Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.
A/N: This is the first Harry Potter story I've written so far. It is obviously AU because people who died in the books are not dead in my story. But other than that, I want to keep it as close to the original as possible. Please tell me if I'm getting the characterizations ( or anything else) wrong.
It was over.
Harry kept repeating that thought in his mind, willing himself to believe it, but it was proving difficult. Only slowly was he coming down from the adrenaline high of the battle, and he was not sure he preferred what would follow to the stress that was only slowly leaving his body.
There would be happiness, he had no doubt of that, but first would come the grieving.
While the others had started the first round of celebration, he was in a deserted part of the castle with Ron and Hermione, who had followed him at his request, first to Dumbledore's... no, to the headmaster's office, and afterwards, where he was leading them.
"Look, guys, if you wanted to return to the Great Hall..."
"No, Harry, that's fine." Ron sounded sombre.
Before, he and Hermione had looked a lot cheerier, but now, away from the company of the gathered survivors, both their moods seemed as dimmed as Harry's.
A knowing look passed between them.
"There was just too much noise there to reflect on everything that's happened." Hermione had a pained expression. "But we need to do this. No point putting it off."
They all looked down.
"I wanted to see..." Harry could not say it. He tried again. "I wanted to say goodbye in private. You know, before the others calm down and..."
"I know where they took them." Ron's voice was barely above a whisper. "We followed..." He could not bring himself to say Fred's name either.
"Let's go then," said Harry just as quietly.
They walked down to the dungeons in silence. Even though it was early morning, the corridors were dark in that part of the castle.
"It's down here. There were a few unused classrooms..." Even though he spoke softly, Ron's voice sounded unnecessarily loud, out of place somehow.
It was freezing cold in the room, even more so than in the rest of the dungeons. The bodies were lined next to each other, with barely any space between them to walk through. There were far too many.
Ron swallowed. "They're... Everyone had to take care of their own. They're all together over here." He went over to Fred's body, followed by his friends. Harry was not sure which was worse: seeing Fred dead or witnessing Ron's pain. Hermione comforted her boyfriend of one day, and Harry turned to the other two.
He knelt next to Remus, passing his gaze over his face. Harry still had the image of the scar-free Remus walking with him in his mind, making it even more difficult to look at the scarred face.
Remus' brows twitched all of a sudden. Harry gasped and stumbled back.
Both of his friends turned to him, concerned.
"Harry?"
"Are you all right?"
But before Harry could reply, Remus groaned and sat up. "Harry? What's going on? Where are we?"
Ron and Hermione shrieked and clutched at each other.
"Remus, now looking truly confused, tried once again. "Harry, what happened?"
Harry was frozen, unable to answer, so Ron spoke instead. "You're supposed to be dead. Why aren't you dead?" His voice steadily got more and more hysterical.
Harry started muttering to himself, "Merlin what did I do...?"
Remus, realizing that something was not right, tried to remember what had happened. "I was fighting Dolohov, and I could hear Dora fighting Bellatrix. And then I saw her fall and turned to look, and Dolohov... Merlin, Dora!" Panicked, his hand shot around, landing on his wife lying next to him. He touched her throat, then started to shake her. "Dora? Dora, wake up."
"She is dead, Remus," Harry spoke at last.
Remus looked at him, brows drawn together. "No, she is not. I can feel her pulse. Though, it seems very weak..."
Hermione, who seemed to have recovered somewhat, inched over to her, her hand extended in front of her, ready to draw it back at any moment. Hesitantly, she touched Tonks' throat. Then she turned back to her friends, looking somewhere between incredulous and horrified. "He's right. She's alive."
"But that can't be. I mean I didn't—" Harry broke off. It was too late, of course. He had his friends' undivided attention.
"Harry?"
"What do you mean?"
He tried to swallow, his mouth suddenly dry. Then he told them about the Resurrection Stone inside the snitch and his 'little walk' in the forest.
Hermione looked truly horrified now. "Harry, how could you? You know the stone should never be used—"
"I remember that..." Remus interrupted her, then cleared his throat to cover the awkwardness as he suddenly found all three teenagers staring at him with rapt attention. "Uh, I have to say, Harry, I have no idea what exactly you're talking about. But I remember... I thought it was a dream... Your parents, James and Lily were there, and Sirius... I thought I was dead. I mean, what with the company, and all. I remembered he-who-must-not-be—"
"Voldemort," interrupted Harry.
