Bad Pick Up Lines

by guren666

Much to Micro Ice's bad luck, he had lost a bet with D'Jok and the man wants him to use pick up lines with anyone he meets, starting with Snowkids (only exclusion are parents), but they must know the person. And to see if he is really doing his part, D'Jok will go with him everywhere he goes for a whole day. Oh, how joyous.

Much to Micro Ice´s bad luck, he had lost a bet with D´Jok and the man wants him to use pick up lines with anyone he meets, starting with Snowkids (only exclusion are parents), but they must know the person. And to see if he´s really doing his part, D´Jok will go with him everywhere he goes for a whole day. Oh, how joyous. The redhead didn´t even try to hide his giggling as they got dressed and went to breakfast.

The sun was shining its rays of light, radiating through the glassy windows of Academy. The two sat down in silence, waiting for their teammates to show up. It was no big surprise that Thran came in tow with Ahito. The two were inseparable from birth, them being twins and all. They sat down and Micro Ice nervously thought of something. What to say? To whom first? Ahito or Thran?

His question was answered when Thran leaned over the table to get some cereals. Of course, the computer geek will get this one! Micro Ice handed him the cereals. "Thanks man."

"No problem. I might have a problem with my computer. Do you think you could check it out later?"

"Oh, sure, Mice."

There goes the first one: "I think it might be a Trojan. But you can put a Trojan on my hard drive anytime."

Thran almost choked, getting red in the face. The choking woke up his twin, who suspiciously glanced at the redhead who did his best to suppress the laughter. Nevertheless, he patted his older brother and handed him a glass of water. After Thran drank up, he excused himself from the table, saying something about going back to sleep.

His twin didn´t get why he made such a hasty exit all of suden. Did he miss something? D´Jok looked like he won a lottery and Micro Ice plain miserable. He put his hand on Micro Ice´s shoulder. "You okay? You look kinda pale, what´s wrong? Not enough sleep?"

The shorter footballer looked at Ahito who was expecting a response. He´ll give him a response, all right. The talk about sleeping is the only one that comes to his mind right now: "Well, I had a dream about you last night. I dreamt you were a suitcase and I was packing you." Ahito changed colors from red to pink and finally settled on purple. He stood up from the table and also left, saying he´ll have breakfast later.

The two were again alone, but this time, D´Jok was crying from all the laughter. The priceless looks on their longest time friends were all he hoped for when he made the bet. Oh, and it was only the beginning. Micro Ice gritted his teeth. If only he didn´t lose, now he´d be the one laughing. But it´s only for today.

They finished eating and headed back to their dorm room, fortunately for Micro Ice they did not meet anyone on the way. It was after 8 a.m. when someone knocked and entered. D´Jok was reading some random magazine and Micro Ice was scanning throught a column called One Two Three Pick Up Lines for everyone and he totally missed that they got a visitor. "Oh, hey guys. I´ve been looking for you. Whatcha´ doing?"

Micro Ice looked up and closed the topic. D´Jok smirked. "Nothing much. It´s a normal Saturday for us so far. Right, Micro Ice?"

If looks could kill, D´Jok would be dead. The deadly glare he received from his best friend was priceless. His next victim would be Mark, who foolishly sat down next to Micro Ice, who was thinking. This one ought to do it. But it´s rather dirty... No matter. He´ll run even faster away than the twins. Micro Ice didn´t dare to look into Mark´s eyes as he said the inevitable. "I´ve been thinking... is your dad a lumberjack because every time I look at you I get wood in my pants."

Mark´s reaction was comical as he landed butt first on the floor at least two meters away from Micro Ice. Mark looked at D´Jok who conveniently faked that he put on his headphones and didn´t hear what was said. He put down the right headphone. "Hey Mark? You okay?"

Mark nodded and rose to his feet, retreating to the door. "Maybe later guys. I remembered I have a lot to do." The duo could hear just how quick Mark could be if he wanted to.

D´Jok was literally beaming. It´s only quarter past eight and Micro Ice has already got three people running away at high speed at the very sight of him. Oh, this was becoming one the best ever bets he won.

One hour later, they got another visitor, this time it was Rocket. Micro Ice pondered. What could he use? Then he noticed that Rocket had a guitar in his hand. "D´Jok. I have a favor to ask. I hear you know a thing or two about guitars and I wanted to learn a song. You know, Tia´s birthday is around the corner and so..."

The ever scheming redhead pointed to Micro Ice. "He´s the expert on these matters. Ask him for advice or coaching lessons."

Rocket smiled as he approached the sitting dark haired teen. He examined the guitar with his fingers, a sly comment was born as he saw a certain string. "I am afraid D´Jok is a bit exaggerating. I can´t play the quitar that well, but I´ll sure pluck your G string."

