A/N: So this is my sequel to "My Life Is a John Hughes Movie." If you haven't read that, this probably won't make much sense, but feel free to try anyway. There is a longer note at the end my lovelies, so read on!
Disclaimer: I did not create these characters, everything Twilight related belongs to Stephanie Meyer - I just borrowed the characters for my own ends, none of which included making money, so no legal action please!
/&/
They say you never forget your first love. They are unbelievably, painfully right. If I could forget him, it would be so much better, easier, but I can't. I tried, fooled myself into thinking I had succeeded, but it was an illusion. Which is why I don't mourn the loss of my second love with the passion and pain it deserves…he deserves. Because he only ever had a piece of my shattered heart. And I'm not sure I ever had a piece of his.
Phoenix was hot. The warmth soaked into my bones, made me sweat. The sun glared down at the defiance of my pale skin which refused to tan or burn. Leaving Jasper like I had was torture, Arizona my own personal hell. Renee was the one good thing in my life. She had held me as I sobbed out my pathetic story of unrequited love.
"Oh baby, I'm so sorry," she whispered, wiping the tears off my face and smoothing back my hair. She'd taken my cell phone, given me a big hug, and promised never to speak of him again. I know that he tried to call, heard her tell him not to call again. Alice called to, but my mom hung up on her. But G.G., she never called. I know she was only six, but I had held on to some small hope that she would want to talk to me, that she would make Jasper dial the number for her. But her call never came, and eventually Charlie stopped paying the bill. If losing Jasper had shattered my heart, losing G.G. was the big bully who stomped all over the pieces, reducing it to a pulp. She was my little sister, my daughter, my friend. The only person who had loved me for me, not because of biology, or what I could do for them. I felt horrible for leaving without ever saying goodbye, and I could only pray that she had forgiven me.
Finishing my high school career at a new school was a blessing. People left me alone. I had no friends, but I had no enemies. I made no emotional connections, unwilling to take a risk for fear of the potential pain. It wasn't until I stood alone on graduation day, surrounded by hugging, crying classmates, that I decided I had to change. I could not, would not, let my one-sided love for a teenage boy ruin the rest of my life.
I set off for UCLA that August determined to make friends.
So when a beautiful, Amazonian, blond girl sat down next to me in freshman English, stuck out her hand and smiled, I smiled back.
"Hi, I'm Bella," I said, taking her hand.
"Rosalie," she told me. An attractive boy loped up the steps and sat down next to her.
"What are you doing?" she asked him sweetly. He looked confused.
"Well, I…" he trailed off as he caught her icy expression, so at odds with her voice.
"You were just leaving? How sad. Buh-bye," she stated dryly as Abercrombie boy tripped over his own feet trying to get away. I giggled, and then choked on my own breath when I realized it had been almost two years since the last time I'd laughed.
"Are you okay?" Rosalie was grinning, proud of herself.
"Yep," I gasped out, "I am." And for the first time in a long time I actually meant it.
Meeting Rosalie changed my life. She was vivacious, witty, slightly bi-polar, and completely loyal. Her friendship filled my life, reanimated the shell I'd become.
Meeting Rosalie changed my life because she led me to him.
And he…he taught me how to be happy again.
It was not love at first sight. To call it that would be foolish. And a lie. I was too scarred and scared by love to jump into it based on something as intangible as the meeting of our eyes, a shared moment. And, I would soon learn, so was he.
It was the beginning of our sophomore year, and Rosalie had dragged me to some party in hopes of catching the attention of Emmett, and then ignoring him and playing hard to get. Never one for large groups of people, despite my new resolve to make friends and live life, I wandered away from the teeming mass of tipsy co-eds and into a dark, empty room. Shutting the door behind me with a soft click, I used the moonlight to guide my steps to the window seat. I tucked my legs underneath me, staring out into the night. Loud music was playing elsewhere in the house, people were talking and laughing, but all that was muffled in this space. It was…peaceful. I sighed deeply, trying to breathe out the stress of the day.
"Tha'ss a big ssigh for such a little perssson," the words we soft, slurred, melodic. I gasped and turned my head sharply in the direction of the voice. There, slumped against a closed piano, was a dark shape.
"I thought I was alone," I muttered when my heartbeat returned to some semblance of normal.
