This is a really sad story. Like, I don't know what's up with my brain sad. Well, maybe not that sad, but in truth, my brain is very weird.
Anyway, I hope you like it. Very out of character, very not real at all. These two (except super sleepy Ross these days) are the happiest people in the world and it's true. Both their careers are going great right now.
Just a note, they're both fifteen in this and don't change their ages at all.
If you guess where I got the hug line from and then the scene of them in the car, I'll... I dont know, reward you with something. You just tell me what you want. I dont own both the ideas.
I don't own anything really, just the idea for this story.
Enjoy.
"If I died tonight, how would you feel?"
He tilted his head in confusion at his best friend's words. Before that moment he had never heard her speak so negatively about anything. It was something he hadn't expected from her at all.
She blinked and looked away, instead choosing to look up at the sparkling stars above them.
"Would I have left my legacy?" She asked.
"Maybe," He answered back and sighed, "maybe we both would have."
Her hand was soon on top of his and she squeezed it, squeezing her eyes shut. He laced their fingers together a moment later and then he just held her hand in his.
She was nervous, he could feel it. Their show was going to premiere for the first time in front of audiences the next night and they were both terrified of what people would think. It was his first time being in a TV show, her first starring role (actually it was his as well, but he wanted to give her something).
"Don't be nervous," He whispered and she opened her eyes to look at him, "our show is going to kick ass."
She smiled at him and he smiled back at her.
"That is against the rules, Mr. Lynch," She teased and he rolled his eyes, knowing she was talking about his cursing.
"Well then, Miss Marano, just call me a bad boy, because good boys don't get very far in life."
She was quiet for a second. Then, "good girls don't either." She whispered.
He had to make sure he heard her right by repeating her words over and over in his head.
He decided it was just her nerves talking and reassuringly squeezed her hand.
She squeezed back and that was when he realized they hadn't let go of the other's hand in over half an hour.
He walked into her dressing room the morning the show was set to premiere, amused and confused.
"Why are you lying upside down on the couch?" He asked her, "you're backwards." He made a face, "and not that I"m complaining because this is my all time favorite movie, but why are you listening to the Lion King?"
Laura opened her eyes, "because it calms me, it's relaxing." He noticed her hands were shaking just a bit.
"Don't be nervous." He told her, helping her get up and then sitting down beside her on the couch. "Remember what I said last night? Our show is going to kick ass."
"Do you think so?" She asked him.
He nodded, "I know so."
"Are you just saying that because your family has full faith in it or do you really believe that?"
Where all this was coming from, he had no idea. But again, he just figured she was just nervous.
"I really and truly believe it." He answered a moment later.
She laced her arm with his and then she laced their fingers, "okay." She whispered.
"What if nobody shows up?" Raini asked as they all drove towards the premiere party in the limo the creators of the show had rented for the night.
"That would be embarrassing," Calum commented.
Ross had been staring out the window, deep in thought. He looked over at Laura who was nervously linking her fingers together and staring out the window as well.
"Don't worry." He finally said, "people will show up."
"How do you know that?" Laura asked him and he just shrugged.
"Someone's gotta think positive in this car." He answered back and then her hand was on top of his. She laced their fingers together and he gave her a reassuring squeeze.
"Hey lovebirds," Calum called out and they both looked up at him, breaking their moment. "Look outside." They did and saw signs with their character names and their names and fans and everyone cheering and jumping like crazy when the limo pulled up to the curb.
"Holy shit." Ross said ignoring the pinch in his arm from Laura.
"How do they even know about our show already?" Laura asked, her eyes wide with awe.
"Promos on Disney Channel, sneak peeks and spoilers, I guess," Raini answered.
Ross' phone rang and he pulled it out to see it was his sister calling him. "Hello?" He answered.
"Ross! I am so excited for you!" She squealed, "Vanessa's with me and she's screaming and I am, and I'm about a hundred percent sure everyone wants to kick us out of this car, but holy crap. I am so proud of you!"
He grinned, "Thanks, Rye." He answered back as everyone else yelled out shouts of congrats, he put it on speaker, waving his hand to get everyone's attention.
"Go out there and kick ass," Rydel said to him.
He looked up at his castmates and shared a smile.
"We will." He promised.
The fans were insane.
And not like mildly insane but super crazy insane.
Ross couldn't believe it.
"Two fifteen year old take on the world," He heard Laura say beside him and smiled at her.
"We're gonna be the greatest fifteen year olds to ever live." He said into her ear so she could hear him and she smiled.
"Hell yeah!" She said and then he laughed.
They went to go sign autographs and as they did, a girl somehow got ahold of Ross' jacket. She pulled it off of him and then squealed when she realized she was holding it, while meanwhile he was being attacked by other girls trying to get his shirt.
Security quickly moved Laura and everyone else inside, helping him as well and taking the jacket from the girl. He breathed out a sigh of relief as soon as the doors closed behind them, blocking out the screaming fans. He looked up at his castmates and then they all shared a look, shock, awe, and a bit of fear.
