AN:
Chi: Hi, everysmurf! I'm Chisette, SmurfyFriend's OC!
Aiko: I think you guys already know me. But I'm Aiko, the insane, vicious one. I belong to YinYangofthePeaceCircle.
Chi: We, that is to say, Smurfy and YinYang, did a roleplay about Vanity and Farmer, or, as I call it, Vanarmer.
Aiko: I call it Farmity, but whatever.
Chi:…Any who, YinYang is making this a story. So read and review!
Aiko: Just so everysmurf knows, Kenzie, Sadie, and Janice, along with the wolves, won't appear here. Just me. So in case you guys get confused, they apparently don't exist. Or maybe they do, I have no idea.
Chi: Yuppers. Also, the Dreamy, Alchemist, Flier, Tracker, HeftyXSmurfette, Baby, and HandyXSmurfette(presumably) are going strong in this RP! If you don't know what we mean, read Smurfy's fics on FanFiction and The Smurfs: The Chisette Chronicles on DeviantART.
Aiko: Mmhmm. Smurfy's name there is dragonmastrcrashrokz. And YinYang is Riverthunder, if anyone's wondering.
Chi: This is getting to be a bit long, let's get on with the RP already!
Aiko: Okay, okay! Just so everysmurf is clear, SmufyFriend owns this too! So go tell her what you think of this, of Chi, whatever. YinYang doesn't own everything! Except the idea that something needed to happen to Vanity so Farmer was guilt tripping for once, but…ya know. On with the RP, entitled:
Perfection
Chapter One:
Friendship and Felines
It was morning in the Smurf Village. Early morning at that. Most of the Smurfs were still sleeping in their mushroom-shaped houses. Including two Smurfs in particular: Vanity and Farmer. They slept in their shared bed, Farmer's arm around the smaller Smurf, without a care in the world. Until the alarm clock went off, that is.
Vanity stretched his arms up over his head, yawning. a bit as dawn crept sneakily into the mushroom. "
Farmer, dear, do you have to turn that thing up so loud?" The narcissist complained. "The morning is evil." Farmer groggily swatted at the ringing alarm clock, turning it off, and brought his arm around Vanity again, yawning widely. "'Good mornin' t'you too,'" he said drowsily, "You know me, shug. Ah'd sleep through a Garg'mel attack if he din' step right on top'a me."
"It's true," Vanity teased, snuggling closer to Farmer. "Sleep through anything, that's you."
Farmer held Vanity close, enjoying his sweet, almost citrusy scent. After a moment or two he let out a little sigh. "Mmmm... Ah love you, shugah." he murmured.
"So, who are you working with today, honey?" asked Vanity, breathing in Farmer's musky scent with a small smile playing around his lips. He was so busy drinking in his mate's scent he almost didn't hear the answer.
Farmer ran his fingernail lightly up and down Vanity's arm. "Hmmm... Don' remember..." he said, "Ah guess Ah'll find out when Ah get to th' fields." he chuckled a little.
Truth be told, he DID know. But he felt resentful enough about having to work with him, even if he was sorta forced by Papa. He thought Vanity would flip if he knew Farmer was working with Tracker today.
"Mmm." mumbled Vanity, pressing his face into Farmer's chest. "Guess we hafta get up, then..."
He really didn't want to. It was so peaceful, lying here with his Smurf, with no worries...
"Yeah, guess so, shug." Farmer begrudgingly admitted, planting a kiss on his mate's forehead. "Cain't jus' lay here all day, much's Ah'd like to."
He was really enjoying this time with Vanity. But he had to go get a jump on harvesting the crops before it got too hot outside. After a little squeeze, Farmer started getting out on his side of the bed, and looking for a clean pair of overalls.
Vanity groaned. "I have to go gather herbs with Aiko and Brainy...I'll never survive."
He finally tore himself away from his mate, dragging himself out of bed. "Papa's two apprentices, in one place, arguing...my complexion can't smurf it, darling!"
Farmer chuckled a little. "Jus' think how Papa feels. He deals wit'em all day."
He found a clean pair of overalls and started putting them on.
"How he survives...maybe it's because Aiko specializes in spells and Brainy is usually blowing the roof off his mushroom with those concoctions he calls 'potions'." Vanity snickered.
He pulled on a clean pair of pants and then grabbed his hat with the flower on it. "And Aiko actually has some idea of what she's doing. And she listens, whereas Brainy just charges forward."
Farmer nodded a little and clipped his overalls, then grabbed his straw hat off the rack, "True... Bu' with that temper'a hers, she's 'bout as dangerous as Brainy's 'potions' some days!" he said with a small chuckle.
He stretched his stiff neck and muttered something about needing a better pillow. "Jus' tune 'em out, an' it'll be a lot less of a headache..." he said.
"Oh, I more than agree, darling," Vanity nodded. "I hardly smurfed a wink...look at these circles!" he moaned, dabbing concealor around his eyes.
