To many, sleeping was a means to escape the horrors of world, to blissfully dream of things one wants or aspires to be. For Noella, sleep was the opposite. Tossing and turning under a thick bear skin blanket, horrors laid in wait for her every time she closed her eyes. Darkness surrounded her, whispered sweet lies into her ears, and showed her nightmares that had her screaming and covered in sweat every time she awoke.
Ever since the truth had been revealed to her, the nightmares never stopped. The person in her nightmares weren't the same person as the night before. The first person was Chrom, broken and battered on the battlefield, lying in a pool of his own blood. Every scrap of armor had been ripped off of him, revealing a horrendous gash from which his innards, guts, heart, and all sorts of vital organs; spilled out. Next had been Lucina, then Olivia, Cynthia… the list went on and on and never stopped.
Over the course of two months on the run, fighting through dredges of Risen and marching their way to seek Naga's help to fight Grima, Noella knew this: sleep wasn't her friend. It was her enemy.
Unable to fall asleep in fear of what she might be shown next, Noella laid perfectly still under her sheets, and a poor excuse for a bed. When fear had crept into her heart so deeply that it would not leave her be, she slipped out from under their thick bear skin blankets, and out into the cool night air. The tactician knew who was on guard duty tonight. It was Lucina. Pushing away the nightmares, she began to picture the places Lucina regularly patrolled when she was on duty.
Listening to the faint footsteps coming east of her location, Noella concluded that Lucina was patrolling the area between Chrom's and Sumia's tent, close to where Frederick's tent was located to the north east. The future child of Sumia and Chrom was nowhere near her location. Breathing a sigh of relief, Noella continued walking silently through the camp, carefully stepping over weapons and crates left on the ground, and no doubt, Vaike's doing. Whenever he was asked to put things away in a proper fashion, Vaike would normally forget where to put them and just drop them wherever he pleased. Noella made a mental note to reprimand Vaike as her foot narrowly missed being cut open by an iron sword hidden in the darkness.
The walk to the lake was brief, filled with nothing but the sound of birds and the occasional snap of a twig here and there. It was easy to flee the camp, easier still to escape the clutches of sleep and simply stare into the lake, observing her brand and the weight of Validar's words.
You were born with the markings. You were born to be the vessel for Grima's return!
Although the man who was her father was gone, his words still haunted her to this very day. Staring at her future self who had accepted to become the god, Grima, didn't help things either.
Under the moonlight, Noella spied her bright purple brand reflected in the water, marking her as vessel for a destructive and corrupted god. To her, it was curse, a vile reminder that she was to blame for all the death and destruction happening to this world. She was the reason Lucina had suffered… she was the reason the children of the future were here, fighting alongside their parents.
There might be a way to prevent Grima from coming back.
Noella pursed her lips together as she remembered Naga's words. There was a way to stop the madness from happening again, to prevent Grima from ever threatening another person. The cost, sacrifice her life for the lives of millions.
She stared long and hard into the lake's reflective waters. Two dark brown eyes stared back at her, hallow and lackluster under nature's natural light. Her white hair was gathered into a ponytail with a braid on each side of her head. The stark white color was otherworldly compared to her plain, dull brown eyes and completely flat chest.
Noella took a deep breath and looked away, at the face that mocked her day and night. Even if the choice to strike the final blow would kill her, she vowed to take the chance for eternal peace for her friends and children.
After all, wasn't it her blood that started all this? Should it not be her blood that ends it?
Wind rippled across the water's surface, distorting her appearance into something truly horrific. Overhead the moonlight dimmed as a cloud obscured the thin crescent moon, leaving behind only darkness and despair.
At this point, Noella barely felt the cool wind brush across her pink tinted skin, encasing her in its empty embrace.
A twig snapped echoed in the silent night air and on pure instinct, Noella whirled around without realizing she had no weapons. She was completely defenseless should a risen or a feral animal, come springing forth from the bushes. It was laughable really. The army's tactician felled by a random Risen or an animal simply because she forgot her sword and tomes.
