Disclaimer: I don't own LOTR, but I do own 20 Legolas bookmarks! (stolen from the library).
This diary is an account of what legolas might have seen during the quest, and his thoughts on the matter.Plus, Elrond made him do it. This story got me an A+ in my college English class! Enjoy.
The Legolas Diaries
By: J-chan
Day 1: I have decided to take on a quest today, so I'm going to keep a journal of it. Plus Elrond gave it to me and said he'd kill me if I didn't keep it up. I hate writing, but here it goes: Our quest consists of two dirty men, four annoying hobbits, an uptight wizard, a stinking dwarf, and myself. We are setting out to destroy an evil ring. I don't know what for, I think it's a pretty ring myself. Elrond says if we don't It'll cover all the lands in sick and darkness, but I think he's full of dragon shit. Well, enough writing for today. I'm going to go pack for this fool's errand they're calling a quest. Father's going to be furious when he finds out.
Day 2: Today started out just perfect! I'm being sarcastic, can you tell? I woke up today with the worst bed-head imaginable. It was sticking straight up and no amount of coaxing would make it go down. I finally had to surrender and make a visit to Arwen and her hight-endurance brushing. But not before I had to chase down the idiot hobbits who stole my clothes as a joke. After I had retrieved my clothing, and let Arwen untangle my hair, I went down to breakfast only to discover that there was none left! The greedy little hobbits had eaten it all. I sulked off to the kitchen and grabbed some lembas bread instead. Man can this day get any worse!
Day 4: Well, we're three days into this quest and so far no one has died yet. Yay! Aragorn tried to prove his prowess at climbing trees today, and ended up falling into a stream. So we were forced to sit around the fire with a grumpy ranger who's pride had been severely dented. Not fun. Especially when he keeps naming all his faults just so people would feel sorry for him. "I'm not fit to be king" this, and "I can't protect anyone" that. Aragorn's behavior has brought me to one conclusion: Men are losers!
Day 26: We. Are. Screwed! Gandalf is lost! He decided to take us through the Mines of Moria after asking freaking Frodo where we should go! Rule number one in navigating: Do NOT ask the hobbit which way to go. A giant octopus tried to eat the ring-bearer, and about botched the whole mission. I'm starting to believe hobbits are bad luck. Aragorn is furious because Merry and Pippin ate his rations.The ones he fell out the tree for. The dwarf, in a bout of hunger ate a strange looking carrot, and he's starting to turn a green color. I think it might have been a poison root. We'll find out soon. Wow, hey! Gandalf finally remembers where we are! Big surprise. -.-
Day 46: Gandalf is feared dead. He fell into a pit with a balrog, and the rest of the fellowship has agreed that it is not a survivable fate. Currently we are all hanging out in Lothlorien with my cousin Galadriel. She's pretty cool. She has lots of food and beds for us so that's awesome. But as I thought, it didn't last. I accidentally shot a squirrel during archery practice today, and Celeborn kicked us out for cruelty to animals. That guy is wierd. Oh well, good riddance! Except for Galadriel, she's cool. I'll probably visit again if this quest doesn't kill me first. As a matter of fact, I don't care if Elrond kills me for it, I'm ending this stupid journal. Goodbye to everyone who has enough time on their hands to read this.
-Legolas ( aka a super hot disgruntled elf) .
Sorry to end this so abruptly, but I was doing this assignment the day it was due and in the hour it was due so it had to be short.I know, bad J-chan (smack smack). I hope you liked it though, my English proffessor sure did. 10 out of 10 baby, yeah! Anyway, see ya next fic.+ don't forget to review. .
J-chan