"Well," he smiled, once he'd finished his beautifying, "better head to breakfast. Aiko, Chi, Smurfette and the others will be waiting for us..."
Farmer smiled a little, then tilted Vanity's face up towards his and kissed his lips lightly. "We prolly shou'... C'mon."
He offered his arm the way an escort would and stood at their bedroom door.
When they arrived at the Mess Hall, Aiko looked up. Her blond streaked hair cut in an A line bounced slightly . Her icy blue eyes sparkled. "Here they come," she smiled, nuzzling into Gutsy's side.
"'Bout time," joked her Scottish mate. "You've been smurfin' on about how ya need ta talk wit' Vanity, an' now ya can. Maybe the rest of us will git a bit'o peace now, Lassie."
"Smurf up, ravu," muttered Aiko from where her face was buried in his sash. "I was under the impression you liked your tongue where it was. If I was mistaken..." s trailed off, letting the threat hang in the air.
Gutsy cleared his throat.
Farmer stepped into the chow line, getting a second plate so Vanity could go get them seats. Chi found an open seat next to Hefty and sort of catty-corner to Aiko and smiled at her. "Mornin', Aiko. Mornin' Guts. How's the happy couple this morning?" she said, good humor in her voice.
"Just smurfy," smirked Aiko. "Except he's got a knack for smurfing the wrong thing at the wrong time."
"They do that, darling," Vanity sighed as he took his seat. "They can be downright dreadful at times. Just remember why you said 'yes' and have that rock on your finger."
"Let me see," said Smurfette. "I haven't seen it since the wedding!"
Aiko smiled pleasantly as she held out one hand. Her talon-like nails shined in the dimmer light of the Mess Hall, but the bright, light blue of the sapphire gleamed brightly. Smaller, less noticeable rubies danced around the larger gem. The silver ring connected to her wedding band, which had the inscription 'Forever in My Heart and Soul'.
"I still say it was overkill..." Aiko murmured, nuzzling Gutsy's chin with her head.
"An' I say yea deserve it," Gutsy retorted, kissing her hair.
"Ah," sighed Vanity dreamily. "Young love..."
Chi cracked and popped her knuckles out of nervous habit. "Oy, bubbeleh, overkill or not, you're braver than I am," she admitted, "I've never even been in a relationship for more than a year. I'm scared to death to get married!"
Farmer got his and Vanity's food and sat next to his mate.
Aiko nuzzled Gutsy's chin again. "Aw, when ya find your soulmate you won't hesitate, Chi. I guarantee it."
As Smurfette turned to Chi, Aiko turned to Vanity. "Sorry again about herb duty."
"No worries," Vanity replied nonchalantly, waving an airy hand.
"It's just, if I have to spend the day with Smarty Smurf alone, I'll go mad."
"I hear you loud and clear, darling," Vanity nodded.
"Vanity!" Yelled Gutsy suddenly, look out!"
But too late. The vain Smurf was dripping wet, covered in smurfberry juice.
Aiko's ice eyes flashed a fiery ice color. "TRACKER!" she shrieked, standing up so fast she was a blur. Her hands crackled with blue electricity, sparking threateningly.
Papa Smurf was moving forward. Noticing this, Gutsy gently wrapped an arm around her thin waist. "Papa'll handle it, lassie."Gutsy soothed. "Calm down."
"Promise me you'll accidentally on purpose hit him during the harvest." She was relieving her feelings by making a rude hand gesture in Tracker's direction with one hand and using a Cleaning Spell on Vanity with the other.
"Tanks," Vanity stuttered, obviously still in shock.
"No problem," Aiko replied.
"Don't let 'im get on yer nerves, lass," Gutsy murmured sagely. He gently rubbed her arm.
Her sleeves were rolled up for summer, and some of the angry red scars she and her mother had made were visible. "I hate smurfstards like him," snarled Aiko. "They remind me of my parents."
"A feier zol im trefen!*"Chi muttered Yiddish poisonously, INCREDIBLY tempted to flip him the smurf's version of the bird.
Farmer had an arm around Vanity, rubbing his back in small circles and speaking quiet, comforting words. "Feh!" Chi continued, "At least Hefty's takin' my place today, and I'll be with you guys," she looked at Vanity and Aiko, "Then You and Hef can teach that chamoole**a lesson out in the fields, Farmer."
Farmer tensed up and looked at the ground, simply waiting for "Hurricane Vanity".
"And then he was gone," Aiko declared ominously. "Gutsy, I'll handle that bit, you just make sure nosmurf's watching."
Vanity suddenly flipped out. "SMURF UP!" He screeched, glaring at them. "JUST SMURF UP, WHY DON'T YOU?"
Aiko surveyed him closely over her glasses. "Temper, temper," she chided, blue eyes sparkling with amusement. "Anysmurf would think you were trying to pick a fight, Vanity dear."
"Well, maybe I am," Vanity growled.