Either it was luck or pure chance for it wasn't a feral animal or a Risen she faced, but a familiar white haired swordsman she knew all too well. Not by choice mind you, Yen'fay just had a habit of sitting wherever he pleased, mediating on battles and whatnot. She just happened to nearly step on him every time.
Purely accidental, right?
The cloud overhead released its hold on the moon, releasing a torrent of moonlight to cascade across the land, illuminating anything and everything the world had to offer. Noella forced a smile upon her face, Locking her sorrows behind closed doors. Her comrades didn't need to know her pain, they needed to smile and prepare for the up and coming battle that would soon decide their fates.
She closed her eyes, trying desperately to mask her emotions. "Seems I wasn't the only one that decided to go for a stroll tonight." Yen'fay didn't say anything and just walked over to the lake, staring blankly at it. Or so Noella assumed. It was hard to tell what he was doing with his eyes closed twenty four hours a day. In a way, it reminded her of Henry because he did the same thing.
"You are restless." He pointed out, quickly piecing through her façade. The tactician flinched, but expected nothing less from the swordsman.
"Was it that obvious?"
"You are without your weapons and still in your night clothes." He paused for a moment, "And you are walking around night, it proves you wished to be alone."
He was blunt and straight to the point, and disarming to a point. But again, he was once a leader so it wasn't a surprise he could read her so well from just one look.
Noella faced the water again, taking Yen'fay's image fluttering across the water's surface.
"You came here to be alone as well." Over the course of two months since they found him, Noella was fully aware Yen'fay liked to reflect and meditate in an unhealthy way. She also knew he was far too hard on himself, claiming he was just a weapon to be used and abused. It sounded oddly like herself right now.
She was a tool to unleash a terrible evil upon the world, something that shouldn't even be alive. Perhaps, in a way, she knew the pain Yen'fay was going through in some small way. He blamed himself for his sister's death in his timeline before joining them in this one and Noella, blamed herself for causing this bloody war which, at any time, claim one of her friends' lives.
"Yes, this place provides some semblance of peace and a chance to reflect." Noella nodded at his response, feeling the same in an odd way. The peace part she disagreed with, but reflection? Yes, this place felt perfect for such a thing.
"Your brand…" Noella flinched at the mention of her brand, and attempted to hide it behind her back in shame. Yen'fey saw her response; silently trying to find a different way to approach the matter. Perhaps he knew how she wished she could wash her hands clean? To start anew as a woman without a curse stamped upon her hand?
"…Marks you as Grima's vessel, does it not?"
"You've heard it from the others, I take it?"
Noella spied a few stray green leaves flying in the wind just like multicolored butterflies, graceful and free as the wind they rode upon.
"It is hard not to with everyone talking about you… and the two choices you've been given." Yen'fay refused to look at her, to which she silently thanked him for since she wasn't sure what expression was etched upon her face had he been looking at her now. Perhaps the best way to explain it was her face looked like a shriveled up strawberry… or… nothing else came to mind besides that one, terrible, analogy.
"I've already chosen my course of action, Yen'fay."
There was an uncomfortable silence between swordsman and tactician. Noella waited for him to pick up on her empty, hallow sounding voice. It was quite clear she was set on dealing the final blow and ending Grima once and for all.
The sound of metal rubbing against metal echoed in the air, drawing Noella's attention to the swordsman who was now sitting by the water's edge. He didn't seem fazed at all.
"If you have decided… there is nothing for me to say." There was no clear indication if he approved of her decision or not. It was always hard to tell what he felt when his voice never seemed to betray his emotions at any given time. The only time it did was inside the tombs back when they first met him, and Say'ri had found him first. It was a strange conversation to overhear to say the least.
"Do you dislike my decision?" She hardly knew why she asked him that question, but then again, she hadn't told anyone her choice. Although, Chrom and Lissa knew what she would pick. They just never confronted her about it. It was a good thing they didn't; and she didn't wish to discuss her reasons to them either.
After all, how could she tell them she wished to die, so they could smile and live in peace without the fear of Grima lingering over them? No. They would argue with her and cause her heart to shift down the path that led to selfishness.
