Chapter one

"I made a complete fool of myself Shawn, I don't know what the heck I was thinking." Philip was pacing up and down the deck, disgusted that once again he had let his jealousy get the better of him. He didn't think he could miss Chloe so much but he did. He ached for her, how could love be so joyous and painful at the same time? He'd called her, wanting to apologize but just wanting to hear that beautiful soothing voice of hers. He hated how they had parted on the plane, so he'd called to try and fix things. And he just made it worse, he heard she was dining with Brady and he just lost it. His apology went straight downhill.

Shawn sighed and looked at his best friend, he'd never seen Philip Kiriakis, the all state in everything, so miserable. He had to admit that though he knew Philip loved Chloe, he still had doubts about their relationship. And who could blame him, with Chloe you didn't know what you were going to get. She was like a faucet, running both hot and cold.

"Philip, I told you to give the girl some space, man. You guys both need some time to heal. You know how Chloe is, she doesn't react to things like the rest of us." And with one look from Phil, he changed that last comment. "I'm not saying she is strange, just unique. It's going to take some time man. Hang in there, but we need our K-man back". He got up and put his on Philip's shoulders, surprising both Phil and himself.

"Look at you, man. We're on this gorgeous island, with lots of beautiful girls and here you are moping over Chloe. You can't stop thinking about her for one second to have some fun. You need to get your mind off her for a little bit. I mean, you can't change anything right now with the both of you in different countries."

Philip let out a frustrated sigh and ran his hand through his tousled sandy, blond hair. "Don't you think I know that? But that is easier said than done, forgetting Chloe or to stop loving her is to stop breathing. Loving her comes naturally to me, what am I going to do, Shawn? What am I going to do?" His friend asked desperately.

For the first time, Shawn was actually speechless. They leaned over the rail looking at the clear blue water below, that sparkled like jewels in the moonlight. He didn't know what to say, so he would be a good friend and just listen to him. Maybe confiding in someone would help clear things up for Philip. "I can just be here for you, Philip." That was all he could say.

Phil was tired of it all and just exploded on Shawn. "You see this is exactly what I was telling my Dad the other day. Everyone thinks my love for Chloe is like this disease that ought to be eradicated. It's over, I should just move on, right? After all we are just a bunch of teenagers and there will be other loves. But see it doesn't work that way, not when you have the real thing, Shawn. And I thought I did. She made me a better person. I felt so happy and alive with her, like I could do no wrong."

Shawn tried getting a word in edgewise, but Philip wouldn't let him. He was in this zone, and all his emotions and feelings came pouring out.

"I don't know it's like she made me feel things I've never felt before. But I got so wrapped up in my love for her that I totally lost focus of everything else in my life. Shawn, I feel like my entire life is falling apart. My parents are getting a divorce, and are at each other throats constantly. My father and Nicole, he shook his head as if to erase that image from his mind, I don't even want to think about what's going on there. I've asked him and they've both denied it but I'm sure there is something going on between the two of them."

Shawn was getting more than he bargained for, Victor and Nicole? No wonder Phil didn't know where he was coming or going these days.

As if reading Shawn's mind, Phil nodded his head, "yep, and it gets even worst. I caught my mom with another man in Paris and that started all of this. Chloe was the only one I could trust, I didn't want to be away from her. I didn't' want to lose her Shawn. So I started acting all possessive, and I hated it. But I didn't know what I was doing. I was holding unto her so tight that I ended up losing her because of it. I cared more about my reputation and what other people thought about me. Now I've lost the best thing in my life; the best thing that has ever happened to me because I didn't trust her." Phil turned away from Shawn, not wanting him to see the tears that were starting to form in his eyes.

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(Meanwhile back in Salem)

She sat in her bed thinking about the two guys in her life. How did things get so complicated? If anyone had told her that Chloe Lane, outcast at Salem High, would be thinking about her boy's troubles she would have laughed in their faces. But here she was, one year later mending her broken heart by spending time with Salem's resident bad boy, Brady Black. She should be happy, Philip was out of her life. It still hurt to even think about that night which changed her life forever. She was starting to believe in love and its' ironic that it took her breakup to realize how much she cared about Philip.

"Ugh, stop this, it's over between you and Philip." Chloe admonished herself out loud. She walked over to her stereo and popped in one of her favorite Operas. And that just made matters worse; she started thinking about her day today. She had been spending all her time with Brady, much to Nancy's displeasure. They had just gotten into another fight about "those Kiriakis men".

"Chloe didn't I tell you to stay away from Brady, he is nothing but bad news. Did you know he dropped out of college....

Chloe had heard enough. " Mother that is none of your business, are you going to keep me away from every member of the male species? I'm a big girl and you can't tell me who to be and not be friends with."

Honey, I'm just looking out for your best interest. I told you to stay away from Philip Kiriakis and look where that got you." The minute Nancy said those words she regretted them and the look on Chloe's face confirmed her fears.

"Thank you mother, once again you had to lord your intelligence over me. Philip dumped me, what do you want a free trip to Bermuda because you were right?" And what that comment she ran upstairs to her room and burst into tears. .

She sighed, Brady Black, what was she going to do about him? He's handsome, charming, has a great sense of humor and they had similar taste in Opera. He had surprised her by making her smile today and taking her mind of Philip. She loved spending time with him, with none of the emotional attachment like she had with Philip. But yet she couldn't stop thinking of Philip when she was alone by herself and noone to tell her to get over him, he's bad news or you guys were only teenagers...you'll only find someone else.

