Harry Potter and the Hall of Alumni

Disclaimer - I OWN NOTHING. Seriously I really don't own any of this. Even the OC's mostly belong to other people. So please don't sue me, I'm but a poor student.

A/N - This is a very retarded little plot idea and it really doesn't go anywhere. It was just the result of me and some friends trying to put all our RP characters into a Hogwarts setting. The results were very very silly indeed and this is just fraction of the random crack we thought up. I thought I might as well put Harry in it though and I've had a bit of an HD binge recently so Draco's in it as well.

On with the Story!! And if you want to review, that would be nice. XD

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Chapter One

Harry Potter was pissed off beyond all belief. He was serving detention again, but that was nothing new and was all water off a ducks back. When had put him in such an irate mood was that he was now serving detention with an equally irate Draco Malfoy, thanks to a particularly nasty public brawl by the lake which had somehow ended up with the giant squid being badly wounded and loosing a tentacle, and several hundred gallons of water being dumped on a group of nearby Hufflepuffs. The dark haired boy scowled, it was all Malfoy's fault, at least it probably was. And so it came to pass that the two sixth years were sent to a part of the castle that neither of them had ever seen before and found themselves outside a long and narrow room with "The Hall of Alumni" written in ominous letters above the doorway. Their punishment entailed, cleaning the Hall from top to bottom without the use of magic and arranging the many yearbooks and school photos into chronological order. It was a task that would take weeks to complete and Professor McGonagal had suggested it as an exercise in patience and controlling one's temper.

'Why the hell isn't Ron serving detention, I wonder.' Harry thought to himself. 'Of course, because he wasn't the one who got thrown head-first into the lake and got caught. Why do these things always happen to me? His thoughts were interrupted by the incredibly loud and annoying comments of his arch-rival.

"This had got to be the most pointless task ever created." Malfoy said irritably. "I mean no one ever goes here anymore, so what's the point in cleaning it."

Harry did his best to ignore him and focused instead on polishing the larger picture frames and receiving cheerful thank yous from the portraits they contained. Malfoy on the other side of the room had begun sorting through the rows of cabinets, and if complaining was an Olympic sport then he would have won the gold fifty times over by now. Once again the black haired boy did his best to tune the blond out. Maybe once he got his wand back he could start work on some kind of anti-bitching charm. Now THAT would come in handy.

Harry stopped dead in his tracks in between two paintings of Gargamel of Slytherin and Homnibus of Gryffindor, who were both important figures in the Smurf Wars of 1567. Between the portraits stood a bizarre┘well, Harry wasn't entirely sure what it was. I looked a lot like a pensieve and yet the liquid inside was every colour in the rainbow and a few more besides. In the centre was a tiny fountain that gurgled merrily as the young wizard approached. It looked like something from one of those ridiculous muggle gardening programs. Suddenly a tiny man jumped out of the water, which was definitely the last thing Harry was expecting and he proceeded to jump five feet into the air and scream in a much higher pitch than what was deemed masculine. The young wizard turned beet red with embarrassment, he'd screamed like a girl, in front of Malfoy of all people, this evening just couldn't get any worse. He waited for the onslaught of hurtful remarks but they never came. Instead the blond Slytherin had dashed over to see what the fuss was about and was now staring at the little man, no taller than six inches, in the fountain with equal shock.

"Merlin! What IS it? It's horrible!" Draco cried as the little man began a rather languid backstroke in the colourful waters of his home.

"Hello there, gentlemen." said the tiny creature happily as he slowed to a halt and began to tread water.

"Oh dear God! You're not a leprechaun, are you?" said Draco fearfully, leprechaun crack levels could be dangerous.

"Oh, nothing as exciting as that my lad." said the little man. "I am the keeper of the Fountain of Former Students! Although most people just call me Timothy."

"The Fountain of Former Students?" echoed Harry "What's that?"

"The Fountain of Former Students holds the echoes of all the students who ever attended Hogwarts. It is said that Rowena Ravenclaw herself created it. It will show you the lives of students past."

"So, are you saying this thing can take us back in time?" said Harry eagerly.

"Honestly Potter, was it Weasley's turn to use the brain cell the two of you share?" Malfoy sneered. The Griffindork was such a moron sometimes. But then again they were talking to a really tiny person in a magic fountain which was enough to strike anyone gormless.

"Well I don't we have to use sarcasm lad, your friend here was almost right. If you were to use the fountain you would see the past but would not be able to change things in any way. That's what time turners are for." said Timothy with a wry smile.

"Oh no, he is certainly not my friend..." Malfoy began to protest but was cut off abruptly by Harry.

"We can watch the past?" he cried, overjoyed at his own luck. "That means we can gather more information about Voldemort! I can see what my parents were like! This is amazing..."

"Yeah, you'd think so wouldn't you." Tim interrupted "But it's really not that simple. You see the fountain will only pick a certain year group at random and once it's been chosen you'll have to follow them until you have seen their entire stay at Hogwarts. Oh my, if you wanted to find someone specific, well, that could take years."

