That's How Life Goes

Summary: June, the Great Leslie's unknown younger half-sister, is kidnapped by Professor Fate!

Rating: k plus

A/N: AND ABSOLUTELY NO FLAMES!!

June leaned over the sink, muttering to herself. "You'd think that with all the money Leslie has, he'd hire a maid or housekeeper or something. But no, he has me do all the work instead! While he goes off racing and having adventures, I'm stuck here. Washing dishes." She put a plate on the counter for emphasis. June groaned as she heard the door open and close, then the tell-tale voice of her half-brother.

"June! Where are you?"

"Kitchen," June shouted back.

Leslie appeared in the kitchen with a beautiful, dark-haired lady behind him. "June, this is Maggie Dubois, my wife."

"You got married?" June was rather shocked to hear this. Her half-brother didn't seem the marrying type.

"Yes, I got married. Maggie, this is June, my half-sister." Leslie put an affectionate arm around his new wife, and they shared a romantic smile.

"You mean slave," June muttered under her breath.

"What was that?" Leslie asked angrily.

"You know perfectly well what I said! I'm stuck doing the dishes, laundry, dusting, mopping and window-washing around here! And I'm not even paid! If that doesn't make me a slave, what does?" June shouted angrily back.

"You make her do the housework?" Maggie asked indignantly. She glared at her husband. "How horrid! We'll get a housekeeper tomorrow, June," she said to the girl. June smiled at Maggie. She liked the spunky young woman a lot.

"We will not get a housekeeper if I don't want to! I won't have my authority undermined!" Leslie said, showing all the signs of throwing a hissy fit.

"We are getting a housekeeper or maid and that's final," Maggie replied primly. The two began fighting, and June made her escape.

"I'm going to my room," she said to no one in particular, and walked upstairs. "The Great Leslie indeed," she muttered to herself. "More like the Horrid Leslie. More like a slave-driver, rather." She closed her door behind her and looked at a picture of her late mother. "This isn't how you'd want me to be treated, Mother," she said softly. "You wouldn't have wanted this for me."

June slipped into her nightdress, which was brown and looked like a normal dress, and burrowed into her covers. Even if Leslie did make her do the cleaning, at least he provided her with nice clothes and a good bed, and her own room. He really wasn't that bad, she had to admit to herself. "I hope something happens tonight so that I don't have to do the cleaning tomorrow," June whispered. She said her prayers and drifted off to sleep.

While the young woman dreamed innocently of housekeepers and maids, two dark forms climbed in the window. "Terrific, she's asleep," one said in a soft voice. "Are you sure this is a good idea, Professor? She's just a girl, after all."

The second form laughed. "Yes, Max, I'm sure. If we take her, Leslie will come after her and I'll have my revenge!" The first form didn't question the second's authority, so they just put a sweet-smelling rag over June's face, to keep her asleep, and gently took her out the window.

A few minutes later, Leslie came into June's room to apologize. "June, I'm sorry-June?" He spotted the open window and a black car driving off. "Maggie!" He shouted, running out of his younger sister's room, "They've taken June!"


The next morning, June woke up in a comfortable position in the back seat of a black car. Sitting up, she looked around in shock. Two men sat in the front seat, and June half-wondered who they were before it hit her: "Hey! Something happened! No housework!"

Fate nearly drove off the road in shock, as he hadn't expected the sudden noise. "Be quiet, young lady," he muttered darkly.

"I will not," June said haughtily. "It's a free country. Now where am I, and where are we going?"

"Well," Max started, but Fate shot him a glare. "What? She's just a girl, Professor. She does have the right to know and besides, where would she go? She's chained to the car."

Fate sighed resignedly. "Very well," he consented. "Go ahead and tell her."

Max turned around in the seat. "We're kidnapping you to get back at Leslie for winning the race from Paris to the New York. The Professor figured that if we took you, Leslie would come after you and we could have our revenge."

