Disclaimer: No, I don't own them, if I did then they would all be happy
and free of life-destroying drama.
This is my take on the immediate aftermath of the season finale. I don't have the backstory written, I just had to get this in writing so it would stop bouncing around in my head. My first posted Buffyfic since I only recently moved to a place where I can get UPN. Now, hope you enjoy the first installment, the next ones won't be this long, I PROMISE…
Xander holds his broken friend in his arms and lets her sob. Willow, after losing her lover had gone on a magic binge, almost destroying herself and everyone who loved her. She cries and Xander cries and his body shakes with her exhausted weeping. He doesn't think she will ever stop crying.
"Will?" Xander says, quietly.
She looks up at him with clouded eyes. But at least her eyes are not the black pits of evil as they were when she was consumed by the magic. He runs a hand through her now red hair.
"Let's get out of here…I'll carry you…" Xander says, realizing that Willow is too weak to walk. He lifts her limp body and starts walking.
"Oh my god," Dawn gasps, seeing the destroyed Magic Box. "Willow did this?"
"Willow and Giles combined…there's nobody in here," Buffy sighs, helping Dawn crawl under a fallen beam.
"You think Giles is okay?" Dawn asks.
Buffy hugs her sister to her chest. "Anya is with him. She'll take care of him. Let's see if anyone is at our house." They start down the street as the sun starts to set.
Anya and Giles sit on Buffy's front porch, watching the sun set.
"I guess we fucked up pretty good without you," Anya says flatly.
"Did Xander teach you that word?"
Anya snorts. "Fucked-up is the definition of Xander. Did Buffy tell you that he abandoned me at the altar in front of all of my friends?"
Giles sighs, his energy drained. "She mentioned it. I'm sure you two will work it out."
"I hope not. I don't want to ever feel that way again," Anya replies. "You know for sure that Xander saved the world today?" She asks, after a pause.
"I sensed it. He did something right," Giles answers.
"Amazing."
Xander sits down, holding Willow on his lap. She is sleeping quietly after her rampage. His car is destroyed and he is feeling the burn of carrying her down the hill. The blood from the gashes she inflicted trying to turn him away has covered her clothes and has weakened him. He tries to catch his breath, but he is more worried about Willow. She snapped out of her grief-fueled magic binge but she is still going to hurt. Xander wishes he could take her pain away, his friends have suffered too much, but he knows that there is nothing he can do except be there for her. He gently lifts her back into his arms and she stirs slightly.
"Xander? Where are you taking me?" She asks, her voice low.
"Home," He replies.
"I don't want to go back there…not yet…" Willow says, her face too pale.
"Okay, Wills, whatever you want. You want me to take you to my place?" Xander offers, knowing that he doesn't have the money for a hotel.
"I just want to sleep…so tired…" She says, her eyes already closed again.
He continues walking in silence, grateful for her life.
"Giles!" Dawn squeals, breaking into a run and embracing him before he can get to his feet.
"Hello, Dawn. Are you girls okay?" Giles smiles, returning her embrace.
"Are you okay? Anya said…" Buffy starts.
"Willow took all the power that the coven loaned me and…if she hadn't been stopped I would have…" Giles starts.
"Don't say it. Where's Willow?" Buffy asks, hugging him as soon as her sister releases him.
"With Xander," Anya answers. "He saved her."
"Xander?" Dawn asks, surprised.
"Where are they?" Buffy asks.
"I'm not sure. The power from the coven let me see what happened. Xander found her and whatever he said or did…brought our Willow back. We assumed everyone would meet back here…but we haven't heard anything yet," Giles answers.
"Anya, could you…" Buffy asks, going to unlock the door.
"I should never have told you guys that I could teleport. I'll be back in a few minutes." Anya disappears.
Xander stumbles as Anya appears in front of him. "Whoa…you have got to send a warning or something, An…" Xander says, startled.
"Are you okay? You're bleeding," Anya asks, her concern evident for the first time in months.
"I'm fine…I'm tired from carrying Willow across town, but I'm fine…is everyone okay?" Xander asks, glancing at Willow to make sure she's still sleeping.
"A little scratched up, but generally okay. Where are you taking her?" Anya asks, falling into step beside him.
"Our…my apartment. She doesn't want to go to Buffy's yet. Can you tell the guys…" Before he can finish, she has vanished.
Anya materializes in Buffy's living room where Giles and the others are having coffee.
"Did you find them?" Buffy asks.
"Xander's taking her to his apartment. He said that she didn't want to come here yet," Anya answers.
