So sorry. But not really. FLUFF! and angst. But mostly Fluff. TW: This is literally called 'scars.' Mental and physical here people. Be smart. Not to bad tho.
Also, guess who got to (finally) watch Spiderman-Homecoming?! ME! I know. You don't care...*sigh* Here's the fic:
Ford stared at the mirror in resignation. The tears in his flesh overlapped one another and made him look less human and more alien the closer you looked. His finger traced his neck where the newest scars were forming.
They were slightly different from the others, electrical in origin. Ford's fists clenched at the thought of how they came into existence.
Bill was crueler than Ford gave him credit for.
When it first started, Ford could handle it. He could handle the pain. He'd been through worse. What he couldn't handle were the hallucinations.
The visions of his family trying to save him.
Sometimes the hallucination ended with his family dead. Sometimes they left him there to die.
He was too deformed for acceptance. They saw and they rejected.
When they actually saved him, he thought it was another of Bill's tricks. But he played along, and it paid off.
His family was safe.
They were still none the wiser either. None of them knew about his scars.
Logically, he knew they would be accepting. They wouldn't care.
But years of bullies, even in the portal, made him feel otherwise.
Never show your weaknesses.
Trust no one.
Ford turned away from the mirror with a sigh. He finished reapplying the bandages to his wrists and neck and pulled his sweater back on. That day on the Fearamid, Stan had found out about the scars, and Ford found out about Stan's. Stan seemed so upset. It was the one memory Ford was glad Stan hadn't remembered.
It made Stan sad. Stan wasn't supposed to be sad.
Ford left the basement and walked into the kitchen. The kids greeted him cheerfully. Tough, those kids. Ford thought.
Fetching himself a cup of coffee, Ford went to go check on Stan.
Stan was nowhere to be found.
His heart beat faster as he begged the twins to tell him where Stanley was. They didn't know. They all got up and searched.
Stan was in the basement.
They found him staring at the open first aid kit. Ford's heart skipped a beat.
" Stanley! There you are. We were all so worried." Ford wanted to pull him into a hug. They hadn't hugged properly for forty years. He controlled the urge. He smiled.
Stan told the kids to go upstairs. They left, grumbling. Ford's brow furrowed nervously. " Stanley, what is it?"
Stan's entire body grew tense as he pointed to the bloody bandages in the trash. Ford swallowed. He meant to burn them later. Stan's voice was a mix of anger, concern and a deep sort of regret.
" What is this, Ford?" Stan stepped closer.
Ford stepped back. " It's nothing Stanley. Scratches. That's all." He lied lamely.
Stan smirked. " Oh, really? Mind if I take a look? It's hard, tending these things properly on your own." Stan's hand moved to his shoulder subconsciously. His smirk fell.
Ford's eyes followed the movement. He felt the guilt rip him apart all over again. " I'm sorry about that. Always have been." He whispered.
Stan waved his apology off. " If you're really sorry, you'll tell me what's wrong. These are heavy duty bandaids, Ford." Stan glared. Ford felt his resolve crumbling. He made one last attempt to stop Stan from worrying.
" I've had worse, really," Ford said confidently.
" Wrong choice of words, Sixer." Stan grabbed his wrist. Ford yelled. Stan's brow shot up.
" And what was that exactly, Ford? Just a scratch, right?" Stan gloated, but his eyes showed concern.
Ford glowered. " You wanna see? Fine." Ford forced his sweater off. He glared again but flushed when he saw the barely controlled horror on his twin's face. " Oh-no, Stanley, I'm so-"
" Don't you dare," Stan growled. He forced Ford into a chair. Ford yelped.
" Sorry. Don't move."
Stan left and Ford found himself alone, in his desk chair, nervously awaiting for whatever Stan was about to do. Stan came back in with a box.
" Here," Stan said gruffly, shoving the box at him. Ford examined the contents. They were bandages but seemed off much better quality than the ones he'd been using from his own kit.
Stan dragged another chair over and took the box from him. " These will help them heal faster." He seized Ford's hand and started to unravel the bandages on Ford's wrist. Ford wasn't sure how to feel at the moment. His face still felt warm from the anger and embarrassment from earlier. Stan's face was utter calm.
The work Stan did felt practiced, professional.
" How many times have you done this, Stanley?" Ford asked as Stan moved on to Ford's left wrist.
" It's easier on other people."
Stan's voice was devoid of emotion. Ford felt his heart sink.
" Are you alright, Stanley?" Ford questioned quietly.
Stan shook his head. No. No, he was not okay.
" What's wrong?" Ford begged. He hated being out of the know.
Stan looked him straight in the eyes. " I know what an electric burn looks like Poindexter. These ain't no scratches."
Ford ignored the double negative to see the sentiment behind the words. He felt the blood leave his face. " I'm fine, I'm alive." He tried to comfort. He wasn't very good at it.
Stan sighed. " I want to know these things. You aren't alone." Stan stood up to work on his neck. Ford tensed.
" Relax. Even I couldn't make this worse."
Feeling less soothed and more depressed by Stan's self-deprecating humor, Ford slumped back into the chair. " Don't do that." He started roughly.
Ford could feel Stan's questioning stare. " Do what?" Stan asked, equally gruff.
" Put yourself down. You're my Hero Stanley. Hero's aren't allowed to do that." Ford stated matter-of-factly.
Stan's faced warmed up and he had to delay his reply so his embarrassment didn't show through his voice. " Well, if I'm the Hero, I get to save you. So you can't hide these things anymore. Or something like that."
Ford huffed. " I don't think that's how it works. And you've always been my Hero."