But the fear soon went away.
They all cheered, fist pumps, high fives, hugs and squeals resonated throughout the empty foyer as they jumped up and down in a circle, laughing and cheering.
"That shit was crazy!" Ross exclaimed.
"Dude! Look at your shirt, we have to get you a new shirt!" Calum responded as the girls laughed and talked excitedly with each other.
"Ross what on earth happened to your shirt?"
Ross turned around to see his mother was standing behind him, a concerned look on her face.
"Fans went a little crazy, whatever. Mom, they like us and the show hasn't even aired yet!" He excitedly told her.
"I'm happy for you, really I am," His mother smiled at him to let him know she wasn't bluffing, "but I'm worried about you and a shirt."
"He could go shirtless." Laura said, behind them and he turned around to look at her, "what? It's just an idea."
"That might make everyone out there faint," Rocky said, having walked into the foyer and overheard the last part of the conversation, "but for myself, my brothers and my sister, we might puke."
Everyone laughed.
"Where's everyone else?" Ross asked.
"Outside, they're just waiting to come, don't worry, they'll be here soon," Stormie answered and Ross nodded. "Alright, let's go find you a new shirt."
Ross nodded again and followed his mother towards the bathrooms. In the corner of his eye, he saw Laura bite her lip and then blush.
He smiled.
He was surprised to find a lot of people were crying.
The show was a comedy after all, not a drama.
His mother was crying, his sister was crying, Laura's mother and sister were crying, and then he looked at his costars, Raini and Laura. Raini had tears in her eyes, but she was smiling. Laura had actual tears streaming down her cheeks.
"Why are you crying?" Ross quietly asked her.
"Because," She answered, "we were so innocent."
"What makes you think we still aren't?"
She looked at him, sniffling, "we're only going to get older and the older we get, the less innocent we become."
"What makes you say that?"
"You're in a band, it won't be long until you become a rockstar and you know doing rockstar things. Trying to break free from this Disney image, you're going to want to get more and more rebellious." She explained.
He thought it over for a moment. "And what about you?"
She shrugged, "I'll always be that innocent Disney girl."
"That's not a bad thing."
"Yeah, okay. But I want to leave a legacy, you know? In case I die tomorrow or something, I want to leave behind something memorable about me."
"Why are you talking about death? You never have before." Ross asked her, blinking his eyes in confusion.
"Because it's life and it's what it is. We're all going to die someday and I want to make sure I'm remembered as something other than an innocent Disney girl with stage fright." Laura responded back.
"What about being remembered for just being yourself?" Ross asked her, "what's wrong with that?"
"Nothing's wrong with that." Laura sighed, "nothing's wrong with it at all."
He looked at the TV screen, "maybe being as innocent as were-are-isn't such a bad thing. Let's stay that way for as long as we can."
She stared at him for a few seconds and then slowly nodded her head. "Okay." She said quietly.
"Congrats baby bro!" Rocky interrupted their conversation and immediately they were forced to put on fake smiles for their families and friends who had come to support them.
"The show was great, so worth waiting our life spans for it to come out." Riker added and Ross nodded.
"Thanks guys." He told them, hugging them as Laura did the same and her sister and mother walked over to them.
They shared a look and that was when Ross was starting to wonder if there was something up with Laura.
They were back on set, about to go to a table read, when Laura's phone went off. Since Ross was the only one in the room and she was with Raini, going over lines and would be back any second, he decided it was best not to snoop.
So he didn't.
She came in literally a second after the phone went off and then checked it.
He didn't have to wonder about what was in the message for too much longer.
"Want to go to a party with me tonight?" She asked him, "a friend from school is throwing it."
"Won't we be recognized?" He asked her. "And besides, we have homework and curfew and early call times. My parents won't let me out of the house tonight."
She shrugged, "so, sneak out then. That's what I'm doing."
This was so out of character for her. She wasn't like this. Nothing like this. The girl he met was yes, a free spirit and totally goofy and yogurt loving and told jokes that only she found funny.
She wasn't anything like the person who was standing in front of him.
But he wasn't about to let her go to a party by herself.
"Okay." He agreed quietly, "I'll go, I'll do it."
The party was insane. Totally not Laura's scene. Then again, she was starting to become somebody he hardly recognized these days.
Sneaking out wasn't as hard as he thought. He had just gone through the window of his bedroom and that was it. Well, the drop that was a few feet high was a little scary, but he was over it soon enough.
"Who's party is this?" He shouted at her over the loud music. They had been there for over an hour and he already wanted to go home.
"A friend's." She responded back, sitting down beside him, she handed him a drink and he warily took it from her giving her a look. "Don't worry, I didn't poison you."
"Yeah, that's reassuring," He answered back as she titled her head back and basically chugged her drink. He took that moment to look over what she was wearing.