"Ssooooo sssorry," he shifted to look at me. As he moved I saw he was holding a mostly empty bottle I recognized as Jack Daniels.
"You're drunk…" distaste colored my voice.
"Little but sssmart," he grinned sloppily, saluting me with the bottle of Jack. He shifted again, and this time this face was bathed in the pale glow that shone through the window. He was pale, almost iridescent in this light, with a high forehead and unruly bronze hair. There is a strange beauty to him, I thought to myself, timeless, rebellious. And then my eyes met his. They were moss green and surprisingly clear for someone so obviously intoxicated. Those eyes held so much pain, the kind that only comes from losing a love, a pain I was all too familiar with. He never told me what he saw in my eyes that night, I can only guess that he recognized a kindred spirit…a person who had walked along the road to heartbreak and somehow survived. Whatever it was, he lurched upward and moved unsteadily toward me. He dropped the bottle, which made a dull thud on the carpeted floor, and knelt in front of me, placing his hands on either side of my legs.
"It will go away, right?" he mumbled, not really asking me, staring at some invisible spot on my forehead.
"Never," I whispered. I didn't think he'd hear me, but the soft, bitter laugh he emitted let me know I'd been wrong.
"What's your name, little one?" his eyes traveled my face, as if memorizing every curve, every shadow.
"Bella," I breathed out, unsure why I was still sitting here, why I was revealing my name to a drunken stranger.
"Beautiful…" he whispered, closing his eyes.
"Your name?" I prompted him. He opened one eye and regarded me carefully, opening his mouth to answer.
The strains of Clair de Lune spilled into the space between us, breaking the spell of silence that had woven around us. It startled me, and I fumbled to get my phone out of my pocket. The stranger in front of me furrowed his brow, as if confused by my choice of ringtone.
"Yes?" I asked, breathless.
"I'm ready to go," Rosalie said crisply. I could tell from her tone that things had not gone as she'd planned.
"I'll meet you out front," I said hastily, snapping my phone shut. I stood up and regarded the man in front of me. "It was nice meeting you…" I paused, waiting for his name, but it never came. I nudged his arm with my knee, and he moved it without protest. I walked quickly across the room, slipping out the door and shutting it softly behind me. I wove in and out of groups of people, some more rowdy than others, my eyes searching for Emmett. Despite the cat and mouse game they were currently playing, I knew Emmett and Rosalie were meant to be, which made him the only person at this party I could go to.
Luckily, he was at least a head taller than almost everybody, and I found him standing by the window in the front room, trying to look as if he wasn't watching Rosalie on the front lawn.
"Em…" I was cut off when he scooped me into his arms for a bear hug.
"Rosie said you were here, but I didn't see you!" he exclaimed, regarding me fondly.
"Yeah, I actually ran into a…guy…in this room in the back of the house. He's had at least a fifth of Jack, and I'm a little worried about him. Rosalie wants to go…is there any way you can check on him…maybe make sure he makes it home safe?" I asked, smiling and trying to look as if this were the sort of thing I asked for all the time.
"Are you okay?" he cast a concerned look over me, but must have decided that my unruffled appearance and nod of assent were enough proof that I had not been taken advantage of. "Yeah, I can make sure he gets home, I was gonna leave as soon as you ladies did anyway," he grinned at me slyly, "But don't you dare tell Rosie on me!"
"Thanks Em!" I hugged him once more and then headed outside to meet Rosalie. I had no idea that my whole life had just been changed.
It was only two days before I saw him again. Rosalie and I were sitting in the commons, studying between classes, when Emmett wandered up and intruded on our peace and quiet.
"How did you do it Bella?" Emmett rumbled, plopping down next to Rosalie. She glared at him but didn't say anything.
"Do what, exactly?" I asked him, confused.
"Manage to meet the incomparable Edward Cullen during the first and only time he's ever been drunk," Emmett was grinning, pleased with himself.
"You knew that guy?" I gaped at him.
"It's possible he is my annoyingly perfect cousin who has lived with my family since he was five, but I don't normally claim him," Emmett explained, "I only took him to that party because I couldn't stand to look at that depressed mug of his for another day."
"Why is he annoying?" I asked before I could stop myself.
