My name is Jimmy Boland and I am a fighter. I'm thirteen years old and I've never been more afraid than I am today. I would never admit it, not out loud, but I am absolutely terrified.
I miss my mom. I miss the way she used to sneak into my room to tuck me in. She would tiptoe toward my bed thinking I was asleep and kiss me on the forehead. I miss the way her lips felt every night. They brought me more comfort than she could ever know. Those kisses erased the teasing voices of the jerks that made fun of me for being short or fat or whatever else they didn't like that day. She erased the girl who didn't like me back…no matter how much I liked her. Nothing erases the fear that the Skitters bring, not anymore.
I miss my sister. I miss the way she tossed her sheet of white-blonde hair over her shoulder. I miss the way she bugged me and my friends at school, thinking it was cool or whatever. I miss the way we argued over stupid little things like who'd sit shotgun when Mom drove us to school or who had to clear the table after dinner. I miss her tinkling laughter and her braces-filled smile. I even miss the way she whined when she didn't get her way.
I miss my dad. I miss his sharp voice telling me that I could do better when he knew I wasn't giving my all. I miss his harsh criticisms of my performance on the football field. I miss his graying beard and his salt and pepper hair. I miss watching his eyes light up when my mom got home and the way he smelled after shaving.
I miss my family.
I'll admit at first I didn't understand why Mason was having us write these stupid journals. I mean, he said something about the fighters needing to have some sort of outlet to express their true feelings. I honestly didn't buy it, not at first. But now…I do feel better, I also kind of feel like a pussy but it's not like anyone will ever read this. God, I think I'd die if anyone ever saw this. Alright my hand's starting to cramp. I don't think I ever wrote this much when I was actually in school.
Jimmy Boland. 2nd Massachusetts Resistance. Entry 1.
I put down the pen Tom had given me and slipped the marble notebook into the slit I'd cut in the underside of my mattress. The same slit also held the only family photo I'd been able to find in the rubble of my house. Most of the homes around hadn't been touched. The occupants had simply been wiped out. Not mine though. Mine had been destroyed. It was like those aliens wanted me to have to seethat there wasn't a thing left for me of the way things used to be. They didn't want me to be able to stand in the circle of my cul-de-sac and look up at the red brick building I had grown up in like I had hundreds of times before the invasion.
I stepped out into the nearly empty hallway of the school, realizing it was about lunch time. Everyone must be in the cafeteria trying to get their fill. Rations were tight and we all knew it was only going to get worse. My stomach started to grumble and I began to make my way towards the cafeteria.
"Hey! Jimmy wait up!" I rolled my eyes recognizing the clipped voice of the Tinker Tailor Skitter Spy, Ben Mason. I ignored him hoping that he'd get the hint and leave me alone. He didn't. I heard his pattering footsteps increase in speed as he jogged to catch up with me. I clenched and unclenched my fists. Taking a deep breath I put a fake smile on as Ben slowed to a walk beside me.
"Hey Ben," I said softly.
"'You going to lunch?" I nodded, biting back the urge to reply with a sarcastic 'Obviously,"
"Me too."
Ben opened and closed his mouth a couple of times before he finally gave up and let us walk in silence. I was able to lose Ben for a precious few minutes when we entered the crowded café. He managed to find me again once I'd gotten my food. I don't know if it was hunger or exhaustion or the fact that I was in the middle of an alien apocalypse with nothing but my dog, Nemo, but I finally lost it on Ben.
"Ben. Leave. Me. Alone." I snarled.
A couple of heads had turned at nearby tables and I felt my face heat up. Quickly, I turned on my heel to get away. One of those heads had belonged to Hal Mason and I rather like my face intact. Everyone knows Hal has to fight Ben's battles for him. I hadn't made it more than four steps before I ran smack into someone, spilling my opened milk carton all down their front. My already reddened cheeks warmed even more as I looked up into the clear skinned face of one of the Razor Back girls that had been rescued with Ben. I'd seen her before but never this close up. Her green eyes were like an owl's; big, round, and wide with long dark lashes framing them. Her eyebrows were highly arched, wisps. Her nose was small and pointed, turning up at the tip. A sprinkling of freckles doused the bridge. Her mouth was small with unnaturally pink lips. She was beautiful but it was her hair that got me; it was platinum blonde and very fine. Exactly like Sarah's.
"You're an ass," she said as bluntly as one would say that your shoes were untied.
"Er…" was all I managed to get out. She looked like my sister. I felt prickles behind my eyes as they started to wet.
"What did Ben ever do to you?" she spoke much more crossly.
"I d-didn't m-mean t-t-to say that…It's just…" I trailed off intelligence had completely abandoned me.
"What? You have a tough past? Is that it?" her voice dripped of false sympathy before she finished with a harsh: "Well so do we all. Get over yourself Jimmy Boland. You may be a fighter but that doesn't give you the right to be a downright jackass. Need I remind you that had things been different than they were, you could've had razors in your back too?" She walked away from me and towards Ben. I watched her whisper something in his ear before they left the room together. She was leading him with their hands entwined.
Juneau. Her name was Juneau. You'd think that having her yell at me like that would've changed my opinion on the Skitter spawn wouldn't you? Well it didn't. And it only intensified my utter dislike of Benjamin Mason.
AN: Yeah, this is really bad. I'll keep going if there's demand for it but mostly I wanted there to be a Jimmy story in the fandom seeing as he is my fave character. Well REVIEW!