A bustier, short skirt and some kind of sandal heel thing. Totally inappropriate for a fifteen year old girl. Though, he had to admit she looked hot with her make up and everything-no. No, he wasn't going to start thinking of her as more than a friend. That would just lead to heartache for them both.
"Come on!" She said into his ear, loud enough he could hear it. She grabbed his hands, pulling him up. He quickly drank his drink, not really sure what to do with it and then followed her to the dance floor. She stopped and turned towards him, letting go of his hands she started to dance against him, her arms soon going around his neck as his hands went to her waist.
He blinked and shook his head. Whatever she had given him was starting to affect him. He felt fuzzy, almost like he was… gonna pass out, but not in a bad way. In a more, calm and relaxing way.
He danced with her because he felt like if he didn't then all that time, energy and money his parents spent on dance lessons would have been a total waste and he didn't want that.
The song switched to a slower one and Laura pulled him against her. He stumbled forward a bit, but caught himself as he hadn't been expecting it. Her fingers went to his hair and she put her head on his shoulder.
He had no fucking idea what was going on. Not that it was freaking him out, he was just confused.
"Thanks for coming with me." She said into his ear as they slowly moved together. "You have no idea how much it means to me."
He nodded, "yeah, of course, anytime." Because what else was he supposed to say?
The song switched to a faster one again and he took a deep breath.
"Come with me." She said and took his hand, he looked down at their hands and watched as she laced their fingers and pulled on his hand to follow her. He walked with her all the way to the backyard and breathed out a sigh of relief. Outside meant fresh air, and he was pretty positive he needed it.
She let go of his hand and then her hands went to the bottom of her dress. She picked it up and over her head, throwing it to the side. He watched her, mesmerized.
"What are you-"
"Let's go swimming," She said, leaning in closer to him. He followed her eyes to the sparkling pool beside them.
"Okay." He said, realizing at that moment they weren't the only ones out there and that anyone could just look their way and see that she was half naked. "But um, let's do it at my house, you um, you're-just put your dress back on." Officially flustered, he picked up her dress, covered his eyes and handed it to her.
She laughed, actually laughed.
"Why are you laughing?" He asked her, motioning for her to take the dress.
"Because you're so cute," She said, her laughter turned into giggles.
He looked down, his hand holding the dress, dropping down by his side.
"You think I'm cute? Is that what you just said?"
She nodded, "yeah, it is." She blushed, then looked behind her at the party. "Want to get out of here?"
Hell yeah, he wanted to get out of there.
He gave her a smile and she smiled back, taking his hand in hers again, she laced them and then led him out of the party.
Opening his eyes, he squinted at the bright sun. He felt a bit nauseous, so he sat up, hoping the feeling would go away. He hadn't realized it, but after a few moments, he felt itchy and then looked down at his hands to see he was sitting on grass and he was very confused. His confusion only grew when he saw that Laura was lying right beside him, peacefully asleep.
"Laura, wake up," He whispered, gently shaking her.
He also realized that he had pretty much spent the night with his costar. That was kinda freaky.
She slowly did and blinked at him, sitting up. She ran her fingers through her hair and sleepily looked at him, "good morning."
"Yeah, good morning, where the hell are we?" He asked her.
She shrugged, "I have no idea."
His eyes widened slightly and he tried to think hard and see if he could remember anything about the night before.
The party.
Laura taking her dress off.
And after that, he remembered nothing else.
Oh yeah, tripping and falling on top of her on the grass, that he remembered.
"My mom is going to kill me," He groaned, his head going to his hands, he shook it.
"Why?" She asked him.
He looked at her, "I'll give you a few obvious reasons, I'm not home, it's early morning, oh yeah and we have a call time probably now and it's god knows what time since we don't have a clock, or phones or anything!" He stood up and turned around, he kicked the tree frustratedly and ran his fingers through his hair.
Laura jumped and stood up too, "would you relax?"
"Relax? Laura! Nobody knows were we are. We have to work today. I have band rehearsal and I'm so dead because at this point I'd say it's pretty obvious that I snuck out to be with you at the party last night!"
"Seriously, stop." She said back and he looked like he was about to punch the tree again. "Nobody's freaking out."
"Really?" He responded, his tone sarcastic. "And why wouldn't they be freaking out, why don't you care?" He shouted at her.
"Because no one cares about me!" She shouted back, blurting it out. Her eyes widened and her hands went to her mouth. He knew then that that was something she had wanted to keep to herself.
"What?" His tone was quiet and in disbelief.
"Nothing." She shook her head, "let's just, go, get out of here." She pushed passed him, but he grabbed her wrist and spun her around. "Let me go!" She shouted at him.
"Not until you explain what you just told me," He said, holding onto her wrist tighter, but not enough to hurt her. "What do you mean nobody cares about you?"
"They just don't, let me go!"
"Stop fighting me and shutting me out, Laura," He said, his tone sharper, "I'm not going to let you do that."
