Alright, so this has been a one-shot I have wanted to do for a while, but never got to it. My sister and I thought of it one night when we saw a hilarious FMA samurai pizza cats video, so now I thought I should make this fic and make it come alive...I sound pretty evil there don't I? MWHAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!
It was Friday night at the Central Headquarters and Roy was starting to get a headache from all the idiots and paperwork he had to deal with. "Hey Ed, do you have any aspirin with you?"
Edward looked at Roy and shook his head. "No, but I could give your head a massage. I bet that would make your head feel better." Roy nodded his head in eagerness.
He walked over to Roy to stand behind him. He put his fingers on Roy's temples and started to make small, smooth circles with his fingers. "Maybe, you should just take the rest of the night of and watch some movies and just relax."
Roy shook his head. "I don't want to deal with an angry Riza." Edward stopped massaging his head and bent down to kiss his neck softly. "Don't worry. I'll deal with her, so just go home right now and pick out what kind of movie you want to watch." Roy frowned.
"I already know what I want to watch Ed, and you know it's your favorite." Edward shook his head immediately. "No, no, no, no, NO!" Roy cringed at Edward's booming voice.
"Sorry, but no is no Roy. Pick out something out different then the 'Samurai Pizza Cats'" Roy pouted. When Edward turned away from him, he spun Edward around so that Ed could see his puppy dog eyes fully.
"C'mon Ed! You know I love that show and we haven't watched it in forever! Besides you said I could pick out anything I wanted to watch." Edward gave him a disbelieving look.
"Okay, okay. So maybe you said movie , but still I really want to watch this with you!" For the last time Edward shook his head. "No, Roy and I mean it." Just then Roy's nightmare, Saya, came in along with Edward's brother Alphonse.
Roy's pout turned into a scowl and Edward snickered. Saya waved at Edward, but glared at Roy. Edward and Al rolled their eyes at the two. Sometimes it was amazing that they didn't kill each other when in the same room.
Saya broke her glare to ask "So, Mustang, what were you and Edward arguing about?"
"None of your business." Roy snapped. "Hey, got a piece of advice for you. Pull the stick out of your ass." Saya always seemed to have a comeback for Roy every time she saw him, which was every day.
Roy folded his arms across his chest. "Fine, if you must know...I have a headache and Edward suggested that I go home and pick out a movie for him and I to watch, but I want to watch my Samurai Pizza Cats collection, but he doesn't. Which I don't know why because Samurai Pizza Cats are awesome!"
Saya's eyes widened and without any warning started to squeal with delight. "Oh mi God!! Finally someone in this military base loves the Samurai Pizza Cat's! I can't find anybody! What's your favorite character?"
"Guido Anchovy. He may not be good with the ladies as I am, but he's a smooth talker and that's good enough for me. What's yours?" Saya's eyes sparkled and just then she looked like a little girl who was revealing all her secrets to her best friend.
"Polly Esther. She's so independent and she isn't afraid to say what's on her mind. You know what we should do? Have a Samurai Pizza Cats sleepover tonight!" Roy's eyes widened with excitement.
"We totally should! I have all the seasons, so all you need to do is bring the popcorn!" She nodded her head."Yeah, and then we could do each others nails! I'm going to go home right now and get everything packed!" They both squealed with delight and jumped up and down.
Meanwhile Alphonse was looking at his brother with scared eyes. "Brother, should we be afraid that they are getting along?" Edward gulped and nodded. "Yes Al. Be very afraid because right now I am scared of the side effects of them getting along. Can I stay at your place tonight?"
"Yes. Yes you can. Let's go right now. I don't know what would happen if they hug." Edward's expression looked like he wanted to cry as Al and him ran like hell out of the headquarters.
"Well that's it." Edward said as he slammed his suitcase close. "Now let's get out of here before your girlfriend comes!" They rushed downstairs and was instantly met with a squealing Saya and Roy. They sneaked behind them and ran out of the door.
"That was too close brother! They could have made us join in thier little love festival!" Al yelled as they got into the car and back out of the driveway.
"I know that Al!" He yelled back. "We're out of there now, so we're safe." After a moment of silence Al turned to look at his brother with evil eyes.
"Do you want to go back there at night to spy on them?" Edward smirked at his brother. "You read my mind completely."
That night Edward and Al quietly sneaked through the door and hid behind the wall listening and watching what Saya and Roy were doing. There were already done with the whole series and now they settled on watching TV and painting each others nails, just like they had planned.
Roy was painting Saya's toenails in a beautiful majenta color. "So, Saya, how have you and Al been doing?" Roy asked, while not taking his eyes off her toes. She smiled.
"Amazing. He's an amazing guy. Ed's lucky to have him as a brother." Roy nodded and smiled. Ed always knew he was lucky to have him as a brother, though if you knew him enough you would know that Edward was lucky enough just to have Al right there by his side every day. They were the closest brothers he has ever seen.
"So, how are you and Edward doing?" Roy smiled a breathtaking smile. "Wonderful I guess. We haven't tried to kill eachother in the past week. So that's good, but I guess all good has to come to an end."
Saya's smile disappeared. "What do you mean? You aren't going to break up with him are you?" Roy shook his head. "No! Not at all! Why would I do that?" Behind the wall Edward let out a sigh of relief. Roy may not have know it, but he loved the man dearly.
"I have to send him on a mission soon and I don't really want him to go on this one. There it's done." Roy put the brush back in the glass. Saya took a minute to admire the work before focusing on the matter at hand.
