Elochai

When I was trying to write this the first time, the file got corrupted for some reason. So not the original, but close enough.

Warnings: Angst, self-mutilation, character death, violence, drug use, smoking, rape, blood

Disclaimer: I don't own Final Fantasy VIII or any of its characters

Chapter 1: Welcome to Hell

Those hands. They were larger than the average man's. They were scarred and cut, burned and overall put through hell. The skin was cracked in many pieces, dry and falling off like little snowflakes onto the linoleum flooring. Dirt made a home in the cracks and seemed to have a permanent residence in them. The fingernails were chewed for years and years, and it was obvious they were. The nails seemed shorter than what they should be; it seemed as if they weren't even there. Dirt also clumped together under the short nails as calcium build-up caused large white spots on top.

They were the same hands that had hurt me a million times before and a million times into the future. They were the hands that picked my small frame up from the ground and slammed me to the wall. I could see the muscles working under tanned skin, flexing and straining to do the work asked of them by their master. The skin was just as scarred as the hands were, perhaps even worse. The scars didn't tan very well and were like specks of white against a black background. Needlemarks lined up by the elbows like a bunch of soldiers walking down a street. They were the arms of a drug addict.

I suddenly sound myself flung to the floor by those same hands and arms. A heavy body found its way on top of mine, effectively pinning me to the floor, back touching the cold linoleum. My chest heaved as I saw a shiny metal object glint in his hand. His free hand pinned my head to the ground and I didn't dare try to escape. As I felt the knife penetrate its way into my skin, bursting my blood vessels, waves of pain ran through my body. I didn't listen to the man's words...

The grey brick walls of the old mansion were worn down to the eye, but this was a mere optical illusion. The brick walls from ancient times seemed to be in a better condition than the siding of the buildings and houses on the other side of the city. The roof was newly rebuilt; no leaks would be found for some long period of time. Gothic windows in perfect allignment allowed the passerby to see inside until blinds were pulled down or curtains pulled shut. However, there were no curtains or blinds.

The yard's dark green grass was even more healthy than that of the wealthy neighbors. It almost seemed to glow in the morning sunlight. Newly formed dew fell off of the lithe blades to be absorbed by the ground. A small path of sand seperates parts of the yard from sidewalk to the large door. The path of sand seemed to be outline by many colorful little flowers of all sorts of shapes and sizes leading up to the ivy growing up the mansion's side. Hedges, six feet tall, surrounded the yard as if to protect it from the world's numerous dangers. The old mansion striked feelings of nervousness and fear to the young woman approaching it.

Her raven black hair glimmered and shimmered in the sunlight. Brown highlights were easily seen, unlike her bangs. The hair had an appearance of recently groomed kitten - clean and soft. It had been taken care of wonderfully by the best hair products on the market.

She carried herself with pride, something that many women in the city never did, having been reduced to prostitutes to pay the bills. Her exposed tanned skin seemed to glow in the sunlight. Only a light blue tubetop and a denim miniskirt with black flipflops prevented some skin from being exposed, though that was only a small amount of skin not able to be exposed. A thin chain hung from her neck with a ring dangling from it. She was the image of beauty and grace.

Her brown eyes didn't shine with any sort of fear or nervousness that was being felt. They seemed to glow with excitement and sadness at the same time, as if she had left something precious behind. As she began to walk on the sand path, she gasped at the sheer beauty of the mansion. She gasped once more as she swung its mighty doors open and peered inside.

Inside of the mansion in the entrance hallway lay several cardboard boxes. As she walked inside and to the next room, she saw that the cardboard boxes were organized into their respective rooms. She smiled. Her pink lips pulled back but didn't expose her teeth. At that moment, one would expect her to be an angel. She walked back to the entrance of the old mansion and closed the mighty door.

"Well, I might as well begin unpacking."

She was done with the action several hours later. Exhausted, she dropped the remaining cardboard boxes by the door she had entered earlier. From the window, she saw that the sun was setting and it was getting dark. For a city view, it was beautiful. She had seen much better ones in the countryside where she had once lived, and the view she saw now couldn't even begin to compare to the ones she was used to seeing.

She began to walk down the large hallway again, feeling slightly saddened. She had left everything she loved in the countryside, but she struggled to find something positive. Although the air wasn't as clean as she was used to or the sunsets as pretty, the city of Balamb was a charming place. It was much, much larger than she had expected, but she had heard the school was very large as well. She began to feel excited and nervous as she thought about the school she was supposed to be going to tomorrow.

