Somewhere in the South Pacific
March 8, 1968
Jonas Grumby aka "The Skipper" was enjoying a relaxing afternoon fishing. On the island, fishing was more than a pastime-- it was sustainence. But Grumby didn't let that fact bother him. Fishing was something he enjoyed since he was a child, and something he intended on doing for the rest of his life.
Mary Ann hated disturbing the peaceful scene of the Skipper doing what he loved, but she knew she must.
Mary Ann interrupted the Skipper with, "Are they biting?"
The Skipper responded with a smile, holding up a good sized line of sea bass, saying, "We'll be eating good tonight."
"Great!" replied Mary Ann, "Could you please bring the fish and help me start the fire?"
The Skipper thought it was a little early, but jovially said, "Of course, Mary Ann."
When the two got close to camp, Mary Ann did something unusual and uncharacteristic. The petite farm girl let out a loud whistle.
When the two entered the clearing, the other five castaways shouted, "Surprise! Happy 50th Birthday, Skipper!"
The Skipper started to blush. When Ginger sang a Marilyn Monroeish "Happy Birthday, Captain Grumby," the Skipper turned beet red.
Mary Ann produced a date cake with a big "50" on it.
Gilligan said, "Gee Skipper, if we had enough candles, we wouldn't need a rescue fire... they could see your cake from space." Gilligan was rewarded by a good-natured smack on the head by the Skipper's cap.
Mr. Howell said, "Welcome to the half-century club, old man."
The Skipper replied, "Thanks, Mr. Howell, but I don't know if I like the term old man right now."
The Professor jibed, "You're only as old as you feel, besides you've lived a life of adventure."
The Skipper laughed, "Yeah, that's why I joined the Navy."
Gilligan interrupted with, "I joined the Navy to see the world, but all I saw was the sea."
The Skipper started to reminisce, "I joined to get off the farm, and to help my family... it was the Great Depression after all..."
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Somewhere in the Midwest
June, 1935
Seventeen-year-old Jonas Grumby looked at the posters in the window of the Navy recruiting office. If I could join the Navy, Jonas thought, I could help out my Ma, and see some of the world to boot.
As if reading his mind, the Petty Officer in charge of the recruiting office asked Jonas, "Can I help you, young man?"
At first Jonas was awestruck. The sailor struck quite a figure in his crackerjack whites, and had such a worldly look for someone who couldn't be more than ten years older than Jonas. Jonas finally blurted out, "I'd like to join the Navy."
The Petty Officer told tales of wild adventures and gorgeous women. It didn't take long for Jonas to be sold. But, since Jonas was only 17, the hard sell would be his Ma. The Petty Officer agreed to go out to the farm to talk with Jonas' mother. The Petty Officer told Mrs. Grumby quite a different tale of leadership, responsibility, and skill training. Jonas thought, this guy is one slick talker.
Reluctantly, Mrs. Grumby signed her oldest son over to the Navy. She didn't want to see him go, but she realized that eventually he would be old enough to go without her permission. She also realized the reality of the situation, Jonas' military pay could help save the homestead.
When Jonas reported to recruit training at Great Lakes Naval Station near Chicago, he quickly realized the recruiter sold him a bill of goods. The Petty Officer that was in charge of his recruit company didn't anything about Jonas' football skills, Ma, or farm. Jonas spent long hours marching, and scrubbing decks. He saw a break though when the drill instructor told the company about tryouts for the recruit band.
Jonas' mother insisted that he take music lessons since he was small. When Jonas wasn't playing football, he played the tuba. At the time, Jonas didn't appreciate the music lessons. Now that he saw them as a way to get out of swab duty, Jonas thanked his mother. Grumby played his heart out, and secured a place on the recruit band.
Jonas still spent hours marching, and playing the tuba. The music did make the weeks at Great Lakes go by faster, though. Before Grumby knew it, graduation day was at hand. Jonas proudly played "Anchors Away" with all of his heart.
"Grumby," barked his drill instructor.
"Yes, sir," replied Grumby.
"Call me Chief, not sir, seaman, you're no longer a recruit, and I work for a living. This is Chief Johanson with the Navy Band. He would like to know if you would be interested in auditioning."
Jonas was speechless. "Of course, sir" he replied. Both chiefs chuckled at the breech of military etiquette.
Grumby passed his audition and was given the designation of "Navy Musician." Over the years he demonstrated leadership skills. He was known as being tough, but fair, and a mean poker player. Towards the end of his four year enlistment, he was already a Petty Officer Second Class and a band section leader. He had also went to night school, and finished his high school diploma by studying at nights. Jonas Grumby knew that he would make the Navy his career.
