I See the Light Chapter 1: Tony's POV, an avengers fanfic

I See the Light

Disclaimer:
As usual, I own nothing!

Rating:
T (just to be safe...'cause I never really know where my mind is gonna go with these things...)

Genre:
Romance/Drama

Pairing:
ScienceHusbands (Tony Stark/Bruce Banner)

Lyrics Used:
Mandy Moore & Zachary Levi "I See the Light" [From Tangled]

Author's Note:
This story is written as an answer to the Disney Song Challenge issued to me by RandomFanatic from the The Avengers Challenge Forum! I hope I do the song justice! If you've never seen Tangled or haven't heard the song for any reason, I IMPLORE you to look it up on YouTube, iTunes-ANYTHING! It is a BEAUTIFUL song and you simply must hear it once in your life in order to call your life complete!

Also, I'm writing a one-shot for this fic (which is rare for me). But, I hope it turns out as well as my chapter fics!

Now that I see you

It was late-almost one o'clock in the morning. Most people were usually sound asleep at this ungodly hour. But-then, again-I've never really been like most people. However, in all fairness, I did try to sleep-Really! I did. But, I can't shake this nagging feeling like something's wrong. And, not just that something's wrong but that something's really seriously wrong with my best friend-hell, the only true friend I've ever had-in the world, Dr. Bruce Banner. Bruce has been acting strange lately. He's been a lot more withdrawn and quiet lately. Frankly, it scares the living hell out of me. I've always worried about him-in the back of my mind-ever since he told us about the time he tried to kill himself. I've never had a friend like Bruce before-someone who actually takes the time to understand me and actually gives a damn about me beyond just the Stark name and legend-and, I can't lose that.

And, it's more than even that. I've never said or done anything about it but...Well, I've been in love with Bruce ever since I first laid eyes on him. I remember it like it was yesterday. I strode into the helicarrier and jumped right into their conversation half way into it and never missed a beat. I was off in my own thoughts when I heard someone's voice keeping right up with me. The one person in the room that was actually following my train of thought. I had to meet him. I didn't care about my thing about people touching me. I walked straight up to him and offered him a firm handshake. Looking into his eyes at that moment, I knew I wanted more than just friendship from that man. But, I also knew of his past and knew I would have to take things slow. So, I did.

But, the days turned to weeks. The weeks to months. And, now, those months have turned into a year and Bruce has never shown even the slightest interest in anything more than friendship with me. It's okay. I mean, is it everything I ever wanted or all I ever dreamed of having with him? No. But, that's okay. I'm happy just to have Bruce Banner in my life in any capacity and-if he's happy with just being friends-then, that's good enough for me. That's what I want more than anything. I just want Bruce to be happy-even, at the expense of my own happiness. Sure, it would kill me if I ever saw Bruce in a relationship with anyone else, but, if he was happy, I'd let it go at that. But, that's the thing...Bruce isn't happy, right now. Or if he is, he sure has one hell of a funny way of showin' it.

That's it. I can't take it, anymore. I have to go check on him. If I could just see for myself that everything's all right-that Bruce is okay-that would definitely go a long way toward making me feel better. "Jarvis? Where is Dr. Banner, currently?" I asked, as I rose from my bed and crossed the room over to my closet where I pulled out a black tank top and a gray pair of sweatpants.

"Dr. Banner is currently in the armory, sir." Jarvis answered in his characteristic smooth, posh British accent. But, the words themselves made my blood run cold. Oh God...He isn't...Is he? "Shit." I have to get down there, now. I forwent socks in favor bolting down the hall in my bare feet to the elevator. I have to get to Bruce, now. As the doors slide closed and I press the button for my desired floor, I stare at the lights above the door-the numbers ticking by far too slowly. I vaguely wonder if the stairs may have been faster. Finally the elevator stops with a faint ding as the door glide open. I ran out of the elevator as my eyes frantically searched the room for any sign of the good doctor.