It took about two minutes, her eyes watered and tears streamed down her face. He hadn't meant to make her cry and immediately felt bad, but he wanted an answer.
"Can we talk about this later?" She asked, her tone almost begging him. "I don't want to talk about this right now."
"Laura, I-" He stopped speaking and then slowly nodded his head. "Okay." He answered back.
"Okay." She responded and then he let go of her. She stepped back and then turned around. "There's a trail here, I know the way back." She said quietly and he nodded, just following her in silence as they walked back to the road.
After walking Laura home and making sure she got there safety, he took some time to think on his way back to his house. Laura was sad, she said nobody at home cared about her and now he was more confused then ever.
He opened the front door to the house, only to be greeted by Rocky who was sitting in the living room playing guitar. He looked up as soon as the door opened.
"Dude, where have you been?"
"I need to talk to mom." Was the answer Ross gave him. "Where is she?"
"She's… upstairs with Rydel, is everything okay?" He asked and Ross looked down. He shrugged.
"I-I don't know." He answered back.
Rocky looked concerned but before he could ask more questions, his mother came down the stairs and breathed out a sigh of relief.
"I thought I heard you down here, where have you been?"
"I need to talk to you." Ross answered, much like the one he'd given to Rocky. "I know I'm in so much trouble, but I really need to talk to you."
"What's wrong?" She asked, her tone concerned. "Is everything okay?"
Ross shook his head, "I-I don't know." He answered back. He looked up, "I think something's wrong with Laura."
"Laura?" Rocky asked, confused, "as in Laura, the girl who works with you?"
Ross nodded.
"What's wrong?" Stormie asked him.
"I don't know," He responded, "she's been acting weird lately and she told me nobody cares about her."
"I'm sure that's not true." Stormie assured him.
"Mom, she's… she's sad. Like, really sad, all the time. She asked me once if she died, how I would feel about it." Ross admitted to her. "I'm scared she's going to do something mom and I don't know how to stop it from happening if she does do something really, really bad." His eyes filled with tears and immediately Stormie hugged him close.
"Oh, honey, it's going to be okay." She pulled away and gave him a reassuring smile, wiping the tears from under his eyes. "I know it's hard, this kind of stuff. It's heavy. And you're only fifteen years old, nobody expects you to make sense of it yet."
"I know, but I want to help her. I'm really scared there's nothing I can do to help."
"Right now, I don't know what we can do, other than talk to her and her family. See if anybody's noticed anything off about her as well," Stormie said, "but just keep an eye on her okay? And if you notice anything wrong, talk to someone. Immediately." Ross nodded and then Stormie hugged him again. She looked up at Rocky who just gave him a hug next.
Ross, meanwhile, was just so confused and at a loss for what to do.
"Go upstairs and get changed, you're late for work, we'll talk more about this later." Stormie said and Ross nodded, he broke his hug with Rocky and then ran up the stairs to his room. Getting dressed, he decided that no matter what it took, he was going to get a smile out of Laura that day.
"So are you grounded for life?" He looked at Laura who was beside him. He was sitting on top of the counter on the Sonic Boom set and she was behind him, looking up at him. They were alone, since Calum and Raini weren't in the scene and the crew was getting everything ready for the next shot.
He shrugged, "we didn't really talk about a punishment," He mumbled, playing with his fingers. He looked at her, "what about you?"
She shrugged, "they didn't even notice I was gone all night." She said quietly and he opened his mouth to ask her something, but before he could, she changed the subject. "We should go over our lines, they're going to shoot soon."
He didn't want to wait any longer, but knew it was probably the best choice to.
So, he just nodded his head. "Okay." He said quietly.
"Okay." She responded back, just as quietly.
"Hey, so my mom and I are going out for dinner, you want to join us?" Ross asked, sticking his head into Laura's dressing room. She had her head down and was drawing something in her notebook. He had caught a glimpse of it and noticed that it was a picture of a sad girl. Pretty dark, but she closed it before he could see more of it.
"Yeah, sure." She answered, packing away her schoolbooks, she grabbed her notebook and took it with her. His hand stopped her from going farther. His original idea was to talk to her, but instead he held out his hand.
She, meanwhile, had been panicking that he was going to grab her notebook, but when she saw his hand out, she breathed out a sigh of relief (which she was pretty sure he noticed) and smiled. She took his hand in hers and then they walked out of the dressing room together, hand in hand.
"You two are pretty cute together," Stormie commented as they ate their dinner. Laura and Ross looked at each other and made a face, but then Ross picked up one of her fries and tapped her nose with it. She giggled and swatted his hand away. She then stuck her tongue out at him and he laughed, grabbing her wrists. She tried to fight him, but he won and then stole a fry from her.
"Ugh! I hate you!" She said and he laughed, opening his mouth wide, he ate the fry and smiled at her.
"I love you too, Laura." He responded and then stole another fry. Her mouth dropped open and he just laughed.