Rocket´s reaction was even more hilarious as Mark´s; he went extremely pale and glanced at D´Jok who used the same trick again, pretending to be listening to music. The redhead gazed at the captain of Snowkids, annoyed. "Rocket? I though you wanted lessons from the best, or not?" Their captain energetically shook his head. "No, no... no thanks. No need... I have to go..." And he made his exit. Micro Ice sighed. Well, that´s four down. Good riddance.

Now the only remaining ones were... Tia, Mei and Yuki plus whoever talks to him. Great. What if the coach wants to talk with him? He shuddered at the thought of using pick up lines on the coach. Even if he´ll apologize tomorrow for his very, very bad lines, he didn´t want to meet the coach, Dame Simbai nor Clamp. No, too much awkward, even for him.

"Hey, D´Jok. Please leave them out. The coach, Dame Simbai and Clamp."

"Fine. I see why you´re hesitating, but I was counting them in, so you´ll have to find at least one target plus all Snowkids."

Micro Ice raised his brow. "You including?"

"Well, you lost the bet against me, so I am automatically out of the equation. But the funny thing is that everyone ran! Your pick up lines are pretty bad. I think you overdid it by Mark and Rocket; they looked traumatized, mostly Mark."

"Duh, you wanted this. I feel horrible..."

"You´re not done yet. I am sure Yuki will come by sooner or later and Mei told me she´d go to restaurant Akillian with Tia. We´ll go to meet them, of course. " Micro Ice opened his mouth, but D´Jok cut him off. "And you´ve no right for objections."

He was right of course. And the sooner, the better, Micro Ice thought. "So is Yuki next?"

"Your call, not mine; I only observe. When you do the deed is up to you, but it must be today. Think of something funny, okay?"

Micro Ice shook his head. "How could I lose. I am never betting with you ever again. You have the devil´s luck."

"Luck is essential when betting, Micro Ice. You ought to know that."

The dark haired teen grunted something under his nose, turning on his computer again. The column had good lines, but most of them had a sexual subtle meaning hidden behind them. He though about going for Yuki. He only used them lines only on boys, so girls should handle them better, right?

Micro Ice stood up. "We´re going. I know where to find Yuki about this hour."

D´Jok got up as well and they headed outside their room. The redhead followed after his friend, curious as to where Yuki could be. "So where is she? And how do you know?"

Micro Ice sighed. "She said it yesterday. You weren´t paying attention, were you? Yuki said she´d be busy with organizing Tia´s surprise party. She has to pick a proper place in Academy and decorate it. I am in charge of drinks and I´ll think I will provide my own new line of drinks, called Mice´s Delight. So yeah, she told me she found the place on the third floor. You know, we never quite used that floor. Everyone lives on the first two floors." They got into the elevator and D´Jok pressed the button for the third floor.

They stepped outside and Micro Ice looked around. "Oh, she described the way..." They went right three times and stopped before an old storage room. Micro Ice knocked and Yuki´s voice echoed from somewhere inside, inviting them inside. When they stepped in, D´Jok was in awe. The room was sparkling. Balloons were flowing around them and Yuki had her hands full with colorful paper chains, all handmade by her. "Oh, guys! You came to check on me? This room is spacious enough, don´t you think? If you want, you can lend me a hand and help me with these."

D´Jok looked at Micro Ice, who was once again thinking about a pick up line. He has to catch Yuki off guard, when she´s least expecting it. He´ll do it after they are done... Micro Ice put on his usual smile and took some of the paper chains from Yuki. D´Jok also helped out, not wanting to get on Yuki´s bad side and mainly because he didn´t want to arouse suspicion behind his motive to be here. He was after all, only observing today. And helping out with the party, as it seemed. The trio worked hard on the decoration, getting some furniture from the nearby unused rooms. After it was all done, Yuki grinned at them. "Thank you, guys. Without your help, I would have spend the entire day on the decorating. Now, if you´ll excuse me, I think I am going back to my room, to unwind. "

She was about to leave, when Micro Ice said: "Hey, I just got my room soundproofed. Would you like to test it out?"

Yuki´s small stature froze in place, she slowly turned around, her face burning up. "That... that´s..." She either couldn´t find any words to express herself properly or she didn´t know how to reject the offer he just made. Or she was getting pissed off. Probably the latter. She came closer and Micro Ice, who dreaded how Yuki would react waited. He expected to be yelled at, but not being bitchslapped by her. "You´re despicable!" And she stormed off, fuming and her ears slightly reddish.

Micro Ice held his swelling cheek. Despite her small frame, she packed a punch."I hope you´re satified. Yuki hates my guts."

"Oh, are you still crushing on her? She´s got a boyfriend, you know."

"Yeah, I do know. But that´s beside the point – are we going now into town? Mei and Tia haven´t returned yet."