One night in the summer of 1938, a poker game changed Jonas' life. A young congressman's aide had come aboard Jonas' battleship to go on a short "tiger" cruise and hear the band play. Later that night, the aide found himself in a game of cards with Petty Officer Grumby and three other musicians. The other musicians had folded, and it was down to Jonas and the aspiring politico.
With enough in the pot to literally buy the farm, Jonas said, "Call."
The aide boasted, "Dead man's hand, aces and eight's."
Jonas moaned, "All I've got is two pair."
As the aide reached for the pot, Jonas stopped him with, "a pair of red twos, and a pair of black twos."
The aide hemmed and hawed with, "I'm a little short, but I'll make it up... I promise." It took all three sailors to keep Jonas from throwing the congressional aide overboard.
Several weeks later Jonas was summoned to the Captains office. The Captain looked sternly at Jonas and said, "Petty Officer Grumby, I have a letter from a member of congress here, and I think you have some explaining to do."
Grumby paled and said, "Sir, that aide was a real piece of..."
The Captain cut him off, "You are hereby ordered to take the entrance exam for the United States Naval Academy, Annapolis. There's also a note attached from the piece of whatever aide saying 'the rest is up to you, Grumby.' Petty Officer, I don't know what type of influence you have, but I wish you the best of luck. If you do somehow get into the academy, appreciate every day, and thank that aide and congressman who gave you this opportunity."
Jonas was stunned. The aide wasn't a welcher after all. All he could say to the Captain was, "Yes sir, thank you sir."
Grumby relayed the story to his bunkmate. Jonas also felt a little guilty about the way he got a seat to take the test.
Jonas' buddy said, "Grumby, most those guys that get into the academy are a bunch of political appointees who don't know the bow from the aft of a ship. The system stinks, but you have a way in... take it, and don't look back."
Petty Officer Grumby didn't look back. He passed the test with flying colors, and entered the Naval Academy class of 1944 in the fall of 1940. He was older than most of the midshipmen, but his football skills kept him from being an outsider. Jonas enjoyed his academy years. The course of study got a lot more intense during his Sophomore year, when Japan attacked Pearl Harbor. Through an act of Congress, the four-year program at the Academy quickly became a three-year program. Jonas Grumby graduated from the U.S. Naval Academy in June of 1943, receiving a commission as an Ensign.
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August, 1943
Somewhere in the South Pacific
Ensign Jonas Grumby climbed the stairs up to the duty hut centered on the small island. He was a little nervous, reporting to his first duty station as an officer. Before, he was an enlisted man, a musician at that, in the peacetime Navy. Now he was at war, and going to be responsible for men's lives. On top of it all, he didn't get his first request for duty. He wanted destroyers. He got the mosquito Navy.
Grumby entered the Quonset hut, and informed the duty yeoman, "Ensign Grumby reporting for duty."
The yeoman didn't look up from his paperwork and automatically said, "Please wait for the Captain, sir."
Grumby waited several minutes, until a lieutenant came out of an office marked private, "Ensign Grumby? I'm Lieutenant Carpenter, Chief of Staff. Welcome aboard." The two officers shook hands, Carpenter continued, "Please accompany me to Captain Binghamton."
Carpenter and Grumby entered a small office where a bespectacled man sporting Captain's rank was behind a rather large desk reviewing what appeared to be a personnel file. Grumby came to attention in front of the desk.
"At ease, Ensign," Binghamton ordered. After Jonas assumed the 'at ease' position, the Captain continued, "Five years enlisted, naval academy... impressive credentials."
"Thank you, sir," Ensign Grumby replied.
Binghamton added, "Keep in mind, you're not enlisted anymore, Ensign, you are an officer... a leader of men."
Jonas answered, "They made that quite clear at the academy, sir."
Captain Binghamton sized up the new ensign. The last remark could be being somewhat smart aleck, but it was very subtle. "Ensign, I have a special assignment for you. One of our PT boats needs a bit more Navy discipline. I'm assigning you as executive officer of PT 73."
Carpenter looked up at that, and appeared like he was going to say something.
Binghamton ended the interview with, "Lieutenant, show the Ensign to his boat."
While walking out to the docks with Carpenter, Jonas asked, "You looked like you wanted to say something back there, sir."
Carpenter answered, "Grumby, you've had five years with the fleet and three at Canoe U. You know some things are better off finding out for yourself."
Jonas looked puzzled, uttering, "Yes, sir."
When they got to the boat, Grumby got an idea about what Carpenter and Binghamton was talking about. It definitely didn't look Navy, and the sailors on deck were in various stages of uniform. There wasn't any reaction to the two officers on the dock.
