1. Catwoman's Boots
Commissioner Gordon was enjoying a quiet moment at headquarters. Suddenly, the buzzer on his intercom went off.
"Yes, Ruth."
"Sir, Catwoman is here to see you!"
"Catwoman?"
"Yes, sir!"
"Well, show her in."
"Yes, sir."
She came in. "Hello, commissioner."
"Hello, Catwoman. Have you perhaps, come to give yourself up?"
A feigned look of surprise came to her face. "Give myself up? Whatever for?"
"Well, there was the recent theft of the Victorian-era Gold Cat from the Gotham Collection."
"You blame it on me?"
"Let's just say you're a prime suspect."
"But you have no proof, do you?"
He sighed. "No, not yet. But Batman is looking into it."
"I'll bet he is! As a matter of fact, I've come by to give him something."
"You have?"
"Yes."
She sat in a chair. Then she unzipped and pulled off her boots! She gave them to him.
"There!"
He stared at her, wide-mouthed.
She smiled. "Hasn't anyone ever taken their shoes off in your office, before?"
"No, they haven't!"
"Well, I'm your first!' She got up—barefooted. "Give them to Batman. Tell him they're a present from me. Goodbye!"
Then she left.
2. The Caped Crusaders
"Holy Cat-Paws!," said Robin. He and Batman were in Gordon's office.
"Oh, here they are," said Gordon, and he gave Batman the boots. "Do you think maybe they're booby trapped?"
"I don't think so. She's honorable, in that regard. Thank you, Commissioner. We'll study them at the Bat Cave."
"Good luck, Batman."
They left.
3. The Bat Cave
Batman and Robin were in the Bat Cave. They each had one of Catwoman's boots.
"See anything, Batman?"
"Not yet. And you?"
"No. Hold on a moment!"
Robin had discovered a zipper on the side of the boot. Unzipping it, he pulled out a piece of paper.
"Good work, Robin!"
They looked at it together. It read:
"Hello, Batman! Come to Gotham Jewelers, where another gift awaits for you.
"Love, Cat."
"Think she'll give us the Victorian Cat back?," asked Robin.
"I doubt it. Still, we'd better go there right now."
"Yes, Batman!"
4. Catwoman's Shirt
Meanwhile, a woman entered the Gotham Jewelers. She was barefoot, and wore all black, including a mask.
A man greeted her. "Excuse me, all customers must wear shoes—Catwoman!"
She smiled. "Hello, Mark! Oh, and don't worry, I have no plans to rob your store—today!"
"Well then, why are you here? Do you want to buy something?"
"Me—buy jewelry?" She laughed. "Never! No, I've come here to give you something."
And with that, she took her shirt off, and gave it to the shocked Mark! She wore a black one-piece bathing suit, underneath.
"Give this to Batman and Robin; they'll be here later today. Bye!"
She left.
5. Caped Crusaders Again
"She took her shirt off, gave it to you, and told you to give it to us?." asked Batman.
"That's right!," said Mark. "Oh, here it is." He gave it to Batman.
"Holy Strip Tease!," said Robin. "What kind of game is Catwoman playing?"
"I don't know, but I intend to find out. To the Bat Cave!"
"Right, Batman!"
6. The Bat Cave Again
At the Bat Cave, they studied the shirt.
"Perhaps there's a secret pocket, like in the boots."
"A good assumption Robin. . . I see something!"
There was indeed a zipper on the right side. Batman unzipped it and pulled out another note. It read:
"Dear Batman,
"Wouldn't you've liked to have seen me take this shirt off!
"Meet me tonight at the Kit-Kat Klub at 9:00PM. Come alone; sorry, Robin the Boy Wonder isn't allowed! Oh, and you might want to bring along a swim suit. See you then!
"Love, Cat."
"Bring along a swim suit?" said Robin. "Whatever reason for?"
"If my mind serves me correctly, the Kit Kat Klub used to have female mud wrestling, before it closed last year."
"And I'm not invited!"
"Sorry, old chum!"
"I think I should still come along, as backup."
He nodded. "Good idea. OK, we still have a few hours. Let's eat dinner."
"Right, Batman."
7. Parking Lot
They parked in front of the Kit Kat Klub at 8:56PM.
"Now, remember, if I'm not back here by 9:30, you go into the club—but not before then!"
"Right, Batman. Good luck."
"Thank you."
He got out of the car.
8. The Kit Kat Klub
The front door was unlocked. Inside, the lights were on, and music was playing.
Catwoman greeted him. She was still barefoot and shirtless.
"Batman! Great to see you."
"My pleasure. Oh, I brought your boots and your shirt."
She smiled. "Thank you! You can put them on this table.
He did this.
"OK, Catwoman, what's your game?"
She smiled. "You don't beat around the bush, do you?"
"No, I don't!"
