The following is a collection of some of the earlier pieces of fan fiction I've written, from my first at age ten to my most current at age fourteen. This project is NOT an MST, parody, or any other such story (although some of each are included in my past works).
The reason? I was just sorting through these and got a laugh out of how horrible they were. So, I thought you folks and my friends might too. Yeah, yeah, you can find bad fanfiction anywhere on this site, but isn't it better to laugh WITH a bad author than AT them? No? Oh well. Its secondary function is as a sort of archive for me. The first three stories I found were actually in hard copy form, their original Word documents having been deleted. Also if I actually write anything good, I can look back and see how far I've come. Something corny like that.
The following works of fan fiction have been left just as they were, except for a few minor formatting changes and, in a few rare instances, removal of questionable content (indicated by brackets). Yes, this means all the original grammatical and spelling errors have been left untouched. I apologize if the categorization of this collection seems inappropriate, as you'll find that some of the stories in this collection are NOT crossovers. The majority are, though, so I figured that would be the best category to put this in.
Just covering my behind: I haven't written a fanfic since I was 14. I am much older than that now.
Did I mention that this stuff is bad?
A look at the current and future content:
1 - Introduction and The Sailor Scouts go to Hyrule
2 - Lita Kino Writes Again
3 - Intoduction to the Universe
4 - Not My Problem
5 - Average-Part 3
6 - The Power of My Inner Spirit
This list is actually a bit lacking, if you can believe that. This is because most of my old works (for example, the other 4 parts of "Average" and my collection of bad MSTs) were either corrupted or very smartly deleted years ago so I wouldn't be able to embarrass myself with them later. I was pretty good at predicting these things, once.
1 - I know how bad these works are. You can LAUGH at how bad these are, but I don't need you to actually criticize them, constructively or not. I know there's blatantly wrong information in these fics, but I'm not gonna change 'em.
2 - Please don't tell me that these works are good. They aren't. If you do, I'll cry for you.
3 - No, you may not MiST/MST/Mystery Science Theater these. I've done those before, too. Trust me, you're not NEARLY as hilarious as you think you are.
Latest Update - 6/24/05 - Well, it's over, unless I happen to dig up something else, which I doubt. The last story has been formatted and posted. Thanks for reading, you masochists.
ON TO THE FIRST STORY!
By: Young Feldinaut, age 10
Chapter 1
I remember the day I woke up in another world. It seems like yesterday. Maybe it was just yesterday. It's so confusing. I remember it all...
My name is Lita Kino. This is the story of how I got to the Sacred Realm.
I was walking along with my five friends. I believe we were heading towards the mall. It seemed like a normal day, but it turned out to be the weirdest day of my life, maybe even weirder than the time I was brought back to life, but that's another story. So anyway, we were walking along and Ami happened to look at the sky.
"Look up there!" she said, so we did. That's when we saw it. We saw a dark figure on a horse, in the sky!
"It must be something from the Negaverse!" Luna (Serena's cat) replied. I honestly didn't think so. Mina must have thought the same.
" Maybe, but they've never sent out anything like that before!" she gaped.
"Maybe so, Mina" answered Luna. "Maybe so."
Just then the dark figure saw us staring at him. He swooped down on us. Luckily, he was far enough away that we had time to transform. I made the first attack, my Thunderclap Zap, but he ricochet it back at me! That's when I got knocked out. I heard later that everyone's moves ended up coming back at the, except for Sailor Moon (her's hit him but didn't effect him).
The next thing I knew I was inside a pink chamber. My friends were with me, but were still knocked out. I turned around and saw a shadowy figure playing an organ that was in a corner of the room.
"That must be that guy! I thought. "You won't get away with this, freak!"
The man turned around and looked at me as if I was a mere fly. He had an olive complexion, was very tall, and had weird clothes. I looked up to his face. It was the ugliest thing I've ever seen! He had a huge nose and even bigger ears. His orange hair framed his face.
"Yeah I'm talkin' to you, big nose!" I hollered. "I'll take you on!"
He started slowly walking towards me.
"That's right, Dumbo! Get over here so I can..." I stopped. For the first time since my parents died I felt terrified. My hands started to tremble. I couldn't move even if I tried.
The man raised his left hand. A green ball started to form in it.
"No one calls the King of Hyrule a 'Dumbo'!" he yelled as the ball got larger.
I had a big lump in my throat but managed to say, "Hey, you're not gonna throw that at me are you?"
