Welcome to Burning Shade, Fading Light.

You may have noticed that all the chapters have disappeared. That is because the story was in great need of reconstruction and it probably wasn't fair that I unleashed it upon you in the state that it was in. So here is my amended prologue, I hope you enjoy it and please let me know what you think.

Beck

I was Broken

by Marcus Foster

I was tied, but now unbound

My head is off the ground

For a long time I was so weary

Tired of the sound, I've heard before,

The gnawing of the night time at the door,

Haunted by the things I've made

Stuck between the burning light and the dust shade.

I said now I used to think the past was dead and gone,

But I was wrong, so wrong, whatever makes you blind

Must make you strong, make you strong,

In my time I've melted into many forms

From the day that I was born, I know that there's no place to hide

Stuck between the burning shade and the fading light,

I was broken, For a long time, but It's over now.

Yes and you, and you,

well you walk these lonely streets that people send, People send.

There are some wounds that just can't mend, I do pretend, pretend,

I am free from all the things that take my friends

But I will stand here till the end, I know that I can take the moon,

In between the burning shade and the fading light

I was broken, for a long time, but It's over now

I was broken, for a long time, but It's over now.

Edward

Jumping out of the truck's trailer, my feet hit the wet road with a crunch, the ground lurching beneath me. The next thing I knew I was lying on my back looking up at the icy-cold Forks night sky.

The truck door opened and footsteps rushed towards me.

"You ok, man?" The driver asked, attempting to help me up.

"I'm fine." I pushed him off and, with a dismissive wave, walked across the parking lot toward the bar's front entrance. My thoughts were disjointed, fluttery. My mind not quite connected to my body.

I frowned through the fog in my mind as I tried to think back to my last stop: a mouldy motel room that smelt of fresh urine. The hit I'd had must've been stronger than I thought, but I couldn't remember how much I'd taken. I just shot up all I had left and finished off the whiskey. I know it wasn't exactly self-preserving behaviour but I wasn't intending to go out on an OD.

Of all the ways a man could die, that was the most undignified.

The puddles scattered across the gravel lot reflected the bar's broken neon sign like a hundred fluorescent mirrors.

I squinted at the sign, which screamed "THE THREE GRIZZLIES", before ignoring the front entrance and making my way through the parking lot; searching for my getaway vehicle.

Nothing too boring - I wanted to go out with a bang.

Then I found it. An old, beat up, red Chevy truck. The exact kind I watched my father drive away in. Walking over to it as casually as I could manage, I tried the driver's door and it opened with a rusty clunk.

Perfect. Some would call it divine intervention. Even the gods wanted me gone.

As I hoisted myself up into the cabin, my foot missed the ledge and my knee came crashing down on it instead. Luckily, I was too out of it to feel anything more than a brief flash of pain.

Pulling the door shut behind me, I pulled a flick knife out of my pocket and leant down, inserting the blade into a small gap under the steering wheel, and tried to jimmy the panel. It fell away without a fight.

I grabbed at the wires and yanked them out into the dim light, searching for the two that I needed - Is that blue or green? - the darkness and my blurred vision making it damn near impossible. Choosing two, and hoping to whatever god was listening that they were the right ones, I held each wire between thumb and blade, cut off about an inch of rubber on each one, and touched the wires tip to tip.

Sparks.

The engine choked out a disgruntled roar.

"C'mon baby!" I cheered.

With fumbling hands I twisted the wires together, sat back, reached into my front pocket and pulled out a pack of Marlboros. I tapped out a smoke, put it between my cracked lips and reached for my lighter, the momentary loss of focus causing the cigarette to drop from my lips.

Cursing, I pulled out another and lit it, sucking in the hot, thick vapour.

Smoking Marlboros in my big red truck. Just like daddy did.

I choked out a derisive laugh and yanked the gearstick into reverse.

Turning right out onto the highway, I drove a few hundred metres back towards Forks until I found a dirt road. I found a thick clump of pine trees and parked the truck between them to hide it from passing cars.

It was my prize.

I killed the engine and fumbled with my hands for the door handle. As I found it I pressed down, leaning my weight too far forward, and fell as the door swung open. My already injured knee and forearm took the force, the sharp gravel biting into my skin as I scraped along the ground.

Brushing the small stones away listlessly, I made my way back through the night towards the Three Grizzlies.

Inside, the smoke hung like a translucent cotton ceiling and the locals glared as only territorial drunks can.

As I walked to the bar I concentrated on looking as straight as possible, and failed miserably.

The bargirl raised her eyebrows sceptically when I asked for a drink, but placed it in front of me anyway.

"Double whiskey on the rocks. Five dollars."

Dollars? Money... Right.

I searched my pockets and realised, under her scrutiny, that somewhere along my binge-filled path I had lost it. Not that I had any money left anyway, but they didn't exactly chase you for credit debts when you were dead. I searched again helplessly, on the off chance I had a dollar left on me.

No such luck.

I lifted my head in defeat. "Can't a guy get by with sexual favours anymore?" I asked dryly.

She sneered, grabbing the drink back off the bar. "You can pay me, or you can get out."

