This a one shot on jace's point of view about Clary and Simon's relationship and his angst in it all.
This is my first so I'm a little nervous.
---------------------
'Jace's Angst'
Rated R
Set in City of Ashes
Not a second goes by that Jace doesn't check his phone in hopes of seeing at least one phone call from Clary. But none, since the night of Simon's 'rebirth' She has been avoiding him with all costs. He hated this, he hated all of it.
He remembered the tortured look he saw on Simon's face when they withdrew from the waters of the lake. He remembered watching him come to some kind of realization, but didn't know what. He actually felt something for the pathetic little worm. He hadn't meant to kiss Clary like that, truly he didn't. He hadn't meant to rub it in the mundane's face either.
The moment he touched her, the moment, her eyes closed, it was like they were the only two that were there. Like they weren't related and they had all of the world to themselves, free to love and live together. He couldn't help hold her as if he could never hold her again, as if tomorrow would never come.
Jace let out a long sigh, as he walked the streets of New York, finding some sort of escape.
That's what the fearies did, after all. They gave you your deepest desire, let you enjoy it, even only for a moment, and snatched it back, making you wish you had never wanted it in the first place. The queen; it was her who threw their incestuous desire in the mundane's face, not them. Why couldn't she see that?
But Clary refused to to see anything when it came to that mundane. It was the one thing that Jace hated about her. Sure, he understood the fact that he's been her best friend since they were very young, and that she loved him deeply. That wasn't the issue, the issue is that she refuses to see when the mundane is wrong. He was always the one pushing Jace, with rude remarks, and sarcasm. For the Angel's sake, even the first night he met the irritating little insect, he was already insulting him.
"you clearly also couldn't be bothered to call me and tell me you were shacking up with some dyed-blonde-wanna-be goth..."
It wouldn't of annoyed Jace so much, if it weren't for the fact that it was obviously because the mundane hated any other guy that Clary was attracted to.
Yes
It did seem unfair to be in love with a girl you've known your whole life, who doesn't love you no more than as her brother.
Yes
It did seem unfair when some strange guy that she only met recently sparks her attention faster then their child-hood friendship. Than that same stranger, also happens to be her brother. But even that wasn't Jace's fault. It's not like they knew they had any relation when they began to have these feelings for each other.
Then again, maybe the mundane did have a somewhat reasonable reason to act so harshly against Jace.
No! Jace understood all of these things, but he still felt there was no excuse for the mundane's rotten behavior.
Jace has noticed the small hint of prejuidism in Shadowhunters that the mundane posessed. All based on his one judgement againsr Jace. And Clary thought they were the ones who were pejuidice against mundances. The fact that the mundane refuses to consider Clary one of them. When he said that they were all stuck-up spoiled rish brats. If only the mundane knew the way he had grew up. He'd realize the world of Shadowhunters wasn't only what he has seen. Maybe Alec and Isabelle could fit that description, but not Jace, never Jace. Besides, It was his preciouse little Clary that was doing all the hurting, it ws her refusing to see the light. So she makes the mundane suffer more. But this wasn't her fault, Jace saw what she was trying to do, but it was only making things worse for all three of them, and she doesn't even realuize. And the Mundane, the mundane refuses to realize who the real cause for his pain is.
Instead of taking it out on the girl, using him to forget about who she really was in love with, he takes it out on the guy she's in love with. The one who actually saw the aftermath of their heated, passionate kiss in the Seelie Court written all over the mundane's face. she, who was his best friend, avoided his stare.
Jace paused his thoughts for a moment, to let out a humorous snicker.
That's right, the boy is no longer a mundane, he's a blood-sucker now. No longer the 'Mundane' the the 'Vampire'. Jace couldn't help but laugh as he came closer to his destination.
The wretched little satanic-cock-sucker actually thinks he'll have respect and call him by his name. Nope. Not until respect is returned, he'll have to learn how to do that. This problem goes both ways, and at least he was mature enough to see that. He'd stop being rude, and sarcastic, if the Satanic-Cock-Sucker would stop doing the same. But it will never go both ways, the only respect Jace would ever get from him, is if they both agreed to stay at perfectly long distance away from one another.
Jace sighed deeply as he stood outside WoodsCrow Bar. He hadn't been there in ages, not since he met Clary. To be honest he didn't want to be here now. His love for Clary hasn't dissolved yet, nor did Jace believe it ever would. But he had no choice, they were brother and sister, and it was wrong... all kinds of wrong, and he needed to get his mind off of it. A small part of him wanted his old self back. The Jace that wanted girls, then wanted them to leave him alone...
He stepped in, putting on that old mask of his. The stiff, over confident one. He approached the bar and ordered his scotch. Now hopefully this time he could actually finish it. He wasn't planning on picking a fight with a pack of werewolves, tonight he was planning on something much more pleasurable.
He continued to gulp down drinks, letting the buzz take him over, in hopes of not letting his subconsience remind him of a beautiful red head.
"Well, well... look who it is." the beautiful brunette waitress caressed his back from behind. she wore bright red lipstick, which always drove Jace wild. She was a little shadowhunter girl, just earning a bit of little extra money... on the side.
The only answer he gave her was a smirk, and another sip of his drink. Her hand continued up and down his back. He didnt want her the way he wanted Clary, therefore, she wasn't much of one to get a good response out of him. Not many girls he had known could.
"The strong silent type." She practically whispered in his ear.
Jace smirked again.
"What makes you so sure?" He finally said sipping his drink, ignoring the scoff from the dreary looking bartender.