Gingerly, Noella lowered herself to the ground and rested her weary legs. Even after a year of marching with everyone, she still wasn't used to it.
Yen'fay shifted where he sat, reflecting the motion in the water before her. "It would serve no purpose to change your mind, nor do I wish to. You walk a grim path," Noella didn't know whether to laugh or wince at the word, grim. "…In order to ensure peace for everyone. It is both a noble and sad path to walk, Noella, a path many choose to ignore. But if it is what you feel you must do, then to turn you away from it would only make you regret it later."
A sigh of relief passed from between Noella's lips, the pressure lifted temporarily from her shoulders. He understood, the reason why she had chosen to sacrifice herself for the good of everyone one else. It was because she felt she had to, and if she didn't take this opportunity to end it all, she would regret later down the road. But the shift in his voice wasn't overlooked; Noella knew Yen'fay was making sure she didn't make the same mistake he made when he failed to keep Say'ri safe in another future. It was odd that he was sitting next to her now, helping her feel at ease, when in this future, she and Say'ri killed him in order to get to Walhart and end his reign of terror. Funny as it was, Walhart was with them too, and not as bloodthirsty as when they had first met him. It was oddly frightening to think everyone they had met so far and defeated, were walking around in their camp; fighting, sleeping, eating, and doing chores like everyone else. It was very strange.
Something heavy dropped into the lake, causing the surface of the water to ripple and distort their reflections in a rather amusing way. She looked at Yen'fay, noticing a pebble in his hand before he threw it into the water, causing more ripples to spread out. A laugh escaped her mouth before she could cover her mouth. The tactician was oddly aware the swordsman was looking at her, silently contemplating why she laughed. Truth be told, his swirling image in the water looked so amusing, it reminded her of a white monkey or a black blob with white fungus growing on it. Ok, those were utterly terrible things to compare him to. However, the resulting image was still amusing.
Yen'fay smiled, "That is a genuine smile." It took only a second before Noella could confirm her face had turned beet red, or of some sort of variant of red fruit or vegetable.
Noella attempted to change the conversation before the older man could ask about her sudden change in skin color. "D-did you purposely follow me, or was this all accidental?" Well, that was her slightly stuttering attempt to change the conversation into something less uncomfortable. It didn't work out as well as she thought it would. Things inside her head seemed to make sense, but when spoken out loud, they fell apart quite easily.
The smile on his face quickly faded as he pondered, for whatever reason, his response. "Lissa and Nowi expressed their concerns about you, to me since they say we happen to be in each other's paths on a day to day basis," Noella chuckled, remembering the five times she nearly stepped on him in just three to four days. Granted, she had lost count after the sixth time and the fifth day. "However," He continued, completely unaffected by her sudden chuckle, "It was purely accidently I met you here, I was expecting no one else to be here."
Noella sheepishly smiled at him, unsure of what to do. "I'm sorry; I'll find another place to take a nightly stroll, if you're uncomfortable with me here." No doubt her face was burning up again. Her plan to keep her face from looking like a red tomato was a complete failure.
Without a word Yen'fay tossed another pebble in the water, and watched the ripples, allowing her to compose herself for a few seconds. "No, it is alright. We are friends, are we not?" Noella felt her face cooling down as a smile tugged at the corners of her lips.
"Yes we are," she started, "And thank you for talking to me, Yen'fay."
Yen'fay grabbed another pebble and fiddled with it for a bit before responding. "You do not need to thank me. You've given me a great deal of motivation and encouragement to keep me going long after this war is over. It is only natural I do the same for you, as any friend should." It was seconds later that Noella felt another, amused chuckle escape past her lips. And by the time she was halfway to camp, she realized something else she did; she kissed him on the cheek. And in that brief period of shock, Noella realized Yen'fay turned several shades of red, and that his eyes were dark green.
And as luck would have it, Lucina caught her wandering about and started flinging questions like "Are you sick?", "Why is your face so red?", and her personal favorite "Shouldn't you be asleep?".