It was so early that the first rays of sunlight hadn't yet had a chance to slip through the cracks of Matsuda's blinds. The man's dreams still lingered in his thoughts, having just woken up. Despite the hour, Matsuda did not want to go back to sleep. For some inexplicable reason, he longed to feel the cool concrete beneath his feet and breathe in the scent of fresh air after last night's storm.

He walked the halls of the headquarters in the dark, passing by the solitary confinement cells on his way to the stairs as swiftly as possible. He didn't like to be reminded that Light, Misa, and the chief couldn't get any fresh air, as he was, because they were ordinary people who had gotten themselves tangled up in a mess that was between only L and Kira—two people who were beyond the ordinary, two people who looked back at the world and all of its people and were still as far away from it all as they could get.

Matsuda sometimes thought that L didn't belong in this world, that he was an isolated entity in his own right.

Matsuda didn't like dwelling on it much.

As he opened the door to the roof, he was greeted just a heartbeat away from a figure standing against the railing, looking out at the city below, under the gradually lightening sky. As Matsuda drew closer, he saw that the figure was none other than L. When the man turned around, Matsuda could see that his dark eyes danced with the pursuit of secrets.

"Matsuda-san."

"Uh, hi, Ryuzaki." Matsuda came up, standing beside him, hands on the railing. "What are you doing up here so early?"

"Light-kun is asleep," the man answered, as though it explained everything. "I felt like a break. Watari is watching the cameras currently, so I came to see the sunrise."

"Ah, I see. Uhm, that's kind of the reason I'm here, too. I woke up."

"Apparently so."

Matsuda scratched the back of his head and stared back out at the city. He was fascinated by this man standing next to him. He was like a melody in flesh and blood—soft, delicate, and, in his own way, beautiful.

"Uhm...do you often look at the sunrise?" Matsuda asked, attempting to start a conversation.

"Not particularly," L replied.

"Oh."

Just as Matsuda was thinking with disappointment about his failed attempt at making small talk, L said, very quietly, "The more pollution there is, the more vibrant the sunrise. Isn't it ironic? I cannot help but like the thought of something so beautiful coming from something so ugly." He looked down at his toes, and then added, in a mutter, "Not that I am one for sentimentality."

Matsuda blinked. He would have never expected such a thing to come from L. L was all about cold hard facts and deductions, not...things like this.

"Yes I...do think that's ironic. And...uh...Ryuzaki can be as sentimental as he wishes."

L eyed him and nibbled on his thumb nail. "Interesting."

"I-interesting?" Matsuda stammered, confused.

"Matsuda-san's honesty is interesting. It is...refreshing."

Matsuda once again didn't understand what on earth L was talking about. "My...honesty?"

"Matsuda-san always says exactly what he is thinking. Everyone always can know exactly how he feels about things from his actions."

Matsuda liked it when L explained things to him, even if he still didn't understand. He felt special when he had L's full attention. This time, though, he only sort of understood.

"You and Light always seem like you can understand each other, too, without even saying things like I do. Do you...still think that he's Kira?"

"Yes." L's answer was resolute.

Matsuda bit his lip. "But, isn't Light-kun your friend?"

L's eyes turned hard. "I...am unfamiliar with friendship, but, yes, Light-kun is a friend."

What kind of a friend would suspect the other of mass murder? Matsuda didn't understand. If they were real friends, surely they would not always be down each others throats, right?

Maybe any type of friendly relationship with L would be like finding love in a wall—it couldn't happen.

Maybe, just maybe, Matsuda was smarter even than L when it came to knowing how to treat people. Maybe Matsuda could teach him.

By now, the sun was grazing the traveling clouds over the city, painting the world in vibrant colours, like stained glass built in the sky. Down below, the idle passerby trod upon the wet pavement, bustling about their busy lives.

"Ryuzaki," Matsuda said, "I don't...I don't think you know what it's like to be close to someone."

L raised his eyes toward the sky. "Matsuda-san is probably correct."

Matsuda's face turned red as he considered what he was about to say. Once he built up enough courage, he said, "If—if you want, I could...show you. Show you...how to be close to someone."

"How does Matsuda-san suppose he can do that?"

"Have you...ever been in a relationship, at least?"

"I can't say that I have."

"N-never?" Matsuda was surprised, though he supposed he shouldn't have been. L had, after all, said that Light was his first friend ever.

That made Matsuda feel inexplicably sad, though he couldn't pinpoint the exact reason as to why. Sure, he admired L, but he didn't feel particularly close to him.

Close to him. Oh. How ironic.

"W-well, when you're close to someone, it's usually okay to, uh, touch them, like...this..." Matsuda hesitantly lifted L's hand from off the railing and cradled it in his own.

L stared blankly at the hand Matsuda was holding. "I...see..." He then pulled his hand away.

"R-Ryuzaki! You can't be doing that!" Matsuda cried.

L blinked. "Was that not a handshake?"

Matsuda wanted to slap himself on the forehead, but he didn't.

"No, I was holding your hand. That's how you might treat a girl, or something. You didn't know that?" Surely L wasn't that clueless.

"I am aware of the custom," L said, "but I'm afraid I do not see the purpose of it."

"Well...I suppose people do it because it feels good."

L bit his finger. "It seems that feeling has eluded me."

"Then...err...there are other things that people do to feel good around each other." Matsuda really was trying hard to make L understand.

"You could...rub their shoulders," Matsuda suggested, but he didn't try it. He didn't really want to get rejected again.

"It is my understanding that emotions play a part in friendship and relationships. Matsuda-san is only focusing on the physical aspects."

Matsuda turned red. "Th-that is true, but, the physical can make people feel, too. Sometimes, the physical can make people feel happy, or fuzzy. Sometimes, it can make people feel good. And close." Suddenly, an idea popped into his head. "Uhm...would you...let me try something, Ryuzaki?"

L turned his head to the side. "If you feel you must."

"Okay."

Matsuda took a nervous step toward L, and then brought his head in very close, planting his lips on the other man's neck and kissing him, gently.

When he pulled away, L's face almost looked pink. Was he...blushing?

"Oh," L said, eyes wide. "Oh." He scratched the back of his neck, awkwardly. "I...might understand what Matsuda-san means, now."

"You—"

But, before Matsuda could finish his sentence, or even start it, L was already walking away.

"Thank you, Matsuda-san, for teaching me," he said, "but, I must now return to work."

Without another word, he closed the door behind him.

Matsuda could only stand there, feeling like, just maybe, he had been successful.


This is just something I wrote to entertain myself on a very slow afternoon. I'm not so sure about its quality, though. I don't really feel like it's very in-character, but, it's fluff, so, whatever.

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed. Thank you very much for reading, and please drop a review!

~Ratt Kazamata, 8/05/2012