I wonder what happens if Itachi acts like Ayame from Fruits Basket...
And I hope this Fanfic is AT LEAST a little bit funny. Please I beg you, no flames x(
Probably the most challenging thing about being a ninja is to hide their emotions. It is rather one of the rules to never shed a single drop of tear. It's quite amazing though somehow yet we're still humans. We just trained ourselves to cover up our emoitions.
Meet Itachi Uchiha. The young lad that killed his whole clan minus his beloved brother Sasuke who turned him into a avenger psychopath. Now Sasuke never really knew the REAL reason why Itachi killed every single Uchiha alive until Madara revealed everything.
Itachi has always loved his little brother. Always..
"Oh my little brother!" Itachi cried after he left an unconcious Sasuke who is also surrounded with many bloody corpses. "You're suffering will start now! I am sorry I was the cost of it!"
Itachi looked up at the night sky and made a fist and said,
"But I must my beloved little brother! So that you won't have to suffer as much! I'm such a good brother! If only my brother
Now, Orochimaru attempted to make Itachi his next reincarnation but failed. So, he targets the other surviving Uchiha. He successfully made Sasuke his by labeling him with his curse mark. Now when Itachi found out about it,
"No!" he cried in solid tears. "My dear, poor little brother in the clutches of that Snake Rapist! How dare he bit my brother's delicate little neck! And worse! Putting that disgusting,ugly curse mark on him! Now he's marked as his little pawn! My poor brother is going to be in the hands of a psychopath! Oh I know I should have killed that Snake-ass evil psycopath when I had the chance! My little brother!"
"Itachi," his partner Kisame said. "Calm the heck down."
"Shut the fuck up shark boy!" Itachi glared and activated his Mangekyou Sharingan. In a snap, Kisame was in his clutches. As in Itachi is attacking him with genjutsu.
"No!" Kisame shrieked in horror as he saw his lifetime nightmare. People eating soup. But not just any soup.
It was shark fin soup. Poor Kisame was suffering as he watches a various group of crowd eating, devouring every single sip of the soup. It was Kisame's ultimate nightmare.
"Such cruelty!" Kisame cried. "Animal abuse! Why can't everyone just be a vegetarian instead! Oh dear Kami!"
Seconds later, in the real world that is, Itachi deactivated his mangekyou leaving his partner panting for his life. For Kisame, this nightmare was like his own death. How did Itachi found out? Well let's just say he was happy that Kisame talks when he sleeps.
"You evil evil evil man!" Kisame cried. "How could you do such a-"
"I'm hungry," Itachi interrupted him and started to exit the cave.
"Oh," Kisame said, getting up as well. "Might as well get something to eat. So what are we having?"
"Shark Fin Soup."
"NO!"
News can spread fast. No. They do spread fast like wildfire. Now when the Older Uchiha found out about the Third Hokage's death and the village's current state, Itachi is immediately concerned about his little brother even though he successfully hides it and puts on a stoic face. His mission with Kisame is to capture Naruto in order to get the Nine-Tailed Fox. Taking this as his advantage, Itachi and Kisame 'visited' Konoha not only for the missin but also, to see how his little brother is doing.
"My beloved little brother!" Itachi thought. "I hope you are doing well for I have return to see you! Oh how I regret making you suffer but it was for a good reason!"
When Sasuke found out that his brother has returned, he was in rage. Immediately he searches for his brother. The man that killed his whole family. He believes that today will be the day that he will die in his hands. After all, that is what Itachi said to him.
"Foolish little brother, if you wish to kill me, hate me, detest me. And yet survive in an unsightly way. Run, run and cling to life, and when you have the same eyes as mine, come to me."
"It's been quite awhile Sasuke..." Itachi told him.
"Oh my dear look at you Sasuke! My you have grown! I wish I could hug you right now my dear brother!" he thought. "And I really wish I could tell you how to dress better! I mean look at that getup! Well..I admit that it's better than Gai's green spandex.. My dear Kami does my little brother even eat? Oh dear this is all my fault! He must to be too busy training hard that he rarely gets himself a nutritious meal! My gosh he lacks so many vitamins and minerals! Does he even eat a balanced breakfast? My gosh Sasuke!"
"Hmm?" Kisame said and saw the younger Uchiha.
Sasuke glared at his brother. Filler with anger he shows Itachi his new jutsu, Chidori. Itachi still has the 'no emotion' face pasted on him. However on the inside,
"Oh my goodness!" he thought proudly. "My younger brother knows the famous Chidori? Oh I am so proud right now! My dear brother is getting stronger everyday! I must hug him! No! I must resist! Man I missing poking his little forehead!"
For the sake of the mission, Itachi must not die yet. Thanks to his skills, he prevented the attack by grabbing Sasuke's wrist, hard.
"My kami does he ever heard of this thing called lotion?" Itachi cried. "Oh my goodness Sasuke! Not only you have to get stronger if you want to beat me, but you also need help with hygiene! Your skin is so totally not smooth like mine!"
Suffering from the inside he sadly snapped his wrist. His younger brother screamed in pain as he was kicked and was sent to the wall. Itachi looks like he doesn't care but on the inside, he was crying.
"I am so sorry for breaking your precious little arm little brother! Oh forgive for I am the cause of your suffering!"
Itachi was saddened when he had to use his mangekyou against his little brother. He didn't want to do it but he must. In order to protect his little brother. Jiraya, one of the sannin has summoned a jutsu where they are in frog's stomach. Yet successfully, Itachi and Kisame escaped. Poor Itachi. He didn't want to hurt his beloved little brother but he has too for the sake of it.
"My poor little brother!" he cried out. "I hope you do feel better!"
"Itachi sometimes I wish I won't have to see this..." Kisame sighed.
"So you would rather watch me eating Shark Fin Soup?" Itachi raised an eyebrow.
"Uh..want to lean on my shoulder? You can cry all you want."
"Shut up."
When Itachi heard the news that Sasuke left the village to seek help from Orochimaru, of course he was frustrated. Being a protective brother or rather a worried one at the moment he cried out,
"Oh no! Sasuke decided to seek power from that snake! Of all people it just has to be him! Who know what he will do to my little brother! And with his filthy tongue! Oh dear Kami he better not try to molest my brother! I don't want his disgusting freak near my brother! Oh why why why did I not kill that snake bastard?"
"I'm not even going to bother.." his partner, Kisame sighed and left Itachi and his paranoid mind.
"My little brother!"
Again, news spread like wildfire. When Itachi found out about Orochimaru's death and who was the cause of it, he was at the moment a proud brother. His eyes sparkled as he praised Sasuke.
"I can't believe it! My little brother actually killed Orochimaru! One of the sannin! Oh I am so proud right now! My little brother has gotten stronger!"
Of course, it was only thoughts. He still kept a stoic face in front of the Akatsuki.
Even in death, Itachi's soul was being overprotective. Watching him from heaven,
"My dear brother I must say you have gotten stronger! I'm so glad I got to poke your little forehead one last time! Oh dear what the fuck are you doing with Madara? Oh no Sasuke! He's even worse than that snake bastard! Shit! He's going to destroy the leaf? No Sasuke! I cannot approve this! Madara how dare you brainwash my little brother! It was a mission dammit! It's not the Hokage's fault! Damn you Madara! Ever heard of Rest in Peace?"
The End.