A/N: This is my first ST fic so be nice. It's AU in the sense that it follows none of the real plot other than McCoy is CMO and Kirk is Captain and so on. This is SLASH! It's Kirk/McCoy, McCoy/Kirk, Jim/Bones, and Leonard/Jim. Get it? Inspiration came from the movie A Walk to Remember and the song 'Life After You' by Daughtry. More chapters to come soon. =]

DISCLAIMER: I do not own, nor will I ever own Star Trek XI or the sexy characters within this fiction. I wish I did. There would be a LOT of lemon. =D

R&R I BEG OF YOU! *puppy dog face*

Bones looked down at his Captain with rage in his eyes. Jim was hurt and he was hurt bad. He'd been hurt worse of course but not in this way. This time, however, it wasn't an aliens fault. No, this time it was his own fault. Bones' fist had a part in it as well but the reason for that fist was all Jim's.

"Don't you ever try to play me like that again, kid." McCoy looked down right furious. Kirk looked hurt and scared. Though he was twenty-five, the man who was six years his senior had more power over him than he'd ever admit.

"Play you? Bones, I'm telling you, I'm not playing you! I've planned this out for weeks! It took everything I had to come here." He wiped a line of blood from his chin. Bones could hit really hard.

"Sure it did Jim. I'm sure you sat for weeks about how you were gonna tell me something you've probably told anything with legs that breaths." That thought seemed to make the doctor even madder. It made Jim hurt inside. He hurt as though someone had taken an old fashioned anvil and dropped it on his chest. This situation was getting out of hand quickly.

Jim had walked to his dorm slowly. Tonight was the night. He was finally going to tell his best friend exactly how he felt about him. For the first time in his life, James T. Kirk was going to say the three words to someone that he had never even said to his mother.

He was going to admit he loved someone other than himself.

When he opened the door, he walked over to where Bones was studying at his desk and stared at him for a while.

"You just gonna sit there kid? Or are you catch up on all that sleep you missed?" McCoy was gruff and not unusually so. His demeanor rarely changed.

"Don't need to." Jim's voice was soft and held no humor like it always did. This concerned McCoy and he turned around.

"Somethin' bothering you kid?"

"Yeah… well… kinda. Can I talk to you Bones? There's something I need to say." Jim kept his cool gaze aimed at the ground, afraid to lift it.

"Sure kid. I got time." McCoy was suspicious and concerned. He had never once seen the kid like this. It was unnatural!

"Bones, I thought about this long and hard. I made sure of it before now. At first I tried to make it go away. I thought I was just going through a thing, you know? But it stayed there. And I don't think I want it to go away."

"Jim do you have some sort of fungus or something? Is that what you're trying to tell me?" His sarcasm was emphasized by the ascent of one eyebrow.

"No Bones. That's not it. Just…" Jim sighed in frustration and pulled a hand over his face. "Leonard, I love you."

Before he knew what was happening, he was on the floor and stars had exploded across his field of vision.

"That's not true Bones. I never said it to anyone before but you." Jim looked up at his friend imploringly, willing McCoy to believe him! It wasn't working. McCoy raised a hand and whacked it across Jim's face at full force. The slap came damn near close to giving the last real Kirk whiplash.

"Don't fucking lie to me James. And don't think you can turn me into another one of your one-nighters. I think you need to leave before I do something we'll both regret." In fact, Leonard McCoy was already regretting what he had done. But that was too bad. He didn't know how, but somehow the kid had found out about how he really felt and decided to use it in a sick joke. Bones wasn't a fool.

Jim just lay on the floor, staring at the ceiling. He knew this was going to happen. Sure Bones had hit him before and it had hurt but this was different. It was like he was completely paralyzed. There was physical and emotional pain that felt like it would kill him soon.

Bones was getting impatient with his ex friend. The pathetic man was just lying on the floor, looking at nothing. Bones decided to help him along and gave him a sharp kick to the side. Jim whimpered and was snapped back to reality. Bones was the one person he would never, ever fight back against. Instead he stood up, now broken ribs groaning in protest while his head swam, and grabbed the bag he had packed. James Kirk was never unprepared for situations. He knew what the chances of this happening were. He made sure his few belongings were ready to be taken away from what he wanted.

Bones' rejection had just cemented what Jim already knew. No matter how many people Jim seemed to have in his life, in the end, he was the only one he could rely on. His father died to save his life. His mother only saw his father in his face and was never planet side for him when he needed her. His brother Sam left him to escape his step father. Jim had thought that Bones would be different. He dealt with all of his shit for nearly 5 years so far. Why should the third be any different? Oh right. Jim had to go and open his mouth.

The rain outside had soaked Jim instantly. His leather jacket was doing little to help repel the offensive droplets of water. Jim remembered that he had forgotten to leave the letter for Bones on his desk. He turned back and began the trek back. He'd already been outside for close to two hours. He had to give Bones the letter. It was imperative. Jim reached his old dorm and entered.

"Bones… sorry… forgot this…" All of the sudden Jim felt dizzy and hot. He noticed acute pain in his ribs that seemed to spread. He was swaying on his feet. Once Jim had pulled the letter from the one dry place in the middle of his bag, he left it on his old bed. Bones never said a word. Until Jim collapsed.

"Jim!"

A/N: So what'd ya think? I do believe I will continue this. It should get interesting. Can anyone guess what's wrong with Jim? How about McCoy's reaction? Huh? Huh? Can ya?!

-Bunny =3