She stared at him for a few moments, her eyes frequently going to him after he had finished stealing her fries. He was cute, she had to admit that. Both inside and out, physically and his personality. She constantly told herself he'd never fall for a girl like her. She wasnt anything special.
But he always brought out the best in her, her happier side.
And that was something she never wanted to hold on to for as long as she could.
"Hey Rossy Shor." He soon felt someone drop down beside him and looked to his left to see his sister was sitting beside him. Her tone had been soft. "Whatcha up to?"
He shrugged, "nothing really, watching Family Guy."
"Gonna go see Laura today?" She asked him and he nodded.
"She's doing some kind of charity event right now with her sister, but she told me she'd be home later today." He looked at the clock, "I'm just waiting until it's five."
Rydel nodded and then turned to face him, "I heard from Rocky that you were really worried about her the other day." She looked down at her fingers and then back up at him, "He also told me why and um, this is coming from a girl's point of view. I think that you… should talk to her, ask her what's going on. It seems to me that you're one of the few people she trusts."
"I guess, yeah." He answered, turning the volume down and facing her. "But I can't just flat out ask her, she has to come to me… right?"
Rydel shrugged, "I think she just wants reassurance."
"Reassurance?"
She nodded, "yeah, reassurance that no matter what, you'll always be there for her."
"Well, of course. I'm not going anywhere. She knows that."
Rydel shrugged, "she might not."
He raised an eyebrow, "what's that supposed to mean?"
"It's like… me and Ellington," Rydel said, "he's my best friend and I know that no matter what he'll be there for me. Whether he has a girlfriend, I have a boyfriend or whatever. We're not going to leave each other no matter what."
"Where is this going?"
"Let me finish," She told him, pausing for a second to take a deep breath, "I didn't believe he'd always be there for me at first. When he started dating Kelly, he spent all his time with her and I was-"
"Jealous?"
"Left out," She corrected him, "I didn't think he'd be there for me anymore and it hurt."
"So, what, I have to prove to her I'll always be there for her by getting a girlfriend?"
Rydel shook her head, "no, you just have to tell her and reassure her. And if she does break and tell you what's going on, then listen."
He nodded, "okay, I think I can do that."
Rydel smiled at him, "I know you can, because you are the most compassionate, gentle and loving guy I know."
Ross tilted his head, "I thought Ellington was."
She shook her head, "nope, you're definitely number one." She smiled at him and he smiled back.
He slowly walked up the front pathway of Laura's house, thinking over his talk with Rydel, so deep in thought he hadn't realized he was standing in front of the front door until he almost ran into it.
Just as he raised his hand to knock on the door, he heard the sound of yelling.
"I don't need my medication! I hate it!" He soon realized it was Laura yelling and tried to focus more on what she was yelling.
"Yes you do! You've been off them for weeks now and look what it's doing to you! You punched someone at the event today, Laura! That isn't okay! Now take your medication or I'm going to-"
"Going to what? Tell mom and dad? They don't care about me, they never did! And it's all your fault!" Laura was almost screaming.
"My fault? How?"
"It just is!" She yelled back at her, "I hate you! And I hate them! Now, leave me alone!" She shouted back at her and with that the yelling stopped. He raised his hand to knock on the door, but before he could, the door opened and Laura walked out. She clearly wasn't paying attention to him because she collided into him, causing him to fall to the ground. Her eyes widened and she helped him up. "I am so sorry, oh my god! Are you okay?"
"I'm fine, really. It's not as bad as you think it is. My ass broke my fall," He assured her. He then studied her for a few seconds, "are you okay?"
She smiled, "totally fine!" She said in a over to top cheery voice and then he saw her (fake) smile drop as she walked passed him. But he wasn't going to let her leave that easily, not that time.
So he grabbed her wrist and tugged her towards him, turning her around.
"I won't leave you." He said to her and she just stared at him. "Not ever, I'm not going anywhere. No matter how much I may make you angry or if you just don't ever want to talk to me anymore, I'm not leaving you. Not even we're eighty, old, and I'm dominating you in UNO in whatever home we live in." He was staring right into her eyes, he hoped that helped make it so she knew he wasn't bluffing. "I really, really care about you and I just want you to know that."
She was silent, staring at him and he thought he had gotten to her, when suddenly she yanked her wrist from his hold and backed away, shaking her head. He saw tears in her eyes.
"No, no you can't say those things to me, nobody's ever said that to me. If they would have then all it would have been is a lie. I don't believe you." She said, her tone shaky.
"I'm not lying, Laura, I really care about you, you know that."
"Stop it! Stop lying to me!" She yelled at him.
He shook his head and then without a second thought, he walked up to her and wrapped his arms tightly around her, hugging her close.
"Come on, Ross, let me go!" She said and he shook his head.
