A/N: Here is my first fic with a pairing other than JacobxSeth. I hope you guys enjoy, I'm quite fond of this one shot. Please review and tell me what you think, I have it planned to write another chapter to this and have it as a lemon, so let me know what you think. I may even continue it further than that, but I don't know just yet.
Also, If you are reading my other stories, mainly 'When the Water's Not So Clear' I don't know when my next update will be. I've been working on this and a few other one shots, I think I've just gotten tired of writing JacobxSeth, even though I do love them. I will finish their story, but the updates will come fewer at a time, as I'm sure you've probably already noticed haha. I do apologize, and hope you continue to enjoy my other stories.
Disclaimer: I do not own anything affiliated with Twilight.
It Starts With a Kiss
Jacob's POV
God, I promised myself I wouldn't do this anymore. I promised I would end it. A clean break--best for the both of us. Well I could only hope it would be best for me in the end.
But no, I am weak. A weak little pussy man who can't even end a friendship that has lasted for a good ten years. Well, okay, so maybe it takes a cold-hearted person to end a friendship like that. Especially out of the blue, completely catching the other person off guard and just well … ending it. A clean break. Those are supposed to heal better aren't they? Like when a bone is broken, if the break is clean and not too fractured, not dislocated. Then the bone heals faster right? Right?!
I'm probably making that shit up. I mean fuck, I'm no doctor. But I figure if I end it without going through all that bullshit of slowly pulling apart--slowly and agonizingly pushing my friend farther and farther out of my life until he is but a mere acquaintance--wouldn't that hurt less? Like when you pull a band-aid off, if you don't rip the sucker off in one smooth motion then your just going to tear each individual hair off and fucking cause more pain than needed. Am I right? I know I am.
I also know that's probably not the case with friendships, and being the weakling that I am … I'm never going to end it. So here I am, out on the pavement in front of my best friend's house, running around under the blistering hot summer sun, drenched in sweat as my hair sticks to my face and my shirt to my back, trying to steal that damned basketball that my best friend handles so well … and I was having the time of my life as it usually goes with Emmet Cullen.
"Can't touch this Jake, oh!" he laughs as he maneuvers the ball between his legs just when I try and reach for it. We both are hunched over as if we were sparring on a wrestling matt, my arms spread out by my sides trying to stop his advancement to the goal while he strategically dribbled the ball trying to get past my defenses.
"Oh, you ready for me to bring it home Jake, you ready?" he patronizes me, his face twisted up into a sly smirk. I like to call this his 'game face'. With that smile curving up the right side of his face, his eye would crinkle at the edge, and just a hint of his pearly white teeth would peek out from under his full pink lips. Yes, this was Emmet's 'game face'; confident and playful. Two of the many traits I most adore about him played out delicately in one simple facial expression.
"Which way am I going to go? Huh buddy, huh?"
Emmet fakes left, but I know him by now and how he plays. He switches hands and dribbles to my right just as I knew he would and I take this opportunity to steal the ball from his unsuspecting hands.
"I think you were going to go right there Em." I snicker, "You should have kept your eyes on the ball while you were talking that shit!" I laugh and so does he. He's not the only one with the b-ball skills.
So your probably wondering by now why I would want to end such a great friendship? Well the reason is for the simple fact that Emmet is now taking off his sweat drenched t-shirt, exposing his well sculpted body to the world … and I'm absolutely melting. I try not to stare, but it's damn near impossible. His body is like a Greek statue. His skin is porcelain white, smooth, and toned. He has a small happy trail from his navel flowing to his nether regions which I would give my left nut to see. I look down and see my dick straining against my ball shorts.
Yea, my problem with our friendship is that I cannot see this man without getting a raging hard-on. The sexual frustration I get from just breathing his air, being in the same room, talking to him online! Yes, even talking to him online gets me going. That little default picture of him with his trademark grin … God it's unbearable.
"Yo, Jake, it's your ball. What the hell are you staring at? I know I'm damn sexy but staring it's kind of rude don't you think?" God dammit I was staring again. Good thing he has such a great sense of humor--another quality I love about him--even if he was one hundred percent correct.
I continue playing ball then, half-heartedly as my mind wanders away from our makeshift ball court. I don't know how much more of this I can take; I've been gay for about a year now. Fully in the closet I might add. People would surely eat me alive if they knew any better, not to mention Emmet would hate me. Well, I guess that would be one way to end our friendship but I don't want anyone to know just yet.
"Jake, come on man, where you at?"
"Huh?" I ask stupidly, flinching back to reality as he taps me on the head. "Oh sorry." I add, turning around to see the ball rolling across the pavement. Wow, talk about needing to get your head in the game.
"It's okay … is something wrong?"
"N-no … why?" I lie as usual. It's become more like a habit than a defense mechanism.