He just smiled an evil smile, and he got ready to throw the ball.
"Lita, wake up! You were having a bad dream!" said a familiar voice. It was my mom. I was in my bed, but not the one in my apartment. I looked down at myself. I was wearing my favorite pajamas, from when I was four years old!
"Where am I? I have to know!" I demanded.
"Your at home, honey" my so-called ad said.
I knew something was wrong. My dad never called me honey! I looked around the room. My pink flowered wallpaper suddenly turned into "evil-clown" wallpaper! I hated clowns when I was four! I then looked at my parents, just as they were morphing into monsters!
"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!" I screamed.
"Sailor Jupiter, wake up! You were having a bad dream!" said a familiar voice.
"No way! I'm not falling for that again!" I claimed. I then decked Raye. Oops.
"Hey! What did you do that for!" she screamed. She decked me back.
We fought until Ami said, "Stop it you guys! There's someone else in here, remember?"
"You just noticed?" I asked thinking of the shadowy guy with the big ears.
"Like you would know" Raye snapped. "She came in here while you were knocked out, stupid."
"Why you little...who are you?" I asked as I turned around to see a beautiful woman.
"I am Zelda, Princess of Hyrule," the stranger replied. "Who are you, all of you?"
"We are the Sailor Scouts, champions of justice! United we are invincible, and we will punish you!" we all said at once.
"Well, we won't punish you," added Serena. "We're just used to saying that part."
I also added, "But we'll punish that guy with the big ears and nose!"
"I'm afraid you can't stop that evil man, Ganondorf. There is only one person who can. His name is Link, the Hero of Time," Zelda said.
"And how long is that gonna take?" I asked.
"Don't be disrespectful!" cut in Ami, obviously irritated with me.
"Don't worry about it," said Zelda. "He should be here very..."
Just then, the door opened and a man wearing a green tunic and a strange hat walked in. Man was he hunky! He spotted Zelda and walked over to her. "Zelda," he said. "Where is Ganondorf?"
I eyed a dark figure coming up the stairs out the door. I trembled in fear and just pointed.
The man, who was named Link, must have noticed too because he took out a humongous sword.
By this time Ganondorf had already come up the stairs. I noticed he didn't have a sword.
"Oh man! I thought. "Link's gonna get killed before he even has a chance! I was wrong.
It turned out that Link had some of his own magic up his sleeves. One was called Din's Fire or something like that.
Well anyway, Link defeated Ganondorf, but just as he was about to die, he performed one last spell that tore the whole castle down. We all escaped before we could get hurt, though.
When we got outside, we thought it was all over. We were terribly wrong.
There, towering above us stood the huge, powerful, and really ugly monster: Ganon. I stood there gaping for a while like my friends until the monster grabbed Mina, looking like he was going to eat her.
I was really mad by this time. I wasn't going to let this big galoot eat one of my friends. I ran towards it and used my Thunder Dragon on it.
"Take that you big bully! Go pick on someone your own size!" I said as it let go of Mina, out of shock.
Mina plunged downward screaming, but we all caught her. "Thanks Sailor Jupiter. You're a real pal," she said.
"Nothing to it," I replied.
Well, the rest of the time we watched the battle. Link won, of course. We expected to be taken home right away, but Link said we had to go to this place called the Temple of Time. So we followed him there.
When we got there, he took us to a room with a block of stone in the middle. "Now, each of you stand on a medallion, those circles on the floor," he said. We did.
When we were all standing on one, including Link, with Zelda in the middle, these strange looking six people appeared. I'll describe how they looked:
1.She looked like a little girl with green hair.
2.He looked like a strong stone statue hat talks.
3.She looked like something off "The Little Mermaid."
4.She looked like Xena, warrior Princess.
5.She looked like a female Ganondorf.
Anyway, they all circled around us and said something that sounded to me like: "We eat six sausages." Ami claims they were saying, "We are the six sages," and Rae thinks they said, "Eat at Joe's, they have good pancakes." Oh, well. The point is we got home and lived happily ever after. Not!
It was just a few days after our experience in Hyrule that my friends and I were standing outside the burger place sipping on some milkshakes.
Just then, Ami pointed to the sky and said, "Look!"
We all looked up to see something that looked like a giant metal peach flying over us!
Then, some guy with blue hair in the shape of a pineapple and a little fat guy came up and urged, "Come with us! We have to save Odeo Castle!"
But then again, that's another story