Hi, everyone! I'm relatively new to the Bones fandom, but please enjoy this little oneshot that I presenteth to you! Around a year ago, I co-wrote one similar to this for SVU, so I decided to do it for B/B, because they're just so cute!
I don't own Bones. If I did, Thursday would come MUCH sooner.
Temperance Brennan groaned as her partner and boyfriend Seeley Booth drove towards a children's store.
"Booth, I'm seven months along, we have plenty of time to shop for baby things."
He rolled his eyes. "Bones, you never know when you're gonna need stuff! You wouldn't have a baby shower, so we're taking a trip to the baby store." He parked in front of Babies R Us.
"Well, considering that the store sells infant supplies and not actual babies, the term baby store is misleading," Brennan argued.
"Can't you just say something cute for once?" Booth complained as they walked into the store. He immediately walked over to a rack of baby clothing. "We can just buy a few things. Then when we find out that I'm right and the baby's a girl, we'll come back."
"I never argued about the gender. My chances of carrying either are basically equal."
"Yeah, yeah, there's no magic way to tell without the doctor telling us. But I know we're having a girl." To further make his point, he grabbed a pink onesie with Daddy's Girl written on the front.
"Booth-"
"Trust me, Bones. I was right when Rebecca was pregnant with Parker, so I know I'm right this time." Booth turned to another shelf and looked at some brightly colored stuffed animals.
"I'd rather buy our child some more realistic toys, Booth. Unicorns are a myth, and dogs are not purple unless their owners dye their fur."
Booth rolled his eyes. "C'mon, Bones, kids don't care about how real their toys look. They just care about getting them."
"Alright," she agreed. "But when he or she gets older, I'm explaining to them that their playthings were incorrect."
"Whatever." Booth added several of the mythical and incorrect stuffed animals to their shopping cart while Brennan turned to look at a rack of unisex clothing.
A petite saleslady walked up to them. "Can I help you with anything?"
"We're good." Booth picked up a small tee shirt reading My Daddy Can Arrest Your Daddy. "Bones, look! We gotta get this."
"It is rather cute, despite the fact that it would only apply if the father of the other baby was a criminal." Brennan picked out a few simple outfits and put them on top of the pile of items that Booth had tossed into the cart.
"Choose some funnier things, Bones. Most of these unisex outfits are boring. Don't you want our daughter to look cute?"
"Clothing has nothing to do with the physical appearance of a baby," she argued. "Some outfits might be more amusing than others, but simple ones are just as suitable."
"Let me get this, too." He grabbed another onesie. Sorry, Guys. My Daddy Won't Let Me Date Until I'm 30, was written on the front.
"You aren't serious about that, are you? Because she would be humiliated if she was over eighteen and still living by your rules."
"Too bad, it's true." He grinned. "And you admitted that we're having a girl!"
"I was simply making an example, Booth. Just because I referred to the baby as she doesn't mean that I insist that she's going to be a girl."
"You did it again."
She groaned. "Let's just look at some gender neutral furniture." She eyed a simple wooden crib. "This one is nice."
"So is this one." Booth gestured to a pale blue one with butterflies painted on the back and sides. "And I promise, if we do have a boy, I'll bring all of this girl stuff back, okay?"
"But without a crib, we would have to either hold the baby all night or allow him to sleep in our bed, which could be dangerous."
"Then I'd get a new crib and put it together as soon as I got home."
She sighed. "But what about the rest of the room? You would have to repaint the entire nursery, and the paint fumes could be unhealthy for a young infant."
"I've got this," he insisted. Finally Brennan agreed, and they settled on the blue crib. "We can get the matching rocking chair, too," he added.
"Or you two can stop be so stubborn and let someone else buy something," a new voice spoke. Angela stepped up beside them.
"Ange, we can buy the furniture. It isn't that expensive compared to some of the other items in the store."
Angela rolled her eyes. "Bren, sweetie, you wouldn't let me throw you a baby shower, so at least let me buy the crib."
"It looks like you've already bought several outfits, unless they're for Michael. But considering that they're pink, I assume they aren't."
Booth nudged her. "See, Bones? Everyone knows that you're having a girl."
"Hodgins and Cam gave me their money, so I'm buying the crib and the changing table."
"Thanks, Ange." Booth grinned at her.
"You're welcome." Before Brennan could protest again, Angela told the clerk to ring up the table and chair. "Bren, you need to be more like Studly here and accept gifts."
Once they had paid for the rest of their purchases, Brennan's stomach rumbled. "If you two are so willing to spend money, I'm craving cherry pie."
Booth stared at her in awe. "You… and pie?"
"Don't insult me, Booth, I'm a heavily pregnant woman. Cravings for food that I don't enjoy are completely natural."
"Then pie it is."
Okay, I had fun writing this. Want to.. hmm… maybe just leave me a review?
As an extra note, ImHereAndTyping demanded repeatedly that I post.