A/N: I know that's there's many stories out there where Callie gets pregnant, but I really wanted to tackle the idea, because as much as I wish, nothing works out well for her.
It didn't even bother to cross my mind when I came down with the Flu. Jude had days earlier and I just assumed I got it from him. Stef and Lena assumed the same thing, giving me small smiles- still upset that I couldn't get adopted. I also didn't think anything of it when I started vomiting, or when I missed my period.
In fact, it was Mariana who put the idea into my head.
We were sitting in our room, and I was working on my homework while she was picking out her outfits for the rest of the week.
"Are you okay?" Mariana suddenly asks, her arms falling limply at her sides. "You've been quieter than usual."
I nod my head much quicker than I needed to, and she only raises her eyebrow questionably. "I just haven't been feel that good lately," I admit, fear suddenly creeping into me. "Tired. Maybe just the flu from Jude."
"Either that or Wyatt has gotten very friendly with you." Mariana says, and I stare at her in shock. I haven't talked to Wyatt since the day of Jude's adoption, and he's probably wondering what he did wrong this time. Which wasn't anything.
"W-what?" I stutter, and Mariana just laughs, turning her attention back to her clothes.
"I'm just kidding, you know. Just messing with your head. There's no way you're pregnant, I know you. You'd be way more careful than that," Mariana tells me, slowly growing serious. "Are you done with your homework? It's already ten. We should go to bed."
This small yet terrifying conversation had only occurred a few hours ago, yet it has been stuck in my mind ever since.
Now, here I am, sitting in a math lesson, not paying attention to my teacher drone on about the rules of how to solve the problem, as my mind settles on a more serious and important subject.
Could it be?
I shake my head. I haven't had a period in months. There's a reasonable explanation for this. I'm stressed. I haven't been eating enough. There's no other reason. There can't be.
It isn't possible.
It was only one time.
It was my first time, my first real time. It had happened on the beach, where I had somehow found my way too. Few people go to the private little spot I like, especially anyone I know. The act itself didn't last longer than forty minutes. It was an act that had only occurred due to both of our states of weakness. I was upset. Which only made him upset.
It happened five weeks ago, on the same day as Jude got adopted, and I found out I had a different birth father. I was angry and confused at why my mother didn't tell me, and then I was sad. Realizing that some stranger I have never heard of in my life is the reason why I can't have a family.
He and I had stopped talking to each other before, trying to keep our distance. Even then, we had said few words and mostly sat in silence, trying to hold in our tears. I broke first, heart-breaking sobs escaping me as I buried my face in his strong frame. It didn't take long before his tears started to fall down his face as he wrapped an arm around my shoulders, and tried to comfort me, whispering stuff in my ear. "I'm sorry," He'd say over and over again, making me feel worse. I was part of the reason why he was crying. "I'm sorry I can't give you what you want."
If it had been any other day, I would've pushed him away, telling him that it wasn't what I wanted, or I couldn't stand being close to him. But on that day, the day I needed comfort, his warm touch was there to sooth me... and then we were kissing... and then we were touching and...
It just happened.
It was bound to happen with him anyways, right? With the tension of him becoming my brother, and the idea still doesn't settle in my mind. I just don't understand why we weren't more careful. Both of us were well aware of the consequences if anybody were to find out.
It was awkward and clumsy and uncomfortable, my body pressed against the damp sand beneath me, his body above mine, trying to keep his weight from crushing my much smaller frame.
After, both of us had been horrified. He had apologized like he had pounced on me like a wild animal, when in fact I was the one who leaned into his touch and wanted more. Both of us scrambled for our clothes, both clearly disappointed in ourselves. We didn't say another word- well, I didn't. But him, he wouldn't shut up. He kept saying sorry and asking me if I was okay, if he had hurt me, and I almost told him that he would never hurt me, but I didn't. Instead I just snapped. "Shut up! Just shut up, Brandon! Nobody can know about this!"
I instantly felt bad as he stood there in shock, his shirt still in his hands. "I'm sorry. Callie, I'm sorry. I messed everything up again. I'm sorry. I won't say a word!" Brandon told me, quickly and desperately, almost like I wouldn't believe him.