June just grinned, making both Max and Professor Fate stare at her in shock. "I hate to break it to you, but Leslie and I are only half-siblings and we never got along very well. He's probably happy to have me off his hands. One less mouth to feed, you know," June added saucily.

Fate exploded. "You mean that I went through all the trouble of kidnapping you...just to find out that I didn't have to go through all the trouble of kidnapping you!?"

June hid a smile behind her hand. "That's what I mean, Professor. Sorry to burst your bubble."

Fate yelled for about a minute. "He's always like this in the mornings," Max clarified for June. "I'm really not sure why." June just nodded, and they both watched Fate as he tried to calm himself down. Finally, he got a hold of himself.

"Hmm," he said thoughtfully to his companion, "I think we'll keep her anyway, Max, just in case Leslie does come after us. Maggie might make him, after all."

"You can't do that!" June said, her eyes wide with shock. "I'll find a way to escape. I may not be fully Leslie's sister, but I have some of the same genes! I'll think of something!"

Fate and Max just chuckled as June steamed angrily in the back seat. "She's a fiery one," Fate remarked to Max, who nodded, glancing at June and smiling slightly. She glared angrily back.

"Just you wait, Maximilian," June muttered darkly. "I'll find a way to wipe that smirk off your face!"


The morning passed slowly. June sat in the back seat, bored to death. The two men didn't talk much. Finally, she decided to formulate an escape plan. Still acting bored, June began to work at the knots that tied her ankle to the car. A few hours later, when Fate stopped to switch drivers, June leaped awkwardly from the car, hiked her skirt up to mid-calf and tore off in no particular direction.

Max's reaction was quick. He instantly shot off after her, while Fate vented his rage on a car tire, then hopped around holding his foot.

June had no idea where they were. Nothing looked familiar, since she hadn't gotten out that much, but she was determined to find some kind of town where she could blend in and escape, then get back to Leslie. Even he was better than Fate and Max. June went about a mile, alternating between running and walking as quickly as she could, before she saw a stream. Dropping to her knees beside it, she took a long drink, then splashed into it. Heading downstream, she tried not to disturb any of the plants, because that would leave a traceable path. She had to rest every once in a while, as she wasn't used to running for her freedom. After all, this was the first time she'd been kidnapped.

She'd gone another mile or so when she heard shouting. Listening carefully, she recognized Fate's voice. June rolled her eyes and went cautiously around a bend in the stream. Immediately, she was grabbed. Max hooked an arm around her waist and threw her over his shoulder, then proceeded to carry her back to the car. Without realizing it, June had gone full circle by following the stream. June protested loudly the entire trip back to the car.

"Let go of me, you little rat!" She shrieked indignantly. "I don't care if Leslie treated me like a maid! At least I wasn't a prisoner!" Max ignored her, so June tried a different tactic. "Please, would you put me down?" She batted her eyes innocently at Max's back, forgetting that he couldn't see her since she was facing backwards.

Max snorted. "I'm not an idiot, even if the Professor calls me one. I wasn't born yesterday and I have been around the bush a few times. I'm not putting you down." June sighed helplessly.

They arrived back at the car, and Fate glared at them. Rather, at June. "You're a pain in the posterior, young lady," he said severely. "Max, handcuff her wrist to something." Max obliged, locking the handcuffs around June's slim wrist, then a metal support on the side of the car.

"She won't get away this time, Professor," he said to Fate. "It's harder to escape those. Although Leslie managed."

"She's got some of Leslie's genes, though. Watch her like a hawk. Now let's get going, shall we?" They started off again. June sulked in the back seat, but refused to say anything.

"I think we've finally tamed her, Max!" Fate said triumphantly.

"Never!" June shot back rebelliously. "You can chain me to this horrible car, but you can't chain my spirit!"

Max nodded. "She's right, Professor," he said. "Unless you invented something-"

"Shut up, you idiot," Fate said irritably. "She's getting on my nerves." The car sped up as he got angry.