"Tara…she died in the bedroom," Dawn nods, understanding.
"Willow was sleeping, Xander was carrying her. She hurt him," Anya states, her eyes distant.
"She hurt him?" Buffy asks.
"He was bleeding. His face and his chest…I mean, I saw what she was capable of…but I never thought she would hurt Xander…" Anya says.
"She wasn't Willow. She was somebody else," Buffy replies. "She didn't know what she was doing."
"Are we going over there?" Dawn asks, suddenly. "To see Willow?"
"Xander might need our help," Giles replies. "She's going to be going through withdrawal after her little escapade. Not to mention…Tara…"
"Okay. Let's go," Buffy nods.
"I'll meet you there," Anya says.
Willow stirs after Xander walks up the stairs to his apartment.
"You think you can stand, Will? I need to unlock the door," Xander says, breathless from his journey. She nods and he gently drops her to her feet. She stumbles and Xander puts an arm around her to hold her upright.
"You carried me all the way here?" Willow asks, realizing where they are.
Don't worry, I'll let you carry me around once you're well," Xander jokes. He unlocks the door and picks her up again. "Bet you never thought I'd carry you across my threshold," Xander smiles.
"Once upon a time, Xander…" She replies, with a thin smile.
He deposits her on the couch and reaches for a blanket.
"Are you okay? You're bleeding, Xander…" Willow seems lucid for the first time in a while.
"It's just a scratch. Let me get you some clothes. You want to take a shower? You hungry?" Xander asks, wrapping the blanket around her shoulders.
She shakes her head. "I just want to crash…" She blinks and looks at him, solemn. "It wasn't a dream was it?"
"I'm sorry, Will, I wish I could make it all go away," Xander says, hugging her. She starts to sob again. Xander rocks her and soon she is sleeping
again. He carries her to his bed and lays her down. He takes off her shoes and covers her with a quilt. He barely hears the knock at the door.
"Xander?" Buffy's voice is behind the door.
He swings open the door. "She's in the bedroom. She's exhausted but not all scary and veiny," Xander points.
Buffy goes straight to the bedroom.
"Giles, what are you…" Xander starts, but the watcher embraces him.
"You saved the world, Xander," Giles interrupts.
"I just hope Willow will be okay," Xander replies.
"Are you okay?" Dawn asks.
Xander glances at his bloody clothes. "Um, I guess I need to get cleaned up a little, don't I?"
Buffy comes out. "You carried Will all the way here?"
"She kind of blew up my car. She didn't want to go home because of…"
"Yeah, we figured that out. Are you hurt?" Buffy asks, relief on her face.
"It's nothing. I'm going to change. Where's Anya?" Xander asks, turning toward his bathroom.
"She was supposed…" Dawn starts. Anya materializes beside her before she can finish.
"I'm here," Anya says, sitting down on the couch beside Giles.
"Good. I think we need to stick together for a while. That was really scary," Xander sighs, continuing to the bathroom.
"I wonder what Xander said to make her snap out of it," Dawn comments.
There is a loud thump from the bathroom.
Anya and Buffy go to the door. "Xander?"
"It's okay, I just tripped over my feet. I'll be out in a minute…" Xander calls from within.
"You think he's okay?" Anya asks Buffy.
"He says he's okay, so I guess he's okay," Buffy shrugs. "I'm going to sit with Willow."
Xander holds onto the sink in his bathroom, staring at his shaking hands. He has stripped his shredded shirt off and washed away the dried blood. His abdomen is bruised and still bleeding from Willow's attack but what worries him is the blood that he just vomited into the toilet. The thump his friends heard
was the sound of him falling to his knees as the nausea overtook him. The magic that Willow hurled at him felt like it was burning his insides but at the
time, he was too worried about her to succumb to the pain. Now he thinks that she might have hurt something important. He shakes off the pain and starts to wrap bandages around his bleeding chest. He pulls on a reasonably clean shirt from his laundry and returns to his friends.
"How are you feeling? Did Willow hurt you?" Xander asks Anya, who is standing outside the door.
"She zapped me a few times, but my demon side let me recover quickly. Giles almost died," Anya says.
"I'm glad you're okay," He says, quietly.
Anya hesitates. "Me, too. I mean, I'm glad…"
"I know," Xander nods. "I'm going to go check on Will." Xander joins Buffy in his bedroom.
"She still sleeping?" Xander whispers.
Buffy nods, sitting on the edge of the bed, staring at Willow. She turns to Xander. "What did you say to her?"
