I sat down on the toilet seat, with the pregnancy test in hand waiting for the test to come through. My knees were trembling. God, how much I hate these toilets. You know the one that are enclosed within a plastic box? I can't remember what they're called. The thought of me being pregnant is overtaking my mind. Mum and dad can't deal with another child that has gone down low in life. Lauren is currently overcoming her addiction to alcohol. I feel so anxious. I can't have this baby. Jay might want it but I can't! I have to make my family proud. I failed my exams because of Lauren even though she's paying for me to let me retake the exams. My dream has always been to become a vet. I need good grades to go to university, get my degree, and then become a vet. How am I supposed to do that with a baby in tow?

I sigh. I feel bad. I know how much I've hurt him by saying if I'm pregnant then I'm aborting it. He's had a rough life with the passing of both of his parents and his grandmother; I guess he wants to do something good in his life to make them proud, I guess.

I do love Jay, very dearly and me and him both know that we have a future together. Deep down, we're not ready to have a baby. We need a stable career before we even consider having a family. He's a mechanic, which is nothing special. He doesn't earn that greater salary. I'm not surprised-he's coming up for 19!

I check my watch. It's gone 5 minutes.

I take a deep breath before looking down at the pregnancy test. There it was, written in bold: Pregnant.

It says that I'm 2 weeks gone. I sigh; it must have been the night I found out that I failed my exams. I was stressed, upset and I went over to Jay's and he comforted me by making love. He didn't force me; I wanted to do it just as much as he did. I found it soothing if I'm honest. We found that session tenser than any other time we did it, even tenser than Valentine's Night.

Tears started to fill my eyes. How could I be that stupid? I tried not to cry but I did. Luckily, I was silent. I'm so scared. I can't have this baby. I need a life.

Five minutes later, I jumped suddenly as I heard a knocking on the cubicle door.

"Abs," a familiar voice spoke, "Everything okay babe?"

"I'm coming," I snapped.

I didn't mean to snap, it's not his fault. I could tell in his voice that he's scared just as much as I am. This is a big thing. A thing we're not ready for.

Quickly, I wiped away the tears that were dampening my cheeks and rose to my feet. I took a deep breath, the positive pregnancy test in hand and unlocked the door, scrambling out of it. Jay was standing there. He was standing a few steps away. I stormed over to him, keeping a grim and straight line drawn on my face as I handed him the test. He just stared at it, holding it in both hands.

"Congratulations," I snapped and walked away from him with thoughts running through my head. I could feel Jay's eyes lingering on me, his beautiful green eyes.

I arrived back at the caravan. I had to act normal, act like nothing's up, act like there's no baby beginning to develop inside me. Well it's not going to be developing as I'm having an abortion. That's final.

"Lost your boyfriend?" Cindy teased.

Cindy -Peter and Lucy's half-sister, absolute pain! She was never meant to come on this holiday; she hid in the boot through the whole journey!

I just glared at her, not even bothering to answer back and just entered the caravan. Lola and Peter were chilling out on the sofa, just chilling out. They were laughing, all bubbly and merry. I wish I was in their shoes. I wish I never got pregnant and I could just enjoy this holiday. Just me, my hot boyfriend and my friends- I can't even have that can I? Cos I'm just Abi Branning and Brannings? They NEVER really get a happy ending.

"Peter's cooking his famous Macaroni Cheese tonight Abs," Lola announced, looking up at me with a wide smile on her face.

I love Macaroni Cheese. However, I suddenly feel sick just by the thought of it. See! I can't even enjoy a Macaroni Cheese on what's supposed to be a fun holiday. Screw you pregnancy, screw you!

Why? Why me? Why did I have to get myself pregnant? I mean, out of any of us, it would likely be Lauren! She's the one that's the troublesome teenager. Not me. I'm the good girl who is supposed to go far in life. And I still will because I'm not having this baby. I don't want a baby, not yet. I want to have a baby that was known that it was loved and wanted ever since I found out that I was expecting.

"I don't fancy anything today," I lied. I was starving. I couldn't say I dislike Macaroni Cheese then they would get suspicious. I don't want anyone to find out about the baby, not even my family. I just want to have an abortion, with or without Jay by my side as soon as I get back off holiday and have no one find out, not ever! That's what I want.

"Oh, what a shame," Peter responded, with a frown.

"Sorry Peter," I smiled sympathetically at him.

Dexter suddenly burst through the front door with a bright smile on his face, full of energy. All these happy faces and I haven't got one. He went on a date with Kitty. This girl we met at the local pub.

"How did it go bruv?" Peter asked. Both Peter and Lola were dying to hear about the date.

"Awesome dude," Dexter smiled. I've never seen him this happy before, well I don't think so.

Just at that moment, Jay came back. I turned round and me and Jay just stared at each other, not knowing what to say. I turned back to Lola, "I'm going for a lie down."

With that, I walked through the kitchen and across the hallway, entering mine and Jay's room. We had the main bedroom. It might have been because that Jay and I are the only couple here so we have the room as it has a double bed. I think it would seem odd if Jay and I went on holiday together, yet we weren't allowed to sleep together.

I lay down on our bed and closed my eyes for a few seconds before Jay walked in, closing the door behind him.

"I know you're upset," he said softly.

I opened my eyes, "Well done Dumbo!"

I grabbed one of the small cushions on our bed and threw it at him, which he caught. He was a good catcher. He caught my heart and he still has it.

He smirked as he put the cushion down on the bed and sat beside my legs. He sighed.

"I know you're scared Abs and so am I."

I sighed, "Jay, I'm really sorry. I really really am; I just can't have this baby. You have to understand. I have dreams to follow; I want to live them first. I can't do that with this baby in tow."

He sighed heavily, putting his head in his hands before looking at me. His eyes looked dark and narrow. "Yeah and what about what I want, eh?!"

"I'm sorry Jay; we can have another baby in the future. Me getting pregnant wasn't meant to happen; we have everything to live for first."

"Well it's happened Abi so obviously this is meant to be!"

"But it's not!"

"How do you know that? You may be clever sweetheart but you're not a fortune teller!"

"I have a life, Jay! I want to live it!"

"And you won't let our baby live?! You hate it when humans kill animals yet you are quite happy to kill a baby?!"

"It's not a baby; it's just a few cells. A foetus, in fact; it's not a baby yet and it never will be a baby!"

"It's still a living thing Abs! How can you be so selfish?"

"Excuse me?! I think you'll find that it's my body, Jay. I can do what I want!"

"Yeah, well I'll think you'll find that it's not just your baby, it's mine too! So stop thinking about your fucking self and think about me!"

With that, Jay rose to his feet and stormed out the room, slamming the door behind him. I sighed and closed my eyes. I could hear the others ask Jay: "What's wrong?" or "What's happened?" or "Is everything okay?"

However, I didn't hear him reply to any of them. I just heard the front door…shut.