"Laura this is a hug, okay? This is a hug! And this is when you hug somebody, when you care about them and you want them to know that!" He hugged her tighter and she made a noise of protest. "Now, I am not leaving here until you tell me what's going on. Okay. We will stay here all night if we have to. I don't care."
He started to loosen his hold on her and leaned back to look at her. She bit her lip, tears in her eyes and streaming down her cheeks as she shook her head. He waited for a few moments and then she said it.
"I'm messed up."
"Why?"
"I'm really messed up."
"Why?" He repeated, "what's wrong?"
She pointed to her head, "up here, I have a disorder. I'm, I-" She stopped speaking and he let her go. She walked a few feet away and sat down on the front stoop of her house. He sat down beside her, his hand going on top of hers. He saw the reassurance it gave her.
"It's okay," He spoke gently, "you can tell me. You can tell me anything."
She looked at him, "promise you won't think of me differently?"
He shook his head, "never."
She nodded, "okay."
"Okay." He repeated and then she closed her eyes and took a deep breath.
"I um, I have Dissociative Identity Disorder," She told him, her eyes closed. He then looked at her, "you know when you have more than one identity."
"You do?" He asked and she nodded. He knew about that and knew that it was caused by something traumatic that had happened in the person with the disorder's life.
"I know that you've noticed I've been um, acting differently lately and this is me, this is Laura." She paused again and took a deep breath, "the other.. me, I guess you could say is Lori. It's a nickname my um, my uncle used to call me when I was a child and um, he… would," She closed her eyes shut, tears streaming down her cheeks again. Ross immediately hugged her, rocking her back and forth as she softly cried. She shook her head, her arms wrapping around him and hugged him tight. She sobbed into his shoulder and he just held her tighter.
After a few minutes she had calmed down and was wiping her eyes when she continued to speak. "He would touch me, in inappropriate places and would make me feel so gross. Everytime he did it, he called me Lori. He thought it was a sweet pet name or something but all it did was think of those memories. So, then Lori became the badass and the partier and… everything else that was the complete opposite of me."
"So, the girl that I went to the party with, that wasn't you?"
She shook her head, "I can't control it when she comes out, because she does. A lot. And it's scary, but there's nothing I can do about it, but take medication, which I stopped doing because she said it made her feel like shit."
"Laura, forget about her, she's…she's not you, you're you. You're my best friend. You're the person I like and love being around, I don't know Lori, I only know Laura."
"I know." She said, her tone breaking, "but the medication makes me feel shitty too but-"
"But nothing." Ross told her, "you need it, you really need it and I get the whole medication making you feel like shit thing."
She tilted her head, "what do you mean?"
"I'm bipolar." He answered her, her eyes widened slightly. "I go from extreme depression to over the top happy, but usually when I'm off my meds for a long period of time. I've learned to control it and you need to control yourself as well."
"You're bipolar?" Laura asked. "But you've need been nothing but-"
"You probably haven't noticed it, which is understandable, but I hid it. I didn't want anyone to know and when I knew an episode was coming, I'd hide out in my dressing room or leave early. Kevin and Heath know, so they usually allow me to go. I always have to have someone in my family with me at all times in case something happens, but listen to me. Okay?" She nodded and he continued. He took both her hands in his and laced them. "I can't lose you okay? You are special to me and knowing that in real life Austin and Ally are two messed up people is both pretty cool and sad. I get it, I get the frustration of constantly having to take medication, but if you don't you could die and that is the last thing I want to happen to you okay?" His eyes filled with tears as he spoke to her and he hugged her tight. He softly cried and it made her cry again. "Please don't leave me." He whispered and it was such a heartbreaking moment that it just made her sob out loud and hold on to him tighter.
"So, how did it go?" Rydel asked Ross. She walked into his room, sitting down beside him on his bed. He moved over so that she could have a place to sit and lifted his head to look at her. She noticed then that he'd been crying. "Ross?"
"She's sick," He whimpered and pointed to his head, "like really sick, like me sick, maybe worse."
"Oh, Ross." She said, her heart breaking for her younger brother and immediately she hugged him. She held him as he cried into her shoulder. "I"m sorry."
She hugged him tighter and rocked him back and forth. He calmed down and looked up at her, pulling away.
"How did you know?" She asked him.
"She told me." He wiped his eyes. "She told me she has Dissociative Identity Disorder, which is what I had been misdiagnosed with at first, remember? I read a lot about it and… that's how I knew how bad it was." He sniffled. "Her uncle sexually abused her when she was a kid and I don't know much more since she didnt talk about her family like at all, but after just hearing that I pretty much break down. But it explains a lot, like why she was suddenly talking about death, why she wanted me to go with her to the party, why she.. turned into a rebel so suddenly. She stopped taking her medication and… that's why she was acting the way she was." He paused to take a deep breath.
"Ross, I know this is hard, especially for you, since you're only fifteen, but if she's not taking care of herself then that's her decision, there isn't anything you can do about that." Rydel gently told him.