"Really wanna play this game, Vanity?" Aiko asked, a taunting note in her voice. Vanity would have to be insane to try and fight her, physically or verbally.
"I…I…I…." Vanity searched for a comeback, finally snapping, "At least I'm not as blind as a bat without a few shards of glass!"
"Ooo, low blow," Aiko smirked.
Chi suddenly got the sinking feeling she had said something she shouldn'tve.
Farmer turned his mate towards him. "Van'ty, calm down,"he said, "He's workin' in th' fields t'day. it's not like he's comin' over f' wine."
"Sorry," mumbled Vanity. "I guess my patience was smurfed."
"Happens to the best of us," drawled Aiko. "Oh smurf," she added. "Finish your meal fast. Geeky Smurf approacheth from the yonder."
Aiko, Chi, Vanity and Brainy finished their breakfasts, and had adjourned to the forest to go pick roots. Aiko and Brainy clashed, as they always seem to, and Vanity and Chi just conversed privately, ignoring the apprentices bickering. "So, how HAS your relationship been, bubbeleh?" Chi said, picking more roots, "You 'n Farmer are so close... how on smurf do you do it?"
"It's not always easy," Vanity admitted thoughtfully. "Sometimes we fight. Ad I swear, sometimes we must sound like those two."
They paused long enough to hear Aiko shriek, "BRAINY, ONE MORE SOUND OUT OF YOUR MOUTH INVOLVING MY WEDDING, RECEPTION, RING, HONEYMOON, OR GUTSY'S DESCION TOMAKE GROUCBY THE BESST MAN, I SWEAR, I WILL SMURF YOU INTO CATFOOD AND FEED YOU TO AZRAEL!"
"Not always a completely smurfy couple," Vanity concluded. "Part of it is knowing when to admit you were wrong or crossed a line."
Chi chuckled listening to Aiko scream at Brainy. "Heh heh... that right there's me and Hefty on a regular basis." She shook her head and laughed. "Ever have days when Farmer just kinda- bugs you?" she shrugged again, "I can't tell with you guys sometimes!"
"Of course! I love him to death, dear, but sometimes he's so underfoot! If we need some time alone, though, he lets me have my space. Communication, darling."
He paused "Ya know, Aiko and Gutsy are like that too. If she needs her space she just heads for that tree hollow and spends the night there."
"But don't ask me how she manages because I honestly don't know. I'm sure. The mosquitoes must suck away at her complexion."
"SMURFIT! BRAINY, I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO SAY NOT TO BUG E WHILE I'M DOING MAGIC?"
"Sorry, Aiko!" Brainy scuttled into view then, quelling under Aiko's fiery gaze.
"A SIMPLE DIGGING SPELL! A DIGGING SPELL, BRAINY! NOW LOOK AT ME!"
Vanity smiled slightly but did not speak.
"I'M SMURFIN' PINK!" She wailed.
Chi stared for a minute, trying REALLY hard not to laugh or smile. Unsuccessfully, of course. she chuckled a little. slowly but surely, her chuckle developed into a full Jokey-Style belly laugh, despite the poisonous glare from Aiko. Little did she know, her loud laugh was signaling a very... UNWANTED set of visitors...
The pure-pink Aiko was about to pounce on Chi when she looked up. Gargamel and Azrael were RIGHT ABOVE HER.
She tried to scream, but her throat wouldn't work. She gave up and turned tail, racing for a tree. Brainy sprinted after her. In his eyes, better stuck in an oak with a pink murderous Aiko than on the ground with a half-mad wizard and Smurf-hungry Abyssinian tabby cat.
Chi must have picked up on Aiko's panic or seen the pair herself. Either way, she was gone as well. The only Smurf left was Vanity...
...Who seemed frozen with shock.
"Vanity!" screamed Brainy. "Are you surfing insane? Run!"
Vanity seemed to begin to gather his bearings, but Azrael needed no such preparation.
He leaped, claws extended, teeth bared. He landed on top of Vanity, claws piercing his blue skin. Vanity yelped in pain as the cat's claws began to rake and tear his back, sides, and face, the yellow eyes burning with malice.
Chi clapped her hands over her mouth, so as not to scream, tears of horror filling her eyes. She watched helplessly from the perch on the oak tree as her best friend was nearly ripped to pieces and batted around by the hungry cat.
Eventually, Gargamel shooed his feline companion away from his prey."Get away, Azrael!" he growled at the cat, "The little blue bumpkin might just bleed to death before we can cook it!"
Chi, Brainy and Aiko watched in horror as a helpless Vanity was dropped carelessly into a little woven fishing knapsack and taken away. Without a moment's hesitation, Chi started climbing back down the tree and ran towards the village, quickly getting tired. Farmer's fields were the first thing they saw, along with Gutsy, Hefty, Farmer and Tracker planting and picking crops. Farmer looked up at them, noticing his mate wasn't with them... And that Aiko was pink... he shook that thought for the moment, and focused his attention on the struggling to breathe Chi. He took her hand and eased her onto a nearby stump."Chi! Shugah, ya shouldn' be runnin' like tha'... But- Where's Van'ty?"
