Karma's POV
"I love you." The words painfully slipped out of her mouth as the tears ran down her cheeks. I felt terrible.
"I love you too Amy- more than anyone else on this earth, just not like that." I could almost hear our hearts shatter, neither of us could recover from this. Would our friendship survive? We'd been best friends for longer than I could remember, we'd done everything together. Why did she have to go and complicate things?
It's been three days since Amy told me how she felt and we still hadn't spoken. I'd suspected it for a while but I honestly thought I'd been imagining it. She would get insanely jealous whenever I wanted to spend time with Liam. She started looking at me differently. Honestly I'm flattered but I just couldn't think of Amy like that, we'd been through too much. After all, I love Liam, right? My head's a mess but I have other things to worry about, today had to be perfect, today was my big audition.
My school is doing a production of the musical Wicked, it's always been my dream to play Glinda, the star of the show, I smiled at the thought, swallowed the last of my warm honey and lemon drink and set off for school. It was a hot day and the sun was shining so I thought I'd walk rather than get on a stuff bus for half an hour with rowdy people from my school. It had nothing to do with knowing that Amy would be on that bus.
I hadn't planned on avoiding Amy but as soon as I saw her walking down the hallway I had to go to the bathroom, when we had English I had a migraine so I had to go to the nurses office and at lunch time I was rehearsing in the choir room. Admittedly none of those things prevented me from speaking to her, I just didn't know what to say to her anymore, I didn't want to upset her any further.
"Karma!" My head instinctively turned round at the sound of my name, her eyes locked on to mine instantly. Amy. I smiled, it was good to see her. I'm glad she's doing okay. I felt more and more nervous at the thought of talking to her and I didn't know why.
I knew the smile on her face was lying; her eyes gave it away.
"Hi, you weren't in English this morning so I was worried." She was prentending everything was normal, I was grateful for this but it didn't change anything, I still didn't know how to speak to her or be around her anymore.
"Oh yeah, I had a headache so I went to the nurses office." I wasn't avoiding you, I should have said. But I didn't. What an idiot.
"Oh right." She said, she knew I wasn't telling the whole truth. "It's your audition later isn't it? Well good luck, I'll see you around I guess." Amy's head hung low as she started walking away from me. Her blonde ponytail swaying ferociously with every step she took. It was only then I realised.
Amy never had her hair up. She never wore sweatpants for school. She never walked away from me like that. Like I hated her.
"Amy wait." I called after her but it was too late I blew it.
I was a terrible person. I'd spent the entire weekend trying to force myself to feel that way about her but it just didn't work. I hated myself.
I couldn't worry about that now my audition was in half an hour, I needed to focus. If I got this part maybe I could throw myself into school again and that would give me and Amy some well needed time apart. Damn it I was thinking about her again. I shook my head and began walking to the drama room.
Amy's POV
"Amy wait." Karma was calling after me, I couldn't turn around. I didn't need her sympathy right now. I'd had enough of it from Shane and my mum this weekend. I rested my head against my locker. How did I end up in such a mess?
I love Karma. She's my best friend in the whole world. But she's also so beautiful, her face is the only face I want to see and her voice the only voice I long to hear. I don't know how this happened but I'd fallen in love with my best friend.
Fuck.
I slammed the front door as I got in. Mum was cooking something in the kitchen I could hear Lauren's music pumping out from her bedroom.
"What's wrong sweetie? Did you and Karma not make up?" My mum said, although she was trying to be nice and act caring it was so patronising. I just looked at her. I knew if I opened my mouth I would scream. I was so angry. I slumped off to my room.
I've never really been an angry person, I was far more happy-go-lucky but these last few days I was furious. I didn't know who I was more angry at, myself or Karma. Probably myself. I could hardly bare to look at myself without getting angry over what I'd done. Why did I have to tell her, I couldn't just keep my mouth shut and wait for it all to blow over could I?
"You're so stupid." I told myself in the mirror. "You really screwed this up, Karma could never-" I stopped myself. I had to stop beating myself up about this. I turned to leave the bathroom. Lauren was loitering in the doorway. How long had she been there? Judging by the smirk on her face long enough.
"I don't what happened with you and Karma but I'm enjoying the aftermath." She said with a smug look on her face. Lauren was my evil step-sister. She'd never really done anything bad to me but she always wound me up usually I could take it on the chin and act like it didn't bother me but she'd caught me on a bad day and I couldn't hold it back anymore.
"Go to hell Lauren." I pushed her against the doorframe, I hated her.
I lay on my bed wondering what Karma was doing. Her audition would be over now. She's probably on her way home. There was once a time she'd come back to my house after big auditions. I shook the thought from my head. I had to stop.
I don't know how long I'd been asleep. It was happening a lot lately, I'd drop off for hours at a time and wake up completely disorientated. I picked up my phone to check the time.
7.42
3 missed calls from Karma
I rang her back. It just rang and rang. Come on Karma answer your phone, I willed her to pick up. I was so looking forward to hearing her voice.
My mum came in my room hovering near the end of my bed awkwardly. Looking at me like I was a patient on a mental ward.
"Amy darling, we need to talk." Her voice was soft, not patronising like it usually was.
"Not now mum, I'm trying to ring Karma." I was annoyed. My mum always chose the worst times to have little talks with me about Lauren. I'd had this conversation time and time again and it was always the same conclusion.
Her hand reached up and covered mine. "Put the phone down honey it's important."
I lowered my hand and hung up the phone, Ifelt a lump form in my throat and my palms had started sweating profusely. I thought the worst. I always did.
"Amy, Karma's been taken into the hospital-" I didn't hear anything else my mum said because I was already half way out the door.