"I don't know. I told her I loved her. I told her no matter how evil she was that I loved her. And she stopped. I don't think it was necessarily what I
said, Buff, I think she was tired of fighting," Xander says.
Buffy's eyes drift to his chest. "You're bleeding through your shirt, Xander."
Xander glances down and sees that he has bled through the bandages and through the shirt. "Damn," He says.
"She really hurt you, didn't she, Xan?" Buffy asks, realizing how bad her friend is hurt.
"It's nothing, let me go change these dressings…" Xander says, slowly raising himself from the seat.
Willow stirs. "Xander?"
"I'm right here, Will," Xander sits beside Buffy on the bed.
"Hey, Willow," Buffy smiles.
Willow starts to cry. "I'm so sorry, Buffy…I can't face you right now…" She reaches for Xander who enfolds her into an embrace.
"Will…" Buffy stammers.
"Xander…please…" Willow sobs. Xander gives an apologetic look to Buffy.
"Okay, Will…I'll be outside," Buffy says, leaving reluctantly.
"I can't face her…not after what I've done…I tried to hurt Dawn…I almost killed Giles…I almost killed her…" Willow sobs.
"Shh…it's okay Will, we still love you…" Xander soothes.
"Will you stay with me?" Willow asks, still crying.
"I'm right here, Will, I'll sit here with you until you kick me out…" Xander replies.
In the other room, Buffy sits down beside Dawn. "She doesn't want to see me."
"What?" Dawn asks, surprised.
She said she wasn't ready to face me yet…she asked for Xander…" Buffy says, shocked.
Giles nods. "She's going to feel a lot of guilt for what she did…Xander has always been there for her, Buffy, before you moved to Sunnydale they were best friends. Give her some time."
"I guess you're right. I'm glad you're back, Giles. I missed you," Buffy sighs.
"We all did," Dawn adds.
"I missed you, too. I think we've all made some bad decisions lately," Giles replies.
Anya stands up, suddenly. "I think we should eat. I'll go see what Xander has in the kitchen."
"I'll help you," Dawn offers.
"It's going to be okay," Giles says to Buffy, once they're alone.
"I know. Now that you're here. Willow's sane again and everybody survived. Another apocalypse averted, I guess," Buffy smiles slightly.
Xander exits the bedroom, quickly running to the bathroom. He closes the door behind him but it bounces open and Buffy, going to his aid finds him
vomiting in the toilet.
"Xander?" She asks, going to his side.
"Its nothing…just a little sick…" He coughs.
Buffy winces, turning away, but putting a comforting hand on his tense back. She turns back as he is flushing and sees the blood in the bowl.
"Xander, are you puking blood?" She gasps.
"It's nothing…" Xander replies.
"Xander, you need to go to the hospital if you're…" Buffy starts.
"I'm not leaving Willow right now. She asked me to stay with her. I'll be fine, Buffy." He stands up and takes a deep breath. "See? I'm better now."
Buffy looks at him, concerned. She puts a hand to his pale face. "You're burning up. You have to go to the hospital."
"No. We just got her back, I'm not leaving her right now," Xander replies, swaying slightly. "I'm just hot from carrying her over here."
"Is everything okay?" Giles asks, coming to the door.
Buffy opens her mouth but before she can speak, Xander says, "Sure, everything's fine." Giles leaves.
"At least let me put something on those cuts. You're still bleeding a lot," Buffy sighs, resigned.
"Okay. But I want to stay with Willow. I want to be there if she wakes up," Xander says. Buffy rummages through his bathroom and follows him back to the bedroom with her supplies.
"She feels bad about what she did to you guys, that's why she doesn't want to see you, yet," Xander whispers to Buffy.
"I understand. Giles said the same thing. Take off your shirt," Buffy says, after dabbing Neosporin on his face.
"I thought you'd never ask," Xander jokes, his eyes never leaving Willow's sleeping form. He starts to pull the shirt off but winces in pain.
"She really did a number on you, Xander…these are pretty deep," Buffy comments, after helping him pull the shirt off and cutting the bandages off.
"I was so scared that we were going to lose her. I don't know what I would do without her…" Xander says, his eyes glazing slightly.
"Well we didn't lose her…" Buffy replies.
"Almost," Xander says, under his breath.
"We made it, Xander. We saved the world again…"
"But we couldn't save Tara. We couldn't save Willow from the magic. I know we're all okay, but I can't help thinking that there was something else we could have done…ow, Buffy…that hurts…" Xander winces as she pushes gauze against his gashes.