She was sick of everyone acting like they were in that relationship with Philip and her. She was sick of everyone trivializing what they had. But what did they have, was it love? If it was, why couldn't she tell him how she felt? She told everyone even Brady that she loved Philip, yet she couldn't even tell the one person who desperately wanted to hear it.

She shook her head, what difference does it make anyway. It was over between her and Philip, over. The phone rang interrupting her thoughts, thankfully. She leaned over her nightstand and attempted to pick up her phone but something stopped her. She didn't feel like talking to anyone tonight, so she just let it ring. Her answering machine picked it up as Philip's raspy voice brought all her memories flooding back.

"Umm, Hi Chloe. This is a blessing in disguise I guess. Instead of hanging up on me you can just delete this message. But before you do, please listen to what I have to say."

He had her full attention, as Chloe was now sitting on her bed, hugging her pillow to her chest.

"I don't know why I keep doing this to us, Chloe. I called to apologize to you about what happened on the plane and once again I let my jealousy get the best of me. I had no right to accuse you of having something with Brady. I lost that right when I didn't believe in you the night of the dance. I just wanted to say you've changed my life forever, Chloe. I am a better person for having known you. See, everyone has these expectations for me. My father expects me to graduate from an Ivy League college and run Titan someday. He hasn't even asked me if that is what I want or not. My friends, who I now know, aren't really my friends just like me for who they perceive me to be. But you Chloe, you loved me faults and all. You didn't care about my money or whether I had just made all state in basketball. All that didn't matter to you; you just loved me, Philip Kiriakis. And I will always be thankful to you because of that. I know you never told me that you loved me but I believed it, I felt it whenever we were together. When you kissed me, when you would brush back that strand of hair that kept falling unto my forehead", he laughed.

Chloe smiled, she loved touching his hair.

"I hope it wasn't all in my head, Chloe. I've lost you and it's all my fault. But the one thing I can deal with is knowing that during the year we spend together that this beautiful girl inside and out loved me. I was so privileged to be loved by such a wonderful person. I can let you go knowing all this because I love you so much and your happiness is the most important thing to me, Chloe. I know it's over and we can't go back but we can move forward. I hope we can someday be friends. But if you didn't get anything from our relationship, understand this Chloe. You were loved, believe me, you were loved." He paused for what seemed like an eternity. "Goodbye Chloe"

And with that Phlilip hung up and Chloe was speechless, tears running down her cheeks. She wanted to talk to him so bad but pride kept her from picking up that phone. All she could do was listen to Philip say such beautiful words to her. And now she felt like her heart was breaking into a million pieces. He sounded so...final. Like he had given up on her. She knew it was over but Philip saying it broke her heart.

"Oh Philip, " she cried, "You were loved, if only you knew how much." With heart wrenching sobs shaking her body, Chloe lane cried herself to sleep for the second time in two days.

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"You were loved, believe me, you were loved. Goodbye Chloe". And with that Phil hung up his cell phone. He sat on his bed and held his face in his hands, his tears threatening to fall. Who would have thought, Philip Kiriakis crying over a girl? But it was killing him inside to let Chloe go but after his talk with Shawn he knew he had to get on with his life. To be Philip Kiriakis not her boyfriend. His entire life revolved around her and he needed to learn to live life without Chloe Lane in it. He had no choice. And with that he started to sob. He put his hands to his mouth to cover the sound but it was too late, someone had heard him.

Shawn was coming to Philip's room to see how he was doing. After their talk, he knew Philip had some tough decisions to make and they all involved Chloe. He was surprised when he heard someone crying, he got closer and saw Phil on his bed, face in his hands, sobbing. At first he didn't know what to do. He had never seen his friend like this before and this was all awkward and new to him. He didn't want him to feel like he was invading his privacy but he had to do something. So he walked to Phil and tapped his shoulder.

"It's going to be okay, Philip, its' all for the best. If you and Chloe are meant to be, you guys will get back together." Philip hastily wiped his face and looked up at Shawn, clearly embarrassed his friend had just caught him crying.

" Great, I'm never going to live this one down am I? Now you've got something to blackmail me with forever," Philip laughed.

"You know I'm not like that, Phil."

"I know, I know. But you were right, man. I need to get on with my life. I called Chloe and told her that I knew it was over and that I would never bother her again. This is for the best; it's not to say she was going to take me back anyway. Yeah, it is for the best," he said softly, choking back tears once again.

Shawn wondered who his friend was trying to convince him or himself. He realized just how much Philip loved Chloe and how he was hurting. "Look Phil, you don't have to pretend with me, I know you love her and it must be killing you to let her go." Philip could only nod his head in agreement and the tears started spilling freely. Shawn got up and gave his friend a hug, totally helpless as to what else to do.

Philip hugged him back. "Shawn?"

"Yeah Phil?"

"Thanks." And that was all he needed to say because both guys knew what it meant and their friendship had taken on a whole new meaning tonight.

Meanwhile Belle Black smiled at the scene before her eyes. She was passing on her way to the deck when she had seen Shawn embraced a clearly heartbroken Philip. She didn't want to intrude but she was so touched by their display of friendship. She closed the door quietly and sighed, Shawn Brady kept showing her reasons why he was the right guy for her.

To be continued.