"Uh, Professor," June said hesitantly, "You may want to take this turn a bit more slowl-"

"Shut! Up!" Fate roared. "I'll take the turn at whatever speed I choose!" The car whipped around the corner and nearly over-turned. Fate, however, sped up even more. Max and June glanced at each other nervously. It was only then that June noticed something that upset her: Max wasn't at all ugly. This, of course, made her feel terrible because abductors are supposed to be horribly ugly.

Fate took another turn too fast. There was a lake on either side of the road, which was currently on a bridge. The car went on two wheels, then flipped over the edge. Fate and Max were thrown clear, but June, as you will remember, was chained to the car. It sank rapidly, taking June with it. She'd screamed when they fell off the bridge, so she'd had no time to take a breath.

This is the end, June thought. Her lungs were burning and she needed oxygen badly. She fought the handcuffs that held her to the car, but they held firm. June felt herself getting light-headed and fought that, too, pulling harder on the cuffs. Random thoughts ran through her head.

I wish that Leslie and I had gotten along better.

I wish had been to California.

I wonder what Leslie's eating for lunch?

How long does it take to die?

Finally, just as her vision went hazy and she felt blackness clouding her oxygen-deprived brain, June saw a dark form swimming towards her. A final thought drifted lazily through her wind as she blacked out:

A shark?


I'm alive. The thought hit June as she slowly rose from the blackness of unconsciousness. Someone was breathing for her, she realized, but she didn't feel like taking a breath on her own.

Eventually, the thought that whoever was doing the breathing might decide to just let her die made June decide to inhale deeply. This made her choke on the water she'd swallowed, so she sat up and coughed it up. June opened her eyes to see Max sitting back on his heels. He was soaking wet, but looked vaguely relieved. June blushed slightly; he'd been keeping her alive, no doubt.

"You saved me." It was a statement, not a question.

"Yes," Max replied. "Yes, I did. We got the car out," he added, gesturing to where it stood on the shore of the lake. He offered no explanation of how they had managed it, and June didn't feel like asking.

"Good, she's awake," Fate said. "Let's get going before she runs again."

"Oh, I won't run, I promise." June had absolutely no intention of ever doing that again.

"Well, I'm glad you've gained some sense," Fate replied. "We're in Maine now. We're heading to Carpania."

"Again?" Max was skeptical. "Last time we went there we were arrested, remember?"

"Oh, we're just passing through. We won't get caught," Fate reassured him.

Max shrugged. "Okay, Professor," he said. They got into the nearly-dry car, which made June wonder exactly how long she'd been out, and they started off. Even though June had promised not to run off, Max still handcuffed her wrist to his, just in case.

A few weeks passed with no real action. June kept her promise not to run off, so Max removed the cuffs. The only notable event was when June had broken the news about her clothes.

"I need clothes," she had said.

"You've got a dress," Fate had replied.

June had looked at him as if he were stupid. "My nightdress is in tatters, and unless you want me to start wearing nothing at all, I need clothes."

Fate had not known how to reply to that, so he had agreed to get her some clothes and had gotten a skirt from somewhere. June wore that and one of Max's shirts and a vest and was fine. It was better than what Maggie had had to do, go around in her corset and underwear.

They'd entered Carpania a week later.

At first, they went undetected. They kept from the main roads and didn't go into any towns. Then Fate made the mistake of stopping at the same pond they'd stopped at before. One of the guards found them and brought them before Baron Von Stuppe.

"You again!" The Baron was obviously surprised.

"Again?" June asked, confused. "They've been here before?"

Von Stuppe noticed her for the first time. "Ah, what have we here?" he slipped a hand under June's chin and lifted her face, examining it. "Very pretty. They were here once before, about half a year ago. And who might you be?"

"June." June had no intention of giving out her last name. "I'm Leslie's half-sister."

"The Great Leslie?" Von Stuppe looked taken aback. "I was not aware that he had a sister."