Emmett sighed, "He's, like, this music prodigy who never misbehaves, and we're the same age, and my parents always want me to be more proper. 'Like Edward.'"
"How come we've never seen him before?" Rosalie interjected suspiciously.
"UCLA is big school," Emmett spoke slowly, as if to a child, "it is possible that you don't know every student on this campus."
Rosalie opened her mouth to unleash what I could only imagine was a scathing retort but I cut her off. "Is he okay?" I asked.
"Back to his normal, sober, brooding self," Emmett pouted.
"Why is he brooding?" I wasn't sure why I cared, but I did.
"Well," Emmett looked uncomfortable for a second, but then his face brightened. "You should probably just talk to him about that," he grinned at me, then started waving like a maniac at somebody over my shoulder. "Hey, Eddie! Come 'ere, I got someone you need ta meet!" he called out, drawing the attention of the entire food court.
I resisted the urge to look behind me, waited for him to make his way over to us.
"Emmett, I have asked you not to call me that," his voice was smooth, disciplined.
"You'll get over it," Emmett rolled his eyes, "This is my girl Rosie, and I believe you met Bella…or should I call her 'little one'?"
A slight blush stained his cheeks as he nodded at us. "I am Edward, it's very nice to meet both of you," he sounded stiff and formal.
"Pop a squat cuz, we don't bite," Emmett was gleeful in the face of Edward's embarrassment.
"Actually, I have a practice room reserved in fifteen minutes, so I'm afraid I cannot stay," Edward did not look at all sorry that he couldn't stay.
Rosalie had remained silent for a while, but now she chimed in, "Bella has a class in the music building, you can walk her."
It was my turn to blush, and I glared at Rosalie's innocent little smile.
"I would be pleased to escort you to class," Edward said, holding out a hand to assist me.
I took it and rose from my seat, grabbing my backpack. He was so proper I felt like I should curtsy.
We walked silently away from Rosalie and Emmett. "You don't really have to do this," I said once we were out of the common area.
"No, I do. I would like apologize for my behavior on Saturday," Edward's voice was emotionless and it tickled at the edge of my brain, reminding me of another voice that had once been so similar.
"It's okay," I mumbled, not wanting to think about the memories tearing at the wall I'd built around them.
"No, a gentleman should never be intoxicated in front of a lady," he stated simply.
"Well, then, I guess I forgive you," I murmured. We continued in silence for a little while longer before curiosity got the best of me.
"If you're a musical prodigy like Emmett says, why are you at UCLA and not some fancy arts school?" I asked him.
"I was, but," he paused then, and swallowed hard, "I needed a change of scenery."
"I know the feeling," I replied.
Edward contemplated me for a moment, then gave me a small smile, "Yes, I rather think you do."
I tore my eyes away from his and searched for a safer topic of conversation. "So what do you play?" I asked him.
"Piano, what class are you taking?" he responded.
"Choir, it was that or a physical ed credit. I opted for music to ensure the continued health of my fellow students," I told him.
He gave me a half smile, and I congratulated myself for making the shadows in his eyes dim, even just for a moment.
That first day set the pattern for the rest of the semester. Edward walked me to choir every Monday and Wednesday. We talked about art, politics, religion, pop culture, anything but the details of our doomed relationships. And by the time the semester had ended, Emmett and Rosalie were an official couple, which meant that Edward and I spent most weekends together by default.
"Tell me again why you and Edward aren't dating?" Rosalie queried.
I sighed and plopped myself down on her bed.
"I don't…its complicated," I answered finally.
Rosalie raised an eyebrow, turning to look at me, "Does that mean you would, under the right circumstances?"
"That means I find him attractive, and I like spending time with him, and there could be chemistry, but I'm afraid and he's afraid…" I told her.
"Which is why you guys do everything a couple would do, except for the physical?" Rosalie asked.
"I think he wanted to kiss me once," I murmured, blushing, "but I've never been kissed and I…"
"Stop right there!" Rosalie interrupted, "How have we known each other for almost two years and you never mentioned that little factoid?"
"It never came up?" I tried to sound innocent.
"So in all our heart-to-hearts about life, most especially boys, including Jasper, you never once thought, 'gee, Rosalie might find it interesting that I've never kissed a boy,'" Rosalie narrowed her eyes at me.
"It's embarrassing," I mumbled, chewing my lip.