I saw movement beside me. "It's ok, I got it." A voice, both light and shade, spoke.

The bargirl took the money reluctantly as I turned to see who had paid. I was finding it hard to focus on anything. When I did, I saw a small woman, maybe younger than me, but her dark, haunted eyes said she was not as young as she looked.

"No 'thank you'?" She asked blatantly, pulling at a lock of her long brown hair.

I smiled, raising my glass. "To charity." I said.

She didn't smile back, but she was amused. "To charity." She replied, but before her glass could clink with my own, I pulled it back.

"To my saving angel." I said quietly, giving her my most breathtaking smile. The one that used to lure young women in, to get me anything I wanted.

She touched her glass to mine, looking at me with careful curiosity. "So why you here, stranger?" She asked.

I downed my drink in one, long gulp and looked around at the other patrons. "Don't look like a local, huh?" She shook her head. "How 'bout another?" I said, wiggling the glass in my hand.

She sized me up for a moment, then shrugged. "Sure, why not?" After we had our second round placed in front of us, she turned to me with her glass. "Live every night like it's your last."

"Amen." I smiled, as our glasses clinked once again.

"So what's your name?" She asked.

"Edward." I replied.

She had told me her name in return, but I didn't hear it. My mind was chaotic, one moment in the conversation, the next being pulled back to some random past encounter. Like a wave crashing over and over again, I was resurfaced to find myself gazing into her eyes. They were so open, so unguarded, that I could almost hear the thoughts behind them. I knew I was straying from my original goal, but the longer we talked, the longer I wanted to stay.

"I can almost read your mind, you know." I said.

She smirked cynically. "Tell me then, almost-psychic-Edward."

I leant in closer and she followed, so much so that I could see the faint blue mark above her left cheek – a faded bruise - and the freckles across her nose. I stared into her eyes, flecked with orange and gold.

Her pupils' dilated.

A voice whispered.

Take me home.

I leant back. "You wanna get out of here." I said quietly.

She studied me carefully. "Maybe I do..." She finished her drink and another two appeared before us. "But maybe that's just because it's late... or maybe you're boring me." She challenged.

I laughed. "You know who you remind me of?" She shook her head. "You know those timeless girls who would fit in just as perfectly now as a hundred years ago?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Well that's what you remind me of."

"Tell me what I'm thinking again."

I stared into her eyes for a second time. A saw a shadow flicker beside her head and I looked up sharply.

Nothing.

"Edward?" She asked, turning to look behind her.

"Sorry," I rubbed my eyes and shook my head. "You're thinking...."

...White foam threw itself haphazardly against the cliff face; a thrill of fear and excitement...

"There's a cliff,"

... and hunger, as she pushes herself towards the edge and gazes into the surging darkness below...

"and the ocean..."

She sat up in her chair, the playful look now gone.

Something felt wrong; off. "I dunno..." I said, shaking my head.

"Do it again." She whispered, her gaze fixed on me intently.

I paused, reluctant. I had to narrow my eyes to keep focus. An unsettling coldness began to wrap itself around us.

The shadow flickered again, looming larger, taking shape.

This time when I looked up it didn't go away.

Edward...

In my head, her voice called my name.

Edward....

The voice changed now. A man's: Low. Filthy.

The cold crept up my skin.

"Edward? Are you ok?"

You're not ok are you Edward?

"Do you want some water?"

You've never been ok...

More shadows clawed into my peripheral vision. Mistakes and monsters from my not-so-distant past.

I was freezing.

Fuck up... The voice whispered.

"Edward?" Her hand on my shoulder brought me back to reality.

"I'm fine." I answered robotically, getting up off my bar stool. "I have to go."

She grabbed my arm as I turned. "Wait, I'm leaving too."

We stopped in the lot.

"I'm walking." I said, pointing back toward Forks.

"Ok." She seemed reluctant to go, her limitless brown eyes were pleading. I almost stayed.

"It was nice knowin' you." I said, stepping away backwards, gave her half a wave, and turned away. Any other night I would have gone with her, filled whatever hole she thought I could fill, but tonight I had more pressing plans.

When I was back on the road, I couldn't help glancing back for one last look. She was standing alone in the lot, dark hair blowing about her face, just staring at an empty parking spot.

Back at the Chevy, I started the truck again and shut the door. The sense of purpose now brought clarity back to my chaotic mind. I stepped on the gas and pulled out onto the highway, feeling relief sweep over me as the truck picked up speed. It was finally over.

The Three Grizzlies flew by in a flash and after a few moments I slowly let go of the wheel. Exhilaration gripped me as I relinquished control, released my hold on life.

Now it was no longer up to me.

The truck veered left as the road veered right, and I was thrown against the window, the lights scanning the spinning trees like an old-fashioned silent movie viewer.

Then, the truck chose its path, plunged itself through the tree line, straight and true. I stepped on the accelerator.

Finally a tree, dead ahead. Thick, tall, and large enough to make an impact.

But something was in the way, something small and wide eyed.

It lifted its arms to protect itself.

I took my foot off the accelerator.

It was too late.