Chi tried to answer, but was completely out of breath, due to the baby.
"Vanity's hurt!" Aiko choked out. "Gargamel has him. And Tracker," she added, seeing him smiling stupidly at her pink form, "say one smurfin' and I'll kill you!"
Tracker put up his hands defensively, that stupid, smug smile on his face. Hefty and Gutsy soon joined them, Hefty going over to Chi and making sure she was okay. Farmer's face nearly turned white and his heart dropped into his stomach. the slightly overripe tomato he had in his hand dropped to the ground. Vanity's hurt... the words stabbed him right in the chest. Without a word, he quickly started running out towards the forest. The others followed him, and Chi looked up and groaned. "SMURFIT... More RUNNING!" she moaned, but soon followed right after.
Aiko tore after them. " FARMER, WOULD YOU SLOW THE SMURF DOWN SO I CAN SAY SOMETHING?" she yelled as Gutsy tried to catch up.
"SERIOUSLY, PUT YOUR SMURF IN PARK!" Aiko screeched.
Farmer kept running, not slowing down for an instant, not looking back to them. He'd PROMISED Vanity he would protect him. from Tracker, from Gargamel- ANYONE, and anything. Knowing his mate was hurt was bad enough. But hurt, AND that smurfing wizard got his hands on him? Farmer leapt over a fallen log and quickened his pace.
"HELLO, SPRINTER SMURF! INTERESTED IN A SHORTCUT?"
Farmer started to slow down, feeling the beginnings of a side-stitch in his gut. "Orright..." he panted, "Whady'a got in mind, shug...?"
"Simple," replied Aiko. "Turn left here, head to the Owl Rock, smurf a left by the poison ivy patch, cross the brook and take a right to Gargamel's."
"How do ye know that?" asked Gutsy, awed.
"Because Gargamel gets YOU on a weekly basis," she replied, flicking his nose."
Farmer cracked a slight smile for half a second, then ran the path she mentioned. the rescue party quickly reached the bog, and the lopsided hovel that laid in the center of it. The Smurfs climbed up to the window, searching for a sign of their friend. Gargamel stood in the corner, peering into a woven fish basket. "This won't do us any good!" Gargamel scowled, "the miserable little thing's unconscious. we need it AWAKE to make gold!"
Azrael mewled and growled in reply. Gargamel grumbled, and then carelessly dropped a broken and bleeding Vanity into a small glass beaker. "We'll just keep it in here until it wakes up," he muttered, then capped the glass vial. "In the meantime, I'm going to find that blasted alchemy recipe!"
"Alright, first thing's first. Someone needs to distract the cat." Aiko briefed, tugging at her hair. And still looking ridiculously pink.
"Ah'll do it," Gutsy offered enthusiastically.
"Great, good, be careful. Brainy, Chi, you guys deal with Gargamel. If he can get Azrael out of commission he'll come help you, but don't bet on it. Farmer, I'll need you to help me get Vanity. I'll smurf you the rest of that when the others have those two distracted. Everybody got it?"
"Yep! Yep!" Chi nodded, cracking her knuckles. "let's gidd'er done!"
Gutsy, Brainy and Chi lept over the gap between the table and the windowsill and distracted their respective targets. Farmer started scaling the bookshelf ahead of Aiko. He HAD to get to Vanity. he just HAD to. "Almos' there..." he breathed, reaching for the next shelf.
Gutsy had distracted Azreal right into the unsteady bookshelf, making the whole shelf shake precariously. Farmer and Aiko gripped the shelves as the unit shook. The beaker on top shook with it, wobbling close to the edge, until it finally started falling...
Aiko threw out a hand; obviously she was hoping to catch Vanity before he fell past her. But too late- Vanity's glass prison lay shattered around his broken body.
Aiko leaped off the shelf as Farmer let out a strangled cry.
She did not notice the glass cutting deep into her palms, knees, or any part of her, really. She felt the bite as they gouged mercilessly into her, but she ignored it.
Farmer came up behind her as she reached Vanity. He made a noise like a sob, but Aiko shooed him away. She began checking Vanity's vitals. Finally, she said, "He's alive. But only just."
Meanwhile, Azrael was apparently doused in an anti-gravity potion and was stalking around on the ceiling. Gargamel was out cold, covered in rope.
"Brainy! Come help me!" Aiko demanded.
The bespectacled Smurf hurried to obey. "We need him on a stable surface...how much would Feathers jostle him, d'you think?"
Gutsy and Chi were picking their way over. "Don' worreh, Farmer," Gutsy consoled. "Aiko's not gonna let 'im go witout a lotta fight, from 'er and 'im."
