A Questionable Love

By: theunknownvoice

Disclaimer: I don't own Fruits Basket.

A/N: Please review even if you hate the pairing.

"How could you?" Shigure demanded of me.

I said nothing as I had Hatori examine me again. It was obvious that something had been wrong with me. I had been sick more lately. The common flu had nothing to do with it. I was weak but I knew the truth.

I had felt the child growing for sometime. I could see Hatori's face line with fear.

"It's as I suspected," he said turning to look at me. "You're going to be a mother. You should know that with your frail health this pregnancy is a risk. You're only three weeks along."

Shigure continued glaring at me. I hadn't been near him in over a month. I felt his jealous gaze at me. He would want to know whom the affair had been with. Surely he suspected but he had always trusted me until now.

"I'll be outside," Hatori said escusing himself.

Poor Ha'ri, I thought bitterly, he's afraid of being caught in the middle. Who would he choose in a battle between his goddess and his sworn brother? Who indeed?

I let go. Hatori was a good man. A man I had wronged many times. Maybe it was because I favored him I didn't make him endure the fight. Maybe it was because part of me felt that I owed him. It didn't matter.

"How could you choose to be with someone else? I thought you loved me," Shigure said glaring at me.

I said nothing as he moved to grab my arm. My eyes lit with fire. "What do you want from me?" I yelled.

"Tell me who it is," he demanded as he pulled me closer to him.

I shoved him away. "Leave me," I commanded.

I could see him trying to battle the curse. He was trying to disobey but he had no choice. I knew he loved me in his own way but I had long since sought the company of another.

I thought over my options. This morning the world had been simple. No child was coming from me. No infant would enter this world from my body. Yet I had loved and my consequences were upon.

The choices remained open for me. I knew that many would advice me to get rid of this babe. But I couldn't. Weak and sick though I was this might be the only child I would ever birth.

I heard the door open as I sat out in my garden. It was early spring and the air was a tad chill. I would soon have to be more careful.

"You shouldn't be out here. Hatori will be angry if you get sick again," Kureno said as he wrapped his arms around me.

"Did you talk to him?" I asked biting my lip.

He shook his head.

I stared at my beloved sparrow. I still wasn't sure of anything he felt for me. Kureno had always been good at hiding his feelings. How could I tell him of the child?

"I saw Shigure though," he whispered as he peered into the garden.

"Did he tell you anything?" I asked my voice far from a whisper.

He turned to gaze at me. "We're you going to tell me of this child?"

My fear consumed me. I dared not look at him.

He will leave. They will all leave you. You will live alone and you will die alone. No will love you. Who could love a vicious monster like you? my mother's words racked in my brain.

I stood up pulling myself away from him. My back was turned as I gazed into the garden. "I was going to tell you," I said.

"What are we going to do?" he asked as he moved behind me.

I felt his strong arms wrap around me and pull me close.

"You're not going to leave me?" I asked my voice breaking.

He shook his head and gave me as a small smile.

For five months it was just the two of us. This man who I loved so dearly became everything. Kureno was patient with as he always had been. He endured my anger, my desire, my hatred, and my selfishness.

One afternoon he left me alone in the house. I followed him closely. I saw him enter a restaurant and sit down at a table.

There was young woman sitting opposite of him. Her hair was bleached blond and long. Her eyebrows had long since been shaved. She smiled at him happily.

Jealousy and hatred gnawed at my heart. What was going on? I had feared he would leave me. For once I remained calmn and listened as they began to speak.

"It's been a while since I've seen you," she said as she gazed at him.

"I've been busy. How are you Arisa?" he asked as he gazed through the menu.

"I've been good. Tohru finally told me that she knew you. She helped set up the meeting."

My blood ran cold. Once again the Honda girl had interfered with one of my own. The little monster could not leave me be.

"I asked her to tell you to come here. I wished to speak with you," he said.

My heart beat faster. He had wanted to see her. My anger began to burn as I continued to listen.

"I'm glad you did. I've wanted to see you for a while," she said.

His eyes stared at her. I could see him reading her carefully. "I want you to forget me, Arisa."

"What?" She was shocked and so was I.

"I'm in love. I'm in love and that woman is carrying my baby. I wanted to be friends with you. But you feel other things for me."

"You played me!" she accused.

"No, I felt a spark. But it was nothing compared to what I feel for her."

"I hate you," she screamed at him. "How could you stomp on my emotions like that?"

"I'm sorry," he said quietly.

She ran through the restaurant. I followed her closely and found her crying on the step.

"You shouldn't cry over something like this. At least he didn't lie to you," I said as I sat down next to her.

She turned to look at me. "What would someone like you know about it?"

"I heard you. I was in the restaurant. How well did you know him?" I asked trying to find some information.

"I met him a few times. We went out once. It was a love at first sight thing," she said.

Inwardly I breathed a sigh of relief. She did not really know him. "It's just attraction. You'll find someone. But I don't recommend trying to make him change his mind."

"Why not?"

"I'm not too forgiving of people who chase after the man I love."

She took her breath in quickly. Her anger filled eyes met mine. She glanced over to my stomache. I was barely beginning to show but it was still there.

She moved away from me and prepared to walk away.

"Don't hate him," I said to her.

She turned and looked back at me.

"Hate me instead."

I turned to walk back to my car. Kureno stood there patiently waiting for me.

"I heard what you said," he said quietly.

"Are you angry with me?" I asked.

"I was but I'm not now. I never thought you loved me," he whispered.

I kissed his lips quickly. "I thought you viewed me as an obligation."

"We're a pair of fools," he chuckled.

I laughed as I sat down with him in the car.

The remaining four months flew by. As the pregnancy progressed the harder it was for me to move. I was always tired. My body was weak. Every time I became sick Kureno worried himself. He began to drive me crazy but the baby did come.

My daughter was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. My sweet Sen looked so beautiful. My breathing was labored but I watched my daughter with her father. My two favorites smiled at each other.

I had survived. And in the end I was happy. What more could a goddess ask for?

The End