Disclaimer: I do not mean to offend in anyway. I apologize for the mention of any copyrighted characters/individuals. That was beyond my control as this started out as a Round Robin. I do not consider it to truly be fan fiction though, since these characters make only brief appearances and do not dominate the main action, which has yet to become a fan fiction. It may yet, so it will then be posted at Until then, it is here.

Summary: The Second Spin-Off of The Love Triangle, following Spaced Cadets. This story focuses on the Bowtani Family, Osama bin Goaten Senior, Pendleton Wrongrighter, and Kathleen the Platypus.

Rating: Oh, let's just say PG for good measure.

Notes: This chapter was written by Me, Jessica and Danny on a mission trip to Denver. If you would like me to annotate who wrote which part please let me know.

Title: Named for the first character introduced, Ziv Bowtani.

Feedback: most welcome! And if you'd like to help write it, please ask! I'm more than willing to allow new people to join in.

American Boys

Season One

Episode One

"Ziv"

Ziv was lonely. he was sitting sadly and pathetic like in his backyard. Nobody else was home so he had nobody to talk to and his parents were bizarre and wouldn't allow for pets in the house so he had no furry beasts to play with. Unless you included the neighbor's cat Snowball, who was actually psychotic and quite viciously violent despite his cuddly name and fluffy fuzzy appearance. So sadly Ziv was all alone. He was verging on the point of naming the stump in the backyard Antwon just so he could have some sort of pseudo-companionship, but he doubted Antwon would be much fun or that thrilling a conversationalist. So instead, Ziv decided to just go for a walk. But as he got up to leave, the phone rang, and it was his cousin Tofu from Atlantic City calling to talk to Cher. "No Cher resides here," speaks Ziv sadly.

"Alright then give the phone to the stump in the backyard." Ziv was suddenly suspicious of the once friendly looking stump in his backyard.

"Why do you want to talk to the stump?" Ziv questioned.

"Oh you don't know yet do you?" Tofu asked.

"What don't I know?" Ziv asked but Tofu had already hung up. Ziv slowly set the phone down and slowly turned toward his back door. There, in the doorway, was Antwon the Stump! Somehow he had moved from the backyard and was now stumped in the house, silently and still like. Ziv slowly walked towards the stump, trying not to alarm it into sudden action. But as he got closer, he began to notice certain details about the stump. Such as, it appeared as if it wasn't actually a stump but almost like a duck blind. he could make out an area where a creature of small stature could possibly see through and the bottom of the stump didn't touch the floor.

Ziv gasped and stepped back in surprise. "That's right," a small high pitched voice said. "It is I..." the stump costume was tossed aside to reveal that is was really his brother Tenson! who was later taken away by giant water balloons. Many of them. but Xbie was surprised by this thought, because her brain was taken away by Prof. Nardner.

Xbie was Ziv's gardener and as she arrived for her shift, arrived just in time to see Tenson being carried away. And she was angered because now their evil plan to kill Ziv was over. Smite that evil Professor Nardner! Someday she would BANG!

Ziv awoke startled and confused. Ziv had a strange sleeping problem and he had fallen asleep. Cher awoke him with a smack on the head with a stir fry pan. "It was all a dream. Thank goodness for that," Ziv exclaimed.

"But this isn't one." Cher said and proceeded to take a gun out of her wig and shot Ziv 17 times. Just then... there was a knock at the door. Cher carefully opened it and gasped it was...

To Be Continued...