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FIGHTING WORDS

We're here and there and everywhere

"..Are we going to talk about this?"

He raised a brow, leaning back against the TARDIS kitchen counter. "Talk about what?"

"You snogged me."

He paused for a moment. "...Yes, yes I did."

"Right... So, are we going to talk about it?"

He shrugged. "Why? It's over now, I won't do it again, no harm done. How d'you feel about Meta-6? It was lovely in the year 5203-"

"Doctor!"

He rounded on her, more than a little uncomfortable. Rose had always understood and respected the invisible line between them, why did she insist on crossing it now? "Rose, just drop it!"

Maybe because he had physically crossed the line when they had been on Galzok not a half hour ago. But it technically wasn't his fault! In fact, he'd had no idea what happened to him in order to lose control like that. The Doctor did not, under any circumstances, snog his companions... Even if he had feelings for them. It kept everybody safe.

She scoffed. "You're unbelievable. Really, you are. We've been doing this for how long and I've never pushed you, but you snogged me, Doctor!"

"I thought you were dying!"

"You snogged me!"

"And?" He demanded. "You snog me all the time! Kissed me on Krop Tor-"

"On your visor-"

"I'm sorry, are you complaining that I kissed you? Is that what's happening right now? Because I could swear that's what's happening right now."

"No! And that's the point! God, for all your brilliance, you are so completely thick sometimes!"

He growled, completely frustrated with her. "This conversation is over, Rose."

The blonde glared at him, scoffing as she approached him, ranting and raving: "... But do we talk about it? Of course not! Let's just sweep it under the rug, just like every hug-"

"Rose-"

"And every kiss-"

"Stop it-"

"And every time someone mentions your past-"

"STOP-"

"... And I sit here, not asking questions because I know you need your space and you don't like to talk about it. No, just run away, like you always do! Crawl back into that place that's dark and safe and always happy and never face it. Well, guess what, Doctor? You snogged me. Properly. And now-"

"You were dying!" He yelled. "You know, I hate to be the one to break this to you, Rose Tyler, but you are not my first companion and you most definitely will not be the last. This conversation is over, because I will not talk about this right now with you. I don't have romantic relationships with my companions and I most certainly don't talk about my past with anyone. I don't know what I did to make you think you were special enough that I would, but I apologize for doing so."

Silence hung in the air, palpable and thick as two feet of concrete.

Every word that had tumbled from his lips regarding her had been a filthy lie.

"Of course." She said coldly, masking the utter despair she was feeling. "How stupid of me to think I was special, right? Thick, unimportant Rose Tyler, uneducated shop girl living off the Estate."

And then he felt like he was submerged in a bucket of cold water: because he did love her, and he did trust her enough to talk about his past. She was special. She was incredible... And for the second time that day, he had messed it all up. "No, Rose, wait- I didn't-"

But she was already heading towards the kitchen door.

"FINE. If you want to wallow in self-pity, be my guest!" He crossed his arms, frowning and muttering to himself. "Women."

She heard him and turned, glaring. Her hand grabbed the doorknob roughly and pulled, frowning when it didn't open. She tried again. Nothing. Growling, the blonde wildly attempted to open the door, pushing and pulling like a woman possessed. But it was absolutely no use... It was stuck.

Rose yelled in frustration and kicked the stupid thing, ignoring the immediate pain in her toes as she kept jiggling with the handle.

Of his part, the Doctor rolled his eyes and approached her, telling her to stop before she seriously injured the TARDIS. He muttered something about being a 'stupid ape' and Rose came extremely close to strangling him. He looked at her expectantly as she stood in front of the door, smiling at her fakely when she fed the expression back to him and moved to the side.

First, he attempted the handle. Nothing.

He looked at her and she raised a brow, smirking at him. He scoffed, taking his sonic out. This would do it. Sonicking the blasted thing, he attempted the handle again, frowning when it didn't budge an inch. He tried again. Nothing.

Again. Nothing. He kicked it.

The TARDIS had locked them in the kitchen.

"Who's the stupid ape now?" Rose smirked.

"Really?" He asked her, unimpressed with her juvenile response. "Really?"

She glared at him. "Just run away, Doctor. After all, that's what you're good at." She looked around the room, pursing her lips. "Not many places to run, though. Might need to hide in the ice box."

"Oh, you're very funny." He said darkly. "Hilarious. You, Rose Tyler, should have been a comedian."

