This was written as an English exam and I decide to put it up here to see what other people thought of it.
Please R/R!
Journey to Dracula's Castle
I took my seat on the train, watching as the passengers flooded into the empty seats surrounding me. The dull brown leather was as cold as ice and the dampened wood creaked with every movement when the train lurched forwards. The loud shrill of the whistle echoing through the now silent carriages, with nothing but a few whispers from the staff members to be heard. The sudden increase of the train's speed caused my body to jolt, distracting me from my thoughts. The pale blues and oranges of the twilight hour slowly melted into the thick blackness of the night, each object being submerged in the never ending darkness from outside the fogged window. I did not know how long the journey would last for but it seemed like there was no station at the end of the tracks.
The wheels of the trains screeched as it slowed down, jolting everybody out of their seats. A light faintly flickered in the wind as the train came to a halt at the station. The mad rush to get off the train caused me to lose my balance slightly, fumbling my way through the lingering darkness with my bags. Once I got off, I stood there in the silence and scanned my surroundings, wondering to myself if anything hadn't been engulfed by the darkness. The only way off the train station was through a small alleyway. I edged towards it, gazing down its long, dark and menacing entrance. It was cold and uninviting and as I stepped in, something crunched under my foot, causing me to jump. I stepped fully into the constricted space, walking as fast as my legs would carry me. The stench of urine hung in the air, making my throat tingle. The heavier I breathed, the more my eyes felt like they were burning out the socket in which they sat. The wind snapped at my ankles, a wild dog ready to feed. The heavy oak gate at the end swung open to reveal a carriage waiting within a courtyard. Already people pushed past me, loading their bags onto the several carriages that consumed the street. I could see inside the carriage, deep seats that made me want to sink into them. As I stood, wondering if I should just go back home, an elderly woman pulled me forward to the coach, taking me into it's musty and cold interior. As she went to leave, she pressed a small token into my hand. I glanced down to see what I held, a crucifix, and as I raised my head to thank her, she had already vanished into the darkness of the night.
The carriage jolted into life, the strange and unfamiliar accents of the riders and drivers caused my stomach to knot. I looked beyond the carriage interior, out into the blackness. Strange lights flickered along the rough path, an unearthly blue glow dropping off what seemed to be the edge of the world. The carriage moved swiftly along the unknown path, the cold, dark shadows of the dead trees dancing in the moonlight through the thickly fogged window. The lonely cries of owls giving a voice to the lifeless shadows that lingered in the corner of the carriage. The gentle drops of rain patted dismally against the roof of the carriage. The horses hooves keeping in time with my heartbeat. Each bump could be felt as the carriage pulled to a halt.
Nothing compared to the chill of the night as I gazed upon the secretive gates of the castle hidden deeply within the Carpathian Mountains. As I descended the steps of the carriage, I saw a tall figure emerge from within the castle grounds. The thick heavy clunk of keys turning in the imposing iron gates echoed through the rocky mountainside. An old man with dull grey hair emerged from behind the gates. He held a small light in his hand and beckoned me in with his other. He was well shaven with a long white moustache and not a single speck of colour about him. His garments were very smart and he wore a cape around his neck which fell to the floor. The silver moonlight reflected off the floor, but it cast no shadow behind him. He stood like a statue, watching me until I was fully inside the gates. He extended his arm and took my hand, quickly raising it to his lips and placing a soft kiss on the back of it.
" Hello and welcome to my castle! I am Count Dracula."
Finished :D
Please review. Any criticism will be appreciated :D
May write another chapter...