"Big baby," Buffy teases. Her face sobers quickly. "You really need to go to the hospital, Xander."
"I promise I will…once she's more stable. Thanks, Buffy," He says as she finishes taping the gauze to his wounds.
Dawn and Anya are cooking…" Buffy says, glancing at Willow as she gets up to leave.
"Better get the fire extinguisher. It's in the pantry." Xander gingerly pulls on an open button-down shirt and then settles into his seat.
"Call me if you need anything," Buffy says.
"Of course. That couch pulls out into a bed for you guys. I know you'll want to be close to her," Xander says.
Buffy nods, closing the door behind her. Willow stirs again, moaning in her sleep.
Xander sits on the edge of the bed and soothes her by smoothing her hair. She opens her eyes, drowsily.
"Xander?"
"Go back to sleep, I'm still here," Xander says, quietly.
"I'm so tired…but my dreams are…worse than…" She says, tiredly.
"You want me to lie down with you? We can pretend it's like the old days when we used to sleep outside under the stars and there was no such thing as a hellmouth," Xander asks.
Willow smiles slightly. "Okay…that would be nice…"
Xander lies down on the bed beside her. Willow is wrapped inside a quilt and Xander puts his arms around her.
"Thank you, Xander…for everything…" She says.
"Damn, Will, you know I'd do anything for you…it's going to be okay…" Xander replies.
"You sure?" Willow asks, her voice shaking.
"Yes, I'm sure. Now, rest," Xander says. Willow closes her eyes and falls back asleep.
Buffy and Dawn are dozing on the pullout bed. Giles sits on the loveseat watching muted television and sipping tea that Anya made for him before she went home.
The door to the bedroom opens and Willow stands there shakily, holding onto the doorframe.
"Giles? Something's wrong with Xander…I can't get him to wake up," She says, panic on her strained face.
Giles rushes into the room. Xander is lying on the bed, sleeping.
"I woke up and I saw that there was blood all over the bed. I tried to wake him up…but he…he's too hot…" Willow is shaking as she explains.
"Xander?" Giles shakes him, gently, then again more roughly. "Xander, wake up…"
"I killed him…" Willow starts to cry. Buffy and Dawn are awake, hearing the commotion.
"You didn't kill him, Willow, come out here…" Buffy pulls Willow from the room and sits her on the loveseat. Buffy kneels in front of her and takes her hand.
"Willow. Xander is going to be fine, we're just all tired from worrying about you so much…listen to me…we all love you…" Buffy pulls her friend into an embrace as Willow starts to sob.
Giles puts a hand up to Xander's face, feeling the fever. The blood has soaked through the bandages again.
"What can I do?" Dawn asks, startling Giles.
"Get me some water…he's not dead, he's sleeping, I think."
Dawn returns in a moment with a glass of water.
Giles takes it from her and throws it on Xander's face.
Xander sits up with a jolt. "What the…"
"Thank God," Giles sighs, relieved.
"Did I look thirsty?" Xander asks, wiping the water from his face.
Willow, hearing his voice gets up off the couch and running back into the bedroom. She pounces on Xander. "Xander…" She sobs.
"Oh, Willow…I'm sorry I scared you…" Xander tries to calm his friend.
"Xander…" Giles starts.
Xander silences him with a warning glance as he tries to get Willow to stop crying.
"Willow? Baby, Xander's sick," Buffy says, sitting beside her on the bed.
"Don't leave me, Xander…please…" Willow sobs harder, clinging to him.
"We just want to take Xander to the doctor for a little while, Will…you don't want him to be sick, do you?" Buffy says, realizing that Xander is trembling.
Xander smiles slightly at Willow as she pulls away.
"I made you sick?" She asks, sniffling and choking on her tears.
"No…I was getting sick before all this went down…Willow…I will be back before you know I'm gone…Do you believe me?" Xander asks.
Willow nods. "I'll stay with Buffy…but…"
"I'll be back in a flash, I promise…" Xander says, hugging her tightly before climbing off the bed.
"Xander?" Giles steadies the young man as he stumbles slightly into the other room.
"I feel like shit…" Xander admits.
"Can you make it downstairs? I'll go get the car and meet you out front," Giles says.
"Yeah…I'll be right behind you…I just have to use the bathroom…" Xander starts toward the bathroom. Giles turns to leave, but something stops him. He follows Xander to the bathroom.
Xander is standing in front of the mirror, holding up his shirt. The bloodied bandages are glowing with a white light.
"Xander?"