It was a school with high standards, but the students were mostly happy. There was no official dress code or need for uniforms due to the principal of Balamb High believing that dress codes only limited creativity in young people. The students scored academically well with a maximum of two study halls allowed per day. The students also scored well in physical education, as the school placed much emphasis on it. Instead of being graded on how well you play, you were graded on spirit. For the most part, females had physical education in the mornings while the males had it in the afternoon, but of course, there were some exceptions to the unofficial rule.

As she was about ready to check the clock, her stomach growled. She had skipped lunch to finish unpacking, though she did not unpack her father's possessions. She had seen some of them before, and she didn't want to see them again. As far as she was concerned, he could unpack his own things. She walked to the kitchen with a fast pace, intent on both finding out the time and getting some food.

The kitchen was a nice and neat place, covered with linoleum flooring. Though the kitchen's primary color was white, a nice blue was also mixed in here and there. She observed the clock she had hung on the wall earlier in the day and wasn't very surprised to learn that it was nearing six in the evening. Walking over to the cabinets, she searched through them for a bowl and fork. There were many large cabinets, but eventually she found them. Luckily, along the way, she also found what she was craving - macoroni and cheese.

It wasn't the best macoroni and cheese you could buy, but she wasn't picky enough to buy the most expensive package on the market. It satisfied her whenever she could make it right. She poured two cups of water into the small bowl and opened the package of macoroni, pouring it in carefully as to not splash herself with the cold water. She put the bowl into the new microwave and waited as the macoroni cooked. When the microwave beeped, she retrieved the bowl and poured the cheese mix into it, stirring the mixture with a fork. As she waited for the cheese to thicken (as she always put too much water in), she brought the bowl with her to the closest living room.

The living rooms held very expensive objects within their walls, but thanks to the excellent security that had been installed in the mansion before her arrival, she didn't have to worry about the objects being stolen. She sat on the plush and comfortable couch, one of the most expensive ones money could buy. Putting the bowl on the glass-top coffee table, she grabbed the remote and turned on the television. She used the remote to change the HDTV to channel 16, the local news station. She was glad to have read what numbers her new local channels were. She just couldn't go a night without watching the news.

The cheese had thickened and she began eating. It was probably the best macoroni and cheese she had made in her life, she thought. She wasn't very skilled at cooking, but she got better everyday due to always having to make meals for herself. Her father was never home, but he was very skilled at cooking. Sometimes she wished that cooking skills were inheritable.

The main reason why she watched the news appeared - the weather. It was nearing the end of summer, as it was August, but the temperatures were still warm and comfortable. She smiled again as she read the forecast on the screen, for the next day was supposed to be warm and sunny. She had always hated having a rainy day on the first day of school. It almost saddened her to think that this was her last first day of school, as she was a senior and would be graduating next June. Sometimes she felt like she had already graduated, as she essentially lived alone anyway except for the holidays, when her father sometimes came home.

Satisifed with her cooking, she put the bowl and fork in the dishwasher. She only turned on the dishwasher when it was full - she had plenty of dishes even when the dishwasher was full. Sometimes, she was glad she came from a rich family. She had many luxuries but never took them for granted, as she knew one day she might lose them all. Turning the lights off in the kitchen, she headed upstairs to her bedroom.

The alarm clock began buzzing in her ear, and instantly she knew that it was 6:30 in the morning. She had always woken up at that time during the school year, save for weekends. Though she lived even closer to the school now, she didn't feel the need to break twelve year tradition. Balamb High opened its doors to students at nine in the morning and classes started half an hour later. She gently turned off the alarm clock, rubbing her eyes with her other hand. She got out of bed slowly, stretching. She threw on the sheets and put the pillow in the case, the same thing she did everyday. She never made her bed neatly, except when company was over. There was just no use for it, as she was going to remove the covers again so she could sleep later that night.

She's a little tired, though. She had been woken up during the night by a ringing phone. There was no one there but a voice. It breathed in and out, slowly and deeply. Frightened, she hung up the phone. She hates to be alone at night though she has been since she was a young kid. Luckily, she has managed to brush off the late night phone call somewhat easily, as it was something immature teenagers did in an attempt to scare people. She was used to that sort of thing, having come from the countryside where there was nothing to do but prank call others.