"If he ever tries again, you better let him, or so help me…" Rosalie apparently couldn't think of anything horrible enough to do to me.
I was saved from answering by a knock on the door. "That'll be Em," I grinned at her, "I better go make him wait for you."
I shut her bedroom door on my way to get Emmett.
"She's not quite ready yet," I said, and he smirked at me, because he was well aware that Rosalie was just trying to make an entrance.
"Edward wants to take you somewhere, he told me to tell you 'dress warm and be ready in fifteen'" Emmett winked suggestively.
I rolled my eyes at him and headed to my room to change. Exactly 15 minutes later Edward was at my door. He knocked, but didn't wait for me to open it for him.
"Are you ready?" he was flushed from excitement and I wondered what he had up his sleeve.
"Yep," I grabbed my jacket and followed him out the door.
"My lady," he gave a goofy little bow and offered me his arm.
"Why, thank you kind sir," I giggled, letting him escort me down the stairs and outside.
"Where are we going?" I asked when he led me right past his car.
"It's such a pretty night, I thought we'd walk," he gave me a crooked little smile.
It was chilly for California, but the night sky was unusually clear of smog and the stars were making a rare appearance.
"It is nice out," I sighed, walking with my head tilted back as I gazed up at the twinkling lights.
"Don't trip," Edward teased.
"Even if I did, you'd never let me fall," I stated simply.
"Never," he agreed softly. There was so much more than a promise not to let me trip in that one quiet word.
We walked on in silence, comfortable in each other's presence.
"What are we doing here?" I eyed him speculatively when he stopped in front the Schoenberg Music Building.
"Just wait," he smiled mysteriously, opening the door and ushering me inside. The halls he lead me down were dim, and somewhere in a practice room, someone was practiced her arias.
"Have they ever considered filming a horror movie in this building, cause I really think it could work," I whispered, shivering a little.
He chuckled softly, bringing us to a stop in front of a dark practice room. He pulled out a key and opened the door for me.
"Have a seat," Edward pulled out the piano bench and gestured for me to sit on one side of it.
Once I was seated he settled down next to me.
"Where's your music?" I asked him as he slid back the cover.
"Don't need it," he replied. He flexed his fingers and settled them on the ivory keys.
He played a song I'd never heard before. It started out dark and painful and slowly grew peaceful, even happy. It shouldn't have worked, the beginning and end were so opposite and yet somehow they blended in the middle. I sat silent when he finished, trying to block out the sound of our breath, straining to hear the last echoes of the music.
"That was beautiful," I sniffed, surprised to realize there were tears in my eyes.
Edward reached up and wiped one away, his thumb lingering on my cheek.
"I wrote it for you," he blushed, but held my eyes.
"I don't know what to say…" I stammered, then added softly, "Thank you."
"It's us, our journey, what we were when we met, what we are now," he whispered.
There was a lump in my throat and I was worried I would start bawling any minute, so I said the only thing that came to my mind.
"Rosalie thinks we should kiss," I blurted out. "Oh my god!" I gasped, covering my face with my hands, not sure if I should laugh or cry.
"What do you think?" he asked quietly.
I peeked between my fingers and saw that he had his little crooked smile and didn't look completely disgusted with me.
"I think…I think we could try it…" I dropped my hands down to twist in my lap.
"I think you're right," he brought his hand up to my chin, tilting my head up slightly. His lips were almost cool where they met mine, and firmer than I had thought they would be. It was everything a first kiss should be, gentle, sweet, and over way too quickly.
"That was nice," I murmured, feeling a little funny.
"Just nice?" Edward raised an eyebrow at me.
"Better than nice," I blushed, smiling.
"We should probably do it again sometime," he said.
"Okay, yeah." I replied, heart racing. I felt flushed and slightly awkward, and excited and a little like I wanted to squeal and jump up and down with Rosalie.
"So…" he started, but a loud pounding on the door interrupted him.
"Building's closed now," the janitor yelled.
"I guess we'd better go," Edward stood and offered me his hand. He helped me up, but didn't let go.
We walked all the way back to my apartment silently holding hands.
It took me five years, but I thought I was finally normal. And so, I thought, was he. I was wrong.