"Sod off."

"Swearing now? Think of what your mother might say."

She would kill him.

The Doctor turned back to the door, pounding on it with his fist. "Let us out!"

But they were stuck.

From the corner of his eye, the Doctor saw Rose begin looking through the cupboards. "What're you doing?" He demanded.

She rolled her eyes, and closed the cupboard door, bottle of whiskey in hand. "If I'm gonna be stuck here with you, I'm gonna need some of this."

"Oh, that's brilliant, Rose." He applauded sarcastically. "Go to alcohol for your troubles. Very mature."

"Well, I wanted to be mature and talk about it, but you're acting like a toddler. So yes, alcohol is required." She bit back, getting a glass and sitting at the table. She poured herself a generous amount of the amber liquid and immediately got down to business, drinking an impressive amount in her first swig.

He sagged against the kitchen door and slid to the floor, looking at her. He supposed she was justified in being angry with him... But did they really need to talk about this? I mean, accidental snogs happened all the time, didn't they? Besides, this conversation was certain to be uncomfortable and painful. Very painful.

They sat in their respective places for a while, looking at each other. Every so often, Rose would take another drink or refill her glass, and the Doctor stewed, guilty.

He really hadn't meant any of what he'd said.

Eventually, Rose had consumed enough alcohol to make reality fuzzy, and made her way over to the Time Lord, getting another glass from the cupboard on her way there. She sat herself down next to him and poured him a drink.

"Thanks." He murmured.

"You don't deserve it." She replied, taking another drink.

"I know... I'm sorry."

She shook her head. "Empty words, Doctor."

"No, Rose, you don't understand-"

She nodded, the movement exaggerated. "Oh, but I do. I really, really do. You say sorry to everyone. I know. And I know you're sorry... But that's all it is in the end: words. Words don't mean anything unless you behave in a way that backs it up." She looked at him. "Drink."

He did, the liquid burning his throat as he drained his entire glass, needing more than a little courage. "Are you... Are you going to leave?" He asked nervously, pouring himself another and drinking that one down just as quickly. His superior biology enabled him to consume more alcohol without feeling its effects, but he wanted to get properly drunk. There was absolutely no way he could handle any outcome of the conversation sober.

Besides, asking the question had suddenly made him paranoid. He hadn't even considered the possibility until he'd asked it, but what if she wanted to leave? What if that kiss had been the straw to break the camel's back?

What if she was tired of him and wanted to go home?

The thought made him break out in a cold sweat and he took an unhealthy gulp of liquor, nearly choking on the stuff as it burned is oesophagus.

Rose frowned at him. "Leave? I don't think so."

He felt like he could breathe again. "No? Oh, good. That's- That's great. Brilliant." Another drink.

"…Were you worried I would?" she asked hesitantly, "Leave, I mean?"

He didn't want to tell her that the thought of her leaving made him feel physically ill, so he didn't. He couldn't. It went against his most important unspoken rule… the rule he'd only had to write once he'd met her. As always, the Doctor ran. The Doctor lied. "...No."

That was not what she wanted to hear. Not that she wanted him to profess his love, half drunk on the TARDIS kitchen floor, but she wanted him to at least acknowledge the fact that they meant something to one another. The blonde rolled her eyes, too hurt to do anything else, and moved away, beginning to slide across the floor.

The Doctor scrambled. "I mean, no! No, sorry. I didn't-" He paused, heels of his palms digging into his eyes as he tried to sort out his thoughts. He wanted to tell her. He needed to tell her.

Why couldn't he tell her?

He already knew the answer. They both technically knew the answer… But knowing and accepting were two completely different things.

He took another bold swig of whiskey, grimacing as it slid down his throat, burning. "I... was worried, yes. I don't- I don't know-" He cut himself off, sighing as he looked at her, uncomfortable. "I'd miss you."

Rose's mouth crooked in a half smile and though she moved back, the blonde refused to touch him. She felt loose and free and calm and possibly slightly- more than slightly- drunk. It took all her concentration to remember that she was still angry with the daft alien beside her, touching him would do nothing to help. "Well, if it makes you feel any better, I could never leave."

He smiled back and nudged her gently with his shoulder, noticing that his skin seemed to spark at the contact. "It does, yeah. A bit." Another swig. "I really am sorry, Rose."

"I know." She sighed.

"I didn't mean any of it. You are special. And you are kind. You are smart. You are important- Hang on, that's The Help."