After getting a shower and doing her hair, it was already eight in the morning. She had no idea as to why some people take so long with their hair. She actually spent more time in the shower than doing her hair, which many girls from Timber, her home, thought was odd. She was already walking around with her normal outfit on, her light blue tubetop and denim miniskirt with her black flipflops sitting by the door. She had already packed her bookbag full of school supplies for the day ahead. The said object was sitting by her black flipflops so she wouldn't forget it.

She had walked to the kitchen and poured herself a bowl of Cinnamon Toast Crunch. It was hard picking out which cereal to have, though, as she had many different kinds from Life to Trix to Captain Crunch's Crunchberries; all were her favorites. She wasn't a picky eater in the least. She now sat on the couch, watching the news. She arrived early enough to see the ending of a special on Balamb High. She felt nervous, going to a school with such high standards. She was first in her class in Timber High, but she wasn't so sure she was going to hold the same position here. After watching "Good Morning America", she saw that it was 8:50. It was time for her to head to Balamb High. Putting her bowl in the dishwasher next to last night's bowl, she hustled to the door, slipped on her flipflops and black mesh backpack and left, locking the door behind her.

She arrived as a warning bell rang, telling her that it was nine in the morning. It took about ten minutes to walk to school, short compared to the 20 minute walk it took to get to Timber High from her old residence. She and many other students hurried to the door, intent on getting in to talk to old friends or grab a snack in the cafeteria. Some would head to the library to sit in the air conditioned room, or as others would say, read.

She was too busy wrapped up in her own thoughts and bumped into something hard in front of her. She looked up, shaken from her thoughts, and blushed. He was gorgeous.

His brown hair appeared silky and well-kept though the different lengths of front and back. Though his hair hangs down to his ears and the back goes slightly past them, his bangs were his longest sections of hair, some strands having to be tucked behind his ears. Though wearing a black leather jacket with a cross between a lion and cross printed on the back of it in red and tight leather pants with combat boots and leather gloves, he didn't seem to be hot at all. Underneath of the jacket was a pure white wifebeater and that same symbol on a thick chain that dangled around his neck. A scar crossed over the bridge of his nose, but that did nothing to detract from his beauty. In her eyes, he was the hottest guy she had ever saw.

"Sorry about that," she said, surprised she got her voice to work. He looked at her with stormy blue-gray eyes, taking in her appearance. Not even five seconds later, he grunted and walked away. She stood there, dumbfounded and blushing. She couldn't comprehend why he would walk away from her without saying a word. She knew she dressed like a prep, but surely he wouldn't be the kind of guy to judge her by appearance, or so she believed. She sighed before following the students into the large school.

As she entered, she was taken by surprise at the whole beauty of the place. It was very clean and white, but not overly so. The lights had newly changed bulbs and shone brightly upon the hundreds of students in the hallways. She nearly gasped when she realized something - she had yet to recieve her schedule. Looking around, she saw a sign that said "office". Assuming that was what she was looking for, she pushed her way through the crowd and entered the small enclosure.

It was a welcome change from the crowd outside. She liked being with people, but she was overwhelmed in the hallway. A middle aged lady with her graying hair in a bun and wearing formal clothes looked at her strangely.
"Excuse me, but I'm new here and I need a schedule."
The lady smiled, understanding. "Your name, please?" she asked in a pleasant voice.

"Rinoa Heartilly," Rinoa replied, smiling back.
"Ah, Rinoa..." the woman said, looking through the schedules, "You were first in your class at Timber. I'm sure you'll do just fine here."
"I'm hoping so."
"You're going to have some competition, though. Squall Leonhart was first in his class since first grade. He has an almost perfect GPA, like you did at Timber."

"Oh, so what does Squall look like?"
"He wears a lot of leather. He's the only one that comes to school like that. It's a good thing we have a new air conditioning system installed, or else the poor dear would be sweating all day!" the lady chuckled. Rinoa's eyes widened slightly. The guy she had ran into...was Squall Leonhart.
"Here you go, dear," the lady said, handing Rinoa the schedule. "Selphie, can you come here?"

Rinoa blinked with confusion. Who is Selphie?

At the sound of her name, a young woman of about Rinoa's age headed towards Rinoa and the lady. Her brown hair curled upwards at the tips, most likely due to a straightening iron with curved plates. Her yellow V cut t-shirt, probably newly bought, hugged her upper body while her white miniskirt exposed her legs. "Yes, ma'am?" she asked, trying to be polite.