Ford chuckled when Stan didn't answer. He knew he was embarrassing his brother, he could practically feel the emotion rolling off his twin.
" Whatcha laughin' for?"
" Nothing." Ford snickered. Stan tied off the cloth and left without a word. Ford got up to follow him. " Hey, where are you going? Stanley? I was just...teasing..." He trailed off as he ran after Stanley, who went upstairs.
Ford realized his mistake to seconds later.
" WOAH! Dipper look! Grunkle Ford has pink tattoos!"
Ford's face flushed a very, very bright red. He whipped around to glare at Stanley who was snickering in the corner of the room. Dipper walked in and his eyes widened.
" Woah! Did you get all those scars on the other side of the portal, Grunkle Ford?" Mabel laughed.
" Scars. That makes loads more sense! And is even COOLER!" Then Mabel noticed how flushed Ford was and noted the laughing Stan in the corner.
" Hey, it's okay Grunkle Ford!" She pulled up her sweater up to her bellybutton and pointed to a single white line on her stomach. " I've gone one too! When I got my appendix removed!"
The words and the way she said it was a little too much for Ford and he burst out laughing. Laughing for all the pain and fear and regret and how Mabel was able to remove it all with a single sentence and a glowing smile.
He calmed down, the entire family staring at him, hunched over from laughing so hard. He felt his face flush again but smiled. He pulled Mabel into a hug. She squealed with delight.
" Mabel, you are so wonderful." Ford pulled Dipper into the hug too. " And you're so intelligent. More so than I am."
Stanely hung behind them, content and happy seeing his favorite people so content and happy. Ford released the twins from their hug and they left with promises of pillows and movies, talking a little to fast for Ford to properly comprehend. He turned to Stanley who laughed.
" Gotcha good, didn't I?" Stan smirked, self-satisfied for a job well done.
Ford punched him in the arm. " You are such a- I don't even have the words, Ley!" Ford used the old nickname without any conscious thought and Stan covered his shock quickly.
" Yeah, but you were always easy ta dupe weren't ya?" Stan's normally harmless banter brought back painful thoughts, but Ford ignored them. He chuckled.
" Yeah."
They were silent for a moment.
Ford couldn't stop himself.
Stanley grunted as Ford enveloped him in a hug. It took Stan's mind a moment to comprehend what was happening. He returned the hug tenfold when he realized that's what it was.
Stan felt Ford tremble. " I'm so sorry, Stanley. For everything."
Ford clung to him and Stan rubbed soothing circles on his back, ignoring the marred skin and how it made him wanted to run to the other side of that portal and kick whatever had caused them right it the-
anyway. Moving on.
" It's okay, Sixer."
Ford was still trembling. Stan internally groaned for how sappy he was being. " I love ya, Sixer, it's okay."
Ford clutched his shirt in balled fists. He laughed weakly. " I love you too, Stanley. You sap."
This time Stan really did groan. " Okay, enough of that." They released each other and were about to say...something when they turned in mutual horror to the doorway where Dipper and Mabel were clapping.
They both burned brighter than the sun. So much for being the tough, gruff Grunkles.
Dipper and Mabel laughed at the looks of abject embarrassment and led them to the living room, where they had set up an innumerable number of blankets, snacks, and movies.
Mabel informed Ford they had been planning it for awhile, but the apocalypse got in the way. Stan and Ford laughed. Of course, the apocalypse was just a minor inconvenience to these two and their plans.
Dipper forced the Grunkles to sit and Mable came in flourishing something blue like a flag.
" Ta-da! Convenient you're not wearing a sweater, Grunkle Ford because we made you one! So we never have to see your old man flesh ever again! "
" She's kidding Grunkle Ford," Dipper added, to avoid any offense. It was unnecessary, but Ford appreciated it.
Ford ran his fingers over the professional stitches. Ow. Something was in his eye. It was making his eyes water-dangit. He slipped it on over his head and reveled in how soft it was in comparison to his old one.
" Thank you both. But why all the sudden...everything?" Ford looked questioningly to Stan. Stan grimaced.
" I may have accidentally let it slip to Soos when my birthday was and by default, your own. He must have told the twins. The little traitor."
" Dipper! We forgot to say the surprise part!" Mabel whined. Dipper chuckled.
" Let's do it now then." Mabel rolled her eyes.
" That's not right though!"
Stan interceded, " He was plenty surprised, kids. Look at his surprised face! I saw it a mile away though..." He bragged.
Dipper rolled his eyes. " Only because you helped plan it!"
Ford gasped in mock horror. " Stanley, how could you?"
Stan growled, " That was supposed to be a secret ya little gremlin'! C'mhere!" He nuggied Dipper's head playfully. Mabel jumped in to save her brother and Ford joined in. One thought that drowned out all the previous doubts and demons from before.
I trust them with all my heart.
And they trust me.
Just a dumb ficlet on Ford's trust issues. I didn't know how this would end when I started it. So, it's kinda silly and confusing. Hope you liked it though!
Stan: AAAAHHHH! MY EYES! *Dies. No one notices.*
Ford: Why do I blush so much in this fic?
Me: Because the only thing better than SleepXFord is BlushXFord. As in you. As in your adorkable! I saw something scrolling through the internet: Girl's don't want boyfriends, they want Stanford Pines to sleep for 8 consecutive hours.
Idk who wrote that, but...
I thought that was hilarious. Hence the fluff. Even though it had nothing to do with sleeping. Maybe next time...
You people: Carmen?! Why aren't you working on your other fics!?
Me: I wanted to write this, okay? I'll get to it...eventually. (As in like, tomorrow.) Love you guys! Bye-bye. For now.