Remus drew in a sharp breath. "Harry! The name's jinxed. You shouldn't..." He trailed off, at the sight of the unconcerned and amused faces of the teenagers.
"Oh, right. You don't know—" started Hermione.
"Voldemort is dead!" Ron interrupted her, sounding like an overeager child.
"So, does that mean... Did we...?"
"We won. We're inside Hogwarts now." Something like hope was starting to fill Harry's voice. "You're really alive? You're the same Remus you used to be? I mean, you don't feel like going back to being... you know? But I still don't understand. Was it me? Did I...?"
"Harry, I don't think I really died. As I was saying, I remember Voldemort demanding you give yourself up. And then I was in the forest, with your parents. They told me you were about to do just that, and we were going to walk with you. James was saying how proud he was of you, and that he was happy to see me again."
Harry's eyes looked suspiciously bright now, and Remus considerately averted his eyes. His brows drew together, trying to remember the details. "It was really strange. Not quite like a dream. I remember feeling sad that you were about to... I could not understand why it didn't seem to bother your parents. And Lily said I didn't understand, that the living just could not understand, but she said that I shouldn't worry because everything would be all right. James then told me that I should be glad because you were going to save us."
"'The living'... She said you were 'the living'. You're really alive, then. For good." Harry sounded ridiculously relieved. He wanted to say how happy he felt, how fantastic it was to have Remus returned to him. After all the death and destruction they had witnessed that day it seemed like the greatest gift of all. He wanted to say all that, but all he could manage was a lame "Remus, I... I'm glad."
Remus seemed to have understood, though, because he stood up, walked over on shaky legs, and hugged him. It felt a little awkward, with both of them unused to human contact.
Remus went back to his wife after that. "Is she really alive?" Hermione asked him.
"She is. But she's not waking up." He sounded concerned.
Hermione bit her lip. "I was wondering... Harry's father said he was going to save us. Including you, right?"
Remus nodded.
Hermione then cast a spell that neither Harry nor Ron had seen before. Little glowing dots, like fireflies, appeared in front of all their faces, and on top of Tonks, Fred and another body some distance away.
Ron, looking bewildered, tried to move away from the already fading light dancing in front of him. "Hermione, what was that?"
"I cast a spell that shows who's alive," Hermione told him distractedly, already kneeling at Fred's side.
It only took them one moment to realise what she was saying, then they were rushing over to her side.
"You mean, he's—"Ron could not say it, holding his breath for her answer.
Hermione smiled at him, her eyes full of understanding. "Yes, Ron. He's also alive. Though, he doesn't seem to be waking up, either." Her brows drawn together, she looked around, her eyes stopping at the last fading light. "And someone else seems to be alive, as well. Though, I don't know who..."
"Colin Creevey," said Harry with conviction.
Hermione went over to confirm his words and then came back. "It is Colin Creevey. How did you know?"
Harry again had the undivided attention of everyone present. "Hermione, I think we both had the same idea just now. It must have something to do with me sacrificing myself. It's the only thing that protects against the Killing Curse. It's what happened when my mother died, and the same thing happened just now. People stopped dying once I—"
"That's what I thought, too. So it makes sense that people close to you didn't die. But why Creevey?"
"They were just dragging him in when I was leaving the castle. I knew about Fred, of course, and I saw Remus and Tonks before I went up to Dumbledore's office. Then, after I had seen the memories, I didn't want to see any more death. I mean, I was going to give myself up, I didn't want any more grief than that.
"I tried not to see what was going on; tried to avoid everyone. But I just ran into him. Neville was there, he told me he had snuck back in to fight. He looked so small..." He broke off.
"Oh, Harry..." Hermione hugged him. Ron patted him on the shoulder, looking sympathetic.
"Harry, how wonderfully brave you have been—" Remus' gaze was so full of regard and affection that Harry had to sink his eyes before it.
"Remus, really, that's... I mean..." Harry stuttered embarrassed.
"So what about Fred?" asked Ron. "And the others," he added as an afterthought. Harry was happy to have something to take the attention away from him.
Hermione worried her lower lip, before coming to a decision. "I think maybe we should ask Madam Pomfrey."