Disclaimer:

Me: I WILL RULE THE WORLD! STARTING WITH OWNING TWILIGHT!

Alice: Well, you're not going to get very far….

Me: How about the characters?

Alice: I do not see that in your future.

Me: *mumbles* stupid, future-seeing vampire…

Alice: ex-CUSE MEE?

Me: What? I didn't say anything…

Chapter 1

EMPOV

Everyone had gone to hunt so it was just me and Bella left in the house, everyone would be back soon. Me and Bella began to get so bored we invited Mike, Angela, Ben, Jessica, Eric and Lauren around. We were all sitting down and were playing truth or dare. Bella now had to ask Mike if he wanted truth or dare, we sat and waited patiently. After 5 minutes we began to become impatient "So Bella, are you going to ask me? I mean if you don't want to…I don't mind," Mike said smiling, I smacked him at the back of his head. I then heard him mutter.

"If only he knew that hurt more mentally than physically…" I smiled.

"Oh didn't it hurt physically?" I said raising my hand in the perfect position to smack him. Mike shielded his face.

"No what I meant was it hurt more mentally was because it hurt a LITTLE it and I had a headache…so combined that's a lot of hurt…but physically…it was VERY hard but um…yeah it wasn't AS hard…" Mike tried to recover.

"Ohh what's that? Is that the sound of someone digging the hole deeper for themselves?" Bella joked. Mike listened intently.

"THEM DIGGING PEOPLE PROMISED TO BE FINISHED BY YESTERDAY! Well at least I get to see them sexy twenty packs," Mike said, lowering the last sentence.

"What was the end bit Mike?" Eric asked, as Mike said it so low no one could hear. I reached in my pocket and got my megaphone.

"MICHAEL NEWTON SAID AND I QUOTE, WELL AT LEAST I GET TO SEE THEM SEXY TWENTY PACKS" I declared, Mike was now blushing. I then continued "…and as I recall women don't have twenty packs…so I'm thinking-" I was about to say before he interrupted.

"I meant twelve pack of beers…not torso…I'm not gay! And women CAN have twenty packs! I went out with someone that had a six pack!" Mike protested.

"mike the person you went out with was a tranny [A/N transsexual :) no offence if your one :S] …a buff tranny." Eric said.

"Eric you promised you wouldn't tell anyone," Mike whined. Everyone snickered.

"I would but then you slept with my grandma!" He said.

"Duude! How many times I went around the village but I did not enter the village!" Mike hissed, a bit too loud.

"Well it doesn't seem like it because the population of the village has gone up!" Eric debated. Mike's mouth opened wide.

"Damn-" I then interrupted him.

"Mike let's get this straight okay…Your gay and the only women with a pack of any sort is your mum, and that pack is a pack of rolls…." I said. Lauren licked her finger and touched her but making a sizzling noise.

"ooooooh burn!" Bella voiced. Mike looked at Bella.

"WHERE I'll lick it off?" he said desperately. Everyone looked at him.

"Calm down Mike," I said jokingly sticking out my tongue. "So Bella, are you gunna truth Mike?" I asked. Bella then gave me a death glare.

"EMMETT IN. MY. OWN. TIME." She said sternly I then nodded.

"oooh Emmett you got pwned!" Mike shouted. I looked at him.

"Mike you are top on my list of killing people so don't push me…" I warned. There then was a chorus of 'Ditto's' Mike then sat quietly. Bella crawled up to my ear.

"EMMETT!" I jumped from the loudness.

"What dearist Bella?" I said sweetly.

"I'M READY" she screamed. I jumped again. We just sat there silence.

"Okay then…I might need a new hearing aid!" I winced. Bella looked at me.

"No you don't silly you're a va-" she began without thinking…she was obviously still tipsy and sugar high.

"Very Cool person…" I saved. Bella looked at me smiling apologetically. 'Don't worry' I mouthed.

"So Michael-" Bella started Mike interrupted.

"Mike, it sounds more masculine!" Mike demanded.

"Okay so Michael your truth is… Dude, why are you so flipping gay?" She asked.

"I'd rather keep my private life private…" Mike said sincerely.

"Fine okay another truth then why didn't you choose dare? Are you afraid the almighty Bella power will make you look more of an ass?" she said smiling.