We were sitting in a park down the street from where we lived, both ignoring the fact that I was graduating in two days, enjoying our limited time together before I left for Phoenix
"You remind me of a vampire," I said to him, glancing up from my book. I was sprawled in the sun on a blanket; he was huddled under a tree in the shade.
His head lifted, a perplexed look on his face, "Really? Why?"
"You know, you're so pale, and you stick to the shadows, and there is no denying you have nocturnal tendencies," I teased.
"Pale...pshh, this from the girl who practically glows white in the sunlight?" he smirked at me.
"Hey, at least I try," I taunted, "You act like you might disintegrate if the sun's rays touch you."
"He wasn't always that way," a female voice spoke softly behind him.
Edward's eyes widened and he stiffened. He turned towards her slowly, as if the movement took incredible effort.
She took a step closer and I could make out her features. Dark hair, my height, clear blue eyes, lightly tanned. Absolutely nothing like the girl Emmett had described to me as Edward's lost love.
"Kate," Edward ground out the name, "What are you doing here?"
I gaped silently at him; he had never been so rude in my presence before. Kate just ignored him, smiling sunnily at me.
"You must be Bella," she beamed, "Emmett's told me so much about you!"
"I'm sorry, you have me a little confused, because although you apparently know who I am, I have no idea who you are," I said.
"I'm gonna kill him," Edward muttered under his breath. "Is anyone with you?" he asked Kate, his tone brittle.
"Yep, the whole clan has descended upon this fair city," she grinned.
"The whole clan?" he swallowed hard and looked a little like he wanted to cry.
"Well, everyone except…" she trailed off, her face suddenly serious.
He nodded absently, his mind clearly miles away. Kate bounced over to me and pulled me into her arms. "I'm so excited to meet you!" she squealed.
Her energy reminded me of Alice, the good qualities that I had loved so much about her before…before. "Thank you," she whispered in my ear.
"For?" I inquired, but she just smiled mysteriously and backed away.
"C'mon you guys!" she grabbed my arm and dragged me to where Edward was standing. She grasped his arm as well and started tugging us across the street. I glanced at Edward for some hint as to what the heck was going on, but his stony gaze was focused straight ahead, the muscles in his jaw working furiously.
"Can you please explain what's going on to me?" I hissed at Emmett, pulling him away from the huge group of people Kate had led us to, gathered in the courtyard of our apartment building.
"I have company," Emmett grinned, being deliberately obtuse.
"No, I mean, who are these people, and why is Edward glaring at Kate all afternoon?" I demanded.
"This is Tanya's family. They were our next door neighbors in Chicago. We all grew up together," Emmett explained.
"But I don't see Tanya," I gasped, surprised.
"She and her husband aren't here," Emmett grimaced, "And as for Edward's bad attitude, Kate is the one who told Edward that Tanya had run off with another guy. I think he blames her."
"Wow, when you guys keep secrets, they're doozies," I breathed, studying Edward. He was in conversation with what had to be Kate and Tanya's mother, but he was glaring stonily at Kate, who was deep in conversation with Rosalie.
"What are we going to do?" I murmured. I could see that for all Edward was putting up an angry façade, he was hurting. Pain, betrayal, loss, bewilderment, they were all there in his eyes.
"Nothing, Edward needs to realize that he can still have relationships with these people. He cut them all off when Tanya left, and it wasn't fair to them," Emmett muttered darkly.
I felt a twinge of guilt, hadn't I done the same thing to G.G. when I'd left Forks five years ago? I shook off the tendrils of pain that were trying to unfurl in my ribcage.
"Did you know they were coming?" I eyed him suspiciously.
"Yep, they are here to see me graduate, and to check out the campus. Kate's probably going to transfer here," Emmett told me, waving cheerfully in response to Edward's scowl. "He's got the hearing of a bat," he whispered through his teeth.
"Or a vampire," I stated dryly.
Tanya's family went to their hotel, but Rosalie and I convinced Kate to stay with us in our apartment.
"Are you sure it's okay?" Kate had asked, but we both assured her that if Edward wanted to be a butt head, he could just stay away from us for the night.
"I feel like I'm in high school again," Kate said, coming out of the bathroom in her pajamas.
"I rarely did the sleepover thing in high school," I said frankly, "I wasn't very popular."
