The doorbell rang unexpectedly while she was doing the dishes in the kitchen. Quickly she turned off the tap and wiped her hands on her jeans rushing to the door. A frown came on her face as she caught sight of the familiar car parked on the street.

It had been nearly 4 months since she had seen that car but even know seeing the car had given her butterflies. All she had to do know was open the door.

Taking a deep breath she unlocked the bolt and pulled open the door. Her worst fears were realized when she locked eyes with his.

Dean Winchester stood outside her door.

She hadn't seen him in four months; the one who still owned her heart despite having been the one to finally leave him. She had done it all to avoid anymore hurt. Perhaps she was selfish in her decision but she couldn't get hurt and she couldn't let him be hurt either. This was a decision that would reflect in their future.

"Jo,"

She sharply took a breath, her ribs aching from the sudden action. The way his raspy voice said her name brought back all the memories from before.

Their relationship had ended four months back but for her each moment that had passed had felt just as raw, just as fresh. Each wound inflicted was still tender.

"How are you?" He asked his green eyes softened with concern.

Jo smiled weakly, completely embarrassed by her appearance. She was sure she looked like the mess she was. Her hair was twisted upon her head and her eyeliner was still smudged from last night.

Her throat went dry as she tried to answer. She didn't even know what to say to him now. She was the one who had broken up with him but now seeing his face it seemed as if she was the only one still affected by it. "I'm—I'm fine."

He smiled at her then. "That's good, really good."

She nodded back. Her eyes were beginning to become moist and the last thing she wanted was to cry in front of him. She cleared her throat and smiled. "So um, how are you?"

"Good actually, really good." He smiled.

Jo nodded. "So what brings you by?"

Reluctantly he turned around and picked up a box from the doorstep. "I wanted to give you all this back."

Her breath caught in her throat as she glanced at the box he held. It looked familiar to her and when he handed it to her; she took one glance at the inside and sighed.

"My stuff." Her voice came out in a whisper.

He sighed. "I don't want to hurt you anymore but..."

"But?" Jo asked.

"I...think we need this to happen; in order to have a clean break. Our entire relationship has fit into this box and I want you to keep each memory of ours. I know how much everything means to you and I want you to have it all Jo."

She smiled weakly. "You want me to live day and night with these memories. Make me unable to move on. Being burdened with these memories."

"Are the memories burdens for you?" He asked with a frown.

She placed the box to the side on her front end table and shook her head. "Don't."

"Why not?" He frowned. "I thought everything meant more to you, which is why I wanted you to keep each memory of ours."

She didn't understand why instead of being happy she felt even worse. He was showing her he admired her faith in their relationship and for some reason it seemed to her like he was leaving her with the constant pain of his memories.

"You know what," Jo took a deep breath. "Leave. Just go and don't come back."

"Jo—don't. I need to explain."

"No Dean," she shook her head. "I don't want this to hurt anymore. I need things ended with us. You were right. A clean break. That's it."

She watched quietly as he turned around, no expression on his face and walked down to his car. She could feel her heart aching for him already. He was a habit to her maybe but whatever he was, he was special to her. He was her's. Things may have changed between them but the love she felt for him would never diminish.

She walked to her dinner table with the box, collapsing on the chair as she placed it on the table. She was going through a internal turmoil now. Should she go through the box and feel the pain even stronger than before or just hide the box and wait for the temptation to creep in later.

She slowly raised her hand letting it drop into the box. Her hand touched something soft and she pulled it out. A tiny little white plushie was in her hand. A red heart was etched on the left side of the bear; she slowly rubbed her thumb over the heart remembering the time he had bought her the bear and they had decided to get the heart placed on top rather than inside the bear.

She stood from the chair and gasped seeing a single white lily in the box. She delicately held the stem in her hand and sighed. It was a fresh flower, one that he must've dropped in the box before he came over to her house.

"He remembered," she whispered to herself. Lilies had been her favorite flower since forever and every time he had to apologize to her, he'd bring her a single lily just like he had done now.

"Jo!"

She turned around to see him coming towards her. They hadn't spoken for three days and today completely out of the blue he was chasing her around the university campus.

"What?" She growled at him.

Breathlessly he caught up to her and smiled cheekily; a smile that seemed to infuriate her more.

"What do you want?" She noticed his hands hidden behind his back.

"A smile." He grinned.

"That's cheesy."

"Rumor has it, you love romance."

"Really? And who told you that?" She crossed her arms.

He frowned before pulling a single white lily from behind his back. "The same person who told me you love lilies."

She smiled briefly taking the lily in between her fingers. "Thank you."

He smiled then and slid his hand around her waist.

That was the first time he had used the lily for her forgiveness and ever since then it had become unspoken that whenever he handed her a lily things were okay again.

She put the lily down on the table and turned away from it. The memories of the past slowly flooded her. All the happy times, the laughs, the hugs, the kisses but then the dark clouds rained down and other memories came into her mind. Memories that were more like nightmares; the fights, the hitting, the yelling and the tears.

She pushed away the thoughts in her mind and sighed feeling the single tear roll down her cheek. There were more tears that followed that one but everything that happened after that seemed like a blur to her. She collapsed on the kitchen tile in a curled up position. She didn't remember how long she lay there silently crying to herself. She knew it was pitiful the way she was handling the final end to her relationship with him but this was all she could do. This was all she had learned to do. Cry and let it all out of her body in the hope that soon everything would be okay again.

Maybe things would never be the same for her but she could lie there hoping for a better tomorrow. A tomorrow that was filled with happiness for her and everyone she loved.