Disclaimer : I definitely do not own Heroes, or any of it's wonderful characters. But the crazy psycho was all us.
Authors Note PLEASE READ: Dear readers, thanks for reading this. This is just a short comedy about Heroes my brother and I wrote together, we had just been joking around and decided to write this, it's really really really not my usual style, but me and my brother had fun which is what counts right? I sure hope you enjoy it as much as we did, it is really truly ridiculous! thanks! Love WillowEchoRiver.
Road Trip, a One Chapter Comedy by WillowEchoRiver and her brother,
Matt looked out the restaurant window and saw a man standing by their car in the parking lot, "Hey Daphne, do you have any idea why that guy would be standing by our car?"
Daphne looked over the back of the booth they were sitting in the restaurant, and out the window, to see what Matt was looking at. "No, I'm gonna go find out." She jumped to her feet and was about to dash off when Matt cautioned. "No running Daphne, we're in public."
"Oh, right." She said, forcing herself to walk at a normal pace out to the car. As she walked outside she saw the man pull something out of this pocket and put in the key hole.
"Hey! You! What do you think you're doing to our car?" Daphne said, folding her arms. the man took a look at her, smiled, then he turned and ran through the parking lot shouting "FIRE!!!" every one looked towards Daphne to see what was happening. Daphne let out a grumble under her breath, and ran after the guy ---At normal speed of course---, but as soon as they were out of sight of the other people, she dashed after him at full speed and pinned him to the ground. "Better explain yourself. " She threatened, rather angry.
Out of nowhere a dog jumped out and bit her arm, she pulled her arm away again and the man ran off yelling "HELP SHES TRYING TO KILL ME!"
Thankfully, no one was around to hear it, by this time Daphne was very angry, and the man had jumped over a fence, Daphne ran after him, trying to ignore her bleeding arm...That had been one vicious dog. Finally she managed to tackle him again. "Tell. Me. Who. You. Are. And. What. You. Want." She said this very slowly, holding back her anger.
There was a bark and the same Dog jumped over the fence and started walking towards her licking his lips. By this time Daphne figured there was something up with this guy and the dog, so she said threateningly. "Call off your dog, and we'll have a non-violent chat." But she didn't move a muscle.
The dog walked up and peed on her the sat down and looked like it had just told a funny joke, the man laughed "He peed on you! You smell like dog pee!"
Daphne had had enough, she punched him straight on the face, grabbed him, and zoomed off back to the restaurant. She dragged the man into the restaurant where Matt was waiting, it must have been an odd sight to see, Daphne's arm bleeding and smelling of something odd, and the man whose nose was now bleeding from Daphne's punch.
He sat down at her place and started to eat her pancake. "This is good you should try some...." He said.
Daphne glared at him, "I would have tried some, since I did order it, except that you are eating it!"
Matt stared at them, "Daphne whats going on?"
"I don't know how he did it, but he had a dog attack me.....And pee on me." She said, throwing a glare at the guy. "Whats your name anyway?"
"Matt." Said the guy through a mouthful of pancake.
"Hey! That's my name too!" Said Matt, looking rather amused, he caught the look of pure hatred for the guy on Daphne's face though, and said. "I'm sorry the dog hurt....and peed on you Daphne."
"I'm not you smell better now" the guy said "So" he added when he finished the food "when do we leave?"
"We leave now, you stay here." Daphne said, pointing from herself to Matt, Matt Parkman that is...
"Nah, I'm coming." The guy answered.
"Why should we let you?" Daphne questioned, Matt merely watched, looking slightly amused.
"Because, we're all being followed, I can get them off the trail though." The guy answered, looking smug. He wiped off his mouth and got in the drivers seat of the car and honked "Well we better go with him" Matt said to Daphne, who grudgingly agreed. They got into the back seat of the car, and the guy said, "Ugh, my nose is still bleeding!"
"Don't get any on the car, it's a rental." Daphne said, annoyed. And the Guy let it drip on the seat on purpose. He started driving and out of nowhere cows came on to the road behind them...."Now we can't be followed" he said
"So you can control animals huh?" Matt asked.
"Matt, stop fraternizing with the enemy." Daphne said, scolding.
"Hiro thinks your the enemy" Matt said helpfully.
"What does Hiro have to do with this....Whoa, weird! Hey, man, pull over!" Daphne said, refusing to call the guy Matt, she had seen Hiro and Ando out side the window, which was a very odd coincidence.
He pulled over "Get into the back" he yelled at them.
"Nemesis! Matt Parkman! Hello!" Hiro said enthusiastically.
"Why do we have to sit in the back?" Ando questioned, curiously.
"Seriously man, we can't all fit back here, this is a three seat car, there is four of us. Let Ando or Hiro sit in front."
"IN THE BACK!!!" he yelled.
Ando and Hiro got into the back, they drove a bit more before they pulled over again.
Daphne was grumbling something about 'Our own rental car' and 'complete maniac' when they pulled over. "What are you doing now?!" She asked the guy. She couldn't take much more of this.
"Oh I had to let my turtle friend here in." The Guy said. The turtle got in and they started to drive again, a little bit later they stopped again.
Daphne just sighed, seeming to give up. "What are we doing this time?"
A skunk got into the car, that's when Daphne had had enough. "Okay, Pull over, I'm out of here. "
"Yes, uh, what exactly are we doing here again Ando?" Hiro asked Ando, who said, "Well, we we're stranded."
"Don't leave Daph" both Matts said together. there was a long time were now one said anything the matt number two said "My skunk friend farted."
"Matt......" Daphne begged, "Please, please, lets just leave." She said, miserable.
"Well, uh....We have Hero and uh, saving the world things to do so we should go!" Hiro said, and Ando nodded, and they both hopped out of the car. "Yeah! Thanks a lot!" Daphne called. "How could they leave me here with HIM!" Daphne moaned.
"I'm sitting right here jerk" he said starting to drive again, a bit later Matt Parkman fell asleep.
Daphne almost panicked. "Matt." She said, shaking him. "Matt! Wake up! I need SOMEONE sane!"
"It's just the two of us now" The other Matt said taking his hands off the wheel and looking back at her.
"You. Are. A. Maniac! Both hands on the wheel Psycho!" Daphne said, before attempting to wake Matt up again.
"Don't worry my friends will drive" he said climbing into the back.
"Okay I"m getting a restraining order!" Daphne said, there was a moment when the car was stopped moving. And she took that opportunity to grab Matt, and race out of the car.
Two month's later Daphne was at home and went outside to get the mail and there was only one letter she opened it and read : Dear Daphne I meant to send you this letter sooner, but now I have your address so I can send you letters.
P.S. My skunk friend farted..