"I am okay with that. It´s time for lunch, so let´s go eat while we´re at it."

Lunch already? Micro Ice glanced at his phone and it really was time for it. They spend two hours helping Yuki decorate. D´Jok yawned. "Come Casanova, before I get too bored."

Micro Ice averted his gaze, feeling offended. "Fine, Romeo. When I pull one on your girlfriend we will see if you´ll be laughing at this."

D´Jok waved at the mere thought. "Nah, Mei will take it easy, as for Tia... we´ll see." The duo didn´t meet any grownups, not even Dame Simbai heading back to her bedroom from dining room.

They breathed the Akillian chilly air, heading straight to their destination.

Fifteen minutes later, they´ve arrived and Micro Ice´s mother greeted them. "Oh, more of Snowkids, our heroes! Micro Ice, you look troubled. Is something wrong, my dear?"

The dark haired teen laughed the matter off. "No, I am fine, mom. Where are Tia and Mei?"

His mother showed them. "They´re upstairs. Oh, since you´re here, I´ll get you our special menu, but it might take a while. Since morning we´ve had a relentless onslaught of customers."

D´Jok nodded. "Thank you. We´ll go and sit down."

Mirco Ice´s mother smiled as she turned to take new customer´s order. The redhead was so far enjoying himself – it´s only two Snowkids left. They walked up the stairs and saw that Tia was alone, reading through some online book. Mei was nowhere in sight. D´Jok jabbed Micro Ice under the ribs. "This is your chance, she´s alone and didn´t see us come together. I´ll sit somewhere nearby, you just –" His impatient friend cut him off. "I know, Romeo. This will be quick."

D´Jok watched his best friend slowly approaching the unsuspecting Tia. He quietly as a mouse found an empty table, not far from them and listened in. Micro Ice reached her. This better be quick and he found the ideal line. She´s smart, so she will get this one. He cleared his throat and Tia glanced at him. "Oh, hi, Micro Ice! What are you doing here? Of course, you´re here to eat. Have a seat, if you like. Mei should be back from toilet anytime now."

Oh no. He hasn´t got much time. He has to act, now. Micro Ice hissed in pain and knelt down, covering his left eye. "Ouch! Something fell into my eye! Damn, it hurts like crazy!" The ever caring Tia came to his rescue, looking for the source of his pain. "But you don´t have anything in your eye. " Micro Ice stood up. "Oh, it must have been dust. But I think you´ve got something in your eye. Oh, never mind, it´s just a sparkle."

Tia blinked a few times until she got what Micro Ice really said. She went pink. "Well, thank you, but I am with Rocket and I don´t want any misunderstandings. You are a good friend to me and I want to leave it at that."

Micro Ice thought as much. "I see. Don´t tell it to Rocket, okay? I just needed to get this off my chest." Literally. Mei was the last one on his list. It was no surprise that Tia, still shaken up excused herself, saying she´ll head back and told Micro Ice to apologize to Mei for her. He promised her he´ll do that.

The giggling from under a palm tree was getting louder. "Strange hiding place, even for you, D´Jok. She took it well unlike Yuki."

"Yeah. I suspect a similiar reaction from Mei. She turned you down in the past. "

"There you go rubbing salt on my old wound."

"Oh, come on."

D´Jok, who was hidden smirked as he saw his girlfriend coming back. "There she goes. You have some pick up lines left?"

"Yeah, I left the best one for the end." Micro Ice said sarcastically and started reading through the online book Tia was reading before she left. Mei waved when she saw him. "Micro Ice! It´s so nice to see you here. Where is Tia?" She questioned and sat down opposite of him. Micro Ice reminisced about how he called her and angel in front of the guys all the years ago.

"Tia went back to Academy. You know how she´s lovey dovey with Rocket. I am a bit jealous of them. I want an angel to descend down. Oh, but you´re already here. So what time do you have to be back in heaven?"

Mei chuckled, then erupted into a fit of giggling, leaning over the table and smacking him playfully on the back. "Oh, Micro Ice, you always were a smooth talker. If only D´Jok said such things to me."

"He doesn´t?"

"Oh, he does. But not as often. But I love him. And by the way, I have to be back in forty minutes. I am to take care of music, you know, for Tia´s birthday? So I have to head back now. See you later!"

Mei exited and left Micro Ice alone. The dark haired teen sighed, relieved. His friend joined him by the table, grinning from ear to ear. "Well, glad it´s finally over with. I´ve had it with this stupid lost bet."

"My dear Micro Ice, that´s where you are wrong. We said all Snowkids, plus a person we both know."

"Ooh, just give it up. I am done for."

