Author's Notes: Ya… I haven't been writing much lately. This means I'm in The Mood. Interpretation: Angst time! This isn't really heavy angst – It's just mild, actually. But consider this – Shinji's perspective. Yayness!

Disclaimers: TeniPuri won't be mine. It's Konomi-sensei's. He better make it yaoi…

If I Speak Slowly

There's a story I want to tell you.

No, this is not some sort of bedtime story. It's actually far from that. Or perhaps it could qualify as one. Or not. I'm just the story-teller, so don't ask me. Or maybe you could. I don't know. Who knows?

Okay. I'll cut the crap.

I had this friend of mine who is still a friend of mine, much to my dismay who, unexpectedly, fell in love with someone from "The Other Side", as we called it. This, of course, surprised me, and it still kind of makes me laugh. I don't know why. I guess I never would. But who cares?

I do.

So that pretty much makes me an indecisive freak, doesn't it? Not that it's something new or something untrue. I guess I could say that I am, when I'm partly bewildered and still half-asleep, that is. Or maybe not.

Okay. I'm straying from subject.

As I was saying, there was this friend of mine I will not mention his name, I swear. who fell in love with someone from Seigaku. Oops. I slipped. He's so going to kill me for this. You will not tell anyone, promise me that! Come on, right hand up. Okay. Good. Now put that down. You look stupid.

So this friend of mine got together with that someone from Seigaku. I never guessed or figured why, and I guess I do have the ability to do so. Given the time, I'd at least try to think about it. I never even gave it a try, so I guess me not being able to understand how Akira got together with that Snake guy is reasonable.

Oh great. I slipped again.

Remind me to kill you after this, okay?

Yes. Do nod. That's good.

But why are you telling me this?

I wouldn't know. It's to relieve of the sadness, I guess. I've been feeling this stabbing pain in my chest, right here. Yes, somewhere near my heart. Do you think I'll die right now?

Why would you? You're just watching them talk animatedly. Does it affect you much?

Well, I wouldn't know. I told you, I'm just the story-teller. Maybe I am. I mean, I don't normally feel this way. I'm just looking at them. I'm just seeing them be semi-sweet, that's all. I've been feeling like this lately. Do you think it's fatal?

Perhaps, if you continue doing this. Can't stand watching them, ne?

You're making me laugh. Well, I guess you're right. I'll kill myself this way. I still need to beat Echizen-kun. He promised me a match. Good thing you said that. I guess I've always needed someone to talk to.

No problem. This is just weird, you know, you talking to me.

I don' t mind.

So do I.

"Hey Shinji! Care to pair up with Momoshiro against Kaoru and I?"

I was snapped out of reverie. I lifted my head to meet Akira's eyes, staring inquisitively at me.

"You fell asleep?"

I shook my head. I then stood from the bench, picked my racket up, and tapped Momoshiro's shoulder lightly. "So you're ready to be defeated? I wouldn't really need Momoshiro, you know that. I could beat you two. But I guess you're belittling me again. I'm not surprised though. You always do. But anyway, I'll have a match with you. Momoshiro, you take the front. I'll be right behind you. You can let me take all the shots, I wouldn't really mind-"

"Shinji…"

I wanted to smile at the tone he used. He sounded so exasperated.

But, I thought, I didn't smile. If I did, he'd make a big fuss about it. He'd ask me who made me smile, or why I was smiling. And if I told him it was him, he wouldn't believe me.

Which brought me to the realization I should just shut up and play. I'd still be able to watch him anyway. It'd be the same, only that he's across the court and not behind or in front of me.

I guess fools only talk to themselves.

After all, fools are still human. They have needs, desires, wants. They have dimensions. They could love as well.

That counts the mumblers, right?

I guess.

So you're telling that I love Akira?

I didn't say anything. You're the one who said that.

Crap. Slipped.

I guess mumblers like me qualify in the fools category.

I don't really mind.

And that's something I'm sure of.

749 words + 6:33p + 28 August 2005