He nodded, "I know, but I just want to be there for her."
"And you still can be." Rydel assured him. "She's not going anywhere as far as I can tell, but if she gets worse, she might get sent away."
"I know." He looked down at his hands, "I just… I like her a lot, you know? I don't want to lose her." He didn't know what he meant by that exactly, but the look on Rydel's face told him she knew what it meant, even if he didn't understand it quite yet.
"Come here," She said, holding her arms out and he nodded, falling into her hug, she hugged him tightly.
They both heard the doorbell ring downstairs and slowly broke the hug.
"You'll be fine," She whispered, "and with time, so will Laura."
She couldn't promise that, he knew, but the reassurance was something he really needed and he was grateful for it.
"Ross?" They both looked up to see Laura was standing in the doorway to his bedroom. "Your brother let me in, um, Ryland," She said just to clarify even though it wasn't necessary. "I uh, I need to talk to you."
He nodded and Rydel gave his hand a squeeze before getting up. She gave Laura a tight hug and then walked out of the room. Laura watched her leave for a second and then turned back to face Ross. She slowly stepped forward and sat down on the end of his bed, just a few feet away from him.
It was silent. They both didn't know what to say.
"Thank you," She finally said, looking up at him. He looked up at her in surprise. "Thank you, for telling me about your disorder."
He nodded, "you told me yours and I didn't want to hide it from you anymore."
"It really means a lot to me." She said, "those things you said to me, all of it was true. I need to take my medication."
"Yeah, I get that it's shitty but it's what saves us and stops us from hurting ourselves." He repeated the words that had come from Rydel around the time he was diagnosed. He hadn't taken his medication at first either, but then she said, 'I know it's shitty, Ross, okay. I get that, but it's what's saving you right now and stopping you from hurting yourself.' Those words had really resonated with him and he never forgot them, no matter how shitty he was feeling. He would just think of that day and that was enough to remind him to take his medication. "You've got people in your life who love you, your sister, your parents…" He trailed off. "Me." He added.
"You?" She asked him and he nodded.
"Not like love love because that's a bit intense, but yeah, I do love you." He said.
That made her smile, "I love you too." She said.
He smiled and then motioned for her to join him on the bed, patting the spot beside him. She got up and then lied down, her hand going to his, she laced their fingers and then looked at him.
"I think I'm ready to tell you about my parents." He nodded. "Back when my uncle was doing what he was doing… I had kept it a secret, for a really long time, years, I think like two or something. Anyway, I finally told them and they didn't believe me. They told me I was crazy and that he'd never do that. Well, one time he did it when we were both home alone and I was screaming so loudly that I got the neighbors to call 911. The police came and then because he wouldn't do anything simply he fought against them almost killing me and someone else. They shot him, right in front of me and my parents came home then, thinking that I had just caused a whole ordeal for no reason. After that they kinda just stopped caring about me and it was just my sister who did. They always made trips to go to Italy and would take my sister, but never me. So, I got lonely. Lori became the only friend I had for the longest time. After about three months had passed, I guess I had tried to kill myself and my sister found me. She immediately called 911 and rushed me to the hospital and there they diagnosed me." She paused, "when Lori comes out, I don't remember what goes on. I have no recollection of things that happened, so if something did happen, I'm sorry."
And then she said something that broke his heart. She looked up, a few tears fell and she whispered her words, "and that is why my parents... hate me."
"I don't think-" He stopped himself from continuing, because he honestly had no idea what the truth was about her parents. And then Ross shook his head, "no worries, nothing really happened." She nodded. "I'm sorry all of that happened to you, I can't imagine what that's like. I really am truly sorry, you don't deserve that." She nodded again, "and just so you know it's the same kinda with my episodes, I don't remember anything that goes on during them and I had a major one with just Rydel. She later told me what happened and I try to prevent it from happening again."
"That's really good." Laura sighed, "I wish I had that support."
"You do." Ross told her, "from me, from your sister, my family. I know your parents aren't involved as much, but you still have us and Calum and Raini if you tell them what's going on. Nobody's here to judge you, we're only here to help you, okay?" He said and she nodded.
"Okay." She whispered and then she did something he hadn't expected. She threw herself on him, laying her body completely on top of him and looked down. She let go of his hand and put both her hands on his cheeks. "Do you ever think someone could fall for a crazy girl like me?"
"Do you think a girl could fall for a crazy guy like me?" He shot back and they just stared at each other in silence after that. Her eyes searched his and his searched hers.
"I think it could happen… someday." She answered back.
He wrapped his arms around her, "me too." He whispered and then she went for it and made the first move. Her lips crashed onto his in a soft and gentle kiss. He kissed her back, slowly and gently, his hands moving to her hair as their lips moved against the other's as they slowly broke apart the intimate kiss. They then stared at each other for a few seconds.
"That was my first kiss," She admitted, "and it was exactly the kind of first kiss I always imagined it would be. Maybe even better."