"Do you see that? What the hell is that?" Xander asks, staring.
This is my take on the immediate aftermath of the season finale. I don't have the backstory written, I just had to get this in writing so it would stop bouncing around in my head. My first posted Buffyfic since I only recently moved to a place where I can get UPN. Now, hope you enjoy the first installment, the next ones won't be this long, I PROMISE…
Xander holds his broken friend in his arms and lets her sob. Willow, after losing her lover had gone on a magic binge, almost destroying herself and everyone who loved her. She cries and Xander cries and his body shakes with her exhausted weeping. He doesn't think she will ever stop crying.
"Will?" Xander says, quietly.
She looks up at him with clouded eyes. But at least her eyes are not the black pits of evil as they were when she was consumed by the magic. He runs a hand through her now red hair.
"Let's get out of here…I'll carry you…" Xander says, realizing that Willow is too weak to walk. He lifts her limp body and starts walking.
"Oh my god," Dawn gasps, seeing the destroyed Magic Box. "Willow did this?"
"Willow and Giles combined…there's nobody in here," Buffy sighs, helping Dawn crawl under a fallen beam.
"You think Giles is okay?" Dawn asks.
Buffy hugs her sister to her chest. "Anya is with him. She'll take care of him. Let's see if anyone is at our house." They start down the street as the sun starts to set.
Anya and Giles sit on Buffy's front porch, watching the sun set.
"I guess we fucked up pretty good without you," Anya says flatly.
"Did Xander teach you that word?"
Anya snorts. "Fucked-up is the definition of Xander. Did Buffy tell you that he abandoned me at the altar in front of all of my friends?"
Giles sighs, his energy drained. "She mentioned it. I'm sure you two will work it out."
"I hope not. I don't want to ever feel that way again," Anya replies. "You know for sure that Xander saved the world today?" She asks, after a pause.
"I sensed it. He did something right," Giles answers.
"Amazing."
Xander sits down, holding Willow on his lap. She is sleeping quietly after her rampage. His car is destroyed and he is feeling the burn of carrying her down the hill. The blood from the gashes she inflicted trying to turn him away has covered her clothes and has weakened him. He tries to catch his breath, but he is more worried about Willow. She snapped out of her grief-fueled magic binge but she is still going to hurt. Xander wishes he could take her pain away, his friends have suffered too much, but he knows that there is nothing he can do except be there for her. He gently lifts her back into his arms and she stirs slightly.
"Xander? Where are you taking me?" She asks, her voice low.
"Home," He replies.
"I don't want to go back there…not yet…" Willow says, her face too pale.
"Okay, Wills, whatever you want. You want me to take you to my place?" Xander offers, knowing that he doesn't have the money for a hotel.
"I just want to sleep…so tired…" She says, her eyes already closed again.
He continues walking in silence, grateful for her life.
"Giles!" Dawn squeals, breaking into a run and embracing him before he can get to his feet.
"Hello, Dawn. Are you girls okay?" Giles smiles, returning her embrace.
"Are you okay? Anya said…" Buffy starts.
"Willow took all the power that the coven loaned me and…if she hadn't been stopped I would have…" Giles starts.
"Don't say it. Where's Willow?" Buffy asks, hugging him as soon as her sister releases him.
"With Xander," Anya answers. "He saved her."
"Xander?" Dawn asks, surprised.
"Where are they?" Buffy asks.
"I'm not sure. The power from the coven let me see what happened. Xander found her and whatever he said or did…brought our Willow back. We assumed everyone would meet back here…but we haven't heard anything yet," Giles answers.
"Anya, could you…" Buffy asks, going to unlock the door.
"I should never have told you guys that I could teleport. I'll be back in a few minutes." Anya disappears.
Xander stumbles as Anya appears in front of him. "Whoa…you have got to send a warning or something, An…" Xander says, startled.
"Are you okay? You're bleeding," Anya asks, her concern evident for the first time in months.
"I'm fine…I'm tired from carrying Willow across town, but I'm fine…is everyone okay?" Xander asks, glancing at Willow to make sure she's still sleeping.
"A little scratched up, but generally okay. Where are you taking her?" Anya asks, falling into step beside him.
"Our…my apartment. She doesn't want to go to Buffy's yet. Can you tell the guys…" Before he can finish, she has vanished.
Anya materializes in Buffy's living room where Giles and the others are having coffee.
"Did you find them?" Buffy asks.
"Xander's taking her to his apartment. He said that she didn't want to come here yet," Anya answers.