D´Jok was adamant. "No, you have to. Let me find you a suitable target..." He looked around for an ideal scapegoat. His gaze fell upon a tall young man who sat alone, grumpily tapping on the table and drinking some beverage. "Found one. " He motioned with his head and Micro Ice glanced at his target. His eyes widened. "No, this isn´t fair, D´Jok! Anyone but him!"

"What´s the matter, Micro Ice, chicken?"

"No, just... it´s him we´re talking about. I cannot flirt with him."

D´Jok raised his brow, growing suspicious. "Wait, you just planted a bug in my mind. Is he...?"

Micro Ice stood up, slamming the table. "Shut up! I am going, are you happy?!"

The dark haired teen headed towards the solitary table in the southern corner, his hands shaking a bit. "Oh, make it a dirty one, will you?"

While he was approaching him, D´Jok also made his move, moving closer in so he could have a better look at the two dark haired teens.

Micro Ice became aware of him after the second GF cup, completely forgetting about his crush on Yuki. He was a jerk most of the time, but maybe he´s changed.

As soon as he saw the shaking Micro Ice, his face twisted in a mocking sneer. "Got lost, twerp? I am afraid I cannot help you find your chicken coop."

So much for him changing. He looked back, but saw no one. Tch. D´Jok was becoming proficient at finding hiding places. It was one of these days he wished he never betted at all. "Twerp, cat got your tongue? What do you want?"

He felt the redhead´s searing gaze on his back. Micro Ice bit his lip. It´s one thing using lame pick up lines on friends who will forgive him afterwards, but he was a different case. Sinedd was his latest crush. Then it clicked to him. D´Jok set him up for this, didn´t he? Or maybe he didn´t know about it, just figured it out when he nearly said it moments ago. Either way, he cannot back out now. Micro Ice thought about all the dirty pick up lines he read up in the column earlier, but only one really categorized as dirty.

He looked at Sinedd who got a questioning expression. It´s now or never. "I have a F, C and a K. All I need is U."

He didn´t run away, his stare intensified. Micro Ice got a bit red himself and he prepared himself for his dignified escape when Sinedd caught his hand. "Say that again."

Micro Ice blanky gazed at him. Was he making fun of him? What should he do? This isn´t about holding his part of bet, this was... personal. He wants to hear another one? "Your ass is pretty tight, want me to loosen it up?" Sinedd´s eyes darkened. "Is that all you wanted to say?" His voice was challenging. This one is less crude: "Excuse me, can you empty your pockets? I believe you have stolen my heart." This one was true, in the least.

"That´s all good, but is that all?" Again the same question. What did he mean? What the hell wanted he to hear? A fucking love confession? And his grip was beginning to hurt a bit. He thought of another one: "Were you arrested earlier? It´s gotta be illegal to look that good."

"Look at you, sweet talker. I am going to ask you again, is that all?"

He got a brilliant idea. It was also his last resort. "Hey, Sinedd. I know this is not a chat room, but my lips want to chat with yours."

Sinedd grinned as he grabbed him. "All you had to do is ask, Ice Baby." What? Ice Baby? Before he could protest against such petty name, his lips were devoured by a hungry beast and Micro Ice all to happily gave in, eagerly closing his eyes. After they ran out of air, they parted and Sinedd did the unthinkable. He looked at a huge flower pot. "Hey, carrot head. Thanks. "

D´Jok emerged from his hiding place, sheepishly scratching his hair. So Micro Ice was right, they had it planned out!

Micro Ice blinded by rage approached his friend. "You! You tricked me into this! Why the deception and why the hell did I have to traumatize four guys and get slapped by a girl?"

"Who said I couldn´t mix fun with business?"

Sinedd walked to them, putting his hands on Micro Ice´s shoulder. "Don´t be so cold, Micro Ice. I knew you had a thing for me for years, so don´t try to hide it. And you´re not bad looking yourself."

Micro Ice pouted and D´Jok fished out his phone. "I am going back to Academy. I´ll leave you two lovebirds alone." He winked at them before he left.

Sinedd leaned in, whispering in his ear: "Let´s go somewhere more private. I am addicted to yes and allergic to no. So what´s it gonna be?"

The husky voice got him flustered as he averted his eyes, looking anywhere but at Sinedd. "Why bother asking if you know the answer?" Micro Ice said. Sinedd only smiled genuinely at his honest reaction and they walked out the front door, side by side.

It was a good thing he lost the bet, Micro Ice thought as they held hands completely oblivious to the looks they received from passing people.

~ THE END ~

AN – this is a product of a childhood prank I had to do. I lost a bet, just like Micro Ice and was forced to use pick up lines the whole day on my classmates. It was awkward and my crush in that time was one of my targets. He didn´t take it so good as Sinedd, so yeah. Happy ending? Also, the pick up lines were generated at a webpage under the section random pick up lines. I hope you had a blast while reading it. So with that said, I am going back to Sweet with a bit of ice.