"Bruce?" I called out, carefully. No answer. Shit. "Bruce?!" I tried again, this time, my voice far more panicked than I would have liked. Finally, I looked around a corner and saw Bruce sitting on the floor, leaning back against the wall. I almost breathed a sigh of relief. Almost. That is, until I saw the black pistol in his hands. Oh my God...He was...He was going to...Oh my God...I have to stop him. I don't know how, but, I have to figure something out.

When I found the strength to will my legs to move again, I raced over to where Bruce was sitting and all but threw myself onto my knees by his side. "Bruce?" I asked, trying to get his attention again. "My God..." That part was whispered more to myself than anything. Finally, I got the good doctor to look up at me. The look in his eyes was...Hard to describe to say the least. They were so weary and worn, tired from dealing with...Whatever it was that was bothering him...But, they were also suprised-shocked even.

"Tony?" He asked. His voice was surprised-to see me, probably-but even at that, he still sounded weak and broken. It broke my heart to hear it. However, my eyes were drawn to the gun in his hands. "What are you doing here?" He asked, following my eyes down to the pistol. "I thought you'd be alseep...Like everyone else."

"Couldn't sleep." I couldn't even think of a witty comeback. All I could see in my head was Bruce putting the gun in his mouth and pulling the trigger. What if he succeeded, this time? I can't even begin to imagine a life without Bruce Banner in it. I couldn't live without him. I just...I couldn't handle it. Shaking those thoughts from my head, I looked up into Bruce's tortured brown eyes, aching to make all the pain go away-to just take away all his pain, even if that meant suffering that pain, myself. "I was worried, Bruce. Terrified, even."

"Of what?" He asked, his voice so quiet, I nearly had to strain to hear it. What the hell does he mean 'Of what?'...Of losing everything that ever meant anything to me! That's what!

"Bruce, you haven't been yourself, lately!" I asserted. "And, don't even try to deny it. You know it's true-hell, we all do! The others may be too afraid to call you on it, but, I'm not!" I continued. I didn't know what to say or how to get through to him so I just went with my gut and spoke from the heart. "Damn it, Bruce, talk to me! For the love of God, let someone in, for once! You're not alone, anymore, Bruce! You have friends, now! People who care about you! Let them help you!" I had to will myself to reamin calm and focused as I felt myself becoming more and more panicked.

Just then, a humorless chuckle escaped Bruce's lips as he looked directly into my eyes with those eyes that made you feel as though he could see straight through your soul. "Friends? Hm. Is that what they're calling it, these days?" He asked, sarcastically. I knew he didn't believe me. I just didn't know how to make him believe me. "Don't lie to me, Tony. I've seen the way they all look at me when they think I'm not looking. The way they all try not to look like they're always tip-toing around me, walking on egg shells around me-terrified of setting me off! They're not my friends, Tony!" By the end of the sentiment, Bruce was half-shouting. But, then, his voice dropped back to a whisper. "None of them are."

"Fine." I said, finally. "They're not your friends, okay! The hell with them." I said, my eyes staring back into Bruce's eyes to drive my point home. "Take them out of the equation and you've still got me, Bruce! I'm still here and I'm not going anywhere! You know I'm not one to walk on egg shells, now, am I?!" Bruce's only response was a non-comittal noise. "I mean it, Bruce." I softened my voice slightly to show how serious I was about caring for him. "For the love of God, just...Just put the damn gun down, Bruce. Just talk to me. Let me in. Let me-" I had to stop myself before I said too much too fast. But, Bruce interjected before I could finish.

"Let you what, Tony?" He asked, exasperated. "Tell me that this isn't the only way out? That my life is too valuable to just throw it all away? That people would miss me if I was suddenly just-gone? That's bullshit, Tony, and we both know it. Everybody thinks of me as nothing more than a mindless beast-and, let's face it..." He sighed, so broken and so defeated. "They're right." Bruce stared down at the pistol in his hands for a moment before looking back up to me. "And we all know that every dangerous beast has to be put down, don't we?"