"Tara…she died in the bedroom," Dawn nods, understanding.
"Willow was sleeping, Xander was carrying her. She hurt him," Anya states, her eyes distant.
"She hurt him?" Buffy asks.
"He was bleeding. His face and his chest…I mean, I saw what she was capable of…but I never thought she would hurt Xander…" Anya says.
"She wasn't Willow. She was somebody else," Buffy replies. "She didn't know what she was doing."
"Are we going over there?" Dawn asks, suddenly. "To see Willow?"
"Xander might need our help," Giles replies. "She's going to be going through withdrawal after her little escapade. Not to mention…Tara…"
"Okay. Let's go," Buffy nods.
"I'll meet you there," Anya says.
Willow stirs after Xander walks up the stairs to his apartment.
"You think you can stand, Will? I need to unlock the door," Xander says, breathless from his journey. She nods and he gently drops her to her feet. She stumbles and Xander puts an arm around her to hold her upright.
"You carried me all the way here?" Willow asks, realizing where they are.
Don't worry, I'll let you carry me around once you're well," Xander jokes. He unlocks the door and picks her up again. "Bet you never thought I'd carry you across my threshold," Xander smiles.
"Once upon a time, Xander…" She replies, with a thin smile.
He deposits her on the couch and reaches for a blanket.
"Are you okay? You're bleeding, Xander…" Willow seems lucid for the first time in a while.
"It's just a scratch. Let me get you some clothes. You want to take a shower? You hungry?" Xander asks, wrapping the blanket around her shoulders.
She shakes her head. "I just want to crash…" She blinks and looks at him, solemn. "It wasn't a dream was it?"
"I'm sorry, Will, I wish I could make it all go away," Xander says, hugging her. She starts to sob again. Xander rocks her and soon she is sleeping
again. He carries her to his bed and lays her down. He takes off her shoes and covers her with a quilt. He barely hears the knock at the door.
"Xander?" Buffy's voice is behind the door.
He swings open the door. "She's in the bedroom. She's exhausted but not all scary and veiny," Xander points.
Buffy goes straight to the bedroom.
"Giles, what are you…" Xander starts, but the watcher embraces him.
"You saved the world, Xander," Giles interrupts.
"I just hope Willow will be okay," Xander replies.
"Are you okay?" Dawn asks.
Xander glances at his bloody clothes. "Um, I guess I need to get cleaned up a little, don't I?"
Buffy comes out. "You carried Will all the way here?"
"She kind of blew up my car. She didn't want to go home because of…"
"Yeah, we figured that out. Are you hurt?" Buffy asks, relief on her face.
"It's nothing. I'm going to change. Where's Anya?" Xander asks, turning toward his bathroom.
"She was supposed…" Dawn starts. Anya materializes beside her before she can finish.
"I'm here," Anya says, sitting down on the couch beside Giles.
"Good. I think we need to stick together for a while. That was really scary," Xander sighs, continuing to the bathroom.
"I wonder what Xander said to make her snap out of it," Dawn comments.
There is a loud thump from the bathroom.
Anya and Buffy go to the door. "Xander?"
"It's okay, I just tripped over my feet. I'll be out in a minute…" Xander calls from within.
"You think he's okay?" Anya asks Buffy.
"He says he's okay, so I guess he's okay," Buffy shrugs. "I'm going to sit with Willow."
Xander holds onto the sink in his bathroom, staring at his shaking hands. He has stripped his shredded shirt off and washed away the dried blood. His abdomen is bruised and still bleeding from Willow's attack but what worries him is the blood that he just vomited into the toilet. The thump his friends heard
was the sound of him falling to his knees as the nausea overtook him. The magic that Willow hurled at him felt like it was burning his insides but at the
time, he was too worried about her to succumb to the pain. Now he thinks that she might have hurt something important. He shakes off the pain and starts to wrap bandages around his bleeding chest. He pulls on a reasonably clean shirt from his laundry and returns to his friends.
"How are you feeling? Did Willow hurt you?" Xander asks Anya, who is standing outside the door.
"She zapped me a few times, but my demon side let me recover quickly. Giles almost died," Anya says.
"I'm glad you're okay," He says, quietly.
Anya hesitates. "Me, too. I mean, I'm glad…"
"I know," Xander nods. "I'm going to go check on Will." Xander joins Buffy in his bedroom.
"She still sleeping?" Xander whispers.
Buffy nods, sitting on the edge of the bed, staring at Willow. She turns to Xander. "What did you say to her?"
