Little drabble that I first posted on my Tumblr. A friend (disgruntled-muppet / Hemillsie) asked for Pepperony. As always, link to the original is available on my profile. Enjoy!
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Kitchen vs Genius
He tried to make her breakfast one morning.
To be fair, he'd been awake for 36 hours working on a project, and the whim hit him in a half-delirious state at four in the morning, but Einstein be damned if that was gonna stop him. Besides, Pepper was always taking care of him, he felt he should return the favor.
He had not actually realized his Tower had a kitchen, but in retrospect it made sense, since the hamburgers and sandwiches that made up his diet had to come from somewhere. After downloading a gourmet pancakes-from-scratch recipe from the internet, and an advisory warning from Jarvis, Tony cracked his knuckles and went to work.
Pepper arrived two hours later and discovered the result.
Considering that Tony Stark had never watched someone cook before, much less tried it himself, the results were actually pretty impressive. That is, the first half of the pancakes were gooey, inconsistent blobs, and the second half were burned to various degrees of blackness. One pancake was stuck to the ceiling.
The actual recipe, Tony had no problem with; he was a chemist after all. But he was far too impatient a man to deal with the vague how-to cooking instructions and the instinctive "you'll know when it's done" approach. After many, many frustrating tries, Tony finally broke down, pulled up the internet, and had Jarvis read him step-by-step instructions from an article titled "Pancakes for Dummies." With the last of his pancake batter, he managed to make a perfectly cooked golden brown pancake, with Mickey mouse ears and all.
Which he then doused in high-end strawberry jam to impress Pepper, only to belatedly remember seconds later that she was deathly allergic.
They ended up having orange juice and cereal.
"It tastes… good," Pepper complimented after the first mouthful. Tony gave her a sidelong glare and pout, wondering if she was mocking him. "No, really. Perfect milk-to-cereal ratio."
"I'll get it right next time," he muttered, more to himself than to her.
She thought about the mess in the kitchen, carefully avoided cringing, and crossed her fingers in hopes that there wouldn't be a next time.
She gave him a quick peck on the cheek before turning back to her cereal. "Thanks for trying though," she said, and meant it - Tony would only ever attempt such a thing for her, and she found that sweet.
Tony just glared at the pancake, sitting on the plate still covered in strawberry jam. It seemed like such a shame. All his valiant effort, wasted.
"Hey Jarvis," he called. "Want the last pancake?"
"I would be honored, Sir," Jarvis said after a moment, "If you can promise me it's the last pancake you will ever make?" Apparently Tony's little stunt didn't go over well with Jarvis, either.
"Of course," Tony agreed, and Pepper almost breathed a sigh of relief.
Almost.
"Next time, I'll be making waffles."