"Neither did I," Rosalie added, "I think most of the girls in my class were too intimidated, or jealous."
"Tanya and I would always have sleepovers with Irena, and Emmett and Edward would have Garrett over for 'guy's night.' But it was really just an excuse for the six of us to hang out together overnight. I like to think its how Irena and Garrett fell in love," Kate chirped.
"But the three of you were closer?" I prompted, "You, Tanya and Edward, I mean?"
"Yeah," Kate sighed wistfully, "At least, until they started dating senior year."
"Emmett said you helped Tanya elope?" Rosalie queried. I looked up, startled. Nobody tells me anything!
"Mmmm..yes," Kate gazed at me thoughtfully, and then continued, "I knew that Tanya loved Edward, but she wasn't in love with him. And Edward wasn't in love with her either."
I opened my mouth to protest, but Kate stopped me.
"I know you met him right after it happened. And I don't doubt that he was hurt, devastated even, but you don't know him like I do. He loved her because he thought he should, because it fit into his perfect plan for his perfect life. Marrying the girl next door. But there was no passion. I couldn't sit by and watch them both live a life without passion. So yeah, I not only helped her elope, I'm the person who introduced her to Aiden."
Rosalie and I shared a look, but I kept my mouth shut this time. Kate was focusing on a spot on our wall, speaking mechanically now, "Edward might hate me for the rest of his life, but I know I did the right thing. Besides," Kate shook herself and smiled at me, "He found you, right?" The words seemed to hang in the air, hollow and false.
"Oh my god," Rosalie blurted out, "You're in love with him!"
"Don't be ridiculous," Kate protested, eyeing me warily.
"Its okay," I murmured, "I'm not mad." And I wasn't. What right had I to be mad at her for loving him? She had more right to him than I did. And she could love him with her whole heart, not like me. He would never have my whole heart.
I had never seen Rosalie look so lost, "Does Edward know all this?" she asked.
"He doesn't know why, but he knows the part I played," Kate whispered, "And he hates me for it."
"No, I don't think he does," I told her, "I don't think he can."
"What are you going to do about this?" Rosalie whispered to me once Kate was asleep.
"What can I do? I love him, but, I'm not in love with him, not like she is. And judging by the way he watched her all day, he has stronger feelings for her than he realizes," I whispered back.
"Why did you guys date for so long, if you're not in love?" Rosalie hissed.
"It was comfortable, and we both knew that there was no chance Jasper or Tanya would come back into our lives…and the kissing wasn't bad either," I admitted.
"I just…I can't believe I didn't know," Rosalie sighed sadly.
"Well, really, how I supposed to break that to you? 'Oh, by the way, Edward and I aren't in love, what do you want for dinner?'" I said lightly.
"Are you going to break up with him?" Rosalie asked softly.
"I think I have to," I felt a tear slide down my cheek. I brushed it away quickly and flopped over to bury my face in my pillow. My "Good night," was muffled, but I heard Rosalie's answering whisper before I drifted off into fitful dreams.
The next day was one long block of awkward. Emmett had invited everyone over to his and Edward's apartment. Garrett was blissfully unaware of the undercurrent of tension in the air, but they rest of us were walking on eggshells, verbally at least. Irina glared at Edward in frustration – it was obvious that she knew Kate was in love with him. Rosalie kept switching back and forth between Kate and me with her sympathetic looks. Emmett seemed to have finally realized that his plotting to reconcile Edward with Tanya's family was not his best idea ever. I stayed close to Kate, I didn't know what to say to Edward and I knew he wouldn't risk having to talk to Kate to get me on my own. And Edward…it hurt my heart to see him so…lost. His face was a stoic mask, but every time his eyes flickered toward Kate I saw the betrayal and pain hidden in their depths.
"He's never going to forgive me," Kate whispered miserably after Edward shot a particularly bitter look her way.
"Trust me, you wouldn't have to power to hurt him so much if his feelings weren't stronger for you than he realizes," I told her quietly.
"Why are you helping me again?" her smiled trembled and she looked closed to tears.
"Because I know what it is to love someone in vain, and I don't want that for you," I murmured, "Or him."
"I need to get out of this room," her voice was strained and I could tell she was about to break.