The farmhand Smurf almost didn't hear him. Farmer felt his hands trembling. he almost fell to his knees, moving pieces of glass away from his lover's body. in the flurry of activity, Farmer took hold of Vanity's hand and squeezed for all his worth, pressing the back of his hand to his cheek, using it to wipe away tears. In the flourish of activity, somesmurf had gone to call for Feathers. "Farmer," Chi said, her voice broken in fear, "W-we have to get him to Papa Smurf's..."
Farmer gently moved more glass from Vanity's body and gently picked the battered Smurf up in his arms. he quickly, and carefully carried him to the large bird, the others close behind.
"Farmer," Aiko instructed, "you need to make sure Vanity doesn't fall, but don't hold him too tightly. He's definately got some broken bones."
Brainy had told Feathers to take them to the village and to keep the ride gentle. Now she spread her wings to take off.
Gutsy glanced at his horridly pink mate. Aiko didn't seem to notice her injuries. That was good. He knew when she saw them she would have a panic attack. Every time something like this happened, Aiko remembered the horrible wounds her parents had made and became incoherent. He would rather have her panic on solid ground rather than in the air.
Farmer did as instructed, holding his beloved close, picking little shards of glass from his face, and caressing his bloody cheek. He'd let this happen to Vanity on HIS watch... This was HIS fault! his tears didn't stop flowing. he held his face close to Vanity's almost rocking a little. "Y-you're gon' be okay now, shugah...Y-you're gon' be okay... P-please be okay..."
Soon enough, they reached the village. Feathers let them down gently and nudged them towards Papa's house with her beak. Farmer burst through the door, not even bothering to knock. "Pa' Smurf! Pa' Smurf!" he shouted, barely coherent through his tears, "V-Van'ty's hurt! P-Please help us!"
Papa looked up from his potions mixing and recoiled in shock. "Oh my smurfness!" he exclaimed, "Quickly, set him on this table."
Farmer gently laid his mate down on a cleared table, still sobbing and holding his hand tight. Papa quickly examined him, checking his vitals. "His heartbeat's very weak... He's lost a lot of blood... he's going to need a blood transmurfsion."
"O negative..."Farmer said hurriedly, "V-Van'ty's O negative."
Papa thought for a moment. "Hmm... a vey RARE blood type..." he muttered, then turned to Aiko and Brainy. "Aiko, Brainy, check though my medical records books, find somesmurf with O negative that can donate blood."
Aiko paused. "Gutsy? Isn't that YOUR blood type?"
"Yes," Gutsy nodded.
"Hmph," Brainy sniffed. "Papa said to check his records, Aiko."
"This saves precious time, Brainy."
Papa turned. "Would you two stop bickering-Aiko?"
"Hmm?"
Papa had just noticed his female apprentice's wounds. "What happened to you? Are you alright?"
She looked down. Aiko stared at her arms and hands. Her eyes widened as horrible memories filled her mind of her mother cutting her arms and legs in an attempt to kill her.
It was clear Aiko would not be of much help for awhile. Papa turned to Brainy. "Double-check Gutsy's blood type. If its the same as Vanity's, I'll take over and you can make Aiko a potion. No shortcuts. If it's not the same, search the records. Gutsy, you can help with that bit."
"Of course, Papa Smurf," Gutsy agreed quickly.
Meanwhile, Aiko had sunk to her knees and was mumbling quietly, her eyes still wide, shocked, and frightened.
Papa wanted to help her, but at the same time he was sure she'd agree Vanity needed attention first.
Papa was almost ready to go and console Aiko, but Chi thankfully stepped in. She sat next to Aiko and held her almost the way a mother would. "Shh... Shh... It's alright, bubbeleh... I'm right here... I won't let anysmurf hurt you..."She cooed softly, rocking and rubbing her shoulder gently.
Papa silently thanked Chisette, and returned to tending to Vanity's wounds. most of the scratches were not TOO deep, but there was one particular area on Vanity's lower back that particularly concerned him. he eased the broken smurf slightly on his side to examine them, and felt his heart sink as he realized the direness of the situation...
"This isn't good..." muttered Papa.
"Um, Papa Smurf? Gutsy's got Vanity's blood type."
"Good, good, start mixing the potion for Aiko. It'll take about half an hour, but I forbid you to use any shortcuts you might think of!"
Somewhere in the back of her head, Aiko could her all of this going on, but she didn't make any move to show she could comprehend the situation.
Gutsy stepped forward. "What' d'yeh need, Papa?"
"Sit here, Gutsy." Papa instructed, returning to his medical cabinet to gather supplies.
He wrapped a blood pressure cuff around Gutsy's arm and pumped it so it was good and tight. Then he gave the Scottish Smurf a ball to squeeze to keep blood circulating. He jiggled a needle into Gutsy's veins and taped it in place. "Farmer, see if you can clean some of the blood away," Papa said gently, "this should be ready in about twenty minutes."
Farmer took a wet rag and started cleaning Vanity's bloody face, guilt dominating his expression.