"It's still worth a try." cried Harry earnestly. After all anything was better than nothing.

"Oh no! There is no WAY that you're going to let this┘this creature takes us back in time to randomly watch a load of dead wizards go to school." said Malfoy angrily. "Or even worse, we are not going to watch you're sappy family grow up while you cry all over me. It's just not happening, it's sick and wrong."

"Ok Malfoy, if you wanted to mop the floors on your own then you could've just said so." said Harry with an unsually evil grin.

⌠So what decade do you think we'll go to first." said the blond, doing a complete one-eighty.

Timothy studied the rippling waters intensely, as if he were searching for a pattern or message of some kind. "Ooh this is interesting. Very interesting indeed. Well if you two are certain, then the fountain is happy to assist you." there was a great cloud of blue smoke which enveloped them and obscured the rest of the room and Harry felt like someone was trying to shove his face through a letter box.

"Do you have any idea where we're going?" Harry called out to Timothy who was now floating by Malfoy's left ear.

"Well the Fountain sensed a little animosity between you boys and wanted to rectify it." said the tiny guardian. "Oh Gryffindors and Slytherins have always been at each others throats but a few years ago two students managed to overcome their house prejudices and form a friendship stronger than any other."

"Well at least it's not Potter's precious parents." said Malfoy snidely, although a crying Potter would be an excellent opportunity for future humiliation.

"Oh will you shut up you stupid F-.." Harry whispered angrily but was cut off again.

"Welcome my friends...to the turbulent eighties!" cried Timothy as both he and the smoke disappeared with strange high pitched whistle that sounded a lot like the Grange Hill theme tune and revealed the busy crowds upon Platform nine and three quarters.

"Right, we're in the past." Said Malfoy sarcastically "Now what?"

Harry was distracted however as he peered at a copy of the Daily Prophet with the headline "Death Eater attack claims six more lives" and was dated September first 1987. September first 1987? That was nearly two months before his parents were killed. They were still alive, he could go to them! "Mum! Dad!" the dark haird boy shouted and pegged it towards the barrier only to smash face first into it and nearly knock himself out.

"Ha! That was brilliant!" shouted Malfoy, laughing hysterically "That was so hilarious, and the way you cried for your mummy, it was priceless. Do it again!"

Harry glared at the other boy and did his best to stop his nose from bleeding. Ok so this was obviously a Hogwarts only flashback, bloody typical.

"Well what are you waiting for Scar-head. Let's get on the bloody train and get this pointlessly retarded flashback over and done with." shouted Malfoy, and Harry reluctantly agreed that this was the best plan of action.

Once they had boarded the Hogwarts Express Harry made his way to the compartment his friends normally sat in, although the action was rather pointless as they weren't with him and whoever did sit with him would not be aware of his presence. Malfoy had long since ditched him, favourite to sit in another part of the train.

A small boy soon entered the compartment, and sat directly opposite him, his dark red hair long enough to reach his shoulders and his eyes were almond shaped and a deep brown and concealed by a pair of thick rimmed glasses. He must have been a first year gathering from the nervous look on his face and his relative age.

They sat in silence for a while, Harry couldn't start a conversation with the boy even if he had wanted to. Although maybe this was the person that Timothy had told them about. The Gryffindor who was friends with a Slytherin or vice versa. Either way, he could either watch the boy or go and find Malfoy and the first option sounded a lot less painful.

A few minutes passed and another boy of roughly the same age came in. Like Harry he had messy black hair and glasses but his eyes were a clear sky blue and his mannerisms seemed a lot more cheerful.

"Is it ok if I sit in here." said the new arrival "Only everywhere else is full."

The red haired boy looked up curiously and nodded. The dark haired boy grinned happily and sat next to him.

"My names Avyn, Avyn Wing." said the dark haired boy and held out his hand.

"Sho Miyagi." replied red head, his voice was quiet with the strange lilt of a foreign accent. Chinese maybe? Harry thought.

"Wow that's an awesome name!"

"Well so is Avyn Wing." said Sho with a slight hint of a smile.

"It's so crazy isn't it. I mean a week ago I didn't even know I was a wizard and now here we are." Avyn babbled excitedly.

"Yes, it's all very different here." said Sho, nodding in agreement.

"Are your parents muggles as well?" said the smaller boy hopefully.

"Well, my father went to Hogwarts, he was a British wizard. And my mother is a Majo, that's a kind of Japanese sorceress. I only came to England a week ago. The language isn't a problem, I learned English from my father when I was little, but everything's so strange, it'll take some getting used to."

The dark haired boy's eyes widened and he was about to begin chattering again about how interesting that was and how much he hoped they were put in the same house together when two more first years scrambled into the carriage. One was petite and skinny and Harry was having real trouble in working out whether it was a girl or a boy. Either an incredibly pretty boy or an average looking girl. The boy behind he/she/it however immediately drew a loud gasp from the young Gryffindor as he instantly recognised him as Charlie Weasley.