"Could you please show Rinoa around the school? I would like to do it, but there's so much paperwork to be done today."
"Don't sweat it," Selphie said, giggling. She turned to Rinoa, smiling sweetly. "I'm Selphie Tilmitt."

"And I'm Rinoa Heartilly," replied Rinoa, shaking the other girl's hand. She felt her nervousness begin to slowly melt away.

Rinoa had followed Selphie into the crowded hallway, trying not to lose her newfound friend.
"Okay, now that other enclosure, there," Selphie said, pointing to the other side of the hallway, "is the nurse. The nurse is a real bitch, though, so be warned."

Rinoa nodded; she had already been expecting the nurse to be unpleasant. Every school nurse she had ever had were unpleasant people, so she went to the nurse only when needed.

"Okay, now there are 8 wings in the school. Starting next to the nurse's office and going clockwise towards the office, they are physical education, foreign language, English, history, science, math, Home Ec and Industrial Arts in one wing, and the library with a large computer lab. You can borrow laptops for overnight use if you need to use a computer and don't have any. It's also the only place in school that you can listen to your iPod or CD player. Oh, and right dead center of all of the wings is the school cafeteria. You're a senior, right?"
Rinoa nodded.
"Then you'll be eating lunch at sixth period. Can I see your schedule real quick?"
Rinoa smiled and handed the hyper girl her schedule. Selphie ran her eyes over the classes and broke into a large Chesire Cat-like grin. "Hey, we have P.E. together! None of my friends have P.E. with me this year, but I have one in my class now! Sweet!"
Selphie jumped in excitement, punching the air with her fist. The other students gave her odd and strange looks and went on with their business. Rinoa smiled, relieved that she had a friend after being here for only one day.

Selphie and Rinoa headed down the hallway, gossiping about their teachers and classes. Occasionally one or the other would giggle and cover their mouth, trying not to burst out into total laughter as the teachers stared at them. Rinoa had never had this much fun in Timber. In Timber, she was pitied because she had lost her mother in a car accident. But in Balamb, she had a fresh start. No one knew who she was or what she did, or what happened to her.

"What are you two doing?" came a feminine voice with a rough edge.

Selphie giggled before answering, "Oh, just talking about queer that shirt Mr. Tucker's wearing is."

Rinoa observed the newcomer to the scene. Her blonde hair was held in a bun, save for her long bangs. They dangled freely in the air, moving whenever the air around them did. They were as free-spirited as Selphie. She only wore a black tanktop and denim jeans, but she did not in the least look like any sort of prostitute. Her make-up was kept to a minimum, giving her a semi-professional appearance to a curious onlooker. Behind of her small framed glasses, Rinoa could have sworn she saw a hint of sadness in those eyes.

"Hey Quistis, this is Rinoa," Selphie giggled. Rinoa began to believe that Selphie couldn't stop giggling, or smiling, for a minute.

There he sat, doodling on a piece of notebook paper he had obtained from a tray in the front of the room. Various shapes and lines were beginning to connect together to form a mighty lion like the emblem on the thick chain dangling from his neck. Squall sighed as he risked a glance at the clock. Time was ticking by slowly, tormenting him. He didn't want to be in school. Every second seemed to be a waste to him now. He had easily reached the top of his class without a problem; he had easily became the envy of every nerd and geek that wanted his GPA. He wasn't content in the least - he was just flat-out bored.

His mind was drifting into a void of nothingness, or so it seemed. His focus on the teacher had long since dissipated since class began all of those minutes ago. History was certainly a boring class regardless of the topic to be discussed. History had managed to make World War II about as interesting as watching paint dry. His focus had began to shift to the encounter with that woman, the encounter that had happened only a couple hours before.

When he looked at her, he felt something stir inside. His emotions that he had thought had been locked away for good had surfaced for that moment. His emotions were supposed to be locked in a cage like a feral animal, and never be allowed to escape. He had a belief - emotions are worthless. They were nothing to him; they had hurt him before. Don't people want to get away from things that cause them pain?

He had no backpack as of now. He never carried one because he never had homework. He had lunch sixth period this year, and a study hall for his eighth period class. Every student had at least one study hall on their schedule in order to lessen the stress of homework and projects. Whenever he had a test the next day, he would head to the library in the morning with his iPod and study. He had an excellent memory, and his photographic memory had lots of film. Some had even labeled him a genius, but he refused to feel flattered about the compliments.

