She was angry, angrier than he'd ever seen her. She had stayed calm throughout their emergency meeting, aside from the tears that had fallen before they went into the room - the ones accompanied by her saying she loved him. She loved him, even though at the moment she was furious with him.
They sat in her office waiting for the security team to escort them to their condo. "Aren't you gonna say something, Sharon?"
She shook her head. "We'll talk at home."
Meaning she was too angry to risk opening her mouth. Should he dare? "I'm sorry."
She looked at him, incredulous. "You're sorry? For what exactly?"
He shrugged. "Everything, I guess."
"You...you don't realize...do you have any idea how much danger-"
"I live with you. I spend all my time here surrounded by cops. How much danger could I be in?"
"Just tell me why."
He looked at his shoes. "You know why, Sharon. You promised we'd never be strangers, that you'd always know me. If I have a new name, that won't be true anymore." He picked up his head, meeting her eyes. They were...softening. "And what about my mother? If she doesn't know where I am, I may never see her again. I don't want to lose...either of you."
She got up from her desk chair and went to him, hugging him to her. "You won't lose me, understand? Not like this. You're stuck with me."
He nodded and wrapped his arms around her. She felt strong and safe.
She released him and straightened. "This doesn't let you off the hook."
"I know, Sharon. And I'm...sorry."
"I know you are, honey. Me too."
His eyes widened. "Why?"
She shook her head sadly. He hated to see her so sad. He almost wished she were angry again.
"I'm sorry you felt you had to go through this alone. That must have been…"
"It was. I just...I'm used to...you know, going it alone."
"That's not true anymore, please remember that."
She looked like she wanted to say more, which was good because he had no idea what to say to that, but Flynn knocked on her door. She invited him in, and he looked at them like he was sorry he couldn't protect them. He liked Flynn - although not as much as Provenza - he was always nice to them, and he seemed to really like Sharon. Maybe he could ask Provenza about that some time. Flynn said the security team was ready to escort them home.
Sharon thanked him and led Rusty out of the office, as Flynn held the door for them. When Rusty walked through the door, Flynn placed his hand on Rusty's shoulder. "Hang in there, kid." Flynn glanced over at Sharon. "You too, Captain."
She and Rusty nodded solemnly. Then they met the security team in the murder room. They were two suits, a man and a woman. Armed, obviously, but they looked like they'd be cool, and they were there to protect him and Sharon, so he could live with that. For the time being anyway. He was angry enough to risk taking on the letter writer himself, but he wouldn't share that with Sharon. She was already mad at him as it was.
Sharon introduced herself and Rusty to the detail, and they were on their way home.
/
The detail stood outside their door, and Sharon and Rusty went into the kitchen. They worked together with ease. She opened the fridge. "Burgers?"
He nodded, pleasantly surprised she would choose his favorite. Especially when he knew he was in trouble. He got out the frying pan, and she prepared the meat.
When they had dinner on the table and were sitting down to eat, he opened up the floor. "I know you're mad. I just...would you let me have it?"
She sighed. "I'm not sure you can understand the range of emotions I'm feeling right now." She put up her hand. "That doesn't mean I won't share them, I just want you to know, how...overwhelmed I am."
"Tell me."
"I'm angry, yes. I'm angry that you kept this from me. I'm angry that I didn't pay closer attention to you. I'm angry with Stroh for putting you in this position in the first place."
"I'm sorry I kept it from you. I...I should have trusted you. That you'd know what to do and keep me safe. I just...Emma kept saying things about witness protection-"
She pat his shoulder. "Rusty, honey, you never needed to worry about her or what she says. She just...talks." She took a bite of her burger and made that sound that meant she enjoyed her food. "We make a pretty good team, don't we?"
He nodded and bit into his burger. It was true. Whenever they worked through something together, it worked.
They finished their dinner, and Rusty loaded the dishwasher, being extra careful with the dishes and glasses like Sharon had taught him. Then they went into the living room. "All right, let's have a serious conversation."
"Are you going to punish me?"
She shook her head. "I think the security detail will drive you crazy enough as it is." She reached for his hand. "I know none of this is your fault, and you would have had this security all summer."
"I can't even go to school now, Sharon. I'm gonna be so lonely."
"I know. We'll have to work through that together. I used to read a lot when I was lonely."
"Were you...lonely a lot?"
She nodded. "I didn't have a lot of friends growing up. And I usually like to keep to myself."
"I thought there would be more yelling tonight."
"I could if you want."
He snorted.
"I just want you to understand about your safety. All summer I asked for two things: be kind and be safe. By hiding those letters, you were neither. You were potentially putting yourself at risk every day. And you were lying to me, which isn't kind."
"I'm sorry, Sharon. I...I didn't see it that way."
"I know you didn't. But I want you to for the future. When something like that is happening, I want you to be safe, respectful, and honest." She gazed into his eyes. "Can you do that for me, Rusty?"
He nodded.
She smiled but it didn't reach her eyes. She was still...sad and scared. "Now, why don't you go to bed? It's been a long day. You need your rest."
He sighed. "Sometimes...I...uh have trouble sleeping."
"Me too." She thought for a moment and snapped her fingers. "I got it! Why don't we put a boring movie on, and we can make fun of it until we get tired."
That sounded like...fun. "Okay."
She went to get her blanket. He rolled his eyes. She was always cold, but she didn't turn up the thermostat because he was always hot. It was...nice that she did that for him. He moved to the controls on the wall. "What are you doing?" She walked by, blanket in hand.
"I'm kind of cold tonight, Sharon. Maybe we could turn it up a few degrees."
She gave him that look like she was trying to read him. Then she smiled. "I'll find a movie."
He raised the thermostat and returned to the sofa. She was curled up in her blanket and he sat on the other end. She chose a black and white movie, but it looked interesting. At least it wasn't a silent one.
Before long, she was snoring softly. He kissed her cheek and whispered that he loved her. He made sure she was fully covered under the blanket, turned the tv off, and went to his room.
He could handle her terms, but he wasn't sure he could deal with the constant security or the loneliness. But if it meant staying with Sharon, he was willing to try.