"You just kind of spaced out there … but okay, if you say you're alright. Score is 12-10, my lead by the way." he informs me before slapping me on the ass and running to get the ball. I swear his hand lingered on my ass a little bit longer than usual, but hell maybe I'm delusional.
"So how's it going with Rosalie?" I ask, trying to make conversation. I need to get my mind off of that mess I was thinking about before, focusing on the game is out of the question. I can only ask for a distraction, concentration is a being a bit greedy. I don't care if he wins; he usually does anyway, and I'm to depressed now to play my best.
"Ah you know, same old same old." he tells me as he goes in for a lay up, scoring two points. I didn't even bother to block him, just stood there and watched him make the shot. He gave me a questioning look as he rebounded his own shot and handed it to me. "Yea I think I'm getting tired of the same old same old however."
"Really?!" I ask, perking up at that. This is news to me. Anyone would be glad to have Emmet's 'same old same old'. Well besides me. Rosalie is the hottest bitch at school, or so I'm told. I know I'm gay when she does nothing to turn me on.
"Yea, I just … I don't know, I've been confused here lately." he admits, trying to steal the ball from me as I dribble it between my legs. I go for a shot which he easily blocks.
"Confused? What do you mean?" I ask, interested now. I thought he and Rosalie had like the perfect relationship. I thought for sure they were going to have some huge wedding after college, then go off to make pretty little babies with Emmet's smile and Rosalie's beautiful hair and Emmet's chocolate brown eyes. The kind of babies I would never have and forming the kind of bond I'll never share with Emmet.
Emmet just shrugs at me and starts to dribble the ball he rebounded, staring aimlessly down as he dribbled between his legs. What is with him? There is something he's not telling me, he pointed that out plain as day.
"Bullshit Emmet, what is it?" I say as I take the ball from his hands effortlessly. Now he was the one who needed to 'get his head in the game'. I wasn't the only one spacing out.
"Well its just … I don't mean to sound like a pussy but … ." he starts, and I dribble circles around him as he stands in the middle of the court. "I don't think my heart is in it anymore."
Well talk about being blindsided. I knew Emmet had his soft side, but damn, when your straight and with Rosalie, it's the hard side that matters. Not saying she's a whore but … well okay, yea I'm saying she's a whore. I try to be nice considering Emmet's feelings but I really hate the bitch.
By the way, I hated her before she got with Emmet, not just because I'm a jealous bastard (even if that is true). There was just something about me and Rosalie that never clicked; she hated me first before I ever said a word to her.
"So, what are you saying? You don't love her anymore?" I prod, shooting the ball at the goal, scoring two more points. "Woot! And he scores!" I say as the ball swishes through the net, I make 'crowd cheering' noises and get all up in Emmet's face. He pushes me away and I chuckle.
God damn, I really am coldhearted. The fact that Emmet is getting tired of Rosalie is putting me in a good mood? Fuck, what kind of friend am I?
"Maybe, I don't know … also… ," He looks around, then walks up to me placing a hand on my shoulder, the basketball hooked under his other arm, and whispers, "the sex isn't doing it for me anymore. I don't know what's wrong. Maybe my dick is broken?"
Holy fucking shit. Did Emmet really just admit that he doesn't like the sex with Rosalie anymore? Am I dreaming?
"There's nothing wrong with your dick."
'Maybe I should take a look at it just in case though.' I think as I laugh at myself and him.
"It's not funny man." he tells me, trying to be serious, but I can see his eyes shining in amusement as the corners of his mouth twitches. "My dick is broken and your laughing at me!"
I laugh harder then, bending over to hold my stomach. "Want me to take a look at it?" I look up at him, wiggling my eyebrows suggestively, voicing my earlier thought. I was totally serious though.
"Man … no … fuck … ." he says through fits of laughter. We both fall to the ground then, the basketball rolling across the pavement away from us, and we continue to laugh. This is why I haven't ended the friendship. This is why I can't let myself leave. Moments like this, when we just laugh 'til our insides hurt. I can't be myself like this with anyone else, and he has always been there for me. I've had to hide so much and pretend to be someone different for the past year, but at least around Emmet I can let some of the walls down, if not all of them completely.
We lay there for a moment longer as our laughter dies down, both of us panting as still surviving laughs escape every now and then. Emmet then sighs, hopping back onto his feet and offering his hand to help me up too. "Come on, I'm still in the lead but you could just beat me for once. But ya know, it is highly unlikely." he challenges, smiling that smile that melts my soul and putting back on his playful 'game face'. I snicker and take his hand only to pull him down and he falls on top of me.
