I knew I wanted to tell him today.
I couldn't take it anymore. I'd been avoiding my friends I grew up with. People that understand me more sometimes than I understand my self. But now there was a huge gap between us. This secret was driving me into a hole. I felt disgusting and wrong. I felt sleazy and if I didn't admit to it, I knew I'd feel this way forever. Perhaps maybe we'd still be friends...maybe he'd understand you know?
My name is X Cain.
I'm in love with my best friend Zero.
Ever since the hormones started kicking in and the porn videos were being watched, I never looked at the girls like Zero and Axl did. I was looking at somewhere else. I was looking at him. It'd always drive me crazy every time Axl got the so called great idea to circle jerk. It killed me. Every time Zero stayed the night and I'd wake back up and see him sleep. It killed me. Every time I saw Zero open the door in his boxers, it killed me. Every time he'd get too close, it killed me. He was perfect. It had escalated. The older I got, the more I knew the more I knew what these feelings were. Deep inside of me I accepted it. But I was so afraid and so scared. This separated me from my friends.
"X why don't you chill stay the night, Axl's coming too?" Zero would ask. I'd shake my head.
"No I think I'd better go home, I have to study." I'd respond.
I'd refuse any invitation that got me a little too close.
This had been going on for about a month or two and I honestly just couldn't take it.
I dreamed about him.
I touched myself to him.
Hell I'd even smell a shirt or sweaters that he'd leave over my house sometimes.
I really wanted him.
I told myself it wasn't normal. Anyone but him. But I just didn't want anyone else.
I knew he'd never love me back. We'd probably end our friendship.
Then I'd loose two things, my heart and a best friend.
Axl, Zero and I had always been close.
It had always been us three against the world.
Part of me wanted to believe that if I told him, he wouldn't care, that he'd just accept it and nothing would change. This is what I was hoping for.
So here I am, middle of the night in front of Zero's door. I can see his dad's not home from the driveway. I ring the doorbell a few times.
I hear footsteps and suddenly my whole body tried to leave, Zero opened up the door.
"Bruh what're you doing X?" Zero asked.
"Ah nothing...I think I should go home." I said trying to walk away. Zero grabbed my jacket and dragged me into the house and locked the door in one swift motion. I was flustered and jumpy.
"Aye, come in the living room X." Zero said going back in the living room.
I got up and walked in, he was on the couch watching Samurai Jack, drinking a whole jug of Arizona.
I sat down on the couch across from him.
"Is something wrong at home? I'll beat Dr. Cain down." Zero said without looking from the tv.
"No I need to talk to you about something important." I said gathering all the courage I had.
"Like what? Did Axl get hit by a car or something?" Zero asked.
"No..." I answered.
"Your face says that you think this is some sort of crisis. Your eyes tell me that you're nervous. Just tell me." Zero said pausing Samurai Jack and gaining eye contact with me.
"I don't think I can." I answered truthfully.
"Why not...?" Zero said he got up and sat down next to me.
"Well...I'm scared...to be honest." I admitted outloud letting some of it come out.
"You don't have to be, serious, it's me we're talking about." Zero said embracing me. I was really flustered and my vision began to blur, i knew I was having a panic attack. I lightly shoved Zero, in desperation to regain my ground. He looked at me in concern.
There was silence for a time but finally I spoke.
"I like you a lot Zero...like not in a way that's normal and I need to tell you this because I feel guilty and wrong, I think about you all the time and I ...I..."
"Oh shit." Zero said completely surprised.
"Hah...yeah." I looked down. I felt like I was about to cry.
"X I meaaaaaan if you're into me you coulda said something before though." Zero said with a grin/laugh. Not the reaction I was expecting. I looked back up at him.
"I mean I am kinda messing around with Iris right now...but I think I might break up with her for no apparent reason tomorrow." Zero said still grinning.
I was speechless.
"I meaaaaaan...if you wanna fuck around and stay the night and show me what thatmouth does that's cool." Zero said still with the same grin.
"Wait what." I said to the room.
"I think about you all the time too... I'm pretty sure I'm Bi for you...or whatever the fuck is the right term. Buuuut I thought you'd get weirded out and not be cool with me so I just kinda ignored it, thinking you'd get a ugly haircut one day and it'd just be a faze.
"Wait so..." I started laughing, Zero did too.
"So that's why you won't hang out with me as much? Cause I make you hot and bothered?" Zero said getting closer to me, my whole body ached with a want. All of sudden the guilt was gone I felt comfortable and I spoke.
"Yeah." I said simply.
We shared our first kiss. It was better than anything I'd ever had or ever imagined. Zero tasted like Arizona tea. We parted.
"I'm like super happy right now, fuck. I thought you were going to call me a faggot and stop talking to me." I said leaning onto Zero.
"Nah you're a faggot,But we're just gonna be faggots together." Zero said putting his arm around me.
"So we gone tell Axl?"I asked.
"Hmmmmm hell naw." Zero said with a laugh.
Ever since then we've been together.
The end.
MOMMA CALLED ME ON THE PHONE ASKED ME IF I'M STILL WRITING. I SAID NO MA'AM.
So I started up again.
So I wrote this but we straight as fuck. But I didn't ever write one of these for X and Zero, I guess this kinda sorta goes with working for the weekend. Or maybe not, maybe with all of the X and Zero stories that are just regular people...idk.
But I'm back y'all I'll be doing some of the requests I got recently. Then I'll start on a new story in a bit.
- Yo frog also known as that hype nigga yung duck.