He smiled, "I'm glad I could be your first kiss."
He then kissed her again and she smiled against his lips, pressing her lips against his more firmly and then they broke it.
"I like you." She said. She tilted her head, "I like you a lot."
"I like you too." He smiled back.
She giggled and then closed her eyes, her head lying on his chest. "Don't make me move, I'm so comfortable."
He nodded, "don't worry, I'm not letting you go anywhere." He assured her.
And for the first time ever, she didn't doubt it wasn't true.
She was sent away a week later.
They had had a pretty good week, or so he thought. She was happy again and smiling and they were holding hands and kissing every now and then. It made his family happy. It made him happy and most importantly, it had made her happy. He really thought things were changing and that she was going to be okay.
But he'd been wrong.
Since he didn't have a phone, he had no prior knowledge of her episodes or that her parents had sent her away.
She had told him once that was one of her biggest fears, being sent away. But it had happened.
He had shown up to work only to find out that he was allowed to leave just as soon as he'd gotten there. Kevin had explained that they were going to be on a temporary hiatus and when he asked why he said he couldn't say anything, that it was confidential.
Once he realized that Laura wasn't there, it all started to click.
The phone call that he'd gotten from her sister at home, also helped a bit too.
His mother had been the one to find him in the kitchen when he found out and immediately he fell against her, crying as she held him close and whispered reassuring things into his ear. Some of which he didn't even want to hear.
After that he told her everything Laura had told him and she had understood why he'd been so upset and had said pretty much the same thing Rydel said. She needed to take care of herself and it wasn't something she was currently trying real hard on doing.
And it broke him.
It's hard to lose someone you like, but even harder to lose someone you love.
That was something he learned in the month that followed Laura's disappearance. He had watched Romeo & Juliet for the millionth time and though it wasn't a true story, he realized that losing someone you were in love with was most likely much, much worse.
Since the show was on hiatus, he had more time to work with the band and even wrote a few songs, which of course everyone loved.
But he noticed something during those rehearsals and songwriting sessions.
Rydel kept looking at Ellington like he was the one she lost. Like she was in love with him and she had lost him for good. Though it wasn't exactly the same situation, it was still more or less the same kind of heartbreak.
And that was the exact moment when he really started to wonder if he was falling for Laura.
It had been three more months that had passed by.
Four months in total full of band rehearsals, shows and lots of songwriting sessions.
He got the call from Heath to come in to work that following Monday.
Rydel drove him to set and he sat in the front seat, anxiously awaiting to see if it was finally the day he'd be working on the show again. Truth be told, he missed it. Austin was his escape from reality and he really needed him more than ever lately.
Rydel parked the car and then they both walked onto the lot together. Just before they opened the door, she had hugged him and given him a reassuring smile. He had returned it and with that, they walked in.
A crew member had taken him away from her, telling him he needed to go into the make-up room immediately. He thought it was strange, but went with it.
The crew member left him by himself and he opened the door. It was completely empty except for one person. The door shut behind him and the person turned around, she noticed him and then the anxiety she felt and the anxiety he felt immediately disappeared.
She looked behind her at the brushes and the make-up and he understood without words what she wanted. It was something he did around when they had met just a few months before.
She sat down in one of the chairs and he picked up one of the powders of blush and a brush. He tried to remember what he watched Rydel and his mother do and approached her.
"Hi," He said, smiling at her, "I'm Ross and I'll be doing your make-up today."
She softly giggled and smiled back, she held her hand out, "Hi, Ross." She grabbed his hand in hers and shook it, then she laced their fingers and held his hand tightly in hers. "I'm Laura."
He smiled bigger and then as he started to (attempt) to do her makeup, he realized at that moment that things would be okay. That he'd be okay, that she would be okay and that eventually, they both would be okay.
It was going to be the legacy they would both leave behind.
So yeah, there it is. So many unanswered questions (at least I feel like there is), but at the same time, I love how I ended it and how I wrote the story in general. And yes, I did do research on the disorders. I, myself, am bipolar, so I know about it very well.
I listened to the song Let Her Go by Passenger and it kinda set the tone for it. So, give it a listen when you read, or not, up to you.
I really hope you liked it. I don't think I've ever written Laura like this before, so it was interesting for me to try it out.
Oh and if anyone's wondering, I forgot to put Riker in this and I got asked this by somebody once before, but the reason why I always have Rydel and Ross have the most sibling bonding moments is because of the concert I went to last November in LA. Ross seemed a bit sad that night and Rydel constantly was checking on him, both subtly and not so subtly and making sure he was okay. Also the fact that they shared a room when he was first born is like the cutest thing I've ever heard so yeah that's another reason why. I don't think they're closer to each other than anybody else, I just really believe they have a special kind of bond that they don't share with anybody else. But that could just be me.
Okay, I'm gonna go work on the other stories now. This was number seven of the hidden stories in my computer, for the record.
Much love xx