Headcanon: America talks a lot at meetings so that he doesn't get aroused at by the foreign accents. (At least it was something like that, I lost the link to it.)

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia

There were rare days when America would shut up at World Meetings.

Involuntarily, of course.

Unfortunately for him, it was one of those days.

America sat in his chair, a disappointed look plastered to his face. Why, you ask, is he not spouting ridiculous comments about heroes and justice?

Two words: Sore throat.

America slouched in his chair dejectedly, his throat even too dry to chow down burgers at his usual fast pace. He tried sipping on sprite, then recoiled at the burning sensation. He sighed.

Meanwhile, the other countries were causing (much to Germany's dismay) chaos- kicking, yelling, vows of bloody murder…-

"You bloody frog! Get your filthy hands away from me!"

"Ohonhon, Angleterre, you certainly don't mean that~"

"Kolkolkol…

"Big brother!"

…!"

"Lovi~"

"Agh, Tomato Bastard!"

"I agree with America." (Which was weird, America was silent the whole time)

"Man up, or I'll beat you with my peace prize!"

"Zzzzz"

…- the usual.

In the midst of all the pandemonium, no one noticed how America's eyes perked up frantically.

"EVERYONE SHUT UP!"

The whole world (or at least part of the world) looked up at Germany.

"We've called this conference to solve the world's problems. Not to fight about the problems of our past. And since I'm the only country who seems to know how to run a meeting, we'll follow my rules from here on out. Eight minutes each for speeches. No chit-chat about side-deals. And absolutely no going over the time limit. Now if you want to go, make sure you're prepared and raise your hand. But do so in a way that does NOT mock any salutes of my country's past."

'Whoa, deja-vu moment', ran through everyone's minds.

'Ach! This can't be happening!', ran through America's mind as his cheeks warmed and his face was tinted a delicate shade of pink. 'No. No. No, no, no, no!'

'Come on, dude. Happy place! Happy thoughts! Burgers, wraps, Hot Pockets! Anything but this!'

"Whilst our poor little hero squirmed in his seat, Japan hand was raised (by Switzerland).

"Eh?!" Japan was startled to find that everyone's eyes were on him. "Oh, er…About global trade…"

The U.S of A twitched and blushed a little more. 'Urg, why me?' he wailed in his mind. He tried to drown out everyone's voice.

"Ve~ Can we trade pasta, Romano? Please?"

"What? No! Tomatos!"

"Really, Lovi? Then I can trade with you!"

"Ohohonhon…I suppose I can spread some love all over the world~"

"How about some British cuisine!" England brightened at his idea.

"…"

By then America was a steaming tomato. 'This is too much. I can't listen to this anymore!"

Finally, someone noticed America's very obvious distress.

"America? What's gotten into you?" England furrowed his (read: humongous caterpillar-brows) eyebrows.

'This is the last straw! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE! STUPID IGGY AND HIS STUPIDLY HOT BRITISH ACCENT! STUPID WORLD AND THEIR EPIC ACCENTS!' America roared in his mind. He flipped the table, still looking like a ripe tomato, and stormed out of the room. He then rushed to the nearest bathroom to take care of his 'little problem'.

Unluckily for him, no one else heard his little mind-rant, and were left perplexed.

"Was it something I said?"

And that, was my herp-a-derp fail at humor. I will now drown in my shame. I knew I drew better than I wrote. That's why my deviantart is on my profile! *shameless self-advertising*

I swear, I'm only funny in conversations. :(