*Just letting you know, this story takes place in Hyrule, right after the events of LoZ: Twilight Princess.*
"What!? Go out with you? You've gotta be kidding me, Link," shouted Zelda.
"B-b-but… Zelda, w-w-why?" cried Link over his quiet whimpers. "I… You… How could you?"
~ 1 Hour ago. Hyrule Castle ~
Link opened a treasure chest, revealing a large key. Then, he groaned, "God, Midna. Do you know how Zelda gets in and out of this maze of a castle? This is goddamn annoying."
"How should I know? I just walk through walls. Can't you?" said Midna, giving a little Midna giggle.
"Finally, I go to the heart of the castle to get a key to enter the throne room located near the front of the castle. What kinda shit is this? Zelda should've given me a key," groaned Link, shoving the large door aside. There, in the throne, sat Zelda. "ZELDA! YOU ASS! GIMME A KEY NEXT TIME!"
Zelda sat silent and omnious. Suddenly, marks similar to the ones on the Ursper King, Zant started to glow all over her body. My god… thought Link. In a matter of seconds, Zelda got up, floating toward Link. "Hey, you've finally got the courage to ask- he was cut off by the unsheathing of her sword. "Dub me will ya? I'm good with tha-
"Kill… Sorry… You b… Ganon… don't… hurt… me…" murmered Zelda. Then, she readied to (as Link interpreted it) fight.
After repeated beatings, Zelda finally halted her assault of glowing hell balls. "Woohoo!" yelled Link. Then he proceeded to whoop Ganon's ass. As a futile attempt to even the playing field, he climbed out the window. Link followed Ganondorf and jumped out the window. He looked around… GOD! IT WAS THE ****ing COURTYARD OUTSIDE THE CASTLE! HE COULD'VE CLIMBED IN! Well, at least he got to Ganondorf. Following a long event of Ganondorf ass whooping, Link finally got a chance to see Midna's true form.
"God… she looks better than Seras Victoria," Link muttered under his breath.
"What, am I too beautiful for words to describe?" asked Midna, and Link nodded.
Sobs came from Link as Midna departed to the Twilit Realm.
~ Back to the Hyrule Field ~
"You beat me to a pulp with no remorse. Heck, you cheered yourself, you arrogant retard. Have you changed your clothes in the past few days? I didn't think so. Last time you took a dive was around the Zora Temple. And the money… you looted my treasure- YES I CHECK! EVERYDAY IN FACT! Yet, you're rich as hell. Gimme back my map and compass. Then, after, you're crying for Midna? She's from a different realm, I tell you, a DIFFERENT realm!" And with that, she left him, crying and single.