The teacher rambled on, not even bothering to tell Squall to pay attention. The teacher knew about Squall's habits during class, as Squall was his student during his freshman year. Squall would sit around and doodle on notebook paper, having to write down only what was absolutely necessary. Squall was always listening.

The bell rang, causing the old teacher to stop mid-sentence. Squall was last to leave, having been in the very back of the class. No one dare sit in the back, afraid of Squall. Squall had never been involved in a fight or had ever received detention or suspension, but it was a common belief that Squall was extremely violent when angry.

Squall had arrived at his chemistry class rather quick, as the history and science wings were right by each other. He was first to arrive and gladly took his seat in the back of the class, nodding as the teacher greeted him. The rest of the class began to file in slowly, as if they would rather be at home relaxing. No one dared sit in the back. As the bell rang, a clumsy woman with raven black hair and chocolate eyes arrived. She muttered an apology to the teacher and began to look over the class for a seat. Only one remained - by Squall Leonhart. The class seemed to look at her in pity as she sat down by Squall.
"It's nice to see you again, Squall. Sorry we were never introduced properly. My name's Rinoa," whispered Rinoa, smiling at Squall. Squall nodded, his eyes narrowing in anger.

Rinoa smiled nervously, feeling overwhelmed by the size of the group. She was currently in the cafeteria with a lunch tray of healthy foods, as it was finally her lunch period. She took a seat to the left of Selphie, only to feel something grab her behind.

"Sorry, little lady. Just getting a wrinkle out of your skirt," said the man to her left, winking.

Grown out bangs hung freely in front, unlike the hair in the ponytail in the back. A black cowboy hat sat on top of his head. His lips were in a weird combination of a smirk and a smile, or as Selphie called it, a "smirl". His white polo shirt with the school's emblem and the black pants with black leather belt and cowboy boots caused him to look both professional and casual at the same time, as if he had been wearing those clothes for his whole life.
"Irvine!" shrieked Rinoa, causing some students to look at her strangely.
"All right, I'm sorry," muttered Irvine, who was being assaulted by the deadly glare from Selphie. "Aw, Selphie, can't I have a bit of fun?"

"Not until you're sixteen," Selphie said, still glaring.

Irvine went silent, thinking about what Selphie said. Rinoa sighed, smiling in relief, before whispering a "thank you" to Selphie.

Quistis was also there, starting up a conversation with Selphie. Irvine later joined in, but Rinoa just sat there, observing a student at the table in front of them. Squall Leonhart sat alone at lunch, though he was lacking the meal. He didn't have a bottle of water or can of soda to drink, though Rinoa was sure that he had the money to get them. For a second, Rinoa believed Squall was anorexic, but Squall wasn't that thin. He seemed to be the average build, but just didn't eat as much. Rinoa shrugged, confused, before turning her attention to the conversation about the "Trojan-mobile" going on between Selphie and Irvine.

Rain beat down on the leaking rooftop; thunder echoed through the sky as its partner lit up the night sky. The old grandfather clock began ringing, the glass reflecting the lightening's light. The house was in horrible condition internally, but appeared to be any normal house outside. Bottles of beer and other alcoholic beverages littered the floor. Cigarette butts and the packs they came from littered the counters; ashes covered the tables. The air was stale and hard to breathe, smelling like smoke.

He didn't know why he couldn't be older right now and be out of this hell. For years he had lived in this house; for years he had suffered here. It was here that he gained his scar, here he had cut himself numerous times. The house hadn't been cleaned once in the time he had lived here.

Squall jumped off the couch in alarm as he heard the door slam almost as loud as the thunder outside. He found himself tackled to the ground, covered by a body drenched in the smell of alcohol. He struggled valiantly, taking numerous wounds as he struggled to get out of his father's grasp. Squall found the strength inside of himself to push the man off just enough to slide out from under him. Running with a severe limp, using the walls to help alleviate it, he made his way to the door. He heard his father running towards him with a drunken gait. Desperately, he opened the door and escaped into the storm.

Rinoa shuddered as she heard another clap of thunder from above. She gasped loudly as the phone suddenly started ringing. Cautiously, she picked it up.
"Hello?" she asked, trying to keep her voice from shaking. She received no response, so she hung up the phone.

After the silence of the previous clap of thunder, she heard boots echoing throughout the hallways of the old mansion...

Some parts might seem rushed, but that's because I was trying to get what I wanted in the chapter without it being too long.