"Farmer," said Gutsy, turning to him, "yeh do know this is tha mangy cat's fault, not yers, don't yeh?"
He, unlike most Smurfs, was perfectly fine as Papa began to draw blood.
Just then Brainy leaned over. "Papa Smurf, if I were to double the nectar dosage, shouldn't the potion-"
"Brainy, I forbid you to take shortcuts," Papa cut him off.
"If yeh think I'll let yeh get away wit' it, yer sorely mistaken, smurf fer brains," Gutsy added, a snarl in his voice as he glanced protectively at his mate.
Farmer shook his head, his breath jagged. "N-no, shugah... I-it's MAI fault... If Ahd'a been there jus' a secon' sooner, he wouldn' a lost so much blood..." he said, cleaning the glass wounds on Vanity's arm, "Ah PROMISED him Ah'd protect'm... NOW look at m' Van'ty!" he felt his words melt into sobs and he shakily pressed his mate's hand to his cheek.
"Look, tha' stupid cat's the one who clawed him up. An' it was my fault he fell off the bookcase. But let's face it- blamin' ourselves isn't helpin' 'im any, is it? Vanity's stronger than he looks, he'll make it."
Farmer nodded slightly, still feeling incredibly guilty. No matter WHAT Gutsy said, it was ultimately his fault for not being able to save him sooner... In less than the time mentioned, Papa had drawn all the blood Vanity needed and used a separation spell to separate the plasma from the red blood cells. He hung the bag up near Vanity and hooked him up to it with a new needle. As he started tending to Vanity's lesser wounds, he looked over to Brainy. "How's the potion smurfing, Brainy?"
"It's almost ready. Though in my personal, professional opinion, adding more nectar-"
"Brainy, please tell me you did not try to take any shortcuts."
"No, Papa Smurf, I didn't."
"Good. It should be ready in five minutes."
Gutsy looked at Aiko, still curled in the corner, clutching at her hair.
"Why is she pink?" asked Papa, noticing this for the first time.
Chi suppressed a wide smile, still rocking Aiko and prying her hands from her hair, "Heh, heh... Brainy was messin' with her while she cast a digging spell... heh, heh..."
Papa chuckled a little bit, turning back around to wrap one of Vanity's wounds."Ah, that makes sense then."
His face became somber again. he looked to Chi and Gutsy, who appeared to be the calmest in the room at the time. "Chisette, Gutsy, I'd like to speak with you in private, please."
Brainy had finished the potion, and Gutsy recovered from his light- headedness, so they were now free. Papa led them upstairs, so they could talk in private. "I wasn't going to say this yet," Papa said, voice hushed, "But since you two are the most level-headed at the moment, I thought I ought to tell you first."
"Tell us what, Papa?" Chi asked, feeling a sinking feeling in her chest.
Papa looked at her straight in the eyes. "His lower vertebrae are broken," he said gravely, "and the cat scratch may have partially severed some of the nerves in his back... Vanity Smurf... may be paralyzed from the waist down for the rest of his life. And that's saying he DOES survive this."
Gutsy was desperately searching for a solution. "What about that healing spell Aiko was learning from Homnibus? Could that help him?"
Papa shook his head. "No... magic would only do the nerves further damage. The only option is surgery, and risky surgery at that. If it's unsuccessful, there will be no way to reverse the paralysis."
Just then, they heard Aiko. "Brainy, why the Smurf am I STILL pink?"
Brainy was spluttering indignately.
"Forget it, don't you DARE come near me."
"Well," said Gutsy quietly, "I'm sure he could have been much worse, right? It's probably lucky Aiko'd found a shortcut to Gargamel's, right?"
Papa nodded, a small, sad smile on his face. "Yes... Had you been another 15 minutes, he likely would've bled out right there."
As yells from Brainy and Aiko echoed up the stairs, Papa shook his head and chuckled slightly. "I suppose we ought to smurf them the news as well...Gutsy, would you mind talking to Farmer for me? I have the feeling he'd listen to you better."
"Of course, Papa," Gutsy murmured solemnly.
They walked slowly back down the stairs. Brainy's hat was smoking, tiny wisps of blue flame dancing around it.
Aiko turned to Gutsy, but he shook his head slightly. She nodded and turned to Papa who said, "Come on, Aiko, let's deal with those cuts and make you blue again."
Gutsy turned to Farmer. "Can I talk to yeh? In private?"
The farmhand nodded and stood shakily. Gutsy turned and led him upstairs, back to the room where he'd learned about Vanity's injury. "Sit," Gutsy offered, and Farmer did so, still saying nothing.
"Farmer," Gutsy sighed, "there's no easy way ta say this, so I'm just gonna spit it out. It looks like Vanity's lower back is broken. It also seems that Azrael's claws damaged some nerves. His only option is surgery, and it's risky. If it goes wrong, he'll be paralyzed." He paused, waiting for a reaction.
