Prologue:
Dear Diary,
What do you do when the one person, who can't stand you, never fails to make your heart skip a beat each and every time you see him? I don't know when and how exactly I developed these feelings, all I know is that they are here and I can't deny it. I hope it's not obvious; I try my best to hide the fact that I like him. But I find myself daydreaming about him sometimes. And I know he could never like me. To him, I'm just Alecia Walker.the Virgin Mary, the reverend's daughter, Miss Goody Two Shoes, the girl everyone loves to hate. He's always been cold towards me, but I was never quite sure. Maybe it's just me wishing that he could see me in a different light so that he could just realize that I am so much more than he thinks. But that will never happen. He and his friends have always made it crystal clear that they don't like me, through tripping me, calling me names, dropping my books, or whatever. But his whole image seems like an act to me. Like, underneath all that rebelliousness and rudeness there is a scared young man who is just too scared to realize his potential. Everyone says that he's trouble and that he would amount to nothing in life. I just think it's wrong that people would say that about him, he still has time to change his ways. People think I'm crazy for defending him after all he has done to me, but I want to believe that there is some good in everybody.Oh yeah, there's this new girl in school, her name is Kayla. She moved here from Philadelphia. She seems like a cool person. She's really nice. She never judged me based on how I looked and I'm sure since she moved here last month she's heard some stuff about me, but her attitude never changed so I'm happy about that. I'm sure when school starts everyone will love her.But with all that aside, I'm supposed to me moving in with my cousin Eric this weekend. Eric doesn't like me at all. Our parents think that it will be good for us. They can't stand us not getting along. They think that if we were constantly around each other then sooner or later we would have to get along. They have good intentions but it won't make a difference. Eric can't even stand to be in the same room with me. Even when we were kids, he was always mean to me. I never knew why. At school, we have the most of same classes and everything but he never says hi, all he does is make fun of me with his friends. Its not even like they start it. Most of the time it feels like he initiates it. Ok that's a little harsh, most of the time it is Belinda and they just add to it. Belinda hates me, and trust me hate is a strong word but I know she does. For some reason they all made me their enemy. I just think, it's all just so sad. In high school people care so much about what people care about them, but in the end none of that even matters. Who cares? Why is image so important? Having a reputation prevents you from growing. Life is about growing and changing and how can that happen when you are constantly labeled as cool or geek. Shane and Eric are the typical basketball stars, Walker is the track star, Dean is the typical football star, Belinda and Tracie are the typical cheerleaders. They rule this school, the popular kids. Either everyone wants to be their friend or everyone is scared to stand up to them. None of that really matters to me. I know who I am and that's all that matters. I just wish others could see that too.
Dear Diary,
What do you do when the one person, who can't stand you, never fails to make your heart skip a beat each and every time you see him? I don't know when and how exactly I developed these feelings, all I know is that they are here and I can't deny it. I hope it's not obvious; I try my best to hide the fact that I like him. But I find myself daydreaming about him sometimes. And I know he could never like me. To him, I'm just Alecia Walker.the Virgin Mary, the reverend's daughter, Miss Goody Two Shoes, the girl everyone loves to hate. He's always been cold towards me, but I was never quite sure. Maybe it's just me wishing that he could see me in a different light so that he could just realize that I am so much more than he thinks. But that will never happen. He and his friends have always made it crystal clear that they don't like me, through tripping me, calling me names, dropping my books, or whatever. But his whole image seems like an act to me. Like, underneath all that rebelliousness and rudeness there is a scared young man who is just too scared to realize his potential. Everyone says that he's trouble and that he would amount to nothing in life. I just think it's wrong that people would say that about him, he still has time to change his ways. People think I'm crazy for defending him after all he has done to me, but I want to believe that there is some good in everybody.Oh yeah, there's this new girl in school, her name is Kayla. She moved here from Philadelphia. She seems like a cool person. She's really nice. She never judged me based on how I looked and I'm sure since she moved here last month she's heard some stuff about me, but her attitude never changed so I'm happy about that. I'm sure when school starts everyone will love her.But with all that aside, I'm supposed to me moving in with my cousin Eric this weekend. Eric doesn't like me at all. Our parents think that it will be good for us. They can't stand us not getting along. They think that if we were constantly around each other then sooner or later we would have to get along. They have good intentions but it won't make a difference. Eric can't even stand to be in the same room with me. Even when we were kids, he was always mean to me. I never knew why. At school, we have the most of same classes and everything but he never says hi, all he does is make fun of me with his friends. Its not even like they start it. Most of the time it feels like he initiates it. Ok that's a little harsh, most of the time it is Belinda and they just add to it. Belinda hates me, and trust me hate is a strong word but I know she does. For some reason they all made me their enemy. I just think, it's all just so sad. In high school people care so much about what people care about them, but in the end none of that even matters. Who cares? Why is image so important? Having a reputation prevents you from growing. Life is about growing and changing and how can that happen when you are constantly labeled as cool or geek. Shane and Eric are the typical basketball stars, Walker is the track star, Dean is the typical football star, Belinda and Tracie are the typical cheerleaders. They rule this school, the popular kids. Either everyone wants to be their friend or everyone is scared to stand up to them. None of that really matters to me. I know who I am and that's all that matters. I just wish others could see that too.