"Oh, I loved that movie."

"The book was even better."

"Really? I'll have to give it a go, then."

"Yeah- Wait, I was talking about how brilliant you are. And you are." He murmured, fidgeting with the glass in his hand. "Brilliant, I mean."

She smiled at him widely, finding it more difficult to stay angry with him. "Thanks. So are you."

He grinned. "Oh, I know that. I'm also a genius."

Rose giggled and the Doctor felt his body become warm at the sound. "And so modest, too."

He puffed out his chest. "Modesty is overrated."

"Apparently." She grinned.

"But really," He said seriously, narrowing his eyes to look at her through slightly drunk vision, "I didn't mean any of what I said before. You are the most important, Rose Tyler. And I feel very guilty and I am very sorry for making you believe, even for a second, that you are not one of the most special people in the Universe."

She sighed, leaning on his shoulder as she looked up at him, her resolve completely broken. Biting her lip, she looked to her glass, her finger gripping the object tightly. "Why?" she asked softly, "why do you say things like that?"

He frowned. "Because you are."

She smiled at him sadly, wanting so very much to kiss him in that moment. "Oh, Doctor." She sighed.

"What?"

"Nothing."

"I don't understand."

"No," she murmured, "you never do."

He paused, fingers reaching for hers before biting his lip. He wasn't entirely sure how he wanted to word his next question, but knew that it was a terrible idea. However, Drunk Doctor didn't care much for intelligent questions: "Were you disappointed?" She looked at him. "About my kissing you," he clarified.

"Quite a question for someone who doesn't want to talk."

The Doctor shrugged, Rose's head jumping up and down from the movement. "Maybe we could talk about this for a bit. You know, just to make sure we're on the same page and all that."

"Ah, right. Good idea."

"Yeah. So, were you?"

"Was I what?"

"Rose."

She flushed, sitting up properly and looking away from him. "No, I was not disappointed."

He felt both hearts give an unexpected jerk at her words and smiled triumphantly. "Brilliant. Good. Um-"

"Were you?"

He froze. "…Was I what?"

"Doctor."

He didn't want to answer. He didn't want to answer because his answer would most likely consist of him kissing her again… and again and again and again. He'd also be sure to embarrass himself. "Rose-"

She looked at him incredulously. "Seriously? Are you seriously-" She shook her head, anger back in full force. "You are absolutely incredible. Really."

"Thank-"

"No, that's not a compliment. God, you just sit there all Time Lord-y and Doctor-like with your sonic screwdriver and it drives me mad! You never acknowledge it! NEVER! D'you know what that feels like?! No, of course you don't. Because you're you. And I'm me. And sometimes I want to kill you for it! I'm tired, Doctor! I'm so tired of this! All these games and lies and pretending! Why can't you just- Ugh!" She suddenly leaned forward and kissed him soundly, unable to communicate her feelings properly. "There."

He sputtered, brain completely out of commission. "There?! What d'you mean, 'there'?!" He kissed her impulsively, unthinkingly. "Here!"

"Fine!"

"Fine."

"Fine."

"FINE."

Neither remembered who kissed whom, but all of a sudden they were at it again, mouths hot and clumsy against each other. Rose felt the Doctor's hands against her waist, his tongue slick and tasting of whiskey against hers. She groaned when he pulled her closer, her hands moving from his jaw to his hair, tugging. He growled, his own appendages bunching up the material of her shirt before his fingers splayed out against the skin of her waist, his cooler skin instantly boiling upon contact with hers.

This human woman would be the death of him.

Their minds and mouths were muddled, breaths heavy and quiet all at once, promising the sweetest of broken rules. The Doctor took a breath, leaning down to press his mouth to his companion's neck, marking the skin there in what his drunken mind hoped was a permanent display. Let the entire Universe see that this amazing being belonged with him.

Rose bit her lip, her fingers running through his hair as his kisses slowed, his mouth pressing to the skin that met the collar of her shirt before leaning back up and giving her one final, sweet kiss. He pulled away from her, grinning nervously.

She pressed her mouth to his in an attempt to ease his worries, grinning when his hand immediately came to rest upon her cheek. Moving back, the young woman frowned. "Hold on... Weren't we just having an argument?"

The Doctor merely smirked. "That's neither here nor there."

She rolled her eyes. "C'mere."

A tangle of limbs and mouths on the kitchen floor, neither noticed the door swing wide open.