"Get McHale." Was all Carpenter said to one of the seamen. There was no salute or acknowledgment of the order, but within minutes a Lieutenant Commander appeared. His uniform was definitely a lot more casual than anything Grumby saw at the academy, or for that matter in the fleet.
Carpenter made introductions, "Lt. Commander McHale, skipper of PT 73, meet your new XO, Ensign Grumby."
McHale wiped the grease off his hands, and shook Jonas' had with a smile saying, "Off duty, I'm Quinton, I notice an academy ring and a good conduct medal."
Grumby replied, "Jonas. I just graduated from the academy, before that I was an MU2."
McHale smiled, "A musician huh. We could use some entertainment around here. Well I have an engine that needs looking after. Get to know the men."
Grumby said, "Yes sir,"as McHale went below.
As soon as McHale left, Grumby thought he heard one of the men say, "I smell a rat."
A chief petty officer walked up to Jonas and said, "Welcome aboard sir. Never mind Happy, he's just in a bad mood. I'm Chief Johnson, I just was transferred on."
"Thanks Chief, this boat seems a little laid back to me." Grumby replied.
The Chief laughed, "I imagine so compared to the band and the academy." Seeing Jonas' surprised look he added, "come on Ensign, you know scuttlebutt travels fast."
Jonas said, "I guess so," and let the new Chief give him a tour of the boat.
Later on that night Jonas heard a card game, but wasn't surprised the men didn't invite him. He was, after all an officer. Dinner was one of the best he's had in the Navy, but for some reason they wouldn't let him meet the cook. This was one strange boat he signed on. Against his better instincts, Jonas decided to listen in on the men.
Johnson was saying, "I tell you he's Binghamton's spy. Look at him... regular Navy, trying to act like a regular Joe. I heard about this guy, he's a real brown nose."
Jonas was hurt, Chief Johnson was acting like his friend earlier that day. Then Jonas took a peak... There was actually a Japanese POW serving the men during their game!
Happy replied, "Are you sure, Chief, he seemed a little stiff... but what Annapolis grad doesn't."
Johnson said, "And who gets into Annapolis? People with connections. I'll bet Binghamton's one of his connections."
"As long as you're sure, Chief." Tinker said.
Grumby felt a hand on his shoulder. "Heard enough, Jonas?" Jonas turned around to see his McHale.
All Jonas could think to say was, "Good evening, sir."
McHale said, "You have to earn the trust of these men, and this is not how to do it. Get back to your rack."
"Yes, Sir," Ensign Grumby replied.
The next morning there was a lot of activity on the boat. Grumby heard Tinker ask, "Skipper, are you sure we should still do this?"
McHale replied, "There's only one way we can make sure he's OK." McHale then looked up and saw Grumby and added, "Jonas, we're shoving off in 15 minutes."
Christy muttered something that sounded like, "Jonas, it should be Judas."
Johnson barked, "Christopher, that's no way to talk to an officer."
Grumby said, "Thank you Chief, but I'll handle it myself."
McHale then yelled, "Molly, you ready?"
A Navy Nurse replied, "Keep your shirt on McHale." Then to Grumby's surprise, several nurses boarded the boat.
The 73 then went to a deserted island. McHale ordered, "OK, we need to set up a watch schedule."
Grumby hoped to redeem himself, volunteering, "I'll stay on the boat and stand watch."
The men looked surprised. "Are you sure, Jonas?" McHale asked.
Ensign Grumby said, "You guys have fun."
"All right, thanks!" Said McHale.
McHale and crew had a picnic on the beach. On the way back they spotted a Japanese freighter without escort and sank her. Grumby was starting to like these guys, played hard and fought hard. If only he could get them to trust him.
Things were starting to loosen up on the cruise back, after the guys had their fun, and sank some tonnage. That is until they got back to the dock. Carpenter, Binghamton, and a young Marine guard were waiting for them.
McHale blurted out, "Jonas, what have you done?"
Grumby replied, "Sir, it wasn't me."
Johnson said, "Ensign, I thought we could trust you."
Jonas hear a chorus of, "Thanks a lot, Judas," from the crew.
Binghamton smiled, "McHale, I have you now. Bring your pirates to the recreation room. Mr. Grumby, take the nurses back to the hospital."
Chief Johnson cried, "That seals it. We get busted, and Ensign Judas gets the girls!"
Binghamton barked, "Chief you are talking about an officer in the United States Navy!"
The men just grumbled. Jonas just got icy stares from the nurses, and nobody talked on all the way to the hospital. Grumby then joined the PT 73 crew in the recreation room, but kept his distance.
Binghamton came in, and said with a little too much glee, "Shows over McHale. But, I'm in a sporting mood. You fancy yourselves as card players. Well I'll put up a little wager me, Carpenter, and the private play you and two of your pirates a little game of poker. If you win, everything is forgotten. If I win, you ask your buddy Admiral Rogers for a transfer to the Aleutians."
