"DJ Atomika here, broadcasting LIVE from peak 1 of EA Big Mountain. All you riders best be careful out there today, the snow is light and ready for an avalanche. My father...he didn't listen to my advice all those years ago...

Now who's up for some Run DMC?"

Author's note: Run DMC did play but was interrupted 1 minute and 40 seconds in. The transmission was then looped from 10th November at 8:04 am until the 23rd of March when the snow melted, revealing the position of the transmission station. Due to the nature of the building, the final moments of DJ Atomika were recorded while the song was still playing. The following is a transcript of those last minutes.

A snowboarder named Elise Riggs: Aww you're playing our song.

A DJ called DJ Atomika: Err yeah. You do know I only have 2 records right?

Elise: How can you run a radio station with only 2 songs?

Atomika: With my endless wit and charm baby.

Elise: Well what's the other song?

Atomika: Paradise City by Guns N' Roses.

Elise: Ooh that's mine and Moby's song!

Atomika: Moby...is he that bald, vegan, commercial musician or that scary, beefy nigga?

Elise: The second one.

Atomika: Shit. I could've beaten up that scrawny four-eyed DJ. Ah fuck the black Moby anyway.

Elise: Well that's sort of what I need to talk to you about. Last night after you left the party early, I got it on with Moby.

Atomika: oh my god no. Is that what you came here to tell me? That it's over between us?

There is a rumbling and crashing

Elise: Atomika where are you? Are you OK?

There is a click. It was probably a lightswitch.

Atomika: Yeah. We must have been snowed in by an avalanche.

Elise: oh my god no. Wait don't open the window! You'll let the rest of the snow in and bury us! Fuckin' dumbass.

Atomika: We can't just sit here like this, Elise.

Elise: Yes we can. We could eat the snow. Snow cone?

Atomika: No

Elise: Build some snowmen?

Atomika: No

Elise: Make snow angels?

Atomika: No

Elise: Snowball fight?

Atomika: No

Elise: Well there is one more thing we could try...

Atomika: Elise if you mention the snow one more time I will fucking end you.

Elise: No. If we get our uber bars up then we can blast our way out of here.

Atomika: I can't do a backflip in the 5x5ft room.

Elise: Well maybe these will get it up.

unzipping

Atomika: Ooh maybe.

Elise: This is actually very cold, can I put my top back on now?

Atomika: Well I suppose, but now you have doomed us here forever.

Elise: We could still do it DJ Atomika!

Atomika: I dunno. Have you even showered since you fucked Moby yesterday? I could get AIDS.

Elise: 1. Every black man doesn't automatically have AIDS and b; you can't wash away AIDS.

Atomika: Oh great now they tell me. OK come here lets give this a shot.

Sexy arousing moans are heard for a good while. The sounds can best be described as me and your mother.

Atomika: Oh it's no use. My testicles have been shooting cumcicles for the last five minutes and I don't feel any uberer.

Falling snow and squeaks are heard

Atomika: What was that noise? Did I get your uber bar up?

Elise: That'd be the day.

Atomika: What if it's a polar bear?!

Elise: On a mountain?

Atomika: Maybe it escaped from a zoo.

Elise: A mountain zoo?

A third, blacker, voice: A polar bear? You're fuckin shittin me.

Atomika: Who the fuck said that?

Black voice: Moby baby! I don't know about you mother fuckaz, but I'd like to go snowboarding.

There were cheers all around and no bodies were recovered from the cabin. The tape recording went on for another 4 hours of silence except for a wild animal sniffing and gnawing on the microphone for a few minutes. Maybe it was a polar bear.