"Hey guys, do you mind if we come and sit with you, only it's getting a little chaotic in the other carriage." said Charlie.

"Chamarlie! Look he's got the same hair as you!" said the other first year hyperactively and pointing at Sho.

"Please excuse him, he's had a few too many chocolate frogs." said Charlie, blushing slightly at the new pet name "I'm Charlie by the way, and this is Kara."

"I'm Avyn Wing, and this is Sho Miyagi." said Avyn cheerily and Sho gave a small wave to the new arrivals.

"Miyagi? No Way! You mean Miyagi as in the Miyagi clan?!" cried Charlie eagerly. Sho looked a little taken aback and nodded nervously. "They're bloody famous they are. My uncle Bilius went to Japan once and he told me all about them. Is it true you have a family dragon?"

Sho blinked at the torrent of questions before replying. "Yes, you said you had an Uncle called Bilius. You don't mean Bilius Weasley by any chance?"

"Yeah, did you know him?"

"He was my father."

There was a long silence between the four of them, but Charlie was the first to break it.

"That... is so cool!" he all buy shouted and gathered Sho up in a bone-crushing hug, which looked rather awkward as the Japanese wizard was significantly shorter than he was. "Just think, me related to the Miyagi clan. Wait until I tell Bill, he's my older brother, you'll like him."

"Th-there's more of you!" said Sho, looking slightly shaken. He wasn't exactly use to the whole touching thing, it all seemed very improper.

"Yeah." said Charlie gleefully "There me and my older brother Bill, he's a second year. Then there's Percy, and the twins, Fred and George, they're not old enough to go to school yet and then there's baby Ron and another one on the way."

"That's a lot of brothers." said Sho looking slightly shocked. "Your house must be very crowded."

"Oh it is, but we get on just fine." said Charlie happily. "Welcome to the family, cousin."

"Sorry to interrupt the cute moment and all, Chamarlie, but could you explain what the Miyagi clan is?" said Kara, Avyn nodding his agreement. The dark haired first year was glad he wasn't the only one who was totally confused.

"The Miyagi Clan, are one of the seven most powerful Wizard families in Japan." Charlie explained. "They are skilled worriors and each member of the clan has a spiritual weapon that can protect them. The leader of the clan is also granted guardianship of one of the seven dragons and ownership of the Miyagi shrine."

"Ok, I only understood about fifty percent of that." said Avyn, looking a bit lost, Harry could sympathise with him entirely. Still he never knew that Ron had a cousin.

"I think it means that Sho here is made of pure concentrated win! And Chamarlie's his cousin!" said Kara, grinning from ear to ear.

The four children chatted happily amongst themselves. Avyn was voicing his nerves about not knowing anything about magic but Kara reassured him that they were all in the same boat really because he didn't know much either. Charlie seemed a little overexcited at the prospect of having a new member of the family who was his own age while Sho smiled and patiently answered his questions and asked a few of his own about the Weasly family. The camaraderie was interrupted a few hours later when yet another first year burst in followed by three Slytherin prefects and a rather intrigued looking Draco Malfoy.

"SHO-PRINCESS! It thought I'd missed you!" said the youngest of the bunch, although Harry noted with surprised that the boy, while only eleven years old was sporting a mustache and goaty. It just wasn't normal.

"Er...Hello Chai. You all right?" said Sho nervously as he was once again forced into a hug, but this one was nowhere near as welcome as Charlie's.

"Why did you run away from me back in Diagon Alley? We were getting along so well." he turned back to his companions "See I told you he was pretty."

"Why didn't you just announce that you were gay." said one of the prefects angrily. He had dark matted hair and reeked of cigarettes and firewhiskey.

"I'm not. I just think Sho's pretty and I'm going to marry him someday." said the bearded little boy.

The Slytherins just laughed cruelly and dragged Chai out of the carriage with them. Meanwhile Malfoy was observing the group of first years chatter amongst themselves, and saying how weird Chai was and how on earth had Sho met someone like that.

"Oh no, not more Weasleys." he groaned. "I guess it doesn't matter which time period you go to they'll always be armies of them. You'd think they'd get the hang of contraception charms by now."

"Shut up Malfoy." said Harry angrily. "Go back and watch your Death Eater children and leave me alone."

"Ew, no thank you. It's a sad day for Slytherin when Bernard Black manages to become a prefect." said the blond with a shudder.

"Bernard Black?" said Harry curiously. Was this some relation of Sirius's that he hadn't heard of.

"Yes, my mother's cousin. No one in her family speaks to him because he's a half-blood and born out of wedlock. Plus the man's a complete drunk. He owns a bookshop in Knockturn Alley." he paused "But why are you so interested?"

"No reason. Just trying to makes sense out of this thing, because right now I don't understand anything."

Before he could say anything else though, the Hogwarts Express had ground to a halt at its destination and students had already begun to file out of the train.