headedness.

"Grimmjow-kun…please?" pleaded Orihime, as she looked from him to Ulquiorra. The fourth Espada glared at him. Grimmjow sighed in defeat.

"Fine, fine. I guess this isn't going to be so bad after all," he said, joining in the hug. Orihime suddenly paused and rushed to the shopping bags they brought. She continued to skip back to the three Espada, holding two Santa Claus caps and three more Christmas balls. She quickly placed them on the top of Szayel's and Grimmjow's heads. With that, she hung the Christmas balls on the horn of Ulquiorra's helmet.

"There," she sighed contently. "Now everything looks better."

Grimmjow didn't even complain. He knew Ulquiorra would just make him put the hat back on. Szayel stared at her blankly.

"What is it, Szayel-kun?"

"Orihime…" he started, seriously. "DO I LOOK PRETTY?"

She nodded in reply. "You look very pretty, Szayel."

Szayel's eyes sparkled.

"Stupid, smartass homo," Grimmjow grumbled. "I knew this could get any worse."

"Grimmjow…," grunted Ulquiorra threateningly.

"Yes, yes, I know the drill."

--

Christmas was soon everywhere, thanks to Orihime. She placed Santa caps on each of the remaining Espada, even Gin, Tousen, and Aizen. Aizen didn't mind; he actually liked wearing the red cap. Gin, in fact, offered to wear a Santa outfit on the day itself, complete with fake beard and fat suit. Orihime, of course, was ecstatic of the leaders' active participation.

Christmas Eve came eventually (it was surprising to them that Grimmjow was able to last). Orihime demanded a great feast for all of them, even if the Espada didn't eat human food. She made homemade gifts for everyone. She had just finished gift-wrapping the presents when Ulquiorra showed up at her door.

Her face lit up. "Good evening, Ulquiorra-kun!"

"Aizen-sama is calling for you. The feast is ready," he announced, his expression as blank as it usually was. His green eyes trailed to the gifts she was carrying. "May I help you with those?"

The young girl shook her head. "No thanks, Ulquiorra. I can help myself with these. You've done so much for me already."

She thought of how the cuatro Espada has been treating her so kindly over the past month. Orihime stared up into his deep eyes, which stared at her right back. Behind his callous, cold appearance, and his pale, serious exterior, she found him quite endearing, always so chivalrous, and yet so mysterious. Her cheeks turned into a vibrant shade of pink. She wished he would treat her the same way even after Christmas, longing to find out more about the secretive fourth Arrancar.

"Orihime," Ulquiorra breathed, unfathomably bewildered. "What exactly are you staring at?"

She turned even redder as she swiftly looked away. "Nothing. I'm sorry. Silly me, I was in a daze again. Why don't we go on to the feast now?"

Ulquiorra bowed and proceeded to open the door for her.

Orihime's hands were full while she strolled beside Ulquiorra. She doubted not accepting his assistance with the carrying. Her handmade gifts and trinkets were a bit heavy, now that she thought about it. There was silence between the both of them, as she heard the sounds of their Arrancar boots clanking on the floor, and as Ulquiorra's hands were in his pockets again. She couldn't help but reach out and grab his hand. Because of the weight she was carrying, Orihime merely gazed at him once more.

She had stopped fearing him already. She admired him, always being polite around her, and the strength he had possessed. It was as if all of her negative experiences with Ulquiorra had disappeared. He was different now. Was she possibly having feelings for an Arrancar, the Soul Society's sworn enemy?

And what about Ichigo?

Thoughts swirled around Orihime's mind while didn't look where she was going. Reality slammed her back into place, causing her to land her face on a pole. She fell back and dropped her gifts. Orihime braced herself and expected to hit the solid ground, only to feel a pair of cold and hard arms. Opening her eyes, she immediately saw Ulquiorra's worried expression. Her heart beat faster once she did, and she saw something bright above Ulquiorra's head. Ulquiorra held her in his arms for a moment and stared at her, before helping her up to her feet.

"Watch where you're going, Orihime-san," he warned sincerely. But Ulquiorra saw that she wasn't paying attention to him. She continued gawking at the ceiling. Immediately, he did the same. What he saw was some sort of plant hanging right above the both of their heads. He took a lot of plants from the human world, but didn't remember what they exactly were. The confused Espada was about to ask Orihime what it was, when she spoke.

"Ulquiorra-kun," she whispered, looking at the plant. "Do you know what that is?"

Ulquiorra examined her facial expression, not finding anything, but another faint blush on her cheeks. Other than that, she was bewildering, although he thought she looked somewhat nice, seeing her rosy complexion. He shook his head, conceding, putting his hands back inside his pockets.

"It's a mistletoe plant," Orihime quietly said, her cheeks reddening as each moment passed. She tucked a lock of orange hair behind her ear and sighed. Her mood suddenly dropped, and she stood there, not meeting Ulquiorra's curious gaze.

He was taken aback. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," sighed Orihime once more. "Let's just go."

She began to pick up her bags when he stopped her from doing so.

"Orihime," he breathed her name, earnestly, and truthfully. "Is there not something I can do?"

Her eyebrows scrunched together in confusion. "You don't know what the mistletoe is for, do you?"

"No," Ulquiorra replied. He paused. "But I can make a good guess."

Orihime was skeptical. "Oh, really."

She didn't know what she was in for.

The pale Arrancar was quick. His hands were swiftly removed from his pockets and he gently carried Orihime's face, careful not to damage her fragile features. He lowered his head to her level, and hesitated for a moment, before finally pressing his frigid lips on Orihime's warm ones. He closed his eyes as he tasted her sweetness, and caressed her soft lips.

Orihime lightly kissed him back, swinging her arms around his neck, pulling him closer.

He pulled away, leaving Orihime unsatisfied, but still pulling her chin up so he could enjoy the moment. Her hands balled into fists as they rested on his chest. She felt no beating inside.

"That was…unexpected," she smirked, breaking the silence.

Ulquiorra pulled on a small smile, the same smile he had on when he first saw her in the white Arrancar dress. "I told you I can make a good guess."

"How'd you…"

He shrugged. "You're a bit easy to read."

Orihime leaned up toward him and gave him another kiss.

"We should really stop doing this," said Ulquiorra, closing his eyes in disbelief.

"Why?" Orihime demanded.

He paused and touched her vivid orange hair. "I might…fall for you."

She frowned. "And that's a bad thing?"

"Or maybe I already have," Ulquiorra smiled. Orihime giggled.

"I like it when you smile."

Another voice joined in, taking the couple by surprise. "Well, this is a sight to see."

Grimmjow smiled as well, maliciously at the both of them. Orihime poked Ulquiorra's shoulder and nudged her head at something above Grimmjow. They grinned deviously in unison. The sixth Espada scratched his head in confusion.

Szayel came yawning out to Grimmjow's side. "What's up? Why are Orihime-san and Ulquiorra-san holding each other?"

"That's up!" Orihime squealed, pointing at the mistletoe lingering above Szayel's and Grimmjow's heads.

"What's your point, woman?" Grimmjow spat. Szayel lit up immediately and grabbed Grimmjow's collar, kissing him full on the lips. The eighth Espada held him tightly, while Grimmjow struggled free.

Orihime laughed, and finally looked at Ulquiorra. "Merry Christmas, Ulquiorra-kun."

"Merry Christmas, Orihime," whispered Ulquiorra in reply, bowing his head down to kiss her another time.

--

FIN.

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