Until The Last Villain Falls
The Huntsman burst through the doors of the police station and went straight to the office of Lieutenant King, who sat at his desk carefully studying a newspaper.
"I'm here Lieutenant; I just saw the carnage outside and it's terrible" the former Marty Feeb announced. Before he gained his super powers the former hunter would have fled in terror instead of staring evil in the eye.
The policeman looked up from his work. "Oh, hello Huntsman. What are you doing here? We didn't sound the Horn of Urgency."
"You didn't have to, a little bird told me."
"Birds talk to you?"
"A lot of things talk to me...usually I don't pay them much mind. It looks like you need my help! What happened, Caveguy go on a rampage? Did Invisibo wreck havoc on the population when they weren't looking? Just tell me who it was and set me lose after them, I'm ready for some action. Are you searching that newspaper for vital information?"
"No, I'm just trying to solve this word jumble puzzle; what does 'TASSKEB' spell when you rearrange it? Oh, you mean outside; nothing happened, it's just an emergency preparedness drill. Those are people pretending to be victims out there."
"Pretend victims? People enjoy that? What kind of twisted world is this?" The superhero was pacing the floor.
"No, it's to help the police respond in the event it was a real emergency. You know, practice. It's been really slow the last month so we scheduled the drill. Didn't you get the text alert?"
"I live in the woods. I don't get a signal up there" the Huntsman lamented. "I don't even have a place to charge my battery. My cave doesn't have any outlets." He produced a phone with a dark screen from his tunic.
"Sorry about that, maybe since you're in town you can go to the theater and watch a movie or something."
"I can't; I got banned after an incident with the popcorn machine. Darn, darn the luck!"
"Thanks for showing up anyway. We'll call you when we need you."
The Huntsman stalked out of the police station. "I'm going to have a talk with a little bird" he said with a grimace as he kicked the doors open on the way out.
The End
A/N: With all of it's pop culture references and wacky humor, Freakazoid! was a cartoon show that disappeared too soon. The Huntsman was a short segment that appeared and was always anti-climatic for its lack of crime for the hero to battle. The voice was done in the style of Charlton Heston and the intro/outro theme was almost as long as the story, hence this short offering.