"They say the shy ones, are always the ones that want more." She said taking his drink from him and taking a sip. No one was allowed to do that, except for a beautiful petite with red hair, the color of the waitress's lips. He snatched the girls wrist for taking the glass, but she didn't show any sign of fear.
"No!" He said simply and without any emotion whatsoever. "It's because I'm only interested in one thing, and one thing only."
He took back his drink, taking in a gulp of it, not taking his eyes away from the fiery red lipped doll standing beside him.
"So," She exhaled as if someone had taken her breath away with a kiss. Jace had this effect with many more girls besides this one. "I suppose you'll be ordering the usual tonight."
Jace grinned as he brought his hand down her waist and grazing along her butt. His eyes were deep pools of angry desire, and he wanted nothing more then to lick those lips, that reminded him so much of someone else.
"I suppose," his voice became very seductive. "that you'll be receiving a delightful tip tonight..." he brought his lips to her neck, then withdrew just inches away, letting his warm breath trickle her skin, he heard a sigh from her lips, and mentally thought,
Easy prey...
She was a whore to him, that's all she was, and she would do anything he asked. Jace always had this effect with girls. It seemed as if they worshipped him. Just with one small smirk across his lips, and he could make any girl jump at a blow job with no reward in return. He didn't care, he never did. And for a small moment; he was glad to be his old self again...
It wasn't long till they somewhere private and Jace, was caressing her breasts firmly in is hands. The girl moaned softly, and with that small sound, Jace suddenly had lifted her roughly off the ground and on the table, in her dark obviously sexish apartment. The place looked like a hooker lived there. Her nightstand by her bed had many condoms on it, and her bed comfiter was zebra stripes, and the walls had colors like purple, red or black. The carpet was so soft, a person could sleep on the floor, and never complain about it later.
Jace was gripping her so tight, she whimpered in pain, but didn't protest. suddenly she had withdrew from him, not sure why. Jace almost went completely back to the way he use to be, and was ready to insult her and leave, if there wasn't going to be a fuck tonight. But no, she pushed herself off the table and lead him to the furry couch making him fall back on it. She bent down over him undoing his belt, and unzipping his jeans. The anticipation between her taking off his belt, and unzipping him, made him harden to the point of pain. She must of sensed it.
"You poor boy, you absolutely need to release your tension."
"Are you going to treat me for it? or am I going to have make you?"
She just giggled at his response, he was cruel, and he didn't care, and she obviously didn't care.
She gripped his shaft firmly in her hands, bringing out a groan from deep inside Jace's throat. She stroked it slowly, with each stroke he breathed harder, heavier and faster. Then she brought the whole of him inside her mouth, deep throating. He had to give it to her, she was marvelous at this, fitting all of him was a challenge, and he at least some small respect for her just because of her talent.
His head fell back against the couch, as moan after moan escaped his lips. She began to pump his cock in and out of her mouth faster, trying to get louder moans out of him. immediately after that, she sucked with great force, almost like as if he had shoved his cock into a vacuum hose. It worked; he was yelling now, faster. He made her wet instantly, and he was almost there, she could feel it. And that is why she quickly withdrew him from her mouth. Jace's moans stopped, but he was still panting with his head back against the couch. When he felt her crawl up onto his lap, he sat his head up to look at her. The alcohol must've been kicking in, because all of the sudden, the red lipped brunette wasn't straddling him, it was a petite red head, with green eyes. He wasn't bound to stop her as she gripped his dick again and roughly shoved it within her letting out a yelp and making Jace grip her hips with bruising pressure. She held onto his shoulders for support as she began to ride him, and as he moaned, she rode him faster, and faster. Now he was moaning her name in pure ecstasy.
"Clary... Clary... oh god, Clary."
The Clary figure bent down to bight the pulse point of his neck, making him embrace her completely as he thrusted his hips hard into her. He wanted to take her, take her hard, make her scream his name, make her cry, make her love him. And so he swung her on her back on the couch, and slammed into her with great force, she whimpered and cried, and continued to scream out in pleasure.
"Clary! Oh god Clary!"
"Fuck me!" She screamed "Cum inside me!"
And so he did, he let go every bit of angst and love he had for her out through his cock, spilling his seed, filling the condom he wore. He spoke of love and tears came down his cheeks as he slowed and eventually stopped.
He pulled himself out of her, pulling up his pants, zipping them, and putting the belt back on. His face was still wet with tears, and he still panted heavily from exhaustion. He had almost forgotten the girl was there until she spoke.
"So... um... who's Clary?"
He turned his gaze her way and realized she was no longer the beautiful red head that he swore he had just fucked to the point of never walking again, but the waitress, shadowhunter brunette, with red lips now gone and smudged off.
By the Angel He scolded himself as he buried his face in his hands. He couldn't believe what he had just done. He was truly disgusting, a monster, might as well be a demon. He tried with all his strength not to cry again.
She sat on the other end of the couch watching him with curiosity. She was shocked, he never came to her like this before. She figured that this boy didn't love anyone not even family, until now.
When he didn't answer, just kept his face buried in his hands, she decided to ask again as calm as she could, as to prove that she was only curious, not jealous. She didn't even know the boy's name, why would she be jealous. She's had other boys come and act this way, but never this one.
"Well, who is she?"
Jace finally removed his hands from his face, looked at her without any readable expression, just like before and though his answer was;
"Nobody"
At the same time, he mentally said;
"My sister..."