"Farmer?"
Farmer sat there, honestly dazed. it didn't seem REAL... Vanity... could be paralyzed... and he'd let it happen on his watch... Farmer brought his knees to his chest, and hid his face, his heart heavy in his chest. "I-it's my fault..." he murmured quietly, still processing the terrible news "Ah should'a been there sooner... I-it shoulda been me...Not Van'ty...Oh-oh God-" his voice caught in his chest.
Gutsy stood awkwardly next to Farmer, trying to console him.
Darkness has a way of coercing one into their own destruction... he mused silently.
Farmer continued to blame himself, ignoring Gutsy's protests and claims of the former's innocence.
The creak of stairs and wood signaled someone's appearance. There was a light knock on the door, and it opened with a quiet creak. Chi stood in the doorway. "Farmer," she said, a tinge of relief in her voice, "Vanity's waking up..."
Farmer looked up and absentmindedly and, as if on autopilot, silently stood and hurried down the stairs to his lover's side. Chi walked with Gutsy down the stairs. "How'd he take it?"
Gutsy sighed. "Probably better than I would've taken it if Aiko were the one facing paralysis," Gutsy growled darkly. "When I smurf my hands on Gargamel and 'is flea-ridden cat-"
"I'll be saving you. Again." They looked up to see Aiko watching him. " Calm down, Ravu, he'll be fine. He's not gonna smurf outta here if I've got anything to say about it."
She turned and led them downstairs, her icy eyes watching Vanity as soon as he came in sight. The vain Smurf's eyes fluttered as Farmer sat next to him, clutching one scratched hand.
Aiko looked almost catlike in the corner as she watched Vanity behind her silver glasses.
Gutsy walked over to her and wrapped his arms around her waist. "Forever and always," he muttered, and she smirked slightly.
"In my heart and soul." But then she seemed to remember Vanity's injuries and the smirk vanished. She immediately adopted the expression of a person who was standing at the deathbed of a very close friend. With a jolt, she realized... she might be.
Farmer felt his heart flutter with relief as he watched Vanity's eyelids slowly start to open. "V-Van'ty...?" Farmer's voice was almost reduced to a half whisper, "Van'ty... If ya can hear me, PLEASE jus'... jus' say somethin...ANYTHIN'..."
"Ow," muttered the vain one, even though he had enough painkillers in him to sedate Aiko.
Farmer chuckled almost deliously in relief and tears slipped down his face as he kissed Vanity's scratched up hand again and again. "Tha'll do, shugah... Tha'll do..." he almost whispered.
Papa stepped forward, "Welcome back, my little smurf," he said, a small smile on his face, "you scared us."
Papa turned around and picked a reflex hammer from his medical bag. "Vanity," he said, a solemn look on his face as he approached the table again, near the VERY well sedated smurf's lower body, "I need to know, can you feel this?"
He used the handle of the hammer to swipe lightly over one of Vanity's revealed feet, and held his breath.
"Barely," Vanity mumbled. "Smurfit, what did you give me?"
Papa breathed a small sigh of relief. "Just a few painkillers, Vanity." he said, "How do you feel otherwise?"
"Stiff. I feel like Aiko cast that body-bind curse she used on Brainy on me."
A dreamy look fell over Aiko's features as she remembered. Brainy immobile; it'd been one of her best days.
Papa bit his lip slightly, searching for the right words to say. "I see... Vanity... I'm afraid I may have some VERY bad news..."
Farmer drew a jagged breath and squeezed Vanity's hand. He already knew what Papa was going to say. "There's no easy way to tell you this, my little Smurf..." Papa said sadly, "it appears that your lower back is broken, and some of the nerves are severely damaged... to repair them would require surgery, and if it's unsuccessful, you may be paralyzed from the waist down for the rest of your life..." Papa waited for a response.
Vanity stared at him. Then, he laughed. "Well, this joke is in poor taste. Didn't anysmurf teach you it's not funny to make up things about sick people?"
There was a pause.
"WELL?" Aiko demanded.
When no one answered, she sighed. "Must I ALWAYS be the bad guy? Vanity. Shut up a minute."
She paced nervously, eyes darting about like a trapped animal's. She was cornered with no way out and she knew it. "Vanity, it's no lie. No joke. You need surgery."
Chi found herself staring at the floor, wringing her hands worriedly. Papa looked over to Aiko, wondering whether to thank her or scold her for her impeccable ability to be blunt. Farmer simply held Vanity's hand and shook his head. "They... they ain't jokin' shugah..." he said plainly.
"Heh...guess I smurfed myself into a pickle this time, eh, Farmer?"
Farmer bit his lip and gave Vanity's hand a squeeze, looking away slightly, still feeling guilty. "Y-yeah... A-Ah guess so, shugah..."
"Heh...coulda been worse, I guess..." Vanity mumbled.