Bad move Jake, bad bad move. Emmet was now on top of me, his bare beautiful chest against my clothed one and I wanted so badly to rip my shirt off and feel his flushed sweaty skin against mine. Then something else happens … something worse. Our groins touch through our ball shorts, sliding across one another and the friction shoots a soul melting fire through my being. I almost moan before I realize the situation with my head other than my dick. I was hard as a rock with my best friend--who I want to fuck me senseless-- laying on top of me. I know he has to feel my excitement.
"Whoa … uh … ." Emmet is up off of me as fast as he was down. I scramble to my feet myself, dusting myself off just to occupy my hands. I brace myself and look at him. He was staring at me incredulously, his face flushed red, and I looked down out of shame and was met with a sight to beautiful for words. Clearly straining against his black ball shorts was his hard dick, saluting me in all it's glory. Saying I almost died was an understatement. I shot a look up at him and quirked my eyebrow. He just turned, and I could see his ears were burning red hot too. I'm pretty sure it wasn't the game, which was undergoing an unofficial time out, that has his face so red.
"So … uh yea … ready for me to kick your ass and get this game over with?" he says, not making eye contact with me, and I nod before going to retrieve the forgotten basketball.
We play hard after that (no pun intended), both of us giving the game our all. My shirt was getting way to wet with sweat so I pealed the sticky material from my chest and threw it to the side. I swear Emmet stared as I did this, much like I did when he removed his shirt, and my face flushed red under my tanned brown skin. After that it was like Emmet was afraid to guard me. He kept his distance, and when ever his hand would brush up against my exposed skin, it would linger for a few moments to long then flinch away as if he was suddenly burned.
He was really freaking me out. He has never acted like this around me before and I swear … not to quote my favorite fast food restaurant but … I'm lovin' it!
"Ohhh take that Jake!" Emmet shouts as he shoots the ball towards the goal, scoring another two points. It's now a tie, 22-22.
"Yea yea." I say, rolling my eyes, "next point wins and it's my ball."
"Oh you're so not getting to the goal."
I put on my best 'we'll see about that' smirk and drive towards the goal, Emmet all up on me, no longer shy for fear I might win, and I jump for a shot.
Emmet jumps not a second later than I do, the ball is released from my hand heading toward the goal and Emmet plows into me in the air, his hand missing the ball and slamming down into my shoulder. We fall to the ground in a thud, him on top of me, and I watch the ball fly towards the net.
"Ohhhhh! And one baby!!!!" I say as I hear the lovely swish of the net when I score the game winning point. I smile brightly as Emmet looks at me from on top of me! He has a scared expression on his face, almost … nervous. He makes no attempt to move.
I notice then that the same incident that occurred earlier is yet again happening. Only this time we are skin to skin, chest to chest … groin to groin. He still makes no attempt to move. My body betrays my will as I feel myself harden slowly.
I can feel him breathing on me in rapid breaths, his chests moving against mine as my breathing increases like his. Our hearts beat together, I can feel his thumping right against my own, and I think I'm about to cum.
"Well … here we are again … seems I can't stay off of top of you." he tells me breathlessly.
"Yea … It seems that way." I say with a chuckle.
He stares at me like he's lost somewhere and doesn't say another word for a few moments.
"We should um … probably get up now." I say nervously.
"Yea, we probably should." he replies back in a feather soft whisper.
Emmet plants both of his hands next to my face, propping himself up off of my chest, but he made no further attempt to get up.
"Um," I laugh nervously, wiggling beneath him uncomfortably. "Emmet?" I question. What was happening here?
"Yea?" he says in a hushed breath.
His face was slowly inching closer to mine, and I felt myself blush so deeply at the proximity. Was he about to … to kiss me?
"Emmet … ." I say more than question this time.
"Jacob, I don't know what is wrong with me." he admits, our faces nearly centimeters apart.
"Nothing is wrong with you." I try to reassure him. He is perfect in my eyes.
"Are you sure about that?" Our noses are barely grazing one another now.
"Yes." My voice cracks as my breath hitches.
"Then why do I want to kiss you now?"
"I don't know. Why do I want you too?"
"I don't know." Emmet then closes the gap between us and my whole body is like a electrical circuit that has now been reconnected; a light switch flipped on. It feels as if in this single moment, the pain that I have endured, the secrecy I have kept-- it all has now been washed clean; a weight lifted, a wound healed. I feel like I've held my breath for so long and this was me exhaling, releasing all that strife and pent up frustration. In this kiss that might as well be my first, I feel--for the first time in way too long-- true happiness.
Emmet then pulls back, and I open my eyes to see him above me, a soft smile spread gently across his face.
"I've wanted you to do that for so long … ." I say as my voice breaks and my eyes water.
"Was it worth the wait?" he asks me softly, his eyes closing to small slits, his dark brown eyes barely peeking through his long black lashes.
"Definitely." I whisper, and my own eyes close again, forcing a tear to roll down my face. I crush my lips up into his and fall into a deep chasm of bliss that I never wish to find my way out of.