McHale replied, "It doesn't look like I have much of a choice."
Jonas chipped in, "I'm a bit of a card player."
Tinker replied, "Better put in a requisition for some parkas."
McHale ignored Tinkers remark and said, "Ensign, you'd better keep an eye on the boat."
Grumby replied, "Yes, Commander."
Johnson said to McHale, "Skipper, I've parted many an officer from their paychecks."
McHale then said, "OK, Johnson and Happy are playing. The rest of you back to the boat with Mr. Grumby."
Several men started to groan.
For the first time in his Naval career, Jonas Grumby disobeyed a direct order. He snuck away from the boat to see how McHale was doing. The game was not going well for the PT 73 crew. The Marine private was on fire, and Binghamton and Carpenter weren't doing too bad either. Then Jonas saw why.
Jonas entered the rec. room.
"Ensign, I gave you an order!" McHale barked.
Jonas ignored him and said, "Sir I need to talk to you!"
McHale sensed something was up, so came over to Grumby. Grumby quietly said something to McHale. McHale then went to the table and turned over the hand that Johnson tossed in. It was a full house. Johnson was throwing the game.
"Why, Chief?" McHale asked.
"Because you make a mockery of Uncle Wally's command!" The Chief replied.
"Uncle Wally, huh," McHale said, looking at Binghamton, "So you set poor Jonas up as the rat, to through suspicion off Johnson here. Well, a deal is a deal. The game will continue, except Jonas is taking Johnson's place."
Binghamton scoffed, "It won't matter, this is Private Philip Roth USMC of Las Vegas, Nevada-- the best poker player in the 7th fleet. And yes, a deal is a deal, and the game is still on."
Roth spoke up, "With all due respect Captain, I don't play rigged games. The only way I'll continue is if we start fresh." Binghamton agreed.
It wasn't long before all the players except Ensign Grumby representing PT73, and Roth, representing the CO, were left. The game went well into dawn, and all the chips were in the pot for the last hand.
"Call," Said Grumby.
"Straight, ten high," declared Roth.
Jonas smiled and replied, "Straight, queen high."
Roth stood up, shook Grumby's hand, and said, "Well played, Mr. Grumby. If you are ever in Vegas, be sure to look up Philip Roth."
The men from PT 73, looking in the windows, cheered. Binghamton just groaned. Jonas headed to the head, took a shower, and put on a fresh set of whites. When he came out, the crew of PT 73 was lined up on both sides of the sidewalk wearing crackerjack whites.. A boson's pipe shrilled.
McHale called "Attention on Deck! Preesent Arms!"
At that point the entire crew snapped to attention with the precision of the Annapolis drill team and executed a smart salute. When Jonas returned the salute walked down the walk each man said, "Thank you, Mr. Grumby." When Grumby made it back to the boat, Fuji had a cake ready that said "Jonas Grumby, the Best Poker Player in the 7th Fleet."
Binghamton did have some connections, and mysteriously within days Jonas got orders to report to a destroyer, his first choice of assignment. McHale offered to intervene, but Jonas explained to his skipper that he always was a 'tin can' sailor at heart. Jonas then said his good byes to the crew and packed his sea-bag.
While at the transient personnel office Jonas ran into another ensign coming in while he was going out.
"Jonas Grumby," Jonas said while extending his hand.
"Chuck Parker," the other ensign replied.
"I'm off to a tin can," Jonas offered, "you?" he queried.
"Mosquito Boat, PT 73," Parker answered.
Jonas laughed, "They're a good crew, once you get used to them."
Parker just looked puzzled.
Like many destroyer officers during World War II, Grumby was rapidly promoted. When Jonas came home after V-J Day, he was wearing the uniform of a Lieutenant Commander. Grumby also saw action in Korea, and was promoted to Commander. Jonas was thinking of retiring from the Navy in 1958, but was offered a promotion to Captain, and decided to stay in. Captain Jonas Grumby finally retired five years later, after 28 years of Naval Service. He then invested his pension in a small charter operation...
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Somewhere in the South Pacific
March 8, 1968
Captain Jonas Grumby, USN (Ret.) seemed far away.
"Penny for your thoughts," offered Mrs. Howell
The Skipper replied, "Just thinking, what an adventure the last half century has been, and how fortunate I am to still be around. And how lucky I am that you all arehere with me."
Mary Ann sighed, "How sweet."
Skipper quickly regained his gruff facade and asked, "Did anybody bring a deck of cards? Lets get this party rolling!"
The castaways laughed and the festivities continued.