"I'll cover for you, take a walk outside," I said. Kate rose gracefully and walked quickly out the door. I watched Edward, and his eyes followed every step she took. His body leaned momentarily in the direction she's gone, as if someone was holding him back from going after her.
"Come with me," I ordered him softly, threading my arm through his and leading him outside.
"Is something wrong?" Edward regarded me with concern.
"Yes," I stated simply, "You're unhappy, and I hate to see you that way."
"I…" Edward gazed at me helplessly.
"I know seeing these people brings back memories of what happened with Tanya, and Lord knows I am in no position to judge you for not being over it yet, but I do think you should give Kate a chance to explain," I held my breath and waited for his reaction.
His shoulders slumped, as if the strain of staying calm had finally gotten to be too much.
"I know," was all he said. I threw myself into his arms and squeezed as tightly as possible.
"Go talk to her," I gently nudged him towards Kate's wraith-like figure in the distance.
I wandered slowly back to my own apartment, contemplating what sort of personality disorder I had that made me push the men I love at other women.
I was stretched out on the couch, trying to relax and stop thinking, when my cell phone started playing "Bad Boys." Charlie, I smiled, it was so rare that he called me and I got hear the song.
I answered it quickly, "Hey Dad!"
"Bella, hey, uh, I have someone here who wants to talk to you," he sounded distressed.
"What's the matter?" I frowned at the little picture of Charlie on the TV stand.
There was a muffled noise and then a girl's voice came on the line.
"Bella?" the voice sounded small and unsure, but I still recognized it. My heart stopped beating, and yet something was thundering in my ears.
"G.G.?" I somehow forced out. It had been five years since I'd spoken to her, heard her speak, and although she had to be eleven, almost twelve now, she sounded achingly familiar.
"Yes, I didn't know if you would remember me," she sounded close to tears.
"I could never…" my throat felt tight.
"I need you…we need you, I think Jazzy's gonna do something stupid and you hafta help us!" she sounded like she'd been crying.
"What do you mean?" I urged, but there was fumbling noise again and Charlie came back on.
"I think you should come home, I mean, after graduation of course," Charlie said seriously.
"I'll be there as soon as I can get a flight," I vowed, hanging up the phone.
I was completely still for a moment, letting the shock of hearing G.G.'s voice settle in, then I sprang into action.
What the heck is going on? How did G.G. even get to Charlie's house? What stupid thing is Jasper contemplating? My mind raced wildly as I stuffed clothes into a suitcase with one hand and looked for flights on my phone with the other.
I ran into Edward, literally, as I burst out of the bathroom, shampoo in hand.
"I have to go home, to Forks, tonight, G.G. and Jasper need me," I babbled at the exact same time as Edward practically shouted, "I kissed Kate!"
"Wait, what?" we said in unison, "I…"
"You go first," I told him.
"I…one minute we were shouting at each other, and the next I couldn't contain myself, I just grabbed her, and…kissed her…and it was weird and wonderful and I'm so sorry," he confessed.
"I think I knew something like that would happen when I sent her to you," I said softly, "and, don't worry, I'm not mad. I think if we're honest with each other, we were really just best friends who made out occasionally."
"It sounds awful when you say it that way," he smiled ruefully. His face turned serious, "You said you have to go to Forks?"
"Yeah, Charlie and G.G. just called me," I sighed, "I don't even know what's going on, but for Charlie to be worried about Jasper, I know it has to be serious."
"You aren't going to wait until after the graduation ceremony tomorrow?" I shook my head to the negative, "Do you need me to come with you?" Edward asked, "After all, I am still technically your boyfriend."
"I appreciate the offer, but I think you have enough to deal with here," I sniffed, trying to keep my tears at bay.
"I will always, always be there for you if you need me," he stated quietly, pulling me in for a hug.
"I know, and I love you for it," I told him.
"I love you too," he whispered into my hair.
"Can you drive me to the airport?" I asked him, pulling out of his embrace and heading back to my bedroom to finish packing.
"No problem," he answered.
I grabbed my suitcase and backpack, mentally checking off all the things I might need.
"Tell Rosalie what happened, and that I will call her as soon as I can with more details," I instructed Edward as he lifted my suitcase and held the door open for me.
He nodded as I walked past him, locking the door behind me.
I paused and took a deep breath, preparing myself, and then walked away from my present life and plunged headfirst into my past.