FMA Quiz Show
Episode One: Example Of How This Show Works
PoX's Note: Well, I actually got help from both the Gem Alchemist and the I-Have-No-Idea-What Alchemist. And I actually don't know what Alchemist the other Alchemist is, and now I'm just confusing myself ^^. So, again, it's another humour story that is kind of similar to another story I wrote, except this is going to be even funnier, I guarantee. Thanks again to the two Alchemists and I hope you all fellow readers enjoy this story! Please R&R!
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"Hello and welcome to the FMA Quiz Show!" Mei Chang, the host for this show, announced loudly to the audience.
The audience cheered and applauded for what seemed like hours until they finally quieted down.
"So," Mei said, "this is the very first episode of the FMA Quiz Show, and this episode is going to tell you how this show works. So now, first of all, either the audience or the author of this story will ask one of the FMA characters a question based on either the first series or the second series, who cares. So, if the character gets it right, they get a free cookie – choc-chip – and get to leave this show… alive." She said the word "alive" as though she was trying to act all scary and stuff. "Anyways," she continued on cheerfully, "if they get it wrong, either the audience or the author – again – get to choose a punishment for that character. After that character gets punished, they can leave the show."
The audience applauded once more, excited for what was going to happen.
Mei took out her palm cards and read them quietly before announcing loudly to the waiting crowd: "So, this is an example of what I mean, if any of you still don't understand and would like to see what I mean." She shuffled the cards and the audience waited patiently as Mei finished shuffling and read the cards. The audience held their breath as she read aloud: "This question is from the author of this story to go to… Envy!"
The crowd cheered with excitement as Mei left the stage and dragged Envy over to the spotlight. "Wha…?" Envy looked around in confusion, and he kept closing his eyes continuously, as though the bright light was way too much for him. "What the hell am I doing here?"
"You're in the FMA Quiz Show," Mei replied impatiently as though she couldn't believe that Envy had no idea where he was. "And the author wants you to answer a quiz question for her."
Envy was still confused, despite Mei's explanation. So he asked, "FMA… Quiz Show? What's that?"
"Wow, you're slow in trying to understand what I mean," commented Mei. Her pet, Xiao Mei, who was on her shoulder the whole time, laughed at Envy's stupidity. "Anyways, this is the question. Can you remember how you died in the FMA Brotherhood Series?"
The crowd "ooed" and "aahed" as Envy looked very thoughtful, as though trying to figure out what the answer was. "Well, I shouldn't be here in the first place. But seeing that you all want me to answer this dumb question so badly, then I guess I'll answer it anyway. Umm… let's see, obviously I died before they met the gold-toothed doctor… Wait, wasn't it that Colonel Mustang guy who killed me? I guess I have to admit that I was getting pwned by that stupid human… So, am I right?"
"WRONG!" Mei shouted, and the audience laughed at his stupidity. Xiao Mei cracked up and fell down off her owner's shoulder. "You actually died because you killed yourself, idiot. Even I know that, even though I wasn't there to see it." She looked at her palm cards once more. "Okay, so the punishment for now…" The crowd held their breath once more as Mei shuffled her palm cards once more. Envy was totally embarrassed, as though he couldn't believe he got that simple question wrong.
"The punishment, one again, coming from the author of this story, reads: The audience gets to throw coconuts at Envy if he gets it – the question - wrong. And it must hit him at least three times."
"Why coconuts?" asked Envy, curious now.
"I haven't finished yet, dumb guy!" Mei snapped. Xiao Mei stared at the palm card as Mei Chang continued on: "Umm… it says: I chose coconuts because you know… Envy looks like a palm tree and all… hehe…"
"WHAAAT?" Envy was mad, never madder in his life. "Where's the author of this story? Or at least the one who said all that? I'm going to choke her to death! Or even STAB HER! PALM TREE! How dare anyone say that? I AM NOT A FRIGGIN' PALM TREE!"
"SHUT UP!" Mei shouted. "I still haven't finished!"
"THEN WHAT DOES IT SAY?" Envy demanded angrily as he braced himself for another insult, but instead what he heard was even more surprising than he expected it to be.
"It reads: No offense Envy! You're my favourite character!"
"Favourite character? As in… I'm her favourite character?" The Homunculus was totally dumbfounded and surprised.
"Yup!" Mei replied. "So now, audience, get your coconuts ready. Envy," she added to the Homunculus. "I'll give you three seconds to move around freely before the crowd throws their coconuts at you." She took out a whistle, and got ready so that she could blow it. "Okay… three, two, one… THROW!" She blew the whistle, and a loud "BEEEP" came out of it. The audience launched their coconuts at Envy, who was running madly everywhere. "Envy the Homunculus is running around like he's the best dodger ever!" Mei reported through the microphone. Xiao Mei danced around her shoulder, attempting to throw coconuts as well. "There's a coconut flying on his head… OUCH!" she cried as the coconut landed on Envy's forehead. "That must have hurt! Two more times to get hit…"
"This is such a dumb show!" Envy hissed. "I'm just going to keep getting owned by these stupid coconuts, and it's all that authors—GAAAHH!" He rubbed his stomach in pain as another coconut landed on him.
"WOW!" Mei cried. "Awesome throw! The last one to hit him will get a free cookie!" Xiao Mei grinned as Envy glared at Mei.
Envy spat: "Well, I'm leaving right now!" He suddenly disappeared out into thin air, and so nobody got to hit him for the third time… sadly. Mei shrugged, as though she didn't really care if the punishment was finished or not. But Xiao Mei thought differently and was looking disappointed, and so did the crowd. They all wanted to laugh while Envy was being humiliated. "I guess that's too bad," she sighed. "It was no skin off my nose. So, now that we're concluding the first episode of the FMA Quiz Show, I'd like to wish you all goodbye and hope that you all enjoyed this show and would watch it again and again! Oh, and, now you know how this show works too! We'll be waiting!"
The crowd cheered again and Mei concluded the show.
…
PoX's Note: How was it? Did it meet your expectations? I sure hope so. Well, that's the end of the very first Episode of the FMA Quiz Show, and I want to thank the Gem Alchemist and other Alchemist once more for helping out. If you want to ask an FMA Character a question, then go ask. Well, anyways, please review and… oh! This is actually very important:
I'LL BE UPDATING WEEKLY.
Well, that's about it. Well, please review and thanks for reading this story.