"I don't know. I told her I loved her. I told her no matter how evil she was that I loved her. And she stopped. I don't think it was necessarily what I
said, Buff, I think she was tired of fighting," Xander says.
Buffy's eyes drift to his chest. "You're bleeding through your shirt, Xander."
Xander glances down and sees that he has bled through the bandages and through the shirt. "Damn," He says.
"She really hurt you, didn't she, Xan?" Buffy asks, realizing how bad her friend is hurt.
"It's nothing, let me go change these dressings…" Xander says, slowly raising himself from the seat.
Willow stirs. "Xander?"
"I'm right here, Will," Xander sits beside Buffy on the bed.
"Hey, Willow," Buffy smiles.
Willow starts to cry. "I'm so sorry, Buffy…I can't face you right now…" She reaches for Xander who enfolds her into an embrace.
"Will…" Buffy stammers.
"Xander…please…" Willow sobs. Xander gives an apologetic look to Buffy.
"Okay, Will…I'll be outside," Buffy says, leaving reluctantly.
"I can't face her…not after what I've done…I tried to hurt Dawn…I almost killed Giles…I almost killed her…" Willow sobs.
"Shh…it's okay Will, we still love you…" Xander soothes.
"Will you stay with me?" Willow asks, still crying.
"I'm right here, Will, I'll sit here with you until you kick me out…" Xander replies.
In the other room, Buffy sits down beside Dawn. "She doesn't want to see me."
"What?" Dawn asks, surprised.
She said she wasn't ready to face me yet…she asked for Xander…" Buffy says, shocked.
Giles nods. "She's going to feel a lot of guilt for what she did…Xander has always been there for her, Buffy, before you moved to Sunnydale they were best friends. Give her some time."
"I guess you're right. I'm glad you're back, Giles. I missed you," Buffy sighs.
"We all did," Dawn adds.
"I missed you, too. I think we've all made some bad decisions lately," Giles replies.
Anya stands up, suddenly. "I think we should eat. I'll go see what Xander has in the kitchen."
"I'll help you," Dawn offers.
"It's going to be okay," Giles says to Buffy, once they're alone.
"I know. Now that you're here. Willow's sane again and everybody survived. Another apocalypse averted, I guess," Buffy smiles slightly.
Xander exits the bedroom, quickly running to the bathroom. He closes the door behind him but it bounces open and Buffy, going to his aid finds him
vomiting in the toilet.
"Xander?" She asks, going to his side.
"Its nothing…just a little sick…" He coughs.
Buffy winces, turning away, but putting a comforting hand on his tense back. She turns back as he is flushing and sees the blood in the bowl.
"Xander, are you puking blood?" She gasps.
"It's nothing…" Xander replies.
"Xander, you need to go to the hospital if you're…" Buffy starts.
"I'm not leaving Willow right now. She asked me to stay with her. I'll be fine, Buffy." He stands up and takes a deep breath. "See? I'm better now."
Buffy looks at him, concerned. She puts a hand to his pale face. "You're burning up. You have to go to the hospital."
"No. We just got her back, I'm not leaving her right now," Xander replies, swaying slightly. "I'm just hot from carrying her over here."
"Is everything okay?" Giles asks, coming to the door.
Buffy opens her mouth but before she can speak, Xander says, "Sure, everything's fine." Giles leaves.
"At least let me put something on those cuts. You're still bleeding a lot," Buffy sighs, resigned.
"Okay. But I want to stay with Willow. I want to be there if she wakes up," Xander says. Buffy rummages through his bathroom and follows him back to the bedroom with her supplies.
"She feels bad about what she did to you guys, that's why she doesn't want to see you, yet," Xander whispers to Buffy.
"I understand. Giles said the same thing. Take off your shirt," Buffy says, after dabbing Neosporin on his face.
"I thought you'd never ask," Xander jokes, his eyes never leaving Willow's sleeping form. He starts to pull the shirt off but winces in pain.
"She really did a number on you, Xander…these are pretty deep," Buffy comments, after helping him pull the shirt off and cutting the bandages off.
"I was so scared that we were going to lose her. I don't know what I would do without her…" Xander says, his eyes glazing slightly.
"Well we didn't lose her…" Buffy replies.
"Almost," Xander says, under his breath.
"We made it, Xander. We saved the world again…"
"But we couldn't save Tara. We couldn't save Willow from the magic. I know we're all okay, but I can't help thinking that there was something else we could have done…ow, Buffy…that hurts…" Xander winces as she pushes gauze against his gashes.