"Why don't you want him to go?" Roy sighed and sat with his back against the couch. "This may sound very cliched coming from a man like me, but here it goes. The truth is I don't want him to go on any missions unless he has another person by his side ready to help him in case he gets hurt or seriously injured. People don't know Ed like I do. People think that he doesn't have a weakness and that he's indescrutable, but I know better. Have you ever seen Ed after he has come back from just one mission?" Saya shook her head because in truth she hasn't. They are really good friends, but she's never seen him after he's came back from a mission.
"He looks terrible and weak and I hate to see him like that. His face will be so pale that his golden eyes shine bright against it. He's so tired that he just wants to crash on the floor. I wish I can be there with him when he goes on these missions just to see what gets him like that." Saya reached out and put a hand on his knee.
"I know how you feel Roy. I wish I could do the same with Alphonse, but I just have to keep on saying that he's going to make it back alive and you know what? He always does come back safe."
Roy looked at Saya with a smiled. "Yeah, I know. I just wish he was safer on his missions, you know what I mean?" She nodded. "I do. I really do." Roy waved his hand as if to let this conversation go.
"So, I know this is going to be a major change in talk, but how is your sex life going?" She laughed. "Well...umm...great. I had to show him what to do at first, but then he got the hang of it and it was amazing!" Roy chuckled.
"Well it's nice to see that one of the Elric brothers is dominant. Edward never takes over." Behind the wall Edward's eye twitched while Al just tried not to snicker. How could Roy go from sweet to being a bastard and maybe Edward could switch it up if Roy didn't have such a big ego!
Saya looked at the clocked and yawned. "I think we should go to bed. We have to go to work in the morning." Roy shrugged."Let's take the day off tomorrow and just stay here."
"Okay, but you have to call in." Roy nodded in agreement. "Okay. Deal." When both of them got up, Edward and Al were already out the door and into the truck.
Before Edward started the engine he looked at Alphonse and said "Well that wasn't the conversation I expected." Al just nodded his head quickly. "You read my mind. C'mon let's go home. I don't know if I am going to go to bed soon. The image of Roy doing Saya's nails is just too weird." He shruddered and Edward snickered.
On the way home something in the back of Al's mind would not die down. "Hey Ed? Are you going to go on the mission this time?" Edward shrugged. "Maybe. I don't want to make that decision right now." Al stayed silent for the rest of the ride.
The next morning Edward woke up before Al. He left Al a note that he left before he woke up. He had to find out if everything was okay at home and find out about this mission. Once he was at home he put the truck in park and walked inside. Once inside the sweet scent of cinnamon filled his nostrils.
He followed the trail into the kitchen and to his amazement Saya and Roy were cooking together. To bad Al wasn't here to see this! "Well I thought the kindness between you two wouldn't last all night, but apparently I am wrong."
Roy and Saya both jumped at his voice. "Edward! What are you doing home so early? And where's Al?" Saya asked, noticing the missing body by his side.
"He was still out cold. I didn't have the heart to wake him. So he should be there when you leave."Edward looked at Roy who was staring at him.(Creeper....) "Edward, I know you just got back, but can I talk to you?" He looked at Saya, who got the drift immediately. "I'm just going to go take a shower." She dashed up the stairs, leaving the room in an awkward silence.
"What did you want to talk to me about?" Edward asked, knowing very well what this was about. "I have a mission for you. You leave next week, but the thing is...this mission if very dangerous. There's a gang of alchemist hiding up in the north mountains. These aren't regular alchemists. They fight dirty, way dirtier then you play. You'll always be going on your own. I'll fill you on the rest of the details tommorow."
Edward sighed. "You don't want me to go do you?"
After a moment of more awkward silence. Roy shook his head. "No, Ed, I don't want you to go. I hate it when you are on your own and unprotected, but orders are orders I guess." Edward walked over to the table and sat down. He patted the chair next to him. "C'mon. Sit." Roy turned off the oven and went over to sit by Ed.
"I don't have to go you know. I can always stay here. I'll talk to the Fuher and say that my brother has fallen ill and I need to take that time to take care of him."
Roy shook his head. "That won't work Ed. You know the Fuher is smarter then that." Edward shrugged.
"I can be very persuassive. He won't even know that I am lying." Roy gave Ed a chaste kiss before smiling. "I know you can be. So, how was your night with Al?"
Edward had flashbacks of Roy painting Sayas toenails and snickered. "It was a good night. We went to the movies and then went out to eat. How was your night?"
"Amazing! We watched the whole entire series in like an hour then we painted each others nails and then we talked! I sound like a girly girl dont I?"
Edward nodded, deeply amused. "I think you and Saya should have sleepovers more often." Roy played with the napkin. "I don't think so. She's cool and all, but one night with her is enough, besides I like it with just me and you here all the time."
"You're kidding right?" Edward asked.
"No, I'm not kidding. In fact tonight let's go out. You and me. How does that sound?" Edward thought about it and nodded. "That sound wonderful,Roy. While Saya is taking a shower in the guest room, I am going to take a shower in our room."
When Edward got up he noticed Roy was staring at him with something dangerous in his eyes. He held out a hand. "You want to come and join me?"
Roy took the hand and practiclly dragged Edward upstairs. He rolled his eyes, and Roy always wonders why Edward never takes over but maybe tonight will be different.
The End.
Well how did you like it? Katrina-chan you better review and like it!!! ^_^ Review Please!!