"Half-sister," June repeated. "He didn't mention me often."

"I noticed," Von Stuppe said dryly. "Take the two men to a cell."

June's eyes flashed angrily. "You put me with them or I'll rip your eyeballs out!" Max winced at the thought, but the Baron had not travelled with June for a month, as Max had, and had no idea that she'd happily keep her word.

"Put her in a separate cell," the Baron ordered. June leapt for him, raking her fingernails down his face and screeching angrily. He staggered back, bleeding from ten long scratches. "On second thought, go ahead and put her with the others. It won't hurt any." he touched the deepest cut and winced.

Fate, Max and June were put into the same cell as before. The only real difference from their last visit was that the bar had been replaced in the window. The door was shut behind them as the guards pushed them in, then the lock clicked ominously.

"Well," June asked, "What now?"


A few hours later, June paced back and forth in agitation. Fate was angrily yelling at nothing at all, and Max sat on the floor against the wall, eyes closed. "Professor!" June finally shouted, "Would you please shut your trap? I can't concentrate with you screaming like that."

Fate, of course, was understandably upset by this. "Young lady, you are half my age. Do not order me around!"

June was fed up by this time. "I don't care. Shush or I'll knock you out with something." Max glanced up and smiled slightly, but his amusement went unnoticed by the two fighting. Fate shushed. June stopped by the window and glanced out of it. She saw a long, narrow, almost gun-shaped cloud and grinned. "I've got an idea. Now here's what we're going to do..."

After explaining her plan, she collapsed on the floor. Max ran to the door. "Open up, she's sick!" he said, pounding on the door. The guard opened it. "June's sick," Max repeated. The guard came in to where June was sprawled on the floor, then gestured for two other guards to make sure the men stayed in the room while he carried June outside.

Once the door was locked and they were heading down the passage, June opened her eyes and threw a punch worthy of the Great Leslie. The unfortunate guard on the receiving end, the one carrying her, crumpled to the floor with a bloody, broken nose. June jumped up from where she'd been dropped and crouched, balancing on the balls of her feet. One guard rushed her, but she side-stepped and stole his gun as he fell down the stairs. After pointing it at the third guard, who backed up and also fell down the stairs, June grabbed the keys from the first guard. "Sorry," she muttered to the three unconscious guards, "It was this or be a prisoner. You have my deepest sympathies."

June sprinted back down the hall and skidded to a halt in front of the door to their cell. After fumbling for the right key, she inserted it in the lock and opened it. "Hurry, hurry," she urged the two men. "They'll wake up and raise the alarm. We've got to get out of here before they do."

They went into the passageway. Max paused by the unconscious guard that June had slugged. "Where'd you learn to punch like that?" he asked.

June shrugged. "Leslie taught me that about four years ago. He never did explain why." She grinned. "It sure came in handy today, though."

Fate led the way to the car, and they all got in. Fate drove towards the newly repaired portcullis, and Max shot it down again with the cars handy cannon. June waved sweetly at the Baron, who had come into the courtyard and was looking very put out. He glared at her, so she just turned around.

"Good job, June," Fate said, cackling. "We're safe now!"

"Yeah, terrific," Max said. He smiled at June, who blushed and looked away.

"Thanks," she said softly.

While they drove out of Carpania, June sat in the back seat, thinking. As she went back over the years, she realized that Leslie really hadn't been all that unkind. Sure, he wasn't the affectionate older brother she'd always wanted, but he did take good care of her. She remembered him comforting her when there was an especially loud storm, when she was six and he was ten. And actually, there hadn't been that many dishes or that much housework. It was only the two of them and Hezekiah. She was the biggest culprit, clothes-wise. June sighed sadly. She'd been unfair to her half-brother, she really had.

"Why the long face?" June jumped as Max spoke.