Farmer nodded slightly, but couldn't bring himself to look at his lover. he just couldn't see him, knowing (or at least believing) it was his fault he was in this situation. "Yeah... Cou'da always been worse..."
Aiko turned to Papa. "That's a nasty cut above his right eye. I don't think it'll ever fully heal; it'll probably scar." She paused.
"Do I have to be the bad guy again?"
Papa shook his head, "No, Aiko. I think Vanity's experienced enough of your 'tact' today," he said, rolling his eyes slightly, "it might just be best to tell him tomorrow while he's going under the anesthesia." he added with a dry chuckle.
"In my defense, I have never had tact, seeing as I was raised in a home without it. And I never exactly saw anyone else leaping up to tell him." Aiko sniffed disdainfully.
Papa sighed a little and patted his apprentice on the back "Aiko, sometimes words are silver, and silence is gold." a loud ringing in the villlage alerted them to suppertime. the others, minus Farmer and Vanity of course, started to walk out the door. "Sorry, Vanity... no food or water until after the surgery tomorrow." Papa said.
As they started walking away, Chi caught up with Gutsy and Aiko. "Hey, Guts, Aye-Aye. K'ain talk to you guys real quick?"
"Sure, but if that's my nickname, from this point on you shall be known as Chi-Chi," Aiko teased, flashing her friends toothy smile.
Chi smiled and rolled her eyes for a moment, but then sobered up her expression. "You guys notice something... I dunno, strange, about Farmer?" she asked, her voice slightly hushed, "Even with the circumstances, something just isn't sitting right with me..."
"He's scaring me, and I don't appreciate it," Aiko muttered. "You know, I say intervention. It's obvious he's blaming himself; things are gonna get real bad real fast. Mark my words."
"Intervention is easier said than smurfed, Ai-chan..." Chi admitted gloomily, "The fact of the matter is nothing we say or do is likely to prove to Farmer he isn't at fault... and you're right, things ARE going to get worse. Maybe even...-" she rubbed her wrists out of nervous habit and looked away, but quickly brought herself back."There is no person so severely punished, as those who subject themselves to the whip of their own remorse.'"
The ice eyes widened behind their silver glasses. Unconsciously, one hand moved to rub at the shoulder of the opposite arm, scars just barely concealed. "You don't think...?"
"I DO think..." Chi muttered, glancing at Farmer and Vanity through the window, "I think things could get much, MUCH worse. Maybe not tomorrow... maybe not in another month or two... but they could... and if we're not mindful of it..." Chi bit her lip and looked at the ground, unsure of what to say, "I don't even want to think about it..."
She looked back up at her friend. "It's too soon to know for certain if he IS on that path... for all we know, we could be getting all smurfed up over nothing. I could'a just completely jumped the gun, and Farmer'll be back to normal, or something resembling normal, in a few months to a year. But I wanted to be sure I wasn't the only one with that in the back of my head, and I'm not just being oversensitive."
"I hate this. I really, really hate this. D'you know what Vanity's gonna do when he finds out about his eye? And we aren't even going to tell him until he's so doped up with drugs he can't see straight? Brilliant plan right there, guess which one of us he's gonna chew out when he wakes up tomorrow." Aiko snarled darkly.
Chi chuckled slightly, nodding and biting her lip. "Yeah... he's really gonna flip out, huh...?" she muttered, "but, large amounts of morphine seem to soften bad news. Chances are, he'll vaguely even remember it. I had an appendectomy when I was a human, they told me I'd have to stay longer while I was going under, I just kinda smiled and was like," she made a face resembling a stoner, "heh... ohhhkaay..."
Chi shrugged a little, "If it makes ya feel better, I can tell him. Then he'll just chew me out, assuming he remembers it."
"Naw, I'll do it. I'm used to being associated with bad news. Why break the perfect record now? And I know what you mean, I had my canines pulled when I was littler. Sooo loopy afterwards," she laughed. "I remember my brother asking me how I felt and I told him, 'ya know, Katana, pink would suit you. It'd bring out your eyes.' He wouldn't talk to me afterwards." Aiko smiled at the memory, which seemed ancient.
End of Chapter One: Friendship and Felines
Chi: Well, that's the end of Chapter One.
Aiko: I wanna read reviews.
Chi: Aiko, they gotta review before you can read what they have to say.
Aiko: *snaps fingers* Oh, right. PLEASE REVIEW! Motivates YinYang to keep going.
Chi: In case you're wondering what she means by that, Smurfy and YinYang finished the RP.
Aiko: HA! We know what happens and you don't!
Chi: Be nice, you meshuganah kalba***! So, yes, the sooner you review, the sooner YinYang will edit and post Chapter Two.
Aiko: So review! Do it! DO IT NOW.
Chi: *rolls eyes* Seriously, Ai-chan…
Both: Bye-bye!
TRANSLATIONS:
Ravu: Love (Japanese)
*He should burn up (Yiddish)
**Fool, jackass (Yiddish)
***Crazy bitch (Yiddish)