The possibility of a baby coming out of those forty minutes had never crossed my mind... until now, thanks to Mariana. Maybe it's because I force myself not to think about that night again. I always catch myself and quickly change my train of thought before I allow my mind to settle on the memory of that night.
Other than that incident and the daily run in around the house, we had never actually interacted since. Our eyes have met several times for a few seconds in the hallway at school, or when we'd help Stef and Lena set up the table, before we both look away, our cheeks a bright shade of pink.
Coming out of my thoughts, I tense, remembering that he is in my math class and that he is seated a row in front of me and two seats to the left. I let my eyes give him a quick once-over and it's enough to know that he is completely bored, along with everyone else in the class.
He turns his head, I think to look out of the window, but then his soft, caring eyes meet mine, and he gives a small awkward smile. I'm the first one to look away, the possibility of me carrying his child is in the very front of my mind and, however many times I try not to think about it, I just can't make the thought disappear.
If Mariana is right, then there is a possibility that I may bring a baby into this cruel world where it could and most likely get taken away and put into foster care. Or I could get away with being pregnant, but I won't be able to support it. They are just a few reasons why I have never wanted to have children.
It'll also ruin Brandon's life. Not just yours.
My eyes are suddenly on him again, and he's not facing me anymore so I'm only awarded with his brown hair. No, I can't let that happen. Nobody can ever find out that it's Brandon's. I won't ruin anything else for him after everything he risked.
I still don't know if I'm actually pregnant. The only way to know is to use one of the pregnancies tests that Stef and Lena keep in the bathroom upstairs for pregnancy scares. I swear they've gone to the store three times in one month when Jesus started dating Haley. If they somehow see it in the trash, they'll just assume it's for her, right? Still, if I am pregnant then they'll pounce onto Jesus like vultures.
The bell rings, and I can feel Brandon's eyes on me as I leave the room in a hurry, hugging my textbook to my chest. I find Jude, which has become part of my schedule. "Hey, bud. How was school?" I ask, hoping that whatever Jude says will take my mind off the entire situation. "We learned the differences between DNA and RNA," Jude tells me proudly, and I can't help but smile. "And pulled DNA out of a strawberry."
"Did you work with Connor?" I question, remembering meeting Jude's friend the day of his adoption. Connor made me feel better about Jude being in school, knowing he isn't completely alone in class.
"Yeah, I did. He let me keep the DNA. See?" Jude tells me, holding out a clear tube that just looks like it has mold in it.
"That's pretty cool, bud."
"I know. I like it."
I force a small laugh. "I'm glad you do, Jude."
"Well," Jude say happily, looking up at me. "What about your day? How was it?"
"Long." I answer as we turn the corner, and I walk into something. More like someone.
"Callie," Brandon breathes, grabbing my wrist quickly, worry in his eyes. "God, I'm sorry. But we need to get home. I already started the car." Brandon says quickly, looking at me then to Jude quickly.
The walk to the car is quiet, and the ride is loud with the twins bickering. Stef and Lena are already in the kitchen, talking about whatever drama the twins cause at school today, and I still don't say a thing. "How was your day, honey?" Stef asks as I pass her on my way upstairs.
I only nod in response, a word still not coming out of my mouth, and his eyes are on me again. I ignore the looks I get from everybody. I nervously close the bathroom door and pull out one of the boxes from underneath the sink. I follow the instructions step-by-step, before I place the stick-like object to the side. This all seems so simple. One stupid symbol can change my life forever.
It has to be nothing, I tell myself. Mariana put the ridiculous thought into your head, and now you are being paranoid. It's not possible. One time. One real time.
"Callie?" Jude's soft voice calls through the door, bringing me out of my thoughts.
"What is it?" I ask, nerves making my fingers tremble. Knowing Jude, he can probably hear the fear in my voice.
"Are you okay? You didn't say anything when you came in."
"I'm fine. I'll be right out," I reply, holding my breath. I sigh in relief as I hear him walk away before I realize that it is time, and I become tense once again.
I look at the box. A one line means negative. Two lines means positive. A few minutes has passed now. I pick up the test, and squeeze my eyes tightly shut before I force them open. I look down at the stick.
And two bold lines stare back at me.