"No reason," June quickly said. "Oh, look, we're out of Carpania," she added, to change the subject. Max, sensing that she didn't want to talk about it, let the topic slide. There was silence off and on for about two hours. In these moments of quiet, June quietly thought of ways to leave. She would never go through with them, since she'd promised she wouldn't, but it was still interesting to find ways of escaping.

"We'll stop here tonight," Fate said, making both Max and June jump. "I'm tired." He pulled over onto the side of the road and they made camp. June grabbed a blanket and curled up on the back seat of the car. She never slept with the two men if it could be at all helped. She thought it improper, which it was.


They travelled for another month or so, by which time they were in Russia. The nights grew cold, and June had to give up sleeping in the car. She had tried it, but the blanket just didn't keep her warm enough. The men were polite enough to sleep on the other side of the fire, though, so it wasn't totally improper. Still, June didn't enjoy the close proximity of them, even if they did keep their distance.

Then came the really cold nights, when they were in Siberia. June shivered in the back seat of the car underneath two blankets, which she had stolen from Fate and Max. They were in the front and didn't need them anyway, blankets would have only gotten in the way of the pedals. On the third night in Siberia, June was so cold that she shivered. She was practically in the fire, and had doubled her blanket up and had curled into a tiny ball, but it wasn't keeping her warm. Biting down her pride, she took the invitation that Fate and Max graciously offered and slept between them.

This was, of course, extremely uncomfortable for her, especially when she woke up back-to-back with Max. She scooted away at once, but had to admit that it was much warmer.

They were soon out of Siberia. For June, that day couldn't come fast enough. After a two week ride across the ocean on an iceberg, during which time she was bored to death, they landed in Alaska and were in Washington within the day. As the days grew warmer, June relaxed and went back to sleeping alone in the car. Then they reached the desert, and June was once again miserable. It was hot during the day, but cold at night. The third day of the first week in the desert, June fell asleep drenched in sweat.

The next morning, around six, June sat up as she heard a noise. An engine, probably on a car. As she squinted through the early-morning fog, she made out two headlights and a white car. It was Leslie. For a brief second, she debated whether or not to jump out of the car and run to him, but she decided that that wasn't a good idea. She climbed out of the car as Fate and Max looked up from their position sitting by the fire.

Leslie's car screeched to a halt, and Leslie leaped out. June looked at him enviously, wishing that she could leap from the car like that. But she couldn't, wearing a dress and all that. Long skirts hamper your movement, as we all know. "Fate!" Leslie said gallantly, "Unhand my half-sister!"

June sighed. "Leslie, I'm not tied up or anything."

Leslie, in a rare moment of brotherly affection, smiled at her. June could see the relief that she was unhurt in his eyes. Maggie got out of the car, impeccably dressed in a dark pink dress. "Shame on you, Professor," she reprimanded the unfortunate Fate. "Kidnapping an innocent girl like that. While she was asleep, even!"

Fate looked abashed for a brief second, then grinned savagely. "Oh, well. Now for my revenge. Max, kill the girl." June just about died of shock.

"I saved your sorry butt and that's the thanks I get!?"

Fate glared. "Shut up. Max, shoot her." he handed his henchman a small handgun. Max looked at it for a second, obviously in indecision.

"But, Professor," he finally said, "she's just a girl! Wouldn't it be better to shoot Les-"

"Shoot her, Max!" Fate was turning red, and June expected his ears to shoot out steam any minute.

"No," Max said, and tossed the gun behind him. June saw Leslie catch it out of the corner of her eye, but she paid no real attention to it. "For ten years I've done your dirty work, Professor. But I won't kill an innocent girl." June relaxed, immeasurably relieved that he wasn't going to kill her.

Fate sighed. "Very well. I'll shoot her myself." Max just shrugged. June stared at him, heartbroken. Didn't he care that she was going to die? Fate brought up his own gun and cocked it. June froze, unable to move. Her life flashed in front of her eyes, and she almost yelled out that she loved Leslie and was sorry that she had been so beastly to him. Steeling herself, she just waited instead. Just as Fate was going to pull the trigger, Max knocked him out with a metal bar. June, numb with surprise, got the vague idea that it was probably from one of the previous races.