"That could not be further from the truth." I reached out a hand to gently guide Bruce's face up to look into mine. Once I had his gaze, I reached my other hand up to gently cup his face and hold his attention. "You are not a mosnter, Bruce. In case you've forgotten, neither is the Hulk. He saved my life, remember? I will always be grateful to him for that. He didn't just catch me as I fell from the sky-which that, alone, would be more than enough to dispell your theory of being nothing more than a mindless beast-but, he also had the presence of mind to jump start my heart right when I needed it." I saw the tears start slipping down Bruce's cheek and I couldn't stop myself. I gently wiped them away with my thumbs.

For a moment, Bruce and I just sat there like that-his face in my hands as my thumbs gently wiped away the tears that continued to fall. Then, the unbelievable happened. I was finally able to breathe a sigh of relief when Bruce laid the pistol down on the floor, away from himself, and all but threw himself into my arms. I didn't care why, I just wrapped my arms around him and held him close to me as a choked sob erupted from his lips. And, we stayed that way for...I don't even know how long. I simply held him tight as the violent sobs wracked his entire body, bringing on a round of my own tears with them.

"Tony, I-" Bruce choked out. "Thank you!" Say what? After another moment or two, Bruce finally calmed himself as the sobs died away and he pulled himself free of my embrace. Though, he only pulled far enough back to look into my eyes.

"For what?" I asked, my voice uncharacteristcally soft and gentle, as I dried the last of his tears from his face. Bruce just smiled softly as he took one of my hands from his face to hold it lightly in his own on his lap.

"For being there." He said simply, staring at our hands in his lap. "For caring enough to reach out when no one else did." He added, entwining our fingers. I'm not really sure exactly where he was going with this, but, I'm more than willing to let him do whatever it is he feels like he needs to do. "For showing me-beyond any shadow of a doubt-that someone cared." I couldn't help smiling at the sentiment. "That's all I've ever wanted. Just...to know that somebody cared. That someone saw me for more than just 'the beast'." Finally, he looked back up to meet my gaze. "But, what I really wanted to know was that...That you cared. That you saw me as more than just a mindless monster hellbent on destruction."

I can't believe what I'm hearing. God, if only I'd known that sooner... Was all I could think about. If I had known that sooner, we could have avoided this whole disaster. I can't help it. I'm so relieved that the tears start slipping down my cheeks again as I smile at Bruce, raising my free hand back to his cheek, just gently stroking the amazingly soft skin with my thumb. "Bruce, I...I've always cared about you." My voice was trembling with all the raw emotions running through my body. "More than that even...Bruce I-" I paused as I drew in a steadying breath. I've come too far to turn back, now. "I love you."

Bruce seemed to just...completely freeze at my words. Oh God...Maybe I should have just left it at "I've always cared"...Panic ran through every vein in my body as I waited on bated breath for Bruce to say...Something. Anything... Then, I finally released a sigh of relief when Bruce smiled that brilliant, genuine, smile he seems to reserve only for me before his hands left mine and grasped onto the straps of my tank top and pulled me in close as he tentatively pressed his lips to mine.

Oh. ... My. ... God. Bruce is kissing me! Bruce Banner is actually kissing me! And, oh God does it feel good! My eyes slipped closed as my hands found Bruce's hair and neckline, holding him close to me, maintaining the intimate contact. After a few chaste, closed mouth kisses, I felt Bruce's lips part as his tongue ran across my bottom lip, seeking entrance which I happily granted. God, he tastes amazing! I've dreamed of this moment millions of times but this is better than I could have ever imagined. The next thing I know, I'm laying back on the floor as Bruce lowers himself down on top of me. Our tongues continued to dance their heated rumba a few moments longer until Bruce pulled just far enough away gaze into my eyes, his hand gently caressing my face.

"Above all else...Thank you for helping me see that I'm exactly where I belong." He replied as the classic Bruce Banner, million-watt smile returned to his face. "Thank you for loving me." He pressed his lips to mine once again in a slightly longer than chaste closed-mouth kiss before adding in one last sentiment. "I love you, too, Tony." He paused a moment to kiss my collarbone before adding "I always have."

Author's Note:

Okay, so...The whole time I was writing this I kinda was thinking about turning it into a two-shot and writing another chapter from Bruce's POV. I don't know. Whadday'all think? Should I do part 2? Or just leave it, here? Drop me a review and let me know what ya think!

~Shaelynn