"Big baby," Buffy teases. Her face sobers quickly. "You really need to go to the hospital, Xander."
"I promise I will…once she's more stable. Thanks, Buffy," He says as she finishes taping the gauze to his wounds.
Dawn and Anya are cooking…" Buffy says, glancing at Willow as she gets up to leave.
"Better get the fire extinguisher. It's in the pantry." Xander gingerly pulls on an open button-down shirt and then settles into his seat.
"Call me if you need anything," Buffy says.
"Of course. That couch pulls out into a bed for you guys. I know you'll want to be close to her," Xander says.
Buffy nods, closing the door behind her. Willow stirs again, moaning in her sleep.
Xander sits on the edge of the bed and soothes her by smoothing her hair. She opens her eyes, drowsily.
"Xander?"
"Go back to sleep, I'm still here," Xander says, quietly.
"I'm so tired…but my dreams are…worse than…" She says, tiredly.
"You want me to lie down with you? We can pretend it's like the old days when we used to sleep outside under the stars and there was no such thing as a hellmouth," Xander asks.
Willow smiles slightly. "Okay…that would be nice…"
Xander lies down on the bed beside her. Willow is wrapped inside a quilt and Xander puts his arms around her.
"Thank you, Xander…for everything…" She says.
"Damn, Will, you know I'd do anything for you…it's going to be okay…" Xander replies.
"You sure?" Willow asks, her voice shaking.
"Yes, I'm sure. Now, rest," Xander says. Willow closes her eyes and falls back asleep.
Buffy and Dawn are dozing on the pullout bed. Giles sits on the loveseat watching muted television and sipping tea that Anya made for him before she went home.
The door to the bedroom opens and Willow stands there shakily, holding onto the doorframe.
"Giles? Something's wrong with Xander…I can't get him to wake up," She says, panic on her strained face.
Giles rushes into the room. Xander is lying on the bed, sleeping.
"I woke up and I saw that there was blood all over the bed. I tried to wake him up…but he…he's too hot…" Willow is shaking as she explains.
"Xander?" Giles shakes him, gently, then again more roughly. "Xander, wake up…"
"I killed him…" Willow starts to cry. Buffy and Dawn are awake, hearing the commotion.
"You didn't kill him, Willow, come out here…" Buffy pulls Willow from the room and sits her on the loveseat. Buffy kneels in front of her and takes her hand.
"Willow. Xander is going to be fine, we're just all tired from worrying about you so much…listen to me…we all love you…" Buffy pulls her friend into an embrace as Willow starts to sob.
Giles puts a hand up to Xander's face, feeling the fever. The blood has soaked through the bandages again.
"What can I do?" Dawn asks, startling Giles.
"Get me some water…he's not dead, he's sleeping, I think."
Dawn returns in a moment with a glass of water.
Giles takes it from her and throws it on Xander's face.
Xander sits up with a jolt. "What the…"
"Thank God," Giles sighs, relieved.
"Did I look thirsty?" Xander asks, wiping the water from his face.
Willow, hearing his voice gets up off the couch and running back into the bedroom. She pounces on Xander. "Xander…" She sobs.
"Oh, Willow…I'm sorry I scared you…" Xander tries to calm his friend.
"Xander…" Giles starts.
Xander silences him with a warning glance as he tries to get Willow to stop crying.
"Willow? Baby, Xander's sick," Buffy says, sitting beside her on the bed.
"Don't leave me, Xander…please…" Willow sobs harder, clinging to him.
"We just want to take Xander to the doctor for a little while, Will…you don't want him to be sick, do you?" Buffy says, realizing that Xander is trembling.
Xander smiles slightly at Willow as she pulls away.
"I made you sick?" She asks, sniffling and choking on her tears.
"No…I was getting sick before all this went down…Willow…I will be back before you know I'm gone…Do you believe me?" Xander asks.
Willow nods. "I'll stay with Buffy…but…"
"I'll be back in a flash, I promise…" Xander says, hugging her tightly before climbing off the bed.
"Xander?" Giles steadies the young man as he stumbles slightly into the other room.
"I feel like shit…" Xander admits.
"Can you make it downstairs? I'll go get the car and meet you out front," Giles says.
"Yeah…I'll be right behind you…I just have to use the bathroom…" Xander starts toward the bathroom. Giles turns to leave, but something stops him. He follows Xander to the bathroom.
Xander is standing in front of the mirror, holding up his shirt. The bloodied bandages are glowing with a white light.
"Xander?"
"Do you see that? What the hell is that?" Xander asks, staring.