Leslie, mis-understanding what was going on, pulled the trigger on the little handgun. The tiny firearm did what it did best, and Max gasped, then collapsed. June and Maggie both jumped, then glared at Leslie. "He was saving me!" June cried, angry. "Why did you shoot him?"

"I-" Leslie started, but Maggie rounded on him before he could finish.

June heard none of what Maggie said, which was good because some of it was pretty angry, just ran to the Hannibal Twin 8 and got the first-aid kit. Dropping to her knees beside her bleeding, unconscious savior, June fumbled with the catch on the kit. "Come on, come on," she muttered to it. Finally, she got it open. With trembling fingers, June grabbed a bandage and some metal clips to hold it in place. Hopefully he wasn't too badly injured.

After sticking three of the metal clips in her mouth, she held the bandage under her chin and felt around Max's shoulder for the bullet hole. Thankfully, Leslie hadn't aimed to kill. After finding it, she realized with happiness that the bullet had gone right through, so she wouldn't have to probe for it. Maggie joined June on the ground while Leslie sulked in the car, and together they managed wrap the bandage around Max's shoulder, Maggie holding his arm up and June doing the bandaging.

After that was done, Maggie went back to apologize to Leslie while June secured the bandage. She pulled the first clip from her mouth and tried to figure out how it worked. Max opened his eyes while she put on the second one, but June didn't notice. It was only as she was putting on the third clip that he shook his head, as if to clear it. "Ouch," he said in a woozy voice. "That hurts."

June sighed in relief. "Thank goodness you're awake. It should hurt, you got shot with a bullet."

Max closed his eyes. "So that's what it was. I wondered."

June closed the first-aid kit, unsure of what to do now that he was conscious. "Uh, thanks for saving me," she said finally. "I really didn't want to die."

Max snorted. "I didn't want you to die."

"Why not?" June asked, smiling. She helped Max sit up, then waited for his answer.

He thought for a second. "Well, you did get us out of Baron Von Stuppe's castle, but that's not the real reason." June wondered what the real reason was, but didn't think it polite to ask. If he wanted her to know, he'd tell her, she reasoned. Max sighed, absentmindedly rubbing his shoulder. It probably hurt a lot, June noted distractedly. "If you want to know, the real reason is because you inspired me to finally stop listening to Professor Fate. Really the only reason I helped him was because he took me in off the streets. My parents died when I was eleven, you know."

They both glanced over at where Leslie was tying Fate up. "Well, he'll go to jail for kidnapping me," June said finally. "What are you going to do now?"

Max shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe I'll go into the car-building industry. We hand-built the Hannibal twin 8."

June glanced at the black car. "Really? Is that why there is such a mix of parts?"

Max nodded. "Fate had me steal them. I still feel sort of guilty about that."

June smiled. "I bet." she tripped over a tree stump, and Max caught her arm. "Thanks," she said, blushing. "Sometimes I'm so clumsy. It's embarrassing. Well, we'd better get back to-"

Max cut her words off by kissing her. June, shocked into stock-stillness, had no clue how to react to that, so she just went with what her heart told her.

Leslie and Maggie glanced over at them in time to see the kiss. "I had wondered when she'd get married," Leslie said to Maggie. "I just hope he's good and reformed. I'm going to miss her, though."

Maggie patted his arm comfortingly. "I'm sure you will, but I bet they'll visit often."

Leslie smiled slightly. "I hope so. Life just won't be the same without my spunky little sister. But I guess that's how life goes."

A/N: It's short. Very short. A little over ten pages short. But I liked it all right. Max is very out of character, but I really couldn't have written this without pulling him out of character. I made up June, and the makers of The Great Race own everyone/everything else.

Again, NO FLAMES!!

(Edited Version 2.0)