Hi guys!

So I had this idea for a crossover between Harry Potter and Doctor Who... So, it's set in the post-trio era after the war when everything's normal (or so it seems) etc.

Hope you guys enjoy it!

Meh out

P.S. The stink pellet history is all made up. It's all my creation J.K.R. didn't confirm any of it.

DISCLAIMER: I own nothing nothing except my O.C. Luanne Wandworks (and Marie, Grace, Peter, etc.)

Chapter 1: The Doctor

"Lulu! LULU! C'mon, we'll get late for Zonko's!" Marie yelled at the top of her voice.

"I'm coming! Hold on!" Luanne yelled back from across the pub. Struggling, she made her way through the crowded lobby of the Three Broomsticks to where her friend Marie Stroller stood waiting impatiently.

"I swear to god, Lu, the time you spend in the toilet… It's longer than the Weird Sisters' last album put together!" Marie said as she handed her friend her coat and muffler. "Now c'mon, you know how crowded Zonko's gets after ten! The last time we came fifteen minutes late, and they were out of stink pellets. We had to postpone Filch's farewell prank party just because of that. You remember how mad Grace was at me for that? She promised to give me a week of detention with Trelawney if I messed up again."

Luanne slipped on her dragon hide gloves (they kept the cold out too) and stuffed a cap onto her head. "I'm sorry, I met Wanda Jones and we started talking about how Peter Dinklish and his latest girlfriend had another fight. Anyways, I don't see why the entire prank party had to be delayed, I mean, it's just a couple of stink pellets."

"Just a couple of stink pellets?" Marie looked scandalized. "Just a couple of stink pellets? Luanne Wandworks, do you know the value of stink pellets to master pranksters like me and Prefect Grace? No prank party in the world, not a single one, and especially not one for Argus Filch is complete without stink pellets. Stink pellets are the basic foundation of wizarding pranks. Did you know that Arthur Ramsbottom created the first stink pellet in 1547 to take revenge on his colleagues who made fun of his name? Did you? The net production of stink pellets per year is over 38,000 in Britain alone. They are one of the most simplest and brilliant creations ever made in the wizarding world. So, no, they are not just a couple of stink pellets, you moron!" she finished huffily.

"Alright, alright! Let's just go already." Luanne said opening the door. A blast of icy cold air from outside made them shiver. Retreating deeper into their thick woolens, the pair made its way up to the end of the street where Zonko's Joke Shop stood.

Hogsmeade was covered with a layer of fluffy white snowflakes. Icicles hung from windows and holiday wreaths decorated every door they passed. The road was covered with a thick sheet of soft snow. The village looked like a collection beautiful frosted gingerbread houses.

"Hurry up! Don't you see that crowd heading for Zonko's? Look! It's those idiots who usually hang out at Madam Puddifoot's Tea Shop! We need to get there before them! I heard that Peter Dinklish hid a seven stink stink pellets under Zyphy Smith's bed because he heard the ol' Zephy was trying to make a move on his ugly excuse for a girlfriend and I bet he's looking for more to hide in Gerard's cupboard too."

And sure enough, a crowd of dreamy looking teenagers from Hogwarts was approaching Zonko's Joke Shop as well, led by the devilishly handsome, bachelor ultimate and notorious heartthrob of Hogwarts, Peter Dinklish and his newest girlfriend, Zerelda Smith, who was busy sucking face with Peter (Marie gave them three weeks at best, which was longer than the length of most of Peter's other affairs). She made a face, and sped up, dragging Lulu by the arm.

"Ow! OW! Stop, Marie, you're going to rip my arm off!" Luanne yelped. She pulled her arm away and started massaging it. Marie rolled her eyes. "Well, what d'you expect me to do? You're walking slower than a snail. By the time we reach, they'll be out of stink pellets and probably dung bombs too!"

Luanne was becoming annoyed. "You go on ahead, I'll catch up with you later." she said flexing her wrist.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, of course. Go on."

"Alrighty then!" Marie said and sprinted off towards the shop, determined to outstrip the romanticizing teenagers.

She probably sprained it, Luanne thought, clutching her wrist in pain. She started following Marie's footsteps slowly. Grumbling and moaning, she walked on with grudging and hesitant steps, not really paying attention to the snow trodden path. There was a dull ache in her temples. I don't even know why Marie likes pranking people so much, she thought. It seems stupid, wasting time and energy on seeing discomfort being brought upon someone else... It was common knowledge the Marie and her sister Grace were self proclaimed sadists. They were evenly matched against Filch, the ancient caretaker who was hell bent on destroying the entire student body, whom he referred to as 'a bunch of snot nosed good for nothing brats'.

After years of service to Hogwarts, Filch was finally deciding to retire. Marie and Grace were determined to win the long lasting battle between him and the students and had decided to throw Filch a surprise Prank Party to end the war with a bang. Marie had tried to persuade Luanne to help them but it was all in vain because Luanne refused to endanger her reputation as a rule follower.

Suddenly she stopped, realizing that she had clearly wandered off the main street of Hogsmeade. She could see no familiar landmarks. She seemed to be standing in a clearing surrounded by several thickets and trees. Not sure if she was lost or just panicking, she whipped out her wand and whispered, "Point Me.". Her wand swirled around and stopped, pointing in one direction. Relief washed over her but was almost instantly replaced by an unfamiliar chill as suddenly it swerved to point in the opposite direction. Then again it spun around and showed a different path. Panic filled Lulu's heart as she watched her wand spin around in different directions until she could stand no more and stowed it back safely in the back pocket of her jeans. It was useless, the wand couldn't determine north because the magnetic rocks were interfering with the earth's electromagnetic field. She tried standing on her tiptoes to look over the trees and try to determine the position of the sun, but it was a dark day and the grey snow clouds blocked out all natural light. She sat down on the ground, defeated.

"Hello there!" suddenly came a voice from behind her.

She let out a small scream and jumped a foot in the air. Shaking, she turned around and saw a man standing there. He was about a head and a half taller than her and had brown hair that stuck up in different directions. His eyes were fixed on her and his hands were in the pockets of his dark suit. There was a large blue phone box standing behind him. Lulu instantly got a feeling that this man wasn't your average wizard.

"Muggles aren't supposed to be in the parts," she mumbled slowly barely loud enough for him to hear her.

"What's that you called me? A muggle?" he said in a sharp voice. He didn't look like anyone she'd seen around the village or up at the castle ever before.

'Who are you?" she questioned louder this time.

"I'm the Doctor!"