"Bella," I whined. "That's a crap truth," I frowned.

"Don't be jealous of Bella's power," bella said staring at me.

"Woah if looks could kill!" Eric muttered.

"If Only" I muttered staring at Mike intently.

"Okay then in all seriousness my truth is, how many times have you had sex?" bella asked. Mike then started counting on his fingers. Lauren reached out and put his hand down.

"Let me save you the time Mike THE ANSWER IS ZERO! Okay? You're a virgin deal. With. It!" She said firmly, everyone burst out laughging.

"Emmett you are too thought right?" Mike said. I nodded, everyone gasped.

"I mean yes I am. If you minus 3million seven thousand and twenty times" I said smiling. Mike then blushed.

Eric then patted Mike's shoulder as Mike placed his head in his hands.

"Ooooh Bella, my little friend is coming out to greet you!" Mike said smiling he then looked up.

"yeah Mike I'm a bit uncomfortable with this so I'm gunna let go…" Eric said letting go. Mike went bright red.

"I announce the beast has been released!" Lauren announced. Mike blushed more. Bella took a peak and was then sick on the floor.

"And that my friends is the cue for you guys to leave."

"NOOOOOOOOOOOO Don't make me go please I beg you! Bella, my love. You love me! Don't care if it's past my bed time," Mike screamed. We all grabbed him and tried to force him out, but he was clinging onto everything.

10 MINUTES LATER…

After Mike begging to stay we finally got him out. It was just me and Bella now.

"So Bella it's 10 oclock, what shall we do?" I asked.

"Umm I'm hungry! Can we go to Walmart?" She asked. I nodded.

"Yeah sure…Oh Wait we can't it's closed because the manager's funeral is today!" I remembered. Bella frowned, but then smiled.

"Well that doesn't mean we can't go inside does it," Bella said winking. "Get ready. WE ARE GOING TO BREAK INTO WALMART!" She screamed. I immediately ran upstairs packing my bags full of high tech stuff, I then changed into a black hat, black jumper and black jeans. I then went downstairs to see Bella exactly the same as how I last saw her.

"Too much?" I asked. She nodded.

"Too much." She answered. I shrugged. I pulled out my walkie talkie and threw it to her. "Okay codenames I'm StrongDynamite and your FlopsyPinkBunny" I said smiling. Bella rolled her eyes but couldn't be bothered to argue, she climbed on my back and we ran off to Walmart. We soon arrived for once the car park was completely empty.

"I'll text Edward and the others to meet us in here when they get home." I said, getting my phone out.

Dear, Edweird, Pixie, Jazzy, Rosiepoo

After your hunting trip come down to Walmart :) Sneak in, we're gunna have some fuuun :) it's time for the cullens and Bella to go on a unsupervised trip to Walmart x

"Okay it's sent, I'll go ahead and you can follow my lead." I said. I then ran ahead, climbed to the roof on the way up I heard Bella mutter 'Screw this' I carried on.

"Every man to himself," I reminded myself I soon reached the top. I attached my harness and slowly lowered down until I reached the floor. I wiped a piece of imaginary sweat off my face.

"Phew. Okay Bella you can come down now " I shouted there was no reply. I was then tapped on the shoulder, I turned around with my hands in the air.

"It wasn't my idea! I just wanted some bread! I know your shut but I need bread is that a crime?" I said falling to my knees, I was tapped again, I didn't look up, I was then slapped. "hey I could get you done for that!" I said as I looked up, I then realised it was Bella.

"hey" she said smiling eating a tortilla wrap. "early breakfast" she said smiling.

"how did you get in?" I asked trying to work it out.

"Back door was unlocked." She said smiling.

"So all of THIS," I said circling around the harnesses and high tech equipment, "Was for nothing" I said, she nodded.

"Yep" So let's just have some fun!"

Ohh let's go on the water slide pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeee" I begged. She then ran off to that direction.

"Already ahead of you." She screamed. Just as we nearly reached the aisle a person appeared. Damn.

"BELLA!" The person shouted.

The person Was Michael fucking Newton.

Hope you like the idea of this story, it's literally gunna be the cullens Bella, Mike and maybe others in later chapters and there gunna trash walmart and have some fun :)

Thanks for reading