Everything that Might had Been

She remembered her first day at work. It was a simple job, working at a performing restaurant. She hadn't met him, yet. She just soldiered through taking orders and singing songs. If she was anything, she was a hard worker.

Then one day she went to work and saw that a manager she hadn't met was running the night shift. Before she even went to her first table she went to find the man in the all black uniform that the management was required to wear. When she found him she confidently said, "Are you Jesse?"

The man smiled at her forwardness, "Yes, I am," he simply answered.

"I am Rachel Berry, I am your waitress for section two tonight, it is very nice to meet you," she shook his hand, finally noticing the attractiveness in his smile and eyes. She was a goner from that moment on.

Over the next few weeks she found herself working under his shift, being caught off guard when he wasn't her manager. In moments of slowness all of the coworkers would fall into conversations.

This how she discovered how much they had in common, he was a theatre major at the University of Ohio (something she wanted to be at NYU), he had taken the advance music and theatre curriculum in high school (stating that AP tests only were worth something if you were going into the field of the subject) and he had been in the captain of his glee club (top ranking Vocal Adrenaline.)

For Rachel Berry this was too much. Her best friend Blaine Anderson had pushed her to say something more to him, to tell the man how she felt. She was scared. The boys who had shown interest in her usually stomped on her heart, leaving her broken. He was also three years her senior. Even though they were at the age where age scarcely mattered, she couldn't but think, 'Here is this amazing guy, he must have tons of girls going after him. He is amazing. He wouldn't want me when he could have any number of college girls vying for his attention.'

That stop her from admiring him whenever he was in the room, or smiling whenever he came near. She would likely shake when they worked near one another in a dinner rush, blushing each time his arm came into contact with hers.

Then one day they were a singer short and Jesse had to wait tables for the night. She heard his voice and her heart soared. It was esquisite. Everything about him was. His voice was as good as hers. It was amazing.

Happily she worked beside him, flirting with the younger coworkers, always looking at him. She tried to ignore how she felt yet he wouldn't allow it. He would inquire at least once a week as to how New Directions was doing. He would compliment her to no end about her skill as a worker and a performer. She brushed it off. He couldn't like her, why would he?

Then she heard the news, he was leaving. Her heart went to her throat. Two months of working with him and she couldn't imagine him not being there. He trusted, he liked her. They so much alike. One night the restaurant was absolutely dead so the waiting staff and the cooks gathered in the front to just talk. Jesse was easily made fun of as the manager. Rachel easily came to his defense. He smiled at her each time.

Hearing that he was to leave was a bit much. She continued to work, each shift with him she aware that it could be her last. His last week she had no shifts with him. It broke her heart, not knowing when they would see each other again.

One of her father's birthday was coming up so she scheduled a place for the family at the restaurant, which was during Jesse's last shift as manager. She carefully dressed herself, aware that this would probably be the last night she would see him and that this would be the first time he saw her outside of the horrendous work uniform.

She walked into the establishment, carefully accounting who was working the shift, her eyes searching for him. Quietly her family sat at their table, discussing politics and theatre, when she saw him. His black shirt tugged around him, his smile wide. He was walking toward their table.

He quickly inquired as to how everyone was, telling them that the meal would be free and that Rachel was an asset to the restaurant. He then left to get them a dessert.

Her papa smiled at her, "Who is he?"

"He's my manager."

And then he asked the deadly question (she never talked with her parents about guys), "How old is he?"

"Twenty-one."

Her father nodded (in that way that said he noticed something between the two) as Jesse returned. Boldness suddenly overcame her as she said, "So this is your last shift?"

"Yeah," he answered calmly, the wide smile that she had come to love staying on his face.

"Well," she paused to look in his eyes as the stared into hers, "We're going to miss you around here."

"I'm going to miss you too Rach," his face was serious with an emotion that she couldn't read.

Her family happily finished their meal when Rachel asked if she could be excused for a few seconds. Quickly she walked to the manager's office and said, "Good luck Jesse with whatever you are doing in life."

His face was complex as he replied, "Good luck to you too Rachel. Have a great life."

As her family left the restaurant her heart was heavy. Ever since graduation day she had been learning that life was a series of goodbyes, even if the words never passed ones lips. It was usually, "Have a good life." And it broke her heart each time those words were said.

In this case she had just said goodbye to a man that she fell for. A man who would never know how many times she had to ban him from her thoughts because he was her manager. She didn't go to her land of imagination with him because she knew she felt something for him, even as she pushed it away. This was the first guy she not only thought about having more with, but could easily see those discussions about Broadway easing into dates. She could see them having more. She wanted more with him.

That night as she fell to sleep, she allowed her mind to wander. Their first date would have been something simple like a carnival, where they could laugh and have fun. He would try to win her some prize but would only get her a small stuffed animal that she would love because he had gotten it for her. Afterwards he would walk her to her front door and lightly kiss on the lips. They would laugh love and live together. Being there for every performance, every moment.

That morning as she woke up, her heart was heavy. He might have felt something for her just as she felt something for him. The dreams might have been a reality had she taken chance. Now nothing could happen.

Hello Readers! So, this a bit more depressing then my average love story. Let's just say that art imitates life sometimes. I hope you all enjoyed it either way! Haha! Now I need to write something fun.

Maybe I should update Looking for Something before some of my readers kill me (I am working on the next chapter I just want it to be amazing after a three month hiatus, which I explain why at the beginning of the new chapter. Expect it later today.)

I love all of my readers and thank you for reading.

-Sami