"All right. I recently bought this nightclub. I thought I might try going straight as a club owner."
"Congratulations."
"Thank you. And since this club used to hold mud wrestling, I thought I'd revive it. And I thought I'd start with a rematch between us."
He nodded. "I see! And what if I refuse?"
"Go right ahead. But perhaps this will interest you."
She pointed to a table. A small gold cat sculpture was on it.
"The Victorian gold cat."
"That's right. I propose a best of three pins. If you win, I give it back to you; if I win, you let me keep it."
He thought for a bit. "You don't have any of that knockout spray, do you?"
"Not this time, I swear."
He nodded. "All right."
She smiled. "Excellent!"
"One question: Why your public strip tease?"
"Merely as an 'attention getter.' I considered also taking my pants off somewhere, but decided against that."
He smiled. "Just as well."
"Come with me."
9. Kitten
She led him into a special room in the club. In the middle was a pit with brown-black mud in it. Sitting on one of the chairs on the side was a girl. She wore a black dress, and had a mask over her face.
"This is my little assistant Kitten. She'll serve as referee."
"Hi, Batman," she said.
"Hi, Miss Kitten."
"Did you bring a bathing suit?," ask Catwoman.
"No, but my pants are drip-dry. Oh, are there showers?"
"Of course. They're in that room." She pointed to a door.
"OK, Cat, let's get started."
She took her pants off, and he took his shirt and boots off. Then they got into the mud. Kitten took her shoes off and stood in the pit.
"Begin wrestling," she said.
10. First Pin
Catwoman got the first hold, but Batman was able to get out of it. They took turns coming on top, but at last he was the one with the pin.
"The first pin goes to Batman!," said Kitten.
11. Second Pin
Catwoman was more determined, this time. She got an early lead and continued at it. She made one hold which he got out of, but a minute later had another hold that stuck.
"The second pin goes to Catwoman."
12. Third Pin and Aftermath
This was the longest and toughest round. For awhile, one had an advantage, but then the other took over.
At one point, they stopped and stared at each other.
"The mud brings out your muscles well," said Catwoman.
He smiled. "Thank you!"
Suddenly, she grabbed him. He struggled, but she was able to get the pin.
"The third, and final, pin goes to Catwoman. You are the winner, Cat!"
They got up.
"I won fair and square!"
He nodded. "Yes, you did."
"And I get to keep the cat!"
"So it seems."
"You're not going to renege on your promise, are you?"
He sighed. "No, Catwoman. I am a man of my word."
She walked over to him and gave him a muddy hug and kiss."
Kitten smiled. "That's nice!"
"Holy Mud Pie!," said a voice.
Robin entered the room and was staring at them!
Catwoman sighed. "I figured you'd bring him!"
"He insisted. Robin, as you can see, we've been doing some wrestling."
He smiled. "I can see that! Oh, by the way, I found this in the main area."
He brought out the cat sculpture!
"Good work, Robin!," said Batman.
"Damn!," said Catwoman.
"I tell you what, Catwoman: I won't have you arrested for this theft. How about that?"
"Is that a promise?"
"Yes, Catwoman. I'm a man of my honor."
"Holy Scott-Free!"
"Robin, I have found that there are times when we must let a suspect go free. I think, in a few years, you'll understand that better."
He nodded. "I guess you're right, Batman."
There were towels on the sides. Kitten picked up some and gave them to Batman and Catwoman, and one for herself.
"Oh, this is my assistant Kitten," said Catwoman. "Kitten, this is Robin, the Boy Wonder."
"Pleased to meet you," said Robin.
She smiled. "My pleasure."
"Let's wash up," said Catwoman.
"Yes, Catwoman."
They went to the showers.
13, Robin and Kitten
Meanwhile, Kitten sat in one of the chairs and cleaned her muddy feet off with the towel. Robin sat next to her. He sighed.
"What's wrong, Robin?"
"Batman gets all the fun! Why couldn't I of wrestled against Catwoman?"
She smiled. "I'll wrestle with you, Robin!"
He also smiled!
14. Impromptu Match
Batman and Catwoman showered off together. They dried themselves, then went back to the room. There, they were treated to an interesting sight:
Robin and Kitten were wrestling together in the mud! Robin had taken his boots off.
As soon as Batman and Catwoman came out, they both stopped and stood up before them, looking very embarrassed!
Catwoman began laughing. Despite himself, Batman also laughed.
"You too can shower off when you're done," she said.
"Yes," said Batman. "Carry on."
15. End of the Affair
"Bruce Wayne will be very happy to have this back in the Gotham Collection," said Commissioner Gordon. Batman and Robin were back in his office. They had returned the Cat sculpture. "Thanks, Caped Crusaders."
"All in a day's work," said Batman.
"But Catwoman escaped?"
"Yes